Fit For Future Families - March 2011

Jessica_Lo

Yeah I'm thinking just because of the stuff they will put me on anyway. OoOoO didn't think about the bloating. That's whats been going on!! Geez!!

epa422

My name is Erica, and I have an addiction to buying exercise DVDs. Someone stop me! Must walk away from ebay...

evileene

Hi I'm new here--originally started an account almost a year ago and never used it. I'm a 36 year old Navy wife, stepmom to an adorable almost 7 year old boy and mom to a little girl about to turn 3. I had made a deal with the hubs that we'd both get down to a healthy weight and then start TTC--and then we found out he was going to be gone for over a year (deploying) and decided not to wait. We got pregnant, and I miscarried last week. We've been told to wait at least 2 cycles before trying again, so in the meantime, I'm trying to drop some weight and get myself in better shape before we start trying. Here's hoping I can get down to 185--or 180!--and that things go quickly. I feel the clock ticking, the hubs will be leaving in October.

Oh, I'm Danielle too, but I answer to Dani, and even to Evil (old nickname, from when I used to game all the time, hence the sn--I promise, I'm not REALLY evil *grins*) Oh, I thought I saw someone mention BoBB earlier too--if you found that interesting, check out Orgasmic Birth. We're planning on a home (hotel) birth with midwife--or possibly even a home birth, unassisted. Military won't let midwives actually assist on base.

Jessica_Lo

Daniella what is the orgasmic birth about. I checked out the website but it doesn't give many details unless you order the video.

epa422

Welcome Dani! I'm sorry for your loss. I hope that you don't have to wait too long to get pregnant again.

evileene

Jessica, I think you can view it through Amazon on demand or something like that? I didn't know there even was such a thing, but someone told me that. It's about basically the idea that birth can be pleasurable, that it's not all about pain and fear and stuff. There were home births, there were hospital births--they were saying you're not really guaranteed to have an actual orgasm while giving birth but that it is possible and that the hormones released during and after birth are stronger than even after orgasm. It was a fascinating show. I was super jealous of the one couple. They lived out in a more rural area, it looked like, and she labored and birthed outside, on their back porch. It was beautiful. But then, I'm a crazy hippie

Thank you, Erica. I bled for over a week before they finally told me my levels were dropping and it didn't look good. I miscarried that night. I had a week to say goodbye to my Bean though, and I have almost a month's worth of journals to him or her, so it helped. I'm sad but calm now, and looking towards the future.

Jessica_Lo

Yeah I've never heard of it. I thought "orgasm" in the title was metaphorical. It scares me though to not be in a hospital but I'm thinking thats what society wants you to think. I read a little bit and it was enlightening what they say about the increase in c sections and inductions. I always thought...just let the doctor induce you and deliver early. I was wrong.

btw...sorry about your loss. I can't even imagine dealing with that. My heart goes out to you.....

evileene

Jessica--homebirth is absolutely not for everyone. The best thing anyone can do is research for themselves and see what THEY are comfortable with. I know a lot of people I know are freaked that I would like to give birth unassisted--again, something that is NOT for everyone. There are some terrific books out there on the subject, though. I loved Henci Goer's The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth. And anything by Ina May Gaskin makes me swoon.

Jessica_Lo

Yeah I don't think I could do it but I want to have the knowledge to at least know whats going on this time. I was so young with my boys I just did what the docs told me to do with out knowing the affects or asking questions. I want to do this right this time!!! I'll research those books! Thanks!

PS nothing wrong with being a hippie.

fitterpam

Hye gusy - will check back later, what a day so far!! Yikes! Anyways appointment went well. All of our bloodwork from Sept has expired so we need to do it all again...yippee. At least we'll know if there's a difference in the hormones, thyroid levels, sugar since starting to see her. I had a APH (I think or APM) done today which will tell her what levels of the hormones I need to be given so I don't get sick and get enough to do what they need to do.

