Venting and Kind of Being a Jerk, Sorry...

ilikeflowers

I know what you mean. Stay true to yourself and keep your goals in mind. Dont let other people's negativity drag you down.

a little bit harsh dontcha think, people are here for different reasons, first of all i congratulate them for being here and wanting to make the change at all, whether they have a disorder whether they are FAT or skinny, i don't judge anyone, we're all here to support each other whatever the reason we're here, and not every FAT **** goes to MacDonalds 4 times a week !!!!!!!!!!

I agree with SJD here...why is it OK to be harsh and judgemental but not to be insecure regardless of weight? I've never been the "skinny" girl, but I am sure they have some of the same hangups us chubsters do! I will support 'em regardless!

Great support! This is why we are all here

KierstyPants

I think you should avoid the forums

Why is that?
She's completely correct in most people's views. In mine for that matter.
She's just venting and not saying it's fact.

Correct in most peoples views? I think youll find this thread has had mixed responses. If you dont like it then dont come to the forums, simple really. chose who you want to be friends with and stick to them so that your no longer irritated by skinny people.

I reread this post and I read other people's views. I changed my perspective really. And I'm sorry I made a completely Incorrect generalization. You're right. People choose their frieda and that's how things go (:

KierstyPants

HOLY TRIPLE POST. I'm so sorry.

KickassYas

i remember when pancake bunny died. 01/07/2003 i got the saddest news of my young internet life. I sniffled and blogged about it. YOU ARE SORELY MISSED OOLONG!!!

to the OP: the journey is different for everyone and i understand your frustration. I felt that way too. until i fell off the wagon so hard i bounced. when it rained in my life it sh*tstormed. so yeah. we all have our own ways of dealing. some aren't ready. some are complainers. some take it quietly and continue to fight. some are extremely successful and some fail miserably. this site is a site to allow us to be selfish and do what is needed for us.

so anyone you are tired of seeing, remove from your wall. and take a deep breath and feel better that you won't have to deal with their emotional baggage on top of your own. I gut my wall when needed. sometimes i find a friend is more of a frenemy. sometimes i end up with a negative nancy and sometimes i need my pals tell me to stop being the negative nancy. human beings are just that. human.

i don't know whether i'm ready or not. what i do know is i refuse to give up regardless becuase i can't. i just can't. i'm 311 lbs. there is no excuse for that. I may never be ready but i'm going to do this even if i ***** all the way down this road.

allybtucker

In this thread:

Fat people hating on skinny people.

Then skinny people hating on fat people for hating on skinny people.

Thanks for the hearty chuckle

Good read

That's the attitude I like! LOL

miss_ally08

You go girl!

ace175

I see where you're coming from a bit....I had an old roommate who was probably 110 pounds....idk how much but she was a twig, and all she eats is junk. One day I come home and she's like "want to hear my new resolution....I want to lose 10 pounds , work out more, and eat healthy" ....it kind of annoyed me b/c she does NOT need to lose any weight, and I had just started my weight loss journey. But at the same time, she did add that she wanted to start eating healthier and work out more, which is great! Everyone and anyone should/can do that! (oh and she only worked out once, and continued to eat crap!) But anyways, I do understand a bit...lol

soonermommy3

[I agree!! [/quote]

The only negativity here is from the OP... why do you all care about what other people are doing? They are the ones that have to live (or die) with their choices... the real insecure ones have to try to inflict some sort of control on the actions of others... Get real and spend more time developing your own lives.
[/quote]
*************************************

Now THIS is well said!!! There are always going to be people that say something that makes you roll your eyes. Big freaking deal, get over it. It's their lives to live and you have your own. Quit worrying about how many times a week they go to McDonadls and then complain about it here.

The beauty of these kinds of message boards is that....if you don;t like the freaking topic...move the hell on.

I have had weight issues for a few years...I KNOW I need to lose it, but I also can't stop eating...I love food, lol. So I am here trying to find a balance and to get healthy. No need for YOU to worry about whether or not I am serious about losing weight.

Geez.
[/quote]

I agree 100%.

Noctuary

I agree with the OP. I too could care less about the need for attention people have via posting rants about other people's struggles.

shonasteele

Everyone has their own struggle - for some of us it's food, for others its exercise, or drugs, or smoking or their big nose, or being too tall or too short or having pointy ears. Whatever the issue, it has an effect on you that only you can fully realize the extent of. I think we just need to be compassionate and realize that we're all here to achieve our goals and try to improve ourselves in whatever way we can and (supposedly) to support each other in that process.

Having said that, I think we are all entitled to vent every once in a while and get out our frustrations. As long as you're not being a 'hater' all the time and you don't treat others badly, it's okay to get some of that out when you need to, especially if you have no other place to vent it.

poesch77

In this thread:

Fat people hating on skinny people.

Then skinny people hating on fat people for hating on skinny people.

