Venting and Kind of Being a Jerk, Sorry...

lollie1285

Just wanna give a big thumbs up to whoever censored the big T word. Good lawd I don't think I've ever seen that word used so much in such a short amount of time!

schnarfo

Just wanna give a big thumbs up to whoever censored the big T word. Good lawd I don't think I've ever seen that word used so much in such a short amount of time!

Yes thank you ms natalie

Ms_Natalie

Hi guys,
Firstly, can we please keep the language off the forums. Not sure why that particular word is not censored but it IS a derogatory term when used in this context.

Secondly, please stick to the forum rules. If someone says something that offends you then please report the post and a moderator will have a look at it. Do NOT retaliate.

Some posts have been edited to remove the offensive material to allow the thread to remain open. Some posts have been completely deleted as they could not be successfully edited. Please continue this debate/discussion in a civil manner....some of the posts here have made for uncomfortable reading.

Ms_Natalie

MyFitnessPal Forum Moderator.

Fesse

I know what you mean. It is irritating when a skinny **** says she's fat. And an overweight person tries to fish for sympathy from other people. At least we all know who the real insecure ones really are. :-P Stay true to yourself and keep your goals in mind. Dont let other people's negativity drag you down.

a little bit harsh dontcha think, people are here for different reasons, first of all i congratulate them for being here and wanting to make the change at all, whether they have a disorder whether they are FAT or skinny, i don't judge anyone, we're all here to support each other whatever the reason we're here, and not every FAT **** goes to MacDonalds 4 times a week !!!!!!!!!!

**Standing Ovation**
Very well said my sweet girl!

KierstyPants

I think you should avoid the forums

Why is that?
She's completely correct in most people's views. In mine for that matter.
She's just venting and not saying it's fact.

Painten

This site/app is c alled MY FITNESS PAL that is becuase this site is about fitness not just weightloss. Yes it has brilliant tools for those of use to help in our weightloss goals and those who have goals to gain weight it also has tools for those who want to get toned aswell as those who just want to get fit. It's for everyone who wants to be fitter and healthier.

The forums here are also to help support people with whatever they need be it they can't stop themselves eating but know they need to lose or tose that know they need to eat more but can't do that. This isn't the place for judging people over anything. IF your here then your not perfect yourself so shouldn't expect that from others.

Ms_Natalie

Just wanna give a big thumbs up to whoever censored the big T word. Good lawd I don't think I've ever seen that word used so much in such a short amount of time!

Yes thank you ms natalie

No problem :flowerforyou:

With hindsight I should have censored the word from the first post in which it was mentioned, but as I realised it was a highly derogatory word, I quickly edited the post, so therefore from the first couple of pages some sentences have been deleted which contained the word. The meaning of edited posts however was not altered in any way.

Cheers again :flowerforyou:

schnarfo

I think you should avoid the forums

Why is that?
She's completely correct in most people's views. In mine for that matter.
She's just venting and not saying it's fact.

Correct in most peoples views? I think youll find this thread has had mixed responses. If you dont like it then dont come to the forums, simple really. chose who you want to be friends with and stick to them so that your no longer irritated by skinny people.

mommyoftwins05

I totally agree!

Mads1997

Oh heck don't mention the word skinny on thew forums or you're the worst person in the world.!!!

MissAnjy

In all honesty, instead of finding that "skinny girl" annoying who complains about her fat rolls, why don't you sympathize with her. Yeah, so she's "thinner than you" that doesn't mean that she's secure in herself. She obviously has self esteem issues and negative self image. It doesn't matter if she's fat, thin, chubby, skinny as a rail. Point is, she's not content with herself and I believe 100% that we should be empathizing with those people, not judging. We're all here because we want to make a change in our lives. Just because someone doesn't have "as big of a change" to make, doesn't make their journey any less significant then yours.

I WAS that girl that you're complaining about. I was 165lbs (thin by most people's standards) and my friend was heavier set. She would get annoyed that I "wasn't happy with myself" when I was "so skinny". Point was, I DIDN'T SEE MYSELF THAT WAY. I had such a negative self image of myself, I SAW MYSELF as HER SIZE. I thought I was big. It's body dysmorphia. Instead of being negative and getting "pissed off" because they're thinner then you yet complaining, why not ask that person how they see themselves? I don't agree with how you dismissed the "skinny girl who got called fat one time by her mother". You obviously have no idea how a single negative comment can lead to serious eating disorders, negative self image etc. You're lashing out because you're angry. It's not your friend's fault that you're bigger than her, and that she's smaller than you. And, just because she's smaller than you, doesn't mean she should be satisfied with herself. We all have different aspirations and goals.