She was not happy with DH's results. His official diagnosis is Sever Hypoazoospermia or something like that - basically meaning he doesn't make the little guys (there wasn't enough to even get a reliable morphology/motility reading) and brought up the idea of donor sperm as a back up. I'd read something in the waiting room about a vial costing up to $600 (which I thought was reasonable - hey when it's going to cost $12K, might as well do what you can right) and he immediately said no which I was surprised about. By the time she brought it up, he'd warmed up a little more (we were going to adopt - this would be similar except with the pregnancy and no legal hassles.) It's kind of up to us now if we want to keep going with that or just go with what we have - he's also pretty adament that since we have been so open with people about the process, this could be one piece of the puzzle we don't share with many people and I completely understand that - our kids don't need that kind of judgement if we can help it. We have a counselling session set for next week and then have to deliver our verdict at our next appt (Ap 7) Between now and then we have to finish up the testing and the counselling, I have to get my results from my last yearly exam. Then we get a tour of the facility and she said it would only be a cycle and a half at most for the first round. So if my AF shows on Ap 6-8 like it's supposed to.......we could be going through the procedure mid May. Also the cost is way less than I thought - all in it'd be around $10K.......that's compared to the $20K I've been telling myself to prepare to part with....

kcurtis05

Hi Everyone! Welcome to our new comers! I'm glad to see new faces and hear all your stories. And Welcome back Alisa and Jalara!
(SORRY FOR THE LONG POST)
Laurn~ I hope you do well with the clomid. I have not used anything meds at this point, so I don't know first hand, but from what I have heard It can make you a bit whacky. I hope it doesn't affect you negatively and helps with the baby making process.

Danielle~ I'm extremely sorry for your loss. ((Hugs)) I hope you regulate soon! I've been having a problem regulating after BC for over a year now....I think I'm close.

Jessica~ IVF in April! That's soon! Hope the wait in a quick and stress-free. I would love twin!

Pam~ I hope your appointment went well! What's the word?

Ash~ ((HUGS)) Enjoy your break.

Karen- Fingers crossed for that "super egg." And I'm very sorry to hear about your cousin. She's in my prayers.

Erica~Great workout! And all this talk about FL makes me want to take off again! UGGH winter!! Put down the mouse and step away from the ebay! LOL J/K have fun!

Jalara~ I'm very sorry to hear that! I can only imagine the emotional rollercoaster! We are here for you! ((HUGS)) Great idea, making cycle goals! And awesome loss! I'm so happy you are back!

Katie~ Yay right side! Maybe that's what needed to happen, a change for the better!? Fingers crossed for Monday! Hope you have been enjoying your week of relaxation!

ALISA!!!~ Glad to see you are back busy lady! Glad you are adjusting to "single mom" life. Hope you find your strength, balance, and routine soon. You can do it! Hope your hubby stays safe while he's away.

Nichole~ Nice to see/hear your trip went well (except for extra snow)! Don't worry too much about the lbs I'm sure they were worth it! It will take a bit to get back in routine, believe me. After my HI cruise with all you can eat, my body thought it needed to eat everything that I saw! What are your thoughts on kickboxing, I have always wanted to try it but just not sure if I would like it. 2 hours of Zumba=Love it!

Dani~ I saw that dateline special on orgasmic birth on youtube. That was SO interesting! Never heard of that before! Nothing wrong with a little hippie in you! There is a woman on the Pregnancy board that is on her 11th child and does home births. I am defiantly a hospital girl, because my mom is a retired labor and delivery nurse. So I have heard about all the good, bad, and the ugly. I would want to know if anything bad does happen I am in a place where it can be addressed very quickly.

AFM(As for me<---for you Jessica)~ I've been super busy at work, till today. Now the clock is not moving at all!!
Food-wise~ I've been doing, really, pretty well. Trying to stay under my cals a bit. I love the FOODUCATE app! I have been scanning everything I have and seeing what type of great it gets. I was actually surprised at quite a few things that I eat on a regular basis. It's amazing I have lost anything at all.
Exercise-wise~ Went to zumba last night and there were a ton of newbies. It was great to have a full class (30 people vs. 15-20 regularly) BUT it turned the room into a complete sauna! The mirrors were completely fogged, floor was set and slippery, and I was drenched! I just thought of it as getting rid of a little extra water that I needed to get rid of anyways and it felt great! Going again tonight. I'm very curious to see how many will come tonight. Thursday nights are usually packed as it is.... I think I'll need to bring a towel. :bigsmile:
BDing(Baby Dancing)-wise~ I have been using my Clear Blue Easy Monitor and still at "low." I have looked up the SMEP(sperm meets egg plan) and I think we are going to try that method this month and cross our fingers.

epa422

Pam, I'm glad you got some concrete information today. That's very exciting!

