Who is MFP for?
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I have to ask this because, quite frankly, I dont know the answer. Something is botheriing me! I am wondering whether this site is for big people who want to be small, unfit people who want to be fit, or a mix of both. I am rather disturbed by some of the profile pictures some people have put on here as they are, quite honestly, pictures of near anorexic young woman / girls.
I strongly beleive that this site should be used as a tool to HELP acheive a healthy lifestyle through sensible eating and regular excercise. It is most useful to people who need the support of a network of friends, albeit virtual, and do not want, for whatever reason, the formal regular support from a group such as WW.
From a males point of view, and please dont take offence, a near skeletal frame on a pretty woman is not attractive. I underdstand that anorexia is an illness but I ask myself "is MFP an appropriate platform to encouragebeing so skinny".
Im sorry if this has upset anyone, it wasnt meant to, it was just meant to encourage some debate.
MFP is for anyone that needs help & accountability in achieving their goals. Quite frankly it is also partially a dating site, or at least has those overtones. That was never Mike's intention but it has partially evolved into that. People tend to make close relationships on here and they grow into dating relationships sometimes. But overall it remains a support site to achive whatever your fitness goals may be.
Maybe you use MFP as a dating web site...it seems that way looking at your friends list. However, I have never thought of it that way. I have many friends on here and none of them have used this site as a platform for dating. I think if you come here for that reason, perhaps you have your priorities out of whack. There are plenty of dating websites that can be used for that purpose.0 -
everyone also has different body types too- so if someone wants to get down to 110-115, that may be because they have a small frame, and their body is comfortable there- I have a tiny frame and am quite short, so 110 looks completely normal, where 130 just looks lumpy on me, but on my mom- she is slightly taller than i am but looks slim and trim at 130. everyone is so different and everyones bodies are different. take everything with a grain of salt.0
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I wonder if people are "really bothered" by the 110/115 framed girls, or just secretly Jealous. To each his own.
For me, no. I weight 233 and 110/115 is not something that I would ever want to be b/c it's not healthy for me, but for someone else it might be a healthy weight for them. My whole thing is if someone does weight 110 lbs and they are obsessed over losing more weight instead of being healthier, then it's an issue. ppl will range from all shapes and sizes and there is beauty in fat, skinny, too skinny, thin, think, a little extra here or there in all shapes and sizes. Some might be jealous yes I'm sure, but hopefully they are not.
Couldn't agree more!!! Some people look great at 115, some people look too small at 115. If I was 115, I would look WAY too small, which is why my GW is 160. I am aiming to be fit and healthy, not so much skinny.
But Like others have said, everyone is here to get healthier one way or another. I love this site<30 -
I wonder if people are "really bothered" by the 110/115 framed girls, or just secretly Jealous. To each his own.
110/115 can be a healthy weight depending on the person (body type and size, body fat content, height, etc.). But it can be a very unhealthy weight on others. There are posts on here that are a little disturbing, mostly because the girls are already thin but they are unsatisfied with themselves and seem desperate to lose more. I can't imagine envying anyone that was so unhappy with their self.0 -
Jeff,
This place is for everyone (read everyone) to come together without judgement. This post is an example (read perfect example) of someone for whom MFP is not for...
I am offended by your remarks, comments, and attitude. Your judemental comments are not welcomed here. If you can not live with that I suggest you go find a 'perfect' world website where all your expectaions of others can be realized.
Otherwise if you remain here (which I welcome you to do) I respectfully suggest that you keep your ideas about other peoples journeys to yourself.
Sincerely,
ZebraHead
I'm assuming that means you believ everyone on here that reads and makes postings, does so because they dont want any comments, positive or negative, they do so because they feel it might be cathartic. I opened my psoting with an apology if it upset anyone, i stand by that apology.0 -
MFP is a universal health tool. I cherish and support my friends who are recovering from eating disorders just as much as my friends who have become obese. And there are some who have neither problem, but just want a tool to use to track the quality of their food and exercise with an eye towards continued health. The bottom line is, people who come here have a common goal to be healthy. And the social network component is a valuable support system for everyone.
