Do i have the right to be upset?

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  • Gonenova
    Gonenova Posts: 5
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    He's lying to you. He didn't want to come see you. Also, have you already met?
  • farmerpam1
    farmerpam1 Posts: 402 Member
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    You have the right to feel whatever you feel. Sounds like he has serious mother issues, you'd think he'd want to get away from the situation and that being with you would be a relief. Dump him, you'll be glad you did in the long run.:flowerforyou: Just sayin'......
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,953 Member
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    You're not overreacting. He's being cruel.

    Let's put it this way: He's basically say he feels like crap and you'll make him feel either the same or worse.

    When I have a bad day, I WANT to see my bf because being with him cheers me up. I know it's the same for him too. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with you or him. Just that the combination might not work out. But you can see how it goes.

    It does show you how much he values you though. He values his alone time more than you. Again, not saying he doesn't deserve alone time but he should be able to recognize when it's not appropriate for him to ask that of you. And a rare occasion to see you is less important to him than maintaining his frustration? Hmm. That and traveling on a train or in a car is relaxing and would give him plenty of time to calm down.

    I once had a long distance relationship too. I broke up with the guy because he wouldn't Skype with me - he wouldn't let me see his face for month because he'd gained weight (funny enough, he gained the weight WHILE I was visiting him so I already knew and had seen). It told me his vanity was more important to him than having a healthy relationship.

    Just my opinion though. You need to assess it for yourself and I think this forum is only going to work you up more than you were originally.
  • sarahrosheen
    sarahrosheen Posts: 82 Member
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    he's just not that into you !
  • Chibukalu908
    Chibukalu908 Posts: 212
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    Well this situations all comes down to trust. Does she trust him or is she going to jump to conclusions. BTW when some men I know including me get angry, pissed off about whatever and our gf call. If we don't want to talk we don't. Does not mean we are getting something on the side. It means go away. Then we see the pile on missed calls and texts. We don't get happier. We might get even more pissed like look why are you still calling after I did not answer miss call # 10.
    "Oh My God! She's calling me AGAIN! What a b1tch! Wish she'd just stop calling me!"

    How horrible to have a girlfriend who cares about you and wants to talk, sort a situation out before it develops into something nastier. If you're so hellbent on not talking, be a decent human being and send an effing text message at least. Takes a few seconds and she has at least SOME kind of communication from you.

    If you're in a relationship, you aren't single and that means you hopefully WANT to talk to your best friend. Isn't there any limit to how selfish people can be? I suggest you look up the definition of compromise, because we are still talking about a long-distance relationship where communication is the only bond between two people when geography keeps them apart.

    thank you.i agree with you
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,953 Member
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    You're gonna end up single because of an MFP thread filled with women with axes to grind.

    And some of the WORST views on relationships I have ever heard!

    Except until you free yourself from the duds, you can't make way for the gems. And hopefully she'll use her own brain and make her own decision.
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
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    Well this situations all comes down to trust. Does she trust him or is she going to jump to conclusions. BTW when some men I know including me get angry, pissed off about whatever and our gf call. If we don't want to talk we don't. Does not mean we are getting something on the side. It means go away. Then we see the pile on missed calls and texts. We don't get happier. We might get even more pissed like look why are you still calling after I did not answer miss call # 10.
    "Oh My God! She's calling me AGAIN! What a b1tch! Wish she'd just stop calling me!"

    How horrible to have a girlfriend who cares about you and wants to talk, sort a situation out before it develops into something nastier. If you're so hellbent on not talking, be a decent human being and send an effing text message at least. Takes a few seconds and she has at least SOME kind of communication from you.

    If you're in a relationship, you aren't single and that means you hopefully WANT to talk to your best friend. Isn't there any limit to how selfish people can be? I suggest you look up the definition of compromise, because we are still talking about a long-distance relationship where communication is the only bond between two people when geography keeps them apart.

    thank you.i agree with you

    You know without the ***** part that is exactly what my friend said. He got up to 46 miss calls. Now he is marrying the same girl. I think that was around year two of there five year relationship. So yes that is how some guys feels. If I am angry and I ignore my gf call for whatever reason then I would think why do I see miss call 26 with 10 new text. Have you ever dated a guy that would let your miss call count get above I say 5 and thats a lot? I don't get about 2.
  • strangek1
    strangek1 Posts: 6 Member
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    I honestly thought this was written by a 17 year old... Seeing that you're 29, I'm assuming he's close to the same age. If a 29 year old man gets all moody and whiney because he had a fight with his mom, he's a bit of a sissy, and you should re-evaluate your relationship.

