If someone was to go onto your profile....

1356

Replies

  • KickassYas
    KickassYas Posts: 397 Member
    Creepy.... this isn't match.com

    gonna have to agree depending on the type of message and who sends it. i'm here for a very specific reason. its flattering and i'm not a hater but at the same time once again its depends.

    a simple compliment i'm good with.

    being hit on would freak me out.
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
    To everyone in this thread

    naughty.gif

    guys included.

    woot2.gif for being creepy!
  • leslielove
    leslielove Posts: 251 Member
    if anyone wants to hit on me, go for it!
  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
    It's cool with me. My reaction is usually:

    b24183756.jpg
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
    It's cool with me. My reaction is usually:

    b24183756.jpg
    flirt.gif
  • TDGee
    TDGee Posts: 2,209 Member
    schrute.jpgmj.jpg
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
    schrute.jpgmj.jpg
    secret.gif
  • 123nikki123
    123nikki123 Posts: 527
    Flattered :blushing:
  • NobodyKnows
    NobodyKnows Posts: 764 Member
    Flattered :blushing:
    nice legs
  • allroundthesun
    allroundthesun Posts: 290
    Depends. Like, on a thread about which parts of your body you like best, I linked to a picture of my butt (covered by underwear, obv.) to illustrate my point, and in that scenario I wasn't offended by the comments I received, of course; I wouldn't have linked a picture of just my butt if I wasn't cool with guys (or women) responding about my appearance. On the other hand, when I made my first post here, an introduction without a link to a photo, a guy sent me a message saying, "You look very pretty." Just that sentence, nothing else. He was going on my profile picture, I guess. I was totally creeped out and blocked him, that's sleazy to me. It's all about context.
  • JellyJaks
    JellyJaks Posts: 589 Member
    I think words like "hot" "smoking" or anything along those lines are disrespectful. I'm happily married and I'd be blowing a gasket if someone was posting words like that on my husband's profile so I"m going to assume he feels the same way about people posting them on mine. Our general rule of thumb is "if you wouldn't approve, don't do it or allow it to happen"

    If you want to give someone a compliment "Wow you're doing a really good job with your weight loss" or something to that effect is the way to go. It can't be misconstrued as a come on and doesn't carry the possibility of someone thinking you have an ulterior motive for saying it.
  • samcee
    samcee Posts: 307
    "Pretty" doesn't have a sexual connotation. "Hot," "smokin," "sexy," etc. do.
    Why do people, women especially, refuse to take a compliment without thinking there must be an ulterior motive.
    I'm 64. When I tell a lady that I think she's pretty, that's all I mean.
    Over the last decade or so, some women connote sexual meaning to that.
    Why?


    I kinda agree with this. It's more gentleman-like to say 'pretty' too! I would take that as a compliment.
  • Mad_Dog_Muscle
    Mad_Dog_Muscle Posts: 1,251 Member
    Y'all are all hot... embrace it! LOL
    Thats what makes this site great! :drinker: :drinker: :drinker:
  • vicki9168
    vicki9168 Posts: 89 Member
    I wouldnt be either flattered or offended as I know its not true.
  • TheGoktor
    TheGoktor Posts: 1,138 Member
    I'd take it as a compliment. I think sometimes compliments can give you motivation.

    I agree! Flattery implies insincerity though, so I'd definitely take it as a compliment, and not flattery! I wouldn't be at all offended, and unless someone was making it obvious they were interested in me in *that* way, I wouldn't take it as a come on (and I wouldn't be offended by that either - I'd just politely say I am not interested)! :smile:
  • MooseWizard
    MooseWizard Posts: 295 Member
    Karleyyy: It really depends with me..if it is on my profile it isn't bad, and it depends on the person saying it.
    bobbisoxx: gonna have to agree depending on the type of message and who sends it.

    "Depends on the person" translates to "whether or not I find them attractive myself," no? I mean, that is really what it comes down to isn't it? You do not mind a compliment from someone else that you yourself find "hot" but a compliment from someone less desirable gives off 'creepy' vibes. It is pretty much a minefield that I myself try not to play in.
  • TheGoktor
    TheGoktor Posts: 1,138 Member
    Karleyyy: It really depends with me..if it is on my profile it isn't bad, and it depends on the person saying it.
    bobbisoxx: gonna have to agree depending on the type of message and who sends it.

    "Depends on the person" translates to "whether or not I find them attractive myself," no? I mean, that is really what it comes down to isn't it? You do not mind a compliment from someone else that you yourself find "hot" but a compliment from someone less desirable gives off 'creepy' vibes. It is pretty much a minefield that I myself try not to play in.

    I'm not sure that's necessarily the case - it could just be that a compliment from a seemingly 'decent' person is likely to be viewed more favourably than someone who appears to be disrespectful and trashy. (I could be wrong of course!)

    Also, I think it depends on how it is phrased...

    "Wow, you're looking hot - well done, keep up the good work!" = positive feedback, complimentary, unthreatening, perfectly OK.

    Whereas...

    "Wow, you're looking hot - I've been keeping an eye on your profile and I can see the difference" = bordering on creepy and stalker-like. May be complimentary but could be odd. Could be the complimenter just isn't versed in the art of subtlety!

    However...

    "Wow, you're looking hot - I'd like to see you naked" = creepifying, wrong, disrespectful (assuming it isn't coming from your partner etc.!) and possibly not really a compliment - just a desperate attempt to get laid!