If the pictures of very thin women is disturbing, stop looking at pictures. Or maybe reach out and get to know them and how they got where they are. I'm a little peeved that you'd expect the help, warmth and understanding in an overweight state, but be judging and commenting on underweight women.0 -
WOW! :noway: Where'd this come from??!! I believe the OP was merely asking what the site was intended for and not looking to battle anyone. To then tell the OP he's not welcome on the site seems a bit, well....no QUITE rude in my opinion. ::shrugs::: :ohwell:Jeff,
This place is for everyone (read everyone) to come together without judgement. This post is an example (read perfect example) of someone for whom MFP is not for...
I am offended by your remarks, comments, and attitude. Your judemental comments are not welcomed here. If you can not live with that I suggest you go find a 'perfect' world website where all your expectaions of others can be realized.
Otherwise if you remain here (which I welcome you to do) I respectfully suggest that you keep your ideas about other peoples journeys to yourself.
Sincerely,
ZebraHead
I absolutely agree with Prettypain, a question was ask and I don't see the harm in an honest question, I didn't see any malice in anything in his post.:indifferent:0 -
I understand completely where you are coming from. I am weighing in at 233 lbs and deisire to learn to jog for a healthy heart and get my weight down to 165 or whatever feels good for me and pleases my doctor. I saw people on here who weighed 110 lbs who are wanting to lose 10 or 5 lbs or ppl who weigh 125 who are dying to weight 115 and it pisses me off. Its not all about how little you can weigh but its about a healthier lifestyle. I guess I have to respect those who join only to lose a few lbs but it's just too much to see sometimes and can be discouraging that is why I opted out of adding any friends unless they are in my boat and have a lot to lose and want to be healthy... not just skin a bones.
Perhaps you should consider that 125 is actually above some people's healthy weight. Not everyone is 5'5". There are those of us who are short and have doctors telling us to lose weight. We're not "dying" to weigh 115. We're trying to get healthy. And some of us have been very heavy and now we have those last 10-15 pounds, it's not to be skin and bones, it's too be healthy. This should be a site for encouragement, not judgment simply because you think you know what someone else is dealing with.
Evidently you took offense to something that was not intended for you to take offense to. 125 might be a healhy weight for some, yes especially if they are short or they have a small body frame but I am referring to the ones obsessed with having to lose more and more and more with no healthy goals in mind. I hope you can re-read my post and realize I am not offending anyone who weighs 125 or less, not trying to offend anyone at all. I just feel this site is called my fitnesspal to be fit and it upsets me when I see a lot of people struggling with inner issues that make them think they have to starve or keep losing in order to be happy or realize they are far from healthy. When I reffered to those "dying" to lose to get skinny, honey open your eyes b/c there are some out there that really are! My opinion is my own and if you dont like it sweetie, pls move on to the next!0 -
To the OP---Here is my thoughts on your thoughts. MFP is a free website at use for all walks of life, skinny, fat, lazy, anorexic or how every you want to deem us. In your opinion, a skin and bones women is unattractive, well, you are intitled to your opinion but maybe that person is using this site as a tool for support to gain weight and be happy with they way they look. Don't judge unless ye be judged. AND DON'T make rude statements for debate.
I am here to lose weight, some of my "virtual friends" are here to maintain their body, and others that are my "virtual friends" are here to gain weight via muscle and learn how to better watch what they eat via nutrition. So this site, being free and public is for every Tom, **** and Jane in the free world. If you don't like the pics that you see, you can always close your eyes, or just avoid those pics, which would be a valid solution. I am here to have support from some amazing people, give that support back hopefully ten fold, and to lose these extra lbs that I have packed on in this journey we call life.
If that is what you are here for, so be it. But everyone has the right to use this "Free" site however the see fit. Let these people seek the knowledge and power and support they need with out judging them based on looks or pics. That is all I have to say.
*mwuah* Beav! ♥s you.0 -
Just my 2 cents on this (slightly rambling):
I wish people would read the title of the website. It is called myFITNESSpal. Fitness is not just about losing weight, fitness is about being at a HEALTHY weight, maintaining that weight, leading a healthy lifestyle.
So yes, MFP is for everyone. It is for people trying to lose weight in a healthy way. It is for people that are at a healthy weight and want to maintain that weight. It is for people who need to gain weight. It is for people who are already healthy but are looking for support and advice in relation to exercise/sports.