Way to go with the Zumba, Kim! They're doing a Zumbathon here next weekend, but I think I might die if I tried it for two hours. :laugh:

fitterpam

Kim - glad you like the Fooducate app. I thought it was so neat but I have to wait for it to come out for Android.....

AFM - tonight is Aquafit Looking forward to it. One of my swim buddies is down for the week with pneumonia - thank goodness I had a backup .... LOL Made some really good choices today. Looking forward to the rest of my evening.....tomorrow's a busy day at work and then it's the weekend, although I'll probably get in some hours then. Today is warm out - it was +5 degrees C here and we've had about 4 inches of snow melt today. I might also get a walk in. As for the news, DH and I talked it over and I think we're going to agree to the donor sperm. She said we could either try his the first round (if there are any that are quality enough, they aren't sure and there have been concerns in the past) and then the donor in subsequent or she could just do it and not tell us which they were. I kinda see the reasons for both - I think right now we're looking at option A, but option B might result in a more viable pregnancy in the first shot. Ahhhhhhhhhhh decisions!!!!

kah78

Kim - glad you like the Fooducate app. I thought it was so neat but I have to wait for it to come out for Android.....

AFM - tonight is Aquafit Looking forward to it. One of my swim buddies is down for the week with pneumonia - thank goodness I had a backup .... LOL Made some really good choices today. Looking forward to the rest of my evening.....tomorrow's a busy day at work and then it's the weekend, although I'll probably get in some hours then. Today is warm out - it was +5 degrees C here and we've had about 4 inches of snow melt today. I might also get a walk in. As for the news, DH and I talked it over and I think we're going to agree to the donor sperm. She said we could either try his the first round (if there are any that are quality enough, they aren't sure and there have been concerns in the past) and then the donor in subsequent or she could just do it and not tell us which they were. I kinda see the reasons for both - I think right now we're looking at option A, but option B might result in a more viable pregnancy in the first shot. Ahhhhhhhhhhh decisions!!!!

Oooo--the do it and not tell you approach--I kinda like that! Or just take his and the donor sperm, mix em up (can they do that?) and then let them all go in together and figure it out for themselves. I had never thought about that before. I wonder if there would be comfort in not knowing. I dunno. Good luck with the decision. I think it's one of those cases where they are both right answers---you just have to decide which "right" you want to go with.

I blew my calorie count with an alcoholic beverage this evening. Boo. Could have been worse, I guess. The signs are pointing towards starting to spot, so I'm just cruising along for the ride now this cycle. I'd love to get off this rollercoaster sometime. (Wouldn't we all!)

fitterpam

There would be no mixing it up unfortunatley (I did at one time today call it the milkshake daddy....LOL) IVF with ICSI means each egg is individually "fertilized". He's leaning to the second option, I'm kinda leaning towards the first.....ahhhhhhhhhh

And to top it off, I'm not good at the whole secret thing. It just hit me that if we decide to use the donor sperm that we will most likely have to keep the secret from a lot of people. I was going to tell a few girl friends....but now...I'm thinking I don't. I don't want it to come out 10 years from now......DANG IT!!! We've decided not to tell anyone (excpet obvisouly you guys) until we've had the counselling session (hence the required counselling session) to work out our thoughts and even then only a few people, if that...I might have become really good at keeping this a secret.

Oh and I just got a call that aquafit is not even being held tonight so booo, now I'm over on cals....LOL Maybe hubs and I can take the dogs for a walk.

epa422

That's a really tough call, Pam. I may have mentioned before that my husband was previously married. His first wife died of cancer, but before she began treatment, they froze three embryos. I am so not ok with using those. If we had to use donor eggs, I would definitely want them from a stranger. That idea doesn't bother me as much. Perhaps he's going with whatever gives you guys the best shot for the lowest cost. Very practical... but it's definitely something you'll have to work through.

fitterpam

Sorry for hogging the board guys, but I'm such a rollercoaster tonight (with you there Karen!!! I want to get off!!!) Erica If the donor sperm was someone we knew I wouldn't be okay with it.....forget his feelings on that topic, it's just not up for discussion LOL. I know who we're definitely NOT telling at this point. I think we're just going to keep it to ourselves. If it really doesn't matter where we get our child from (our adoption mantra), that child will be ours, then what does it matter where the genetic material comes from. And besides, I don`t even know if we`re going to do it that way yet (although it will mean a higher chance the first round). The second round is about a quarter of the cost though all in so not too bad (although if I don`t have to pay it, I would prefer not to)......

