Marry for Money not Love

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  • kgeyser
    kgeyser Posts: 22,505 Member
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    I married for love and future income potential.
  • Collier78
    Collier78 Posts: 811 Member
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    I married a social worker...so definitely NOT for money...However, he has since gone on to get another degree and move into a higher income bracket. I also make a good salary, that I didn't make when we met and married. SO win/win I guess..LOL
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
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    Why can't a woman find both? Are these things necessarily mutually exclusive? Are wealthy men inherently unlovable, while less well-off men are the ultimate in lovey-dovey perfection?
    They need emotional detachment so they can make use of your money when you "die".
  • rachelrb85
    rachelrb85 Posts: 579 Member
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    Damnit, I'm doing it wrong. Any sugar daddys out there that I can leave my loving husband for?

    Love is over rated. Let me give you all of my money so you can have sex with the pool boy.

    We have a pool?!

    1245617624poolboy.gif
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    When I met my wife ( 18 years ago I was in line to move up the ladder to near $500.00/day... "IF we're getting married" she said.. "Your not doing that anymore for a living (detonating explosives at the time).. SO I quit... and found a job making $12/hour... talk about financial shock... I went from shopping for Armani and Valentino to thrift store finds in one fell swoop.... BUT You do what you need to.. and look for opportunities... now she does what she loves... and I just broke past that $100K mark...

    I married for love... and she obviously wasn't into me for the money otherwise she would have been happy with my blowing *kitten* up :) and myself at some point I am sure.. and I am still worth more dead than alive :)

    That's nice that it worked for you, but any woman that told me I couldn't do a job i liked doing, probably wouldn't be with me much longer.

    I agree, but it depends a lot on phrasing.

    "I love you, but I can't marry you if I'm going to have to worry about you coming home from work each day" is a fair statement.

    "You aren't allowed to ride your motorcycle" is a whole 'nother ballgame.
  • KseRz
    KseRz Posts: 980 Member
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    I know of great guys out there -- journalists, teachers, non-profit dudes -- who will probably make great dads. But I personally wouldn't wouldn't advise women pair up with them because, realistically, his salaries just wouldn't be enough to cut it for what they want out of life. But, but, but, "Bank accounts shouldn't matter at all!" And while I agree with that in theory, sorry, a man who can provide for a woman and their children is just much more attractive.

    Right, women?

    Right

    http://www.ehbonline.org/article/S1090-5138(14)00003-8/abstract

    Abstract

    Sex differences in the framing effect within the mating domain (and the underlying negativity bias) were investigated. In three separate studies, men and women evaluated eight prospective mates, each of which was described using either positively or negatively framed attribute information. The key difference between the three studies was the temporal context of the relationship for which the mates were considered (long-term versus short-term) and the quality of mates that were presented to the participants (high quality versus low quality). Overall, women exhibited larger framing effects than men (and in three of the four experimental conditions), and this sex difference was driven by women's greater sensitivity to negatively framed information. This robust sex effect is a manifestation of the greater vigilance that women show within the mating domain (consistent with parental investment theory). At the attribute level, women displayed stronger framing effects than men in 10 of the 11 cases where significant results were found, and these were on attributes that accord with evolutionary principles (e.g., women exhibited larger framing effects for Earning Potential and Ambition while men yielded a larger effect in only one instance for Attractive Face). Finally, the sex differences in framing effects became stronger when evaluating short-term mates as compared to long term ones (in accord with the general guiding principles of Sexual Strategies Theory). The current paper situates the framing effect within an adaptationist framework and proposes, that in many instances, the pattern with which individuals succumb to it is an instantiation of ecological rationality.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
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    When I met my wife ( 18 years ago I was in line to move up the ladder to near $500.00/day... "IF we're getting married" she said.. "Your not doing that anymore for a living (detonating explosives at the time).. SO I quit... and found a job making $12/hour... talk about financial shock... I went from shopping for Armani and Valentino to thrift store finds in one fell swoop.... BUT You do what you need to.. and look for opportunities... now she does what she loves... and I just broke past that $100K mark...

    I married for love... and she obviously wasn't into me for the money otherwise she would have been happy with my blowing *kitten* up :) and myself at some point I am sure.. and I am still worth more dead than alive :)

    That's nice that it worked for you, but any woman that told me I couldn't do a job i liked doing, probably wouldn't be with me much longer.

    I agree, but it depends a lot on phrasing.

    "I love you, but I can't marry you if I'm going to have to worry about you coming home from work each day" is a fair statement.

    "You aren't allowed to ride your motorcycle" is a whole 'nother ballgame.

    no motorcycle.... no relationship.

    So glad my man rides. we'd be over if he said I couldn't.
    Same with dance.