You have a lot of pent up anger. I suggest you take it out in your workouts. Re-direct that negative energy into something positive for you. Instead of lashing out on a public forum and causing an outrage, do what I do, take out all your frustrations on the treadmill. It's a more productive way.

funfitfoodie

Just wondering how some people are going to feel when they reach their goals and are now that sk*nny b*tch everyone seems to hate on... the mirror has 2 faces people so tread lightly on how you judge others... b/c if you hopefully reach your goals... you may be getting a taste of your own medicine.

Well said!

Mads1997

Just wondering how some people are going to feel when they reach their goals and are now that sk*nny b*tch everyone seems to hate on... the mirror has 2 faces people so tread lightly on how you judge others... b/c if you hopefully reach your goals... you may be getting a taste of your own medicine.

It would seem lots don't have a problem with the term. Check this link.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/245036-operation-skinny-b-tch-5-13-8-13-week-2?hl=skinny#posts-3307523

ilikeflowers

We are all here to better ourselves, support eachother, and reach our goals. Being one of the skinny girls that you're talking about I wanted to express that everyone has their own battles and struggles. So when an overweight person is trying to lose weight and looks for support it ok, but when a thin person looks for support it's fishing for compliments? Do I have to have been at least 300 pounds to deserve support? To the women that have lost weight, are here trying to lose weight, or have reached their goal I support everyone equally. I consider myself my biggest competitor, I don't judge others. How many times do you see people saying "I'm so excited look at me I lost all this weight before and after photos!" and I think that's amazing and love it, we're here to support. But because my goals are different I'm not allowed to share my small victories? Sometimes I feel oppressed where I have to walk on eggshells for fear of making someone angry that I'm working on myself. What if I feel beautiful that day and wanted to share it like many of the other fabulous women (and men!) on here? In real life I feel shunned from alot of my friends that are self conscious about their weight or roll their eyes when I say I want to get into better shape. I can't talk to many people about it without them getting passive aggressive. I welcome your rant, let it out. We all have our own struggles and through communication and support we can better understand each other and help each other reach goals, whatever they might be.

funfitfoodie

Just wondering how some people are going to feel when they reach their goals and are now that sk*nny b*tch everyone seems to hate on... the mirror has 2 faces people so tread lightly on how you judge others... b/c if you hopefully reach your goals... you may be getting a taste of your own medicine.

It would seem lots don't have a problem with the term. Check this link.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/245036-operation-skinny-b-tch-5-13-8-13-week-2?hl=skinny#posts-3307523

I'm find with it as long as its intention isn't derogatory

cupotee

OMG I know what you mean. Or the skinny people who are like, "OMG I'M SO FREAKING FAT." So then you go, "well, eat better and exercise." and then they go "Well, I'm not THAT fat." Haaate fishers

MattAxtell

In this thread:

Fat people hating on skinny people.

Then skinny people hating on fat people for hating on skinny people.

Thanks for the hearty chuckle

Good read

busygirl1

Well said. I am leader of a weight loss support group and I hear the same excuses every week.

wow, as the leader of a support group I would have expected more empathy!

I think the rest has been just about covered, you shouldn't read peoples 'fishing' posts if they annoy you so much.

Lisone

In all honesty, instead of finding that "skinny girl" annoying who complains about her fat rolls, why don't you sympathize with her. Yeah, so she's "thinner than you" that doesn't mean that she's secure in herself. She obviously has self esteem issues and negative self image. It doesn't matter if she's fat, thin, chubby, skinny as a rail. Point is, she's not content with herself and I believe 100% that we should be empathizing with those people, not judging. We're all here because we want to make a change in our lives. Just because someone doesn't have "as big of a change" to make, doesn't make their journey any less significant then yours.

I WAS that girl that you're complaining about. I was 165lbs (thin by most people's standards) and my friend was heavier set. She would get annoyed that I "wasn't happy with myself" when I was "so skinny". Point was, I DIDN'T SEE MYSELF THAT WAY. I had such a negative self image of myself, I SAW MYSELF as HER SIZE. I thought I was big. It's body dysmorphia. Instead of being negative and getting "pissed off" because they're thinner then you yet complaining, why not ask that person how they see themselves? I don't agree with how you dismissed the "skinny girl who got called fat one time by her mother". You obviously have no idea how a single negative comment can lead to serious eating disorders, negative self image etc. You're lashing out because you're angry. It's not your friend's fault that you're bigger than her, and that she's smaller than you. And, just because she's smaller than you, doesn't mean she should be satisfied with herself. We all have different aspirations and goals.

You have a lot of pent up anger. I suggest you take it out in your workouts. Re-direct that negative energy into something positive for you. Instead of lashing out on a public forum and causing an outrage, do what I do, take out all your frustrations on the treadmill. It's a more productive way.