I`m going for a walk, my mood`s been swinging so much tonight, I couldn`t finish my dinner. All I can stomach the thought of is junk...think I`m going to have to give in and write this week off Talk about emotional eating....at least we`re not alone in that department!

kt4au

Pam – I think that I would try DH first and then the donor but I think the counseling will help with the decision. Sorry about Aquafit…you gotta hate when a plan fails

Dani - I love the thought of the Orgasmic birth but when I told DH about that he had that look on his face like he was going to take me to the place where everyone wears white and the walls are padded It took all I had to talk him into doing a natural birth. Though I am not sure how he has much say so in whether I get drugs or not. But he said it was his hand that would be broken.

Jessica - My house is for sale...it is only 45 mins away

Erica - as long as you are using those DVDs, you at least have a healthy habit!

Alisa - Glad you are back

Nichole - Vacation weight is usually the easiest to get off. Once you go back to eating a little healthier.

Kim – the hotter the room, the more calories you burn!

Karen – Ask your doctor about Femara…does the same as Clomid but without the harsh side effects. Your body may not be adjusting to the Clomid correctly. If you do get, make sure you go to the Femara website and print the coupon. It makes it only $10 instead of like $200.

AFM – Last night I got a call and had to go stay at my neighbor’s house so she could go have her baby. She has a 5 year old girl and a 2 ½ year old boy who has severe epilepsy caused by a chromosome disorder. I have stayed with the girl before but never the boy. I was a little nervous but it was fine. The only thing was that his feeding tube alarm went off and I had to inject his meds. They probably got to the hospital at about 11:30pm and he was born at about 1am. That is about the quickest labor I have ever heard of. I was doing good all day yesterday but when I was at their house I found some BBQ Fritos!!! I can’t resist. Today was really good. I had a great workout and I ate pretty well. I have been reading The Fertility Diet and it has some pretty interesting info in it. Their main point, so far, is to replace a lot of your animal protein with plant protein, so I went to Target and stocked up.

I am hoping for at least a pound drop for the week tomorrow but we will see. DH has been dropping the pounds and all he has been doing is drinking a ton of water. He says that water is all you have to do. It just flushes everything you eat out. I think it might only work for him.

Other news, we may be moving whether we sell our house or not. DH got an email about a potential job and he decided he would apply. He talked to the recruit and they really want someone immediately but they were so impressed with his resume that they are willing to wait until we can move. It is almost a $15,000 increase and our cost of living would go down. DH was excited and was like, now we can grow our savings and my thought was now I will be able to afford IVF if I have to. It is amazing how much this controls my life. I really have to relax more.

Hope you all have a good night!

epa422

Katie, that sounds like quite the night. I'm glad it went smoothly.

Tell your husband it only works if you're a man. My husband is skinny. It's very annoying. He doesn't do anything and he eats candy all day at work. They gave everyone pedometers. Last week, he walked 7 miles in 4 hours. And that was a slow day. (He's a store manager for Walgreens.) I guess we now know why he's so skinny and can eat whatever he wants.

Pam, you're not hogging the board. Whatever you decide will be perfect for your family and that is all that matters.

jalara

Wow! So much to catch up on in such a short time!

First of all, thanks for the warm welcome back!

Pam - I'm sorry about the results, but I think it's good that you have options. I'm not sure if I could keep the donor sperm a secret for life, but I guess they know what they're doing, and that's why counselling is mandatory. Also, I want to commend you on going for a walk to deal with your own emotions - that's a really healthy coping technique!

Alisa - welcome back! I came back 2 days ago - nice to see you!

Kah - about the white flour - what is it you are having trouble giving up? I'm a celiac (no gluten) so I may be able to help you find great alternatives.

kcurtis - you make me smile - so glad to be back! And I highly recommend the cycle goals - it's working so far!

