Boyfriends buying junk food...
Replies
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Well, this problem for me was solved by the fact that I am very short, and my boyfriend is somewhat tall. When he started bringing home sugary and salty snacks again (he had two molars extracted a few weeks ago) I told him to put them on top of the cabinets where I'd have to climb if I really wanted them. Out of sight, out of mind for me.
He does have to put his candy bars in the fridge where I can see, but I make sure they stay right next to healthy options for me. Sugar free jello and pudding or something else sweet but forgiving.0 -
People who are giving tough love on this don't seem to understand the power of temptation. Temptation, especially in the beginning of a new food-lifestyle change is very difficult to deal with. You are resisting old habits, and food that almost acts like a powerful drug to give you the "happys." Plus, there is a social/intimacy aspect to eating. People in relationships also share meal experiences, and when one person changes, it puts a strain on the relationship. Some couples handle that really well and support each other, and some have growing pains.
As someone who definitely understands how hard it is to resist snacks when they are readily available, especially when you are feeling less strong, let me add some suggestions:
1. Ask him to keep the snacks in a place that is not easy to get to. He can put it up high like on top of the refrigerator, or maybe behind other stuff in the pantry. We have a pantry in our basement for extra stuff, so my husband puts stuff downstairs too.
2. Find a snack that you really like that fits into an acceptable calorie requirement, and that is similar to your BF's, Maybe a skinny cow ice cream? Only eat it when he pulls out his sweet treat. Then you will both have a sweet thing at the same time, but yours will be planned and controlled.
3. Find some new activities to do during the times when he likes to snack. Try and do new things together. So if Sat night consists of sitting in front of the tv and snacking, suggest going for a walk, the gym, playing a video game, going out, some other hobby. Or get out of the room when he's snacking if it helps. It only takes maybe 15-20 minutes to eat? That's not too much time away from him.
4. Remember, its your old habits that brought you to MFP with the idea of becoming a healthier you. So if one of those old habits is snacking with the BF, than its time to examine how to make that situation work for you.0 -
People who are giving tough love on this don't seem to understand the power of temptation. Temptation, especially in the beginning of a new food-lifestyle change is very difficult to deal with. You are resisting old habits, and food that almost acts like a powerful drug to give you the "happys." Plus, there is a social/intimacy aspect to eating. People in relationships also share meal experiences, and when one person changes, it puts a strain on the relationship. Some couples handle that really well and support each other, and some have growing pains.
As someone who definitely understands how hard it is to resist snacks when they are readily available, especially when you are feeling less strong, let me add some suggestions:
1. Ask him to keep the snacks in a place that is not easy to get to. He can put it up high like on top of the refrigerator, or maybe behind other stuff in the pantry. We have a pantry in our basement for extra stuff, so my husband puts stuff downstairs too.
2. Find a snack that you really like that fits into an acceptable calorie requirement, and that is similar to your BF's, Maybe a skinny cow ice cream? Only eat it when he pulls out his sweet treat. Then you will both have a sweet thing at the same time, but yours will be planned and controlled.
3. Find some new activities to do during the times when he likes to snack. Try and do new things together. So if Sat night consists of sitting in front of the tv and snacking, suggest going for a walk, the gym, playing a video game, going out, some other hobby. Or get out of the room when he's snacking if it helps. It only takes maybe 15-20 minutes to eat? That's not too much time away from him.
4. Remember, its your old habits that brought you to MFP with the idea of becoming a healthier you. So if one of those old habits is snacking with the BF, than its time to examine how to make that situation work for you.
It has nothing to do with not understanding temptation. Am I tempted to eat the whole tray of brownies .. sure but I make a decision to eat my portion and save the rest.
It takes learning when to say no, I want this more than I want the entire tray of brownies0 -
Is he trying to lose weight? No? Then don't expect him to stop eating foods he likes. My husband keeps whatever he wants in the house because, well, it's his house too, and just because I don't eat something doesn't mean he can't either. No point in taking something away from someone because you don't have the self control to not eat it.0
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Your profile states that you are 18 years old. Blaming others for your choices is a very bad habit to develop in life. Blaming others will never help you reach your goals so don’t practice that bad habit. You will be faced with temptations of one form or another for the rest of your life. The sooner you take responsibility for your choices then the better off you will be as an adult. It is not your boyfriend's fault that you don't have self-control. Just as your boyfriend buys food that works for him then you should do the same. Figure out a way to enjoy your time with him while sticking to your weight loss plan.0
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Anyone have a boyfriend who loves to buy junk food?
Well, I do. And it's bloody difficult.
I'm trying to cut that kind of stuff out of my diet, so I can finally start to lose weight again'. But he seems to buy a load of junk food when he's at home on the weekends.
I know I should be able to control myself but I'm human and fat, so I can't.
I've tried to get him to stop but he seems to be addicted to sugar or something, so he isn't going to stop buying this stuff.
How do I resist the urge. What am I supposed to say to myself? What am I supposed to do?