    The truth of the matter is this... He has a side-piece. Since you have the weekend off, you should get one too.
  • headofphat
    headofphat Posts: 1,597 Member
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    No one believes he's your boyfriend.
  • HannahLynn91
    HannahLynn91 Posts: 238 Member
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    Yeah I think he's lying to you, because he had a fight with his mom and is mad? Why wouldn't he want to get out of there and spend time with you and not be around her?

    You have every right to be mad. Not Lorena Bobbit mad, but miffed.

    lmfao. Definitely not that mad hah.

    bobbit.png

    I agree, I think it's an excuse too, and really lame one.
  • Jim_Barteck
    Jim_Barteck Posts: 274 Member
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    honestly, pretty sure he's lying to you. But to answer your question, yes, I'd be upset.

    QFT

    That is the most BS excuse I've ever heard, and the not returning phone calls and texts on top of it should be setting off alarm bells.
  • gym_king_carlie
    gym_king_carlie Posts: 528 Member
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    Im newly single and I was in a LD relationship, I would do anything to go and see my girlfriend, I swapped shifts, worked overtime lost sleep, but it was worth it, sadly it wasn't worth it to her as she left me lol
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
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    Well this situations all comes down to trust. Does she trust him or is she going to jump to conclusions. BTW when some men I know including me get angry, pissed off about whatever and our gf call. If we don't want to talk we don't. Does not mean we are getting something on the side. It means go away. Then we see the pile on missed calls and texts. We don't get happier. We might get even more pissed like look why are you still calling after I did not answer miss call # 10.
    "Oh My God! She's calling me AGAIN! What a b1tch! Wish she'd just stop calling me!"

    How horrible to have a girlfriend who cares about you and wants to talk, sort a situation out before it develops into something nastier. If you're so hellbent on not talking, be a decent human being and send an effing text message at least. Takes a few seconds and she has at least SOME kind of communication from you.

    If you're in a relationship, you aren't single and that means you hopefully WANT to talk to your best friend. Isn't there any limit to how selfish people can be? I suggest you look up the definition of compromise, because we are still talking about a long-distance relationship where communication is the only bond between two people when geography keeps them apart.

    thank you.i agree with you

    You're gonna end up single because of an MFP thread filled with women with axes to grind.

    And some of the WORST views on relationships I have ever heard!
    I don't know what your idea of a relationship is but here's mine:
    - The couple are each other's best friends
    - They keep each other in the loop; it is reasonable to expect one's partner to share what's going on and if you're pissed off and need some time alone just say so, but as long as you shut your partner out, they have no idea of what is going on (since they usually can't read minds) - and once one has told the other either verbally or in text that (s)he needs some space, the other one respects that need
    - The couple trust each other - but to be able to trust, one needs some information from time to time; I don't believe in stalking but I also don't believe in withholding information just for the sake of it (I never knew my husband's passwords to cell phone, computer, etc. and I never asked for them either, although in emergencies it might be a good idea to have them)
    - The partners make efforts for each other even when the initial reaction would be to do something selfish; I see this as compromise

    I do have high standards. I hate loud arguments just for the sake of it and I do believe in filtering what comes out of your mouth. I don't believe the home is where everything needs to be barfed out without any restraints what so ever, but I also believe in making room for frustrations, anger and sadness to be voiced without judgment. Adults communicate. Oh, and I'm also extremely loyal, so if my guy makes efforts for me, he sure receives it back many times. I guess this would be an awful bargain for some, but then we wouldn't be a match.
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
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    You're gonna end up single because of an MFP thread filled with women with axes to grind.