Nobody should judge anyone else on here. We may not all have the same goals but we can still offer support and encouragement to each other (and advice).
Pal = friend. A true friend will not judge but will encourage, motivate, and stand by their friends in good and bad.
</rant>0 -
A couple thoughts; first what do you consider skin and bones? I haven’t seen many or really any I would consider skin and bones. But there are a ton of people here and I’m sure I haven’t seen them all. I have noticed a couple that wanted to lose another 10lbs that I thought didn’t need it, but not knowing their situation who am I to say how much they should weigh? And AS A MAN, what the heck is that suppose to mean, that because you are a man, and I am a man we should see “attractive” the same way? Personally I think muscle tone is sexy, some may like a “softer” woman, and some like “skinny” women.
Bottom line is MFP is for everyone.0 -
WOW! :noway: Where'd this come from??!! I believe the OP was merely asking what the site was intended for and not looking to battle anyone. To then tell the OP he's not welcome on the site seems a bit, well....no QUITE rude in my opinion. ::shrugs::: :ohwell:Jeff,
This place is for everyone (read everyone) to come together without judgement. This post is an example (read perfect example) of someone for whom MFP is not for...
I am offended by your remarks, comments, and attitude. Your judemental comments are not welcomed here. If you can not live with that I suggest you go find a 'perfect' world website where all your expectaions of others can be realized.
Otherwise if you remain here (which I welcome you to do) I respectfully suggest that you keep your ideas about other peoples journeys to yourself.
Sincerely,
ZebraHead
I absolutely agree with Prettypain, a question was ask and I don't see the harm in an honest question, I didn't see any malice in anything in his post.:indifferent:
You told it STRAIGHT Becca!!!0 -
No matter the body type, age, goals, race, gender etc…we all have 2 things in common here, a heart and a soul. While these things may bother you it doesn’t change the fact that your words could be hurting someone else on here. They may look like profile pictures to you, but they are people with the same emotions and goals as any of the rest of us.
And words can never be taken back.
With that being said, this website if for anyone who wants to better their lives…no matter what that means.0 -
i dont understand why its seen as ok to refer to 115 as freakishly low, or too skinny, when not very many people would be so rude about someone with a much higher goal weight as to comment on how fat it was etc.
We all have different bodies, different builds, different goals, and different reasons for wanting to get there, and really, all any of us want is to be happy with their body.
I dont mind when people have low goal weights, as long as theyre sensible about it, because when people starve themselves it makes me a bit sad, but i still have the sensitivity to know when something is my business, and when its not.
My goal weight is/was borderline between healthy and underweight - i admit it. Ive been running 5 times a week to acheive this and watching what i eat, but not starving myself by ANY stretch of the imagination. Most days i eat between 1500 and 2000 calories and keep it fairly well balanced. Whos business is it really except my own as long as im doing it in a healthy way0 -
Final words - To everyone who is talking about how others use this site, please stop. This is unbecoming and is really hurtful to people that you don't even know, let alone know enough to attempt to judge or ridicule. And even if you 'think' you know something it is not your place to publicly have any thoughts about anyone.0
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When I first started I thought it was just for weight loss but now I know it's for getting/learning a health lifestyle. In the goals section, where you can choose how much you want to lose, there is also an option to gain.
My daughter's friend is a recovering anorexic and I know she struggles to eat enough. There are days she only eats 300 calories. I would love to see her here learning to eat correctly and have a better relationship with food and have support that she doesn't get from her own family and even her doctors.
I think everyone here wants to change to be more healthy, whether it's to loose or gain, maintain, add muscle or just to learn to eat more healthy.0 -
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Jeff,
This place is for everyone (read everyone) to come together without judgement. This post is an example (read perfect example) of someone for whom MFP is not for...
I am offended by your remarks, comments, and attitude. Your judemental comments are not welcomed here. If you can not live with that I suggest you go find a 'perfect' world website where all your expectaions of others can be realized.
Otherwise if you remain here (which I welcome you to do) I respectfully suggest that you keep your ideas about other peoples journeys to yourself.
Sincerely,
ZebraHead
*tear* *standing ovation*
BRAVA!!! :drinker:0 -
Just my 2 cents on this (slightly rambling):
I wish people would read the title of the website. It is called myFITNESSpal. Fitness is not just about losing weight, fitness is about being at a HEALTHY weight, maintaining that weight, leading a healthy lifestyle.