Me - didn't make it to the gym the last two days, but I plan to tomorrow for sure. I had a midterm today that got more complicated by a flat tire I got on my way there...yay. Then we had dinner with friends and that didn't go so well.

Another friend expecting and it happens, I know it happens. Normally it happens and I find out via Facebook. No, not this time. This time it was the gf that I was confiding in, that knew we've been trying, and we were sharing. Tonight at dinner she announced that she 12 weeks along. I jumped up and screamed and hugged her - they really deserve to have as many children as they can - they are GREAT parents. THEN she asked (in front of our friends) if I had anything I'd like to share too. She didn't mean anything by it, she's a super sweetheart and was caught up in the moment. I told her we'd talk privately later, and then started asking her questions about the new baby. But I wish she had warned me, because I nearly started crying, and DH excused himself to the washroom.

On the way home we stopped at the store for icecream. After I ate it (read my feelings), I totally broke down, and now I have a belly ache, so I'm going to bed.

Tomorrow is a new day, right?

Nite all!

fitterpam

Katie - fingers crossed on this new job. It sounds like it would make your lives much more comfortable

Jalara - what an unfortunate night I'm sorry that you had that kind of experience....I had quite a few of those early on and they sucked in such a big way. Sometimes well-meaning people can be the ones that do the most harm and she must be feeling terrible.

DH and I talked last night. We're going to be going with his and then doing the don't tell us route. All of the embryos will be done at once and I'm not sure yet how I feel about not using all of them - not at once, obviously, but over time. The biggest deciding factor for me is I don't want my DH to be in a position where everyone says the baby looks "just like him". Sometimes people do that even if the baby doesn't and I think that might kill him. I still think we're in a position that it would be a secret - I don't think it would be fair to him or the baby, but maybe counselling will change that. My thought right now is that I can't untell anyone, but will still have an opportunity to tell them in a week, so for now, it's going to be a secret.

OMG (Just woke up to the news about the earthquake). Hope those in NZ - History, and others - won't get hit too hard. Also praying that everyone on the west coast stays safe (although I hear the tsunami advisory in BC is for 50cm waves during low tide, but still.......

kah78

Ugh Jalara--some people, even well intentioned say such bone-headed things, don't they. Think before you speak people--you just don't know when an innocent comment will send someone into a downward spiral. (I know I'm preaching to the choir here, forgive me.) And if you are anything like me, the Clomid is probably only helping the emotionality.

Celiac's- that's how this all started--I don't have it, but I know several people who do, so I wanted to do it as an awareness exercise for myself, and as a way to try to limit my intake of cookies, cakes, etc. I'm reading labels, but since it's not a GI issue for me, I'm not going to worry if something slips by me, and I have what I call the "hospitality" clause in my agreement with myself--it basically just means that if I'm eating over at someone's house, and they are serving Lasagne or something, and I don't have other options, I'm eating the Lasagne rather than make a big deal out of not eating it--again, since it's not a GI issue for me. Right now, I'm just working through the initial "withdrawal", I think. I haven't given up sugar too, so I'm pretty sure I'm just dealing with a psychological "I want what I can't have" thing. And, on top of that, the Clomid makes me so emotional, and I should start spotting in the next day or so if the pattern remains constant, so I'm just ripe for emotional eating as it is. Last night though, I made baked chicken tenders, and instead of bread crumbs for the coating, I used rice chex that I had in the pantry. I was proud of myself for thinking of that. Haha. It also gives me an excuse to make the flourless chocolate cake recipe that I made a few weeks ago. Yummmmm.

Pam--hugs as you make this decision. Welcome to the emotional eating club--I think there are several of us living on that island right now. I'm trying to swim off. I was thinking more about the donor issue last night. I would probably be in the "I don't want to know which one you used" category, I think. Then it's not a "secret" that I would have to keep--I honestly wouldn't know. I'm all about putting the weight of keeping that secret on the doctor. That's just me though--I hate keeping secrets.

KT-I've asked about Femara--doc wasn't comfortable doing it--said it was an off-label use of the medication. Boo on her. I'll ask when we go to the RE--maybe they will be more enlightened, and willing to try it before we move to more "extreme" measures.