    My Bike- my horse- my dance- they are my first loves- I have had them by my side longer than I have known you- so you go before they go.
  • AsaThorsWoman
    AsaThorsWoman Posts: 2,303 Member
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    I don't care how much money he makes, as long as he works hard. If he works hard for $25,000/yr or $75,000/yr it's all the same to me.

    I want biceps and a good libido.
  • disneygallagirl
    disneygallagirl Posts: 515 Member
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    so to summarize, pool boy and drinks?
    I'm IN
  • Deipneus
    Deipneus Posts: 1,862 Member
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    I know of great guys out there -- journalists, teachers, non-profit dudes -- who will probably make great dads. But I personally wouldn't wouldn't advise women pair up with them because, realistically, his salaries just wouldn't be enough to cut it for what they want out of life. But, but, but, "Bank accounts shouldn't matter at all!" And while I agree with that in theory, sorry, a man who can provide for a woman and their children is just much more attractive.

    Right, women?
    Holy crap. I went to sleep and woke up in 1960!
  • kimberlyblindsey
    kimberlyblindsey Posts: 266 Member
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    Mr. Darcy soon drew the attention of the room by his fine, tall person, handsome features, noble mien, and the report which was in general circulation within five minutes after his entrance, of his having ten thousand a year. The gentlemen pronounced him to be a fine figure of a man, the ladies declared he was much handsomer than Mr. Bingley, and he was looked at with great admiration for about half the evening, till his manners gave a disgust which turned the tide of his popularity; for he was discovered to be proud; to be above his company, and above being pleased; and not all his large estate in Derbyshire could then save him from having a most forbidding, disagreeable countenance, and being unworthy to be compared with his friend.
    ^Austin, Mr. Darcy. . . . swoon, I'm in.
  • kinkyslinky16
    kinkyslinky16 Posts: 1,469 Member
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    tumblr_mvjfckgL0e1s8asgxo1_500.jpg

    and....... yes, yes I do. Sugar daddies, please apply via PM. :love:
  • Lofteren
    Lofteren Posts: 960 Member
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    My stepmother married my father for money. He was good looking for his age and very wealthy and she was 21 years old, had huge fake boobs and only spoke Russian... match made in heaven huh?

    I have absolutely no respect for any person who marries for money, period. How shallow and selfish can you possibly be?

    I understand that you don't want to marry a slouch or a loser but you should want to marry someone who is more successful because it says something about the quality of their character, not the size of their checkbook.
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
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    I married for love and future income potential.

    My wife used to say this. I'm kind of a let down.
  • elv1ra
    elv1ra Posts: 146 Member
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    Sure, why not? dating for love hasn't gotten me anywhere.
  • Veil5577
    Veil5577 Posts: 868 Member
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    I left a financially secure marriage because neither of us were happy and am now struggling financially on my own. Do I regret it? Not one bit. I have my freedom and independence now and that's worth the struggle to me.
  • Kitten2629
    Kitten2629 Posts: 1,358 Member
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    Wait, are we drinking? It's not noon yet here. Can I go ahead and have a beer? Or would that be wrong? *rubs hands together nervously and twitches*

    It's 5 o'clock some where.. Bottoms up :)
  • Saucy_lil_Minx
    Saucy_lil_Minx Posts: 3,302 Member
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    Wait, are we drinking? It's not noon yet here. Can I go ahead and have a beer? Or would that be wrong? *rubs hands together nervously and twitches*

    It's 5 o'clock some where.. Bottoms up :)


    I'm in for the drinking! Never getting married again at this point for any reason! Maybe I'll change my mind when the right one comes along. Since I just got rid of the wrong one I'll stay happily single!:drinker: :drinker:
  • LassoOfTruth
    LassoOfTruth Posts: 735 Member
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    No, not true. I prefer a broke fool over a rich *kitten* any day.
  • AsaThorsWoman
    AsaThorsWoman Posts: 2,303 Member
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    With that being said...

    I was raised middle-class.

    I did date a guy once that's family was effected by generational poverty.

    They thought I was a snob because I cooked with olive oil.

    I don't care how much they make per hour, but we are going to have to be used to the same lifestyle.

    I use electricity, plumbing, multiple cooking oils, bank accounts, etc etc etc

    If you think that makes me a snob, well, find yourself a nice girl elsewhere.

    My boyfriend right now was raised with a lot of money, although he only makes $10/hr or something like that.

    The cost of living is very inexpensive in Oklahoma.

    We both maintain just fine and take vacations, buy random hobby stuff, drink expensive beer, we're going boating this weekend, visit amusement parks, museums, mall shopping... etc etc etc

    on what most of the country would consider to be poverty but it's not here.

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