So yes, MFP is for everyone. It is for people trying to lose weight in a healthy way. It is for people that are at a healthy weight and want to maintain that weight. It is for people who need to gain weight. It is for people who are already healthy but are looking for support and advice in relation to exercise/sports.
Nobody should judge anyone else on here. We may not all have the same goals but we can still offer support and encouragement to each other (and advice).
Pal = friend. A true friend will not judge but will encourage, motivate, and stand by their friends in good and bad.
</rant>
And you are an amazing friend to have!!0 -
i dont understand why its seen as ok to refer to 115 as freakishly low, or too skinny, when not very many people would be so rude about someone with a much higher goal weight as to comment on how fat it was etc.
We all have different bodies, different builds, different goals, and different reasons for wanting to get there, and really, all any of us want is to be happy with their body.
I dont mind when people have low goal weights, as long as theyre sensible about it, because when people starve themselves it makes me a bit sad, but i still have the sensitivity to know when something is my business, and when its not.
My goal weight is/was borderline between healthy and underweight - i admit it. Ive been running 5 times a week to acheive this and watching what i eat, but not starving myself by ANY stretch of the imagination. Most days i eat between 1500 and 2000 calories and keep it fairly well balanced. Whos business is it really except my own as long as im doing it in a healthy way
Congrats on your success so far! I agree with your post and I commend you on how hard you are working to live a healthier life! This post is true motivation to anyone needing some today!
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We are now not allowed to have thoughts about anyone? I think I missed this memo..........:smokin:Final words - To everyone who is talking about how others use this site, please stop. This is unbecoming and is really hurtful to people that you don't even know, let alone know enough to attempt to judge or ridicule. And even if you 'think' you know something it is not your place to publicly have any thoughts about anyone.0 -
Jeff,
This place is for everyone (read everyone) to come together without judgement. This post is an example (read perfect example) of someone for whom MFP is not for...
I am offended by your remarks, comments, and attitude. Your judemental comments are not welcomed here. If you can not live with that I suggest you go find a 'perfect' world website where all your expectaions of others can be realized.
Otherwise if you remain here (which I welcome you to do) I respectfully suggest that you keep your ideas about other peoples journeys to yourself.
Sincerely,
ZebraHead
Freedom of speech is just that, a right to voice opinions and ask questions freely. I actually found the OP comments and questions very honest and I have had a few of them myself so I applaud him for asking them. I can't see anyone else who has been offended and from the responses from the "Slim" people he asked about their replies have been informative and gracious. I would like to ask why your opinions are more valid than others however as you are asking the OP "to keep ideas about other people's journeys to yourself"?
I am not questioning or slamming Jeff's journey. Merely his statements about other people that he has no idea, knowledge, or justification to speak to.
This is not an opinon about Jeff or his lifestyle, issues, problems, loves, hates, or his journey. It is a direct response to his callus observation about others and his 'opinons' about who MFP is for...
For those of you who understand... No explaination is required
For those of you who do not... no explanation will suffice0 -
Jeff,
This place is for everyone (read everyone) to come together without judgement. This post is an example (read perfect example) of someone for whom MFP is not for...
I am offended by your remarks, comments, and attitude. Your judemental comments are not welcomed here. If you can not live with that I suggest you go find a 'perfect' world website where all your expectaions of others can be realized.
Otherwise if you remain here (which I welcome you to do) I respectfully suggest that you keep your ideas about other peoples journeys to yourself.
Sincerely,
ZebraHead *tear* *standing ovation*
BRAVA!!! :drinker:
I must have missed something in the OP. This outrageously mean response seems uncalled for. I didn't hear him say anything other than some posts disturb him. Why should that offend anyone?0 -
We are now not allowed to have thoughts about anyone? I think I missed this memo..........:smokin:Final words - To everyone who is talking about how others use this site, please stop. This is unbecoming and is really hurtful to people that you don't even know, let alone know enough to attempt to judge or ridicule. And even if you 'think' you know something it is not your place to publicly have any thoughts about anyone.
So you are prepared to openly talk about other's life choices? To discuss with vigor their stupidity for why their life doesn't meet your ideals?0 -
I have no clue either, all I can figure is there must be two threads and we're on a separate one?Jeff,
This place is for everyone (read everyone) to come together without judgement. This post is an example (read perfect example) of someone for whom MFP is not for...