I TOTALLY AGREE! :flowerforyou:

BarnAvVårTid

jeez people, you do realize a lot of therapists are going to be needed, right? where I live the regime is cutting down on the psychiatrists because they don't think they're that needed. they're so wrong.
everybody wants a personal therapist nowadays. I think we should all just learn how to deal with each other.

if a skinny girl needs therapy in your opinion, then give her some. not that hard is it?

rundgrenfan

Like religion, fitness advice seems best taken when given by showing a good example, not by force!

Everyone here is at a different point in their weight loss/gain/toning perspective. I can see my old self, my current self, and my future self in a lot of the different postings. I like that because I can see that I'm growing (while shrinking!).

Personally, while I cruise the forums, I find the most satisfaction at having friended people who are similar in size, goal, and age, and motvation level!

Higglyjiggly64

First, I don't think damcool was being negative or saying people shouldn't be on here. I believe she is frustrated by some of the people around her. Be honest, aren't we all. She came on here just to vent. Isn't that what this is forum is for? Motivation AND support? I was both those people she talks about. I'm ashamed when I look back at how much I complained about how fat I was. But like another poster said this was how I saw myself. Now I'm on the other side. I was the fat person on the couch eating junk food whining about being out of shape. That said, I understand the frustration that damcool feels. There is a person where I work who keeps asking me, "What's the name of the website? I have to lose some weight!" I want to just look at her now after 4 months of asking and say if you haven't gone on by now, forget it! But I don't, because I know that she, like me, will reach the point when she is ready and will finally get on MFP. Then again, maybe not, but I will keep giving her the name. I also know that when I reach my goal weight (which is 20 pounds heavier than back when I thought I was FAT) I will TOTALLY appreciate where I am at that point in my life. Heck, I APPRECIATE where I am now! We have to remember that if someone's venting or emotional outpouring bothers us, to just go to the next post rather than start arguements. We'll all be happier for it.

StevLL

I believe the OP was talking about folks she interacts with and not all and isn't this supposed to be a place to vent no matter what our frustrations? That being said here is my take,

Luckily I have not had too much negative experience here and have to say overall MFP is a wonderful site. I think it's great to have an eclectic continuum of folks along the body size scale to relate too and get advise and inspiration from. I have been lucky enough to have all positive friends and nobody is too obsessed with a particular view. We are all here together trying to achieve a healthier lifestyle and that looks different for all, but support and encouragement are and should be neutral to our goals, not subject to. (if that makes sense) I would hope as fellow beings we would just reach out and offer support from our hearts and not try to cast judgment or push our personal agendas on each other.

As for commenting on diaries, I tend not to worry too much about their calories unless it is a striking contrast to what I know their goals are. Let's face it if you are showing up consistently and making the effort, then that's half the battle and I believe needs recognition and encouragement. So what if someone's over or under one day or even a few. If they consistently show up, lose weight, fluctuate, or have NSV's, or not, then I'm going to support them, becuase I want them to keep coming back so they stay committed and eventually find their path to success. I know there is no utopian community anywhere online or on the ground, but we can create a caring, supportive and encouraging place, by our actions. This place rocks and I wish you all success, however that looks for you!

Panda_Jack

pyro13g

Compulsive use that causes harm = addiction. A person can only blame themselves for their body. If it's a medical condition or mental one getting in the way, then they need to get the right help. McDonalds or any other source of food isn't the problem, it's the person putting what they sell in their mouth.

anubis609

IamRoJ

I know what you mean. Stay true to yourself and keep your goals in mind. Dont let other people's negativity drag you down.

a little bit harsh dontcha think, people are here for different reasons, first of all i congratulate them for being here and wanting to make the change at all, whether they have a disorder whether they are FAT or skinny, i don't judge anyone, we're all here to support each other whatever the reason we're here, and not every FAT **** goes to MacDonalds 4 times a week !!!!!!!!!!

I agree with SJD here...why is it OK to be harsh and judgemental but not to be insecure regardless of weight? I've never been the "skinny" girl, but I am sure they have some of the same hangups us chubsters do! I will support 'em regardless!

bayabaya

well that is why we have forums.. for people to ask and say whatever they want. unfortunately you cannot change how people and feel and what they want to say. if you dont like it, then dont read it & i suggest you stay away from the forums.

nab22

Hahaha panda_jack.

My two cents: If you were more open-minded to the struggles of people smaller than you like myself, you would know that a common problem with "skinny" people, especially girls, is that many of us still can still be considered obese because we have unhealthy body fat percentages. So, rather than judging people that YOU think should be happy with themselves, why not give them the same support you yourself joined MFP to find, because we're all here to be healthy and change our lifestyles, not to look like toothpicks.

bayabaya

nab22, well said !