Thanks for the hearty chuckle

Good read

That's the attitude I like! LOL

I second this.......
Really people? Read and move on......this is worse than high school!

amy_36

I am not one of the "skinny" girls. But I do want to say that in the medical world there is talk of a "skinny fat". People can be "skinny" and still be very unhealthy. I think everyone belongs on here no matter where they are at in their journey. It may take some people years to catch on, it may take some a few months. We all need to be supportive of one another. Who knows when we might be "that person".

Cherilea

BAHAHA!! Love the bunny!!

bizco

You've written exactly what I've been thinking for a long time but I just never said anything. Way to go girl! Hopefully your "rant" will open some people's eyes. No lambasting from me!

gabeswife

In this thread:

Fat people hating on skinny people.

Then skinny people hating on fat people for hating on skinny people.

Thanks for the hearty chuckle

Good read

You have a great way with words. I total laughed when I read this because I have been laughing along the way too.

All I have to say is in my opinion I'm a total fat girl, and I would love to be a skinny b*tch. Here's to working hard for it!

AshDHart

I saw this on facebook earlier this year:

The Girl you just called fat? She has been starving herself & has lost over 30lbs. The Boy you called stupid, he has a learning disability & studies over 4hrs a night. The Girl you called ugly? She spends hours putting make-up on hoping people will like her. The Boy you called a *kitten*? It kills him inside because he fears rejection. There's a lot more to people then you think.

We don't know the struggles others are going through so it's impossible to make generalities about others. It made me realize that the girl that is skinny might be struggling with an eating disorder or body issues and deserves as much respect as I do. Sure she might be complaining about life but then at some point we all do. If someone is truly negative then just tune them out of your life but don't let them bring you into their negative space.

wintermama13

To the OP: Thank you, I have been thinking the exact same thing for years now!!
To all the hateful negative commenters: take a chill pill. She knew that what she was saying would probably not sit well with everyone but it was something she wanted to get out. I never put it out there like that. My own experience is not ONLY on MFP but in other areas of my life as well. Skinny people, overweight people, obese people, everybody. If this is supposed to be such a great place for "skinny" people to be able to vent about their own frustrations (because of course they have them, who doesn't really?) then why can't anyone else voice their own opinion. "Do as I say not as I do" applies everywhere I guess.
Good luck everyone reaching your goals and have a great week!

bizco

First, I don't think damcool was being negative or saying people shouldn't be on here. I believe she is frustrated by some of the people around her. Be honest, aren't we all. She came on here just to vent. Isn't that what this is forum is for? Motivation AND support? That said, I understand the frustration that damcool feels. There is a person where I work who keeps asking me, "What's the name of the website? I have to lose some weight!" I want to just look at her now after 4 months of asking and say if you haven't gone on by now, forget it! But I don't, because I know that she, like me, will reach the point when she is ready and will finally get on MFP. Then again, maybe not, but I will keep giving her the name. We have to remember that if someone's venting or emotional outpouring bothers us, to just go to the next post rather than start arguements. We'll all be happier for it.

Best response yet! I couldn't agree more.

wintermama13

First, I don't think damcool was being negative or saying people shouldn't be on here. I believe she is frustrated by some of the people around her. Be honest, aren't we all. She came on here just to vent. Isn't that what this is forum is for? Motivation AND support? That said, I understand the frustration that damcool feels. There is a person where I work who keeps asking me, "What's the name of the website? I have to lose some weight!" I want to just look at her now after 4 months of asking and say if you haven't gone on by now, forget it! But I don't, because I know that she, like me, will reach the point when she is ready and will finally get on MFP. Then again, maybe not, but I will keep giving her the name. We have to remember that if someone's venting or emotional outpouring bothers us, to just go to the next post rather than start arguements. We'll all be happier for it.

Best response yet! I couldn't agree more.

I must have skipped over this post but that's pretty much what I was trying to get out.

kathy1117

so, im one of those "skinny girls" who talk bout losing weight, but more-so its about being healthy for me. i might b skinny 2 others, but im not the weight ive always been,so i just wanna b happy w myself. what others think bout me isnt my concern. i wanna b my normal weight, and look healthy and tone,so whn some1 says " ur skinny, u look fine" thats not how i feel about MYSELF. once i reach my goal , im hoping 2 take more from MFP and eat healthy,excersize and im hoping itll become normal daily activity. i want heathly eating habits. we should b all here encouraging eachother, offering advice,lending a hand etc etc. i understand u were frustrated, but as some1 said earlier...take it out on the tredmill, thatll make u feel better, right? works 4 me

supertracylynn

Oh my. Yes. You apparently started it!

I've been fat... I was 218 and wearing a size 22 at 5'6". I was 41% body fat according to the Navy.

Thanks to a move across the country, no one where I live has known me as "fat".

They know me as 150-135-145. (when I moved here, I was 150, I got down to 135, now I am am sitting at about 145). I am about 18% body fat now, wearing a size 6.

THESE people only know me as the thin person obsessed with her eating patterns and jogging. They say snide things when I talk about needing to hit the gym, eat healthier, etc.

I know what it's like to be on both sides, someone viewed as slim and wanting to remain as such, complaining about my flabby skin (which is from bearing my 3 precious children) and as someone who *LOVES* to eat and can't seem to stop.

I'm with YOU...

