My Boyfriends dog is number one, I am number two.

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  • CollieFit
    CollieFit Posts: 1,683 Member
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    Yeah, you're not over-reacting at all! I'd say he's probably taking the wimps way out of ending your relationship. Instead of just telling you he wants it over, he's trying to irritate you enough to break it off with him. Just my opinion.. but that's what it looks like to an outsider.

    That's my suspicion too. I think if you give him an ultimatum, it's not looking good that it'll be you over the dog.
  • TheBitSlinger
    TheBitSlinger Posts: 621 Member
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    I think the boyfriend may be cheating on his dog.
  • footiechick82
    footiechick82 Posts: 1,203 Member
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    Being a dog owner and having my last dog be the centre of my universe, it's hard to not have your dog around all the time. My ex use to get super mad when I cuddled with Hailey (was her name) on the couch. However, he never wanted to cuddle with me anyway! He always sat on the OTHER couch. In bed, I would get him to spoon me and I would spoon her. Or, she would just sleep beside me and sometimes end up between the two of us. I purposely bought a king size bed so he would stop complaining that the bed was too small to have her in it. There was no way in hell Hailey was coming second to my relationship. She came first and she showed me love and affection... she was like my kid.

    Now, I have a new dog named Troy. My ex got pissed when I adopted him because, like your boyfriend, he comes first. He is MY responsibility and I need to take care of him. He's a little snuggle bug and loves to be close.

    The one thing I drew the line on was intimacy with the dog in the room, yeah, it's kinda mean to kick out the dog, but that's just not cool. My last dog would sit there and the dog I have now would lick you. So... it's best they are not in the room. If THAT is why the intimacy is getting rare to none, I would just say "Listen, it's an hour (or whatever), give the dog some treats and when we're done the dog can come back in and cuddle!" It's a fair trade off.

    Either way, the dog will come first for a long time. If I was you and this is from experience, I would start to adopt the dog as your own too and try to treat it as 'our' dog and not just 'his' dog... he will resent you if you don't... I know I did.
  • CollieFit
    CollieFit Posts: 1,683 Member
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    LOL just realised how old this thread is. My bad.
  • SkinnyFatAlbert
    SkinnyFatAlbert Posts: 482 Member
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    Just break up.
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
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    I really like my boyfriend, and I really love his dog. He adopted him after a few months into us dating. The dog is affectionate and adorable. I have grown rather attached to him. The actual problem is how this man lets the dog dominate his entire life, which is ruining our relationship. He cannot spend one night without it. We cannot go on trips where the dog cannot stay, and even if we do, we cannot stay long because we have to "get back" -- same with even short social gatherings. Moreover, he lets the dog sleep wherever it wants (in between us in his bed), and he insists that it is "cute" or "funny" that the dog seeks affection during and after we do the dirty. I can even count on one hand how many times we've been intimate without the dog in the room, which is now disgusting me as I write this. It has ruined the intimacy level in our relationship, since he believes that shutting the dog out of the bedroom is also cruel. He will often lie around kissing, stroking and petting the dog (even lying on the floor with it) in front of me while we spend time together, but refuses to give me the same affection (he was very loving at the start of our relationship, however). It is really slowly starting to upset me and may even drive me to a breaking point. I have said little things like - "I would like to lay next to my boyfriend" or, "I never sleep at your place with the dog in the bed". Nothing. Am I crazy and seeing things? Does he have a problem or do I? I'm smart enough to know that there's something wrong with this picture at this point and have been giving him the benefit of the doubt to come around due to his redeeming qualities, but on the same end I feel stupid for feeling this way, as if I am overreacting.

    What kind of dog is it?

    The January 2011 kind. I'm guessing since she didn't respond that August, she probably won't answer now, either. :tongue:
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
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    Mans best friend

    pPgwlXB.gif

    THIS IS EPIC.

    +1!
  • jamiem1102
    jamiem1102 Posts: 1,196 Member
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    It sounds like you've only been passive aggressive with him. If he's oblivious to that sort of thing, then he doesn't know there's a problem. I suggest having a talk with him BEFORE you blow up, because then it's going to seem as though it's coming from nowhere. *shrug*
  • Mslmesq
    Mslmesq Posts: 1,001 Member
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    Just break up.