    Speaking personally, since I am not in the market for a playmate/partner/husband/whatever, a person's physical appearance has absolutely no bearing on how I view what they say to me. Ergo, a compliment is a compliment, nothing more. I'm not going to be offended if the complimenter doesn't fit my aesthetic, and by the same token, I am not going to be more flattered by the attentions of someone who does tick my theoretical boxes! Besides, I take people as I find them...and minds are far more appealing than bodies...and generally, you can't tell from someone's photo, what their minds are like! Give me an intelligent and witty mind over abs and pecs any day!
  • fteale
    fteale Posts: 5,310 Member
    Flattered of course, but slightly creeped out. I am afraid I don't add guys who message me to tell me I am hot. For a start my husband wouldn't like it.
  • robin52077
    robin52077 Posts: 4,383 Member

    It really depends with me..if it is on my profile it isn't bad, and it depends on the person saying it. If it is through message it can be kind of creepy.

    Exactly Karleyy, I agree. There was one guy who was "complimentary" on my profile a few times and I just said thanks. But then I got an inbox that said "would it be wrong of me to admit I want to jump your bones?" and I immediately de-friended and blocked. That's disgusting.
    A "wow you look hot" on your profile is FINE, but stay out of my inbox with UNSOLICITED perv comments. If someone is single and flirting hard with you, then you may take it to the inbox to further it, but NOT unsolicited from someone who you never flirted with first. It creeped me the hell out. Plus he was about 15 years older than my boyfriend. :sick:
  • JennLifts
    JennLifts Posts: 1,913 Member
    I take it as a complement and say thanks :)
  • JennLifts
    JennLifts Posts: 1,913 Member

    It really depends with me..if it is on my profile it isn't bad, and it depends on the person saying it. If it is through message it can be kind of creepy.

    Exactly Karleyy, I agree. There was one guy who was "complimentary" on my profile a few times and I just said thanks. But then I got an inbox that said "would it be wrong of me to admit I want to jump your bones?" and I immediately de-friended and blocked. That's disgusting.
    A "wow you look hot" on your profile is FINE, but stay out of my inbox with UNSOLICITED perv comments. If someone is single and flirting hard with you, then you may take it to the inbox to further it, but NOT unsolicited from someone who you never flirted with first. It creeped me the hell out. Plus he was about 15 years older than my boyfriend. :sick:


    I've had some weird inboxers too... They got blocked LOL
  • cklbrown
    cklbrown Posts: 4,696 Member
    If I could believe it, I'd be totally flattered, but I can't see a circumstance where I would believe it's true! My "separated from" husband came in this morning and said "you look great". I just rolled my eyes and said "yeah,sure". I can't take a compliment!
  • missbp
    missbp Posts: 601 Member
    I have taken it as a compliment. And, I don't think it is creepy if they message you and say it. What I do find creepy, is having a couple of teenage boys call me a MILF when I am with my kids. Creepy and quite disrespectful!

    M
  • NobodyKnows
    NobodyKnows Posts: 764 Member
    I have taken it as a compliment. And, I don't think it is creepy if they message you and say it. What I do find creepy, is having a couple of teenage boys call me a MILF when I am with my kids. Creepy and quite disrespectful!

    M

    Wow, that is completely disrespectful. My wife and daughter had a couple middle school age boys following them around Walmart. My wife figured out they were trying to take pictures or video her *kitten*. I was in a different store in the same shopping center at the time. If I would have caught them I would have flipped.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    Friends that I have here I tell them that all the time because it is true.
    I think maybe twice I sent an honest message telling a lady she looked good in a picture and both times was polite and prefaced it with a disclaimer that I wasn`t coming on to them or had any intentions.
    Kind of a shame that has to be but I am aware of issues some of my friends have had here with creeps so understand.

    I have had a few times (in the forums not a PM) where a person complimented me as far as appearance goes and did appreciate it.:smile:
  • Miss_Chievous_wechange
    Miss_Chievous_wechange Posts: 1,230 Member
    Definitely flattered!
  • TheGoktor
    TheGoktor Posts: 1,138 Member
    Friends that I have here I tell them that all the time because it is true.
    I think maybe twice I sent an honest message telling a lady she looked good in a picture and both times was polite and prefaced it with a disclaimer that I wasn`t coming on to them or had any intentions.
    Kind of a shame that has to be but I am aware of issues some of my friends have had here with creeps so understand.

    I have had a few times (in the forums not a PM) where a person complimented me as far as appearance goes and did appreciate it.:smile:

    I do think it's such a shame that very often a man cannot compliment a woman without it being misconstrued or viewed with suspicion. I suppose it works the other way around too, although one rarely hears of men saying they felt creeped out by compliments from women!

    I also think it's quite appalling when some people spoil it for everyone else by actually being creepy. What do they get out of it? Moreover, unless someone tells you, you have no way of knowing what a person's history is, so imagine how traumatic it could potentially be for someone to receive a lewd message - the effect on that person's esteem could be utterly awful.

    Maybe when all is said and done, it's just safer to keep the compliments for news feeds and forum posts where everyone can see them, after all, it seems that people don't get so worried about something which is there for all to see. I suppose there's a certain honesty to a public compliment, as opposed to a possible underhandedness to something deliberately kept private.
  • JenniferH81
    JenniferH81 Posts: 285 Member
    I don't get offended, but I also don't get hit on.

    I'm sure I'd just be flattered though. ;)
  • hllamaster
    hllamaster Posts: 137 Member
    I'm a little reserved when it comes to saying a anything other then "great job or you look great" just my make up... Many wonderful people here with a goal to look good and get heathy. There are some that I write to and would love write to on a friendship level...
  • PantalaNagaPampa
    PantalaNagaPampa Posts: 1,031 Member
    I have to say, it hasn't been an issue for me. I guess I am not at that point yet, but I'm working on it.

    I would be flattered and woul dhope others would be too, as long as it is a genuine compliment and not an attmept for anything more.

    I am always hesitant to give out complements like that to people I don't chat with regularly.
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