I have a husband and son that love sweet treats...so we buy them or I make them...
Like yesterday there is no less than 3 different things made in my house by me...
He is not addicted to sugar he is eating what he wants...it's not up to him to control what you eat just like it's not up to you.
And yes you should be able to control yourself...regardless....when you see a purse in a store you can't afford do you steal it? No you control yourself...it's called being an adult.
If you want to lose the weight bad enough you do one of two things....fit it in your calories or don't eat it.
Darn...guess I should return those purses then.... :-\0 -
self control0
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I am looking for a 2nd boyfriend...0
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what about allocating him a "junk cupboard" in the kitchen. All his junk food goes in there and you simply dont open the door - out of sight, out of mind and all that. Or if you are really bad at willpower - put a lock on the cupboard door and give him the key - you cant eat it, if you cant get to it0
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I recognize that all food is food, and there are some foods that I can't have on a regular basis. My husband would eat pizzas and chicken nuggets constantly. I would have some nuggets, log it, then move on. It was much easier than pretending I didn't want any and eventually bingeing.0
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Just got to be strong and avoid it, my boyfriend is 6"6 and eats whatever the hell he likes and doesn't gain a pound, I often tell him to buy krispy kreme or sweets and just watch him like a slobbering dog..... then have a bowl of porridge with boiling water or I'll have a protein shake which I use as a dessert, PHD vanilla diet whey is soooo yummy!! :-D
Don't want him to change for me, it's just will power xxx0 -
If you live with him, move out.
If you don't live together, spend less time with him.
Eventually, you two should just break up.0 -
Keep your food stash separate- that's the easiest most realistic way- keep it in a place where you don't regularly go in the pantry- put it up high- or down low where it is out of eye site.
that will go a long way to helping.0 -
Anyone have a boyfriend who loves to buy junk food?
Well, I do. And it's bloody difficult.
I'm trying to cut that kind of stuff out of my diet, so I can finally start to lose weight again'. But he seems to buy a load of junk food when he's at home on the weekends.
I know I should be able to control myself but I'm human and fat, so I can't.
I've tried to get him to stop but he seems to be addicted to sugar or something, so he isn't going to stop buying this stuff.
How do I resist the urge. What am I supposed to say to myself? What am I supposed to do?
JSF. You either want it or you don't.....And I mean really want it....not just say you want it. When you really want it you will be able to resist the junk food.....or eat it in moderation.0 -
Self control.
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This is your journey, not his.
Be proud of yourself for staying away from his junk.
I buy junk food for my husband, I do not touch it, it is his!
( It works for me)0 -
This, if you can fit it into your daily allowance it will have no impact on your overall diet.
or...dont eat it
Allow yourself to work it into your day...in my opinion giving yourself permission to have a serving of something takes away that obsessive thinking about it as if you will never have it again.
Weigh a serving on your food scale and log it...enjoy and move on.
Relationship wise, if its bothering you that much then you need to talk with him. As you lose more and more weight you will most likely see him in a different light and end up breaking up with him if he doesn't jump on board. Might as well get it over with now.0 -
Dump him. You're not compatible. Find someone who is more interested in a healthy lifestyle. It's a lot easier when (as a couple) you can work together as a cohesive unit to achieve a common goal. My fiancé and I were both very overweight when we started dating. He is stronger at maintaining healthy eating habits and I am more motivated to work out (harder and more often). We are able to use our own individual strengths to balance out each others' weaknesses. I know I absolutely CANNOT have junk food in our house; I WILL eat it. I don't have the discipline to just walk away...my inner fat kid will take over every single time without fail.0
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I have a wife that likes to buy junk food and bake a lot of sweets. I get onto her about it but it's honestly not even worth the fight. When she complains that she wants to lose weight I use the opportunity to tell her that she needs to quit eating like **** if she wants results. She's not fat at all but she has been in better shape in the past.
I am pretty good about staying away from it unless I've planned a cheat because I gain weight sooooooooo much faster than anyone that I've ever met. Eating a couple bad meals has disastrous results for me so it makes it easier to stay away.0 -
Yep mine is a sugar addict!! Come Friday night our cupboards are full of chocolate, cake, icecream, crisps etc! He is such a feeder too and keeps telling me I deserve a day off
He is really supportive but in his opinion I don't need to lose weight so tries to feed me up!0 -
self control, I have none when there is a lot of temptation around. I would ask him to put his stuff in another place where it is not right in front of my face. If you can compromise it will work. My husband use to order pizza when I first started losing weight. He would go back in the computer room or downstairs to eat it. He was very supportive. But like the others have said, he should be able to eat what he wants. I have my snacks in a different place and it works for us.0
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Keep his snacks somewhere in a cabinet in the kitchen that you don't use all the time (like on top of the fridge in a cabinet, or somewhere down below). Make sure he knows where they are, but by not having them out right in front of you all the time when you're in the kitchen, you may be less tempted to grab a handful of something when you're in there. I know I do that... if we get chocolate or chips or something, I keep it in a cabinet, and when it's not out in plain sight, I don't eat it unless I actually have the calories for a snack and make a conscious decision as to what I want to eat, and how much of it I'm going to weigh out and eat.0
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Um, YES!