    I'm sure they did break up....um, like 3 years ago!

    And who revived this thread and why? :noway:
  • SkinnyFatAlbert
    SkinnyFatAlbert Posts: 482 Member
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    Just break up.

    I'm sure they did break up....um, like 3 years ago!

    And who revived this thread and why? :noway:

    Clearly she was nuts. Crazy girl syndrome. She probably revived her own thread!
  • taiyola
    taiyola Posts: 964 Member
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    Firstly, I think him thinking shutting the dog out of the room is cruel, is odd. I am very close to my dog... but I wouldn't have him around whilst doing the deed! That is definitely an issue. He should give you the attention you want and need.

    Secondly, him not wanting to leave the dog for 24 hours alone isn't weird. You don't get a dog to then leave it at home all weekend whilst you go on trips. Unless someone else is there to look after the dog, then it's cruel. Is it meant to hold in it's toilet business all day long because you want to go out?! Getting a dog is a huge commitment. In that respect, I think you are missing the point and are being selfish. The RSPCA can get involved if you leave your pet alone for days on end.
  • Hornsby
    Hornsby Posts: 10,322 Member
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    My EX wife used to say the same thing about my dog.

    I used to tell her....

    "Well, if I put both of you in the trunk and drove around in 100 degree weather, which one of you will be happy to see me when I pop the trunk?"

    Divorce was final just over 3 years ago....

    lol
  • beckhole69
    beckhole69 Posts: 69 Member
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    I smooch all over my cat. She really is cuter than any guy. As long as your boyfriend isn't into bestiality....
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,473 Member
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    it is what it is.
    go get a cat
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
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    So two years later did them come to a compromise and is the dog filming now?
  • RivenV
    RivenV Posts: 1,667 Member
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    fcc.gif
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
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    I am pretty obsessive about my dog as well. He even has a winter coat and a rain coat. I let my mother keep the dog for a few months because I was working a lot, and she has taken it to a whole new level. She even takes him with her when she and my father go to their favorite restaurant---an upper scale restaurant that certainly does not allow dogs. They are regulars, and my dad pays them extra money so they can bring the dog in. It's crazy! However, my dog is a small toy poodle, and he is very well behaved. I am all for treating the dog like a child, but my mother is out of her mind with these antics. lol. However, I have never kept the dog in the room while I was having sex. That would just be too weird for me.
  • patrickblo13
    patrickblo13 Posts: 831 Member
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    Here's your answer...your boyfriend locks you and the dog in a room for a couple hours...let's see who is happy to see him when he opens the door
  • bluefox9er
    bluefox9er Posts: 2,917 Member
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    I really like my boyfriend, and I really love his dog. He adopted him after a few months into us dating. The dog is affectionate and adorable. I have grown rather attached to him. The actual problem is how this man lets the dog dominate his entire life, which is ruining our relationship. He cannot spend one night without it. We cannot go on trips where the dog cannot stay, and even if we do, we cannot stay long because we have to "get back" -- same with even short social gatherings. Moreover, he lets the dog sleep wherever it wants (in between us in his bed), and he insists that it is "cute" or "funny" that the dog seeks affection during and after we do the dirty. I can even count on one hand how many times we've been intimate without the dog in the room, which is now disgusting me as I write this. It has ruined the intimacy level in our relationship, since he believes that shutting the dog out of the bedroom is also cruel. He will often lie around kissing, stroking and petting the dog (even lying on the floor with it) in front of me while we spend time together, but refuses to give me the same affection (he was very loving at the start of our relationship, however). It is really slowly starting to upset me and may even drive me to a breaking point. I have said little things like - "I would like to lay next to my boyfriend" or, "I never sleep at your place with the dog in the bed". Nothing. Am I crazy and seeing things? Does he have a problem or do I? I'm smart enough to know that there's something wrong with this picture at this point and have been giving him the benefit of the doubt to come around due to his redeeming qualities, but on the same end I feel stupid for feeling this way, as if I am overreacting.

    Dump this idiot. TODAY.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
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    Yeah....it is time to have a chat with him about his creepy attraction to his dog and his neglect of you.

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