It boils down to choices and self control. And I tell you what: I like myself a LOT more now than I did 75-80#s ago.

Andythefitfamilyman

Me two cents, I think everyone has the right to vent and to debate. That being said I'm here to support the fat/skinny people trying for a better healthier life style like me. Oh and I love pancake head bunny he will be missed

damcool

I never thought that this would be such a big debate. On my end, I want to clear the air. I absolutely do not hate skinny or fat people!! I mean, if I did, wear does that leave me? I guess what I'm frustrated with is needy people. I am a strong, confident (most of the time) woman. I see and know how it feels to be fat and skinny, but not happy with what I see. My complaint is that I had a friend on MFP that was 100 lbs and CONSTANTLY was on there fishing for compliments. She went on there within hours saying that she was going out to lunch at a burger joint, then posted how fat she was. Are you kidding??? I have another friend on Mfp, that she constantly posts all of the McDonald's she eats and how she knows she needs to get back on track, but I don't know if she's ever been on track! I only posted this because I really do care about people doing what needs to be done to better their lives!!! I don't look at weight for the most part. My point was, Skinny or Fat, psychology is needed to make us whole, well rounded individuals...

BriannaStrum

I totally agree with you!!! I think it is stupid for people to be posting on here that you shouldn't care about how they loose weight, or why they want to or what their struggles are because they wouldn't have joined this website and made friends if that wasn't what they were looking for. Well they found the support they need and you gave it them. I say for those people out there. If it doesn't aply to you then ignore it. If it does and you notice that you just might be doing it because lets face it some people are on here just for attention, then you can choose to fix it or just ignore it. Don't let it bother you. It doesn't mean you have to judge Damcool because she noticed something about people from her point of view! I am so glad that she is my friend because is a wonderful support system and she does know a lot of what she is talking about because look at her results. She has lost over 70 pounds. She supports me in my greatness and calls me out in my crap. We all have crap. Luggage that we carry around for whatever reason and we use it to make excuses about how we can't do things right or we have to do things a certain way because that's just the way we are instead of saying "Hey I do do that. Hmmmm....Do I like that I do that? I guess not. Well now I can work on changing it to the way I want because I am a fighter, I CAN do this and I will."


I also what to say thank you to Damcool because if she wouldn't have become my friend I never would have known how she lost her weight. Now I am doing what she does and I have lost 7 pounds so far. But I still have a lot more to go.

KickassYas

I never thought that this would be such a big debate. On my end, I want to clear the air. I absolutely do not hate skinny or fat people!! I mean, if I did, wear does that leave me? I guess what I'm frustrated with is needy people. I am a strong, confident (most of the time) woman. I see and know how it feels to be fat and skinny, but not happy with what I see. My complaint is that I had a friend on MFP that was 100 lbs and CONSTANTLY was on there fishing for compliments. She went on there within hours saying that she was going out to lunch at a burger joint, then posted how fat she was. Are you kidding??? I have another friend on Mfp, that she constantly posts all of the McDonald's she eats and how she knows she needs to get back on track, but I don't know if she's ever been on track! I only posted this because I really do care about people doing what needs to be done to better their lives!!! I don't look at weight for the most part. My point was, Skinny or Fat, psychology is needed to make us whole, well rounded individuals...

you know if you find a good dr. for bariatric surgery they usually force you to go through 6 months of therapy prior. Sometimes I feel like every health plan should require that. Seek help mentally as you seek help physically. (NOT CONDONING SURGERY!!!) just think mental health is a huge portion of the decisions we make regarding what we shove into our gullets. Most people overweight are emotional eaters. Then why is there no help for that outside OEA? (Over Eaters ANon)

Becca_007

I think the world would be a much better place if everyone would focus as much energy on themselves that they do on what other people are doing... just my two cents... I have a very busy fulfilled life to spend so much unneccessary energy focused on what other people are doing... what's the point?

Love your attitude, glad you took a moment to share!! :flowerforyou:

bcattoes

I think the world would be a much better place if everyone would focus as much energy on themselves that they do on what other people are doing... just my two cents... I have a very busy fulfilled life to spend so much unneccessary energy focused on what other people are doing... what's the point?

I really don't want to be mean, but surely you see the irony in the fact that you took time to post this. :ohwell:

Becca_007

I think the world would be a much better place if everyone would focus as much energy on themselves that they do on what other people are doing... just my two cents... I have a very busy fulfilled life to spend so much unneccessary energy focused on what other people are doing... what's the point?

I really don't want to be mean, but surely you see the irony in the fact that you took time to post this. :ohwell:

and yours? :smokin:

bcattoes

I think the world would be a much better place if everyone would focus as much energy on themselves that they do on what other people are doing... just my two cents... I have a very busy fulfilled life to spend so much unneccessary energy focused on what other people are doing... what's the point?

I really don't want to be mean, but surely you see the irony in the fact that you took time to post this. :ohwell:

and yours? :smokin:

I never said I don't have the time to spend on what other people are doing. Why would I be on this forum if I didn't?? (see the irony now?)

damcool

Thank you very much...