Happy Friday to everyone. Pray for Japan right now--have you heard about the Tsunami that hit in the last hour--devastating--and no warning.

Jessica_Lo

Kim....THANKS! I was wondering what AFM was.

Katie...I would love to buy your house. We're not ready yet though. I have to wait for my sons to finish school. I wouldn't want to move them at this point.

(disclaimer...since you both have K's in your name...I'm guessing from the rest of the posts which one is Kim and which one is Katie)

Pam....So many decisions. I have to go through all the bloodwork again too but only because we want to do the refund program so they require it. :ohwell: How is your program only 10k? How many cycles do you get? Do you get refunded? Ours is 20K plus we have to pay for anestesia and meds on top of that. We get 6 cycles out of that and guaranteed to take a baby home from hospital or we get 70% back. Chances are we will get pregnant really easy since we have no issues but because it's so much money we just decided to go all in. If we don't get pregnant or god forbid something happens during the pregnancy we would be devastated and we wouldn't have the money to do it again. Tough decision on the donor sperm and I know mainly it's a mental game. All in all you have the right attitude with the adoption mantra and this is really the same thing. It will be your husbands kid no matter what the DNA says. I agree about not telling. I don't think you should. It gives people something else to know thats none of their business. For example...my dad (step dad technically) married my mom with 3 kids. I was 2 at the time my sister 4 and my bro 6. He's the only dad we've ever known...adopted us and everything. So my sister has blue eyes and over the weekend we were at her daughters bday party and a new friend of hers was there who we had not met and as soon as she saw my dad she told my sister...OMG that's where you get your eyes from. You look like your dad. We all giggled and agreed and carried on. Now we could have stopped her and told her the truth...but for what? Who cares? He is my dad. Our dad. You'll have moments like this and you will just laugh inside and it will make you happy. Good luck and keep us posted. Mid May sounds like you will have your first round at the same time I will!! :happy:

Jessica_Lo

Jalara...I can't tell you how many moments I've had like that. I have so many friends that have gotten pregnant in the last 2 years. Most by surprise. Now it's a little different with me because theres no way I will get a surprise but my hubby and I had to wait to save the money to do IVF and in the meantime the population increased around us. I swear on the last one I felt like if one more person got prego before me my head would explode!! :flowerforyou:

epa422

Oh Jalara, that's really rough. I'm sorry. It definitely seems that it's the most well-meaning individuals who say the completely wrong thing. I hope you're feeling better today.

We had an exchange student from Japan live with us during one summer when I was young. Fortunately, she and her family are all safe. It's such a sad, sad situation for Japan.

kcurtis05

Oh Jalara, that's really rough. I'm sorry. It definitely seems that it's the most well-meaning individuals who say the completely wrong thing. I hope you're feeling better today.

We had an exchange student from Japan live with us during one summer when I was young. Fortunately, she and her family are all safe. It's such a sad, sad situation for Japan.

My family had a Japanese student as well! We called him our rent-a-jap, with his consent. :laugh: He was with us for a year in 2000. I haven't heard from him yet?

epa422

I hope he's OK, Kim. I hope you hear from him soon!

Riliye

Hi guys, I'm a newbie.

I was just diagnosed with PCOS -- I guess that explains our difficulty TTC! It feels better just to know, but like I said in a different topic, I'm kind of flailing around trying to figure out what I'm supposed to do now. Any fellow PCOS-ers (or heck, anyone really) know what foods I should be avoiding/shoving my face full of?

Also, thanks to ericaroo for showing me the thread! I'm looking forward to getting to know you guys...and I'll be here a while, since the doc recommended three months of birth control to get things regulated before we start TTC again.

Jessica_Lo

Kim...I'm sure it's chaos over there so communication can't be the best. I hope you hear from him soon. Stay positive.

Riliye...welcome. I wish I could help but I don't even know what that means. :flowerforyou:

epa422

Riliye, glad you came on over. FitterPam is one of the best sources of information, but she may not be on for a few hours. I think some of the basic diet advice is to limit carbs. If they put you on metformin, you'll probably have to limit your carbs anyway or it will make you feel ill.

Jessica, it's Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. It's a metabolic disorder that affects your metabolism and hormones and causes you to produce tons of follicles that often turn into cysts instead of eggs. I know a lot of women with it, though I don't have it.