First two weeks of getting back on the portion control and watching what we eat I would come to break at catch him with a soda and donuts/cake or something. Im like WTH??? YOu want to do this 'together' without the 'together' part. I am so confused. You want to portion my food on my plate and watch what I eat, but not do the same??? He is a large man, so he does require an extra snack(I buy him bars/healthier crackers/healthier chips or something to help with the extra calories) He also eats more than me, thats okay. But dont eat donuts and drink soda in front of me. Thats like lighting up a cigarette infront of someone who decided to stop smoking yesterday.
As far assnacks at home, I keep cheeses, crackers and little things in the house for us, and I love to snack while we are cooking (Half the reason is because my toddler cant wait for supper because daycare stops feeding thing to early) and I am like honey, want some cheese? Want some crackers to hold you over? Of course he isnt, because he is to busy drinking soda and eating powered donuts on his last break. I offered to buy him a huge container of nuts and I always get a no. *le sigh*0 -
you can totally stop - if you want to!
tell yourself whatever you need to but just stay away from it...
I like to tell myself - that's going to make me sick, die of cancer, diabetes or some other fun disease.
Honestly it's easy because most things with Carbs give me major tummy issues - you can tell yourself that.
Willpower is a muscle that needs to be exercised/flexed.
You CAN do anything you set your mind to!!!
If you say "I can't" you'll be right.
If you say "I can" - you'll also be right.
You can't force him to change his habits but maybe after seeing your successful weight loss and lifestyle change he might want to give it a try too... You can't make him though - he's got to come around to it himself.0 -
I buy junk food for my boyfriend who can eat anything and everything he wants. Its my responsibility to say no to it not his reasonability to not have it in the house. Sometimes I have some, sometimes I don't BUT its always my decision and my accountability.0
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Yes, he buys a lot of it. And fast food.
I told him to, though. My diet shouldn't change his eating. He likes to eat that crap and doesn't care about his health. No reason he should give it up because I no longer swallow it.
I don't eat it because I don't want to. It don't just want a thin body - I want a healthy one.
Asking other people to change because you can't isn't really fair, KWIM?0 -
Learn some self control.0
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[warning: I'm going to give a brutal opinion. Here be dragons]
Is it REALLY that hard to NOT eat something that doesn't fit whatever program you're on?
I always get a laugh out if threads like this. YOUR health is YOUR issue, not your partner's. If you don't want to eat the chips, cookies, whatever food is on your "do not devour" list, don't eat it. If you do, that's your problem. Trying to foist your own lack of control is what you eat onto your purported loved ones is simply avoidance of your own responsibility in your eating.
My wife forever buys things I used to eat regularly, two years on in my weight loss and fitness then acts surprised when I don't eat them - even after telling her repeatedly that I'm not going to as if it's some personal vendetta against her.
Grow up and take responsibility for your actions.
^^^^^This. My 6', 180 lb husband who runs 15 miles a week, can bring in whatever he wants. He's not seriously into junk, and even before I started my lifestyle change we didn't keep alot of it in the house. But, my oldest daughter likes to bake. Brownies, cookies, etc. I either don't eat it, or work it into my calories.
This is a YOU problem, not a boyfriend problem.0 -
your goal doesnt mean it is your SO's goal0
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Self-control is a learned behavior. I would use this as a challenge to myself. Challenge yourself to making good decisions, challenge yourself to only having 1 piece of whatever, and when you meet your challenge, pay yourself. Put a dollar away when you say no to the cookie, give yourself a few bucks when you have a day of good decisions, and at the end of a 3 months, go buy yourself some new clothes for the rocking body you have.
Or like others have said, fit it in. You don't have to log the day of. You can log in advance, so you make sure that you can fit everything into a day.
When you mess up, don't let that be an excuse to go on a binge, but the next time, make a better decision. You will be much better off, if you can try to learn to control this behavior.
I understand, my family is not on any type of diet, and when I go to visit on the weekends, I either bring my own food and allow myself a small splurge, or I shave down calories consumed during the week to allot for the extra I'm going to eat at my grandparent's house.
This week, my food logging has to be perfect, because we're going to the state fair, and yes, I am going to indulge in every type of food possible. It's one day, so I'm not going to feel bad about going over my calories (it's also exercise because you're walking all day). I also plan on getting up early that morning to workout, so it won't be as bad as previous years.
If you are planning to make this long term, the sooner you try to reconcile that food is going to pop up in front of you that you are trying to avoid, the better prepared you will be to face them and say no. My office is forever having food, cookies, candy, donuts, cakes, you name it, it's here. And I found myself backsliding for about month (this is a new job, my old place wasn't bad like this), but I had to wake myself up and say "stop." I know it's easier said than done, but nothing worth having comes easy. And your health is definitely worth it.0
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