I am offended by your remarks, comments, and attitude. Your judemental comments are not welcomed here. If you can not live with that I suggest you go find a 'perfect' world website where all your expectaions of others can be realized.
Otherwise if you remain here (which I welcome you to do) I respectfully suggest that you keep your ideas about other peoples journeys to yourself.
Sincerely,
ZebraHead *tear* *standing ovation*
BRAVA!!! :drinker:
I must have missed something in the OP. This outrageously mean response seems uncalled for. I didn't hear him say anything other than some posts disturb him. Why should that offend anyone?
I certainly didn't see anything mean in the OP. Funny how different ppl can see things so very differently and get bent quite out of shape over it!!:noway: 0 -
I have no clue either, all I can figure is there must be two threads and we're on a separate one?Jeff,
This place is for everyone (read everyone) to come together without judgement. This post is an example (read perfect example) of someone for whom MFP is not for...
I am offended by your remarks, comments, and attitude. Your judemental comments are not welcomed here. If you can not live with that I suggest you go find a 'perfect' world website where all your expectaions of others can be realized.
Otherwise if you remain here (which I welcome you to do) I respectfully suggest that you keep your ideas about other peoples journeys to yourself.
Sincerely,
ZebraHead *tear* *standing ovation*
BRAVA!!! :drinker:
I must have missed something in the OP. This outrageously mean response seems uncalled for. I didn't hear him say anything other than some posts disturb him. Why should that offend anyone? I certainly didn't see anything mean in the OP. Funny how different ppl can see things so very differently and get bent quite out of shape over it!!:noway:
Then you too are part of the problem0 -
It is not up to anyone on this site but the creators to decide if people should be allowed on this site or not.It is NOT your job or the job of a few others I see on this thread to question others reasons behind being here.Why dont you worry about yourself.
Oh and Jeff you do not look that heavy in your profile pic so by your logic maybe you should go deactivate your profile now since it does not seem you have that much weight to lose,and thats IS all this site is for right?0 -
i have to whole heartedly agee with Big Beaver and Zebrahead, this site is so much more to so many people. for people with an eating disorder, its a tool to help take control of their lives and get the support from wonderful friends who genuinally seem to care about what they are going through! For people that are trying to lose weight, this is a great tool to count calories, keep track of food intake and exercise, and get support from, again, great people who care and can understand. For people who just want to get toned, for what ever the reason, via healthy look, or a triathalon, marathon,which is my reason for being here. i found some of the most amazing people i will ever know, who gave me the support i needed to keep working toward my goal, when NOBODY in my day to day life, friends or family, with the exception of one very special person in my life, would do!!
Jeff, have you ever been told by every one in you life that you can't achieve the one thing you want most in your life. well guess what, i have and i have found that this site and my friends have become my HOME, my safe place where i get the encourgement and support to keep me working on being fit, healthy, eating better, and working towards a better way of life!
So before you make the decision that this is a site for just overweight people, why dont you think twice about judging what others need and goals are! This sitehas also become a release for stress which for your information is again a way to be healthier!
This is a site to become healthy, what every the goal, lose weight,gain weight, maintain weight, tone, and above all get the support from "FAMILY" because thats how ive come to view many of my friends here, because they are here for me when others that should be in my "real life" arent. .
to all my "family" on here...I thank you for your love and suppory every step of the way that you give me in reaching my goals.!!!!! I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!
My last thought to people like Jeff is if you want a site for just weight loss and for people losing weight, join Jenny Craig!!!!
That is all.......0 -
This site is for people who try to get healthy. Not all of them are. Only today I've seen couple of profiles, first - girl who is already underweight - 159cm with a UG of 41kg. With a profile post - hunger hurts, but starving is the way to go!
Second, girl at 110lbs was debating how to get back to being anorexic, cz bulimia wasnt that good for her teeth, and anyways, she just loves that empty feeling in her stomach. She only wants to lose another 10lbs or so. She wants to be THIN and beautiful. Not healthy and beautiful. THIN.
So, are you saying that this site is for them, too? Its like a whole group that encourages ED. MFP was not made for that.0 -
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