    And some of the WORST views on relationships I have ever heard!
    I don't know what your idea of a relationship is but here's mine:
    - The couple are each other's best friends
    - They keep each other in the loop; it is reasonable to expect one's partner to share what's going on and if you're pissed off and need some time alone just say so, but as long as you shut your partner out, they have no idea of what is going on (since they usually can't read minds) - and once one has told the other either verbally or in text that (s)he needs some space, the other one respects that need
    - The couple trust each other - but to be able to trust, one needs some information from time to time; I don't believe in stalking but I also don't believe in withholding information just for the sake of it (I never knew my husband's passwords to cell phone, computer, etc. and I never asked for them either, although in emergencies it might be a good idea to have them)
    - The partners make efforts for each other even when the initial reaction would be to do something selfish; I see this as compromise

    I do have high standards. I hate loud arguments just for the sake of it and I do believe in filtering what comes out of your mouth. I don't believe the home is where everything needs to be barfed out without any restraints what so ever, but I also believe in making room for frustrations, anger and sadness to be voiced without judgment. Adults communicate. Oh, and I'm also extremely loyal, so if my guy makes efforts for me, he sure receives it back many times. I guess this would be an awful bargain for some, but then we wouldn't be a match.

    Here's one of mine:

    -Don't start an internet thread airing our private business


    Here's another:

    -When you believe a crowd of strangers on the internet more than you believe me, we're done
    Sure, I never wash my dirty laundry in public, but not everyone is the same. I'm curious what you thought about my requirements.
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    Options

    You're gonna end up single because of an MFP thread filled with women with axes to grind.

    And some of the WORST views on relationships I have ever heard!
    I don't know what your idea of a relationship is but here's mine:
    - The couple are each other's best friends
    - They keep each other in the loop; it is reasonable to expect one's partner to share what's going on and if you're pissed off and need some time alone just say so, but as long as you shut your partner out, they have no idea of what is going on (since they usually can't read minds) - and once one has told the other either verbally or in text that (s)he needs some space, the other one respects that need
    - The couple trust each other - but to be able to trust, one needs some information from time to time; I don't believe in stalking but I also don't believe in withholding information just for the sake of it (I never knew my husband's passwords to cell phone, computer, etc. and I never asked for them either, although in emergencies it might be a good idea to have them)
    - The partners make efforts for each other even when the initial reaction would be to do something selfish; I see this as compromise

    I do have high standards. I hate loud arguments just for the sake of it and I do believe in filtering what comes out of your mouth. I don't believe the home is where everything needs to be barfed out without any restraints what so ever, but I also believe in making room for frustrations, anger and sadness to be voiced without judgment. Adults communicate. Oh, and I'm also extremely loyal, so if my guy makes efforts for me, he sure receives it back many times. I guess this would be an awful bargain for some, but then we wouldn't be a match.

    Here's one of mine:

    -Don't start an internet thread airing our private business


    Here's another:

    -When you believe a crowd of strangers on the internet more than you believe me, we're done

    I used to thing you were just one of those trolls. Not anymore you're cool in my book.
  • sassyjae21
    sassyjae21 Posts: 1,217 Member
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    You're gonna end up single because of an MFP thread filled with women with axes to grind.

    And some of the WORST views on relationships I have ever heard!
    I don't know what your idea of a relationship is but here's mine:
    - The couple are each other's best friends
    - They keep each other in the loop; it is reasonable to expect one's partner to share what's going on and if you're pissed off and need some time alone just say so, but as long as you shut your partner out, they have no idea of what is going on (since they usually can't read minds) - and once one has told the other either verbally or in text that (s)he needs some space, the other one respects that need
    - The couple trust each other - but to be able to trust, one needs some information from time to time; I don't believe in stalking but I also don't believe in withholding information just for the sake of it (I never knew my husband's passwords to cell phone, computer, etc. and I never asked for them either, although in emergencies it might be a good idea to have them)
    - The partners make efforts for each other even when the initial reaction would be to do something selfish; I see this as compromise

    I do have high standards. I hate loud arguments just for the sake of it and I do believe in filtering what comes out of your mouth. I don't believe the home is where everything needs to be barfed out without any restraints what so ever, but I also believe in making room for frustrations, anger and sadness to be voiced without judgment. Adults communicate. Oh, and I'm also extremely loyal, so if my guy makes efforts for me, he sure receives it back many times. I guess this would be an awful bargain for some, but then we wouldn't be a match.

    Here's one of mine:

    -Don't start an internet thread airing our private business


    Here's another:

    -When you believe a crowd of strangers on the internet more than you believe me, we're done

    Just wanted to point out that there were also plenty of guys who said that he was cheating. It isn't just women claiming she should just dump him.

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