Why are some people afraid to leave their FOOD diary open?

bunchesonothing

If all of you are self conscious about strangers on the boards making nasty comments, why don't you just make your diary available to friends only? That's what I do. I know my friends will give me great feedback. And honestly, if someone is negative and nasty, you don't want them as a friend anyway, do you?

And if you're not looking for tips, pointers and what not... what's the point?

AngelsKisses75

I don't understand why some people are afraid to leave their food diary open. I, for one, would love to see what the bigger losers are eating that may help me change my ways. I don't care how many calories you eat OR don't eat in a day. That part is your business. I just want to see maybe what I am doing wrong, if anything.

Are they afraid of criticism? Understood, but you can choose to ignore the criticism.

Sorry....just my little rant.

I'm off my soapbox now and back in my corner. ; )

Not everyone is strong enough to answer to questions, or hurtful comments. Not everyone is prepared to have this part of their life out on the table.

This site is about comfort and what works for everyone. If people want to keep their diary private then that is where they keep their comfort zone, and who are we to tell them they are wrong?

I keep mine open to my friends as a personal choice. I am thankful to have that as an option, just as much as I am to know my friends are able to define their own comfort zones.

kenzietea

Mine isn't private, but it is password protected. I give my password to opinions I trust, and people that simply are just curious and want to view my diary. I don't see why it matters if people keep their diary public or private. I am sure they have their reasons. If you want to know why their food diary is private, how about you ask them why? For me, it is a control thing. I am not a control freak about anything, except my issues with food. I previously suffered an eating disorder and honestly, if people were criticizing me constantly for what I was eating, or if I wasn't eating enough, or for any other reason, I wouldn't handle it well.

Fesse

Last time I checked this site was a tool for us all to use as WE, the individual, sees fit.

Surround yourself with friends that have an open diary but please do not criticize those that have a closed one for personal reasons or other wise.

Some of MY friends have ED's and I respect their wishes to have their diaries closed and I take offense to your comment.

nickiog

i leave mine open because i kind of like the feedback i get from friends. i think if someone where to come at me in a negative superior manner then i would just let them know where they can go and what they can do when they get there

also i am in recovery for and eating disorder and i know accountability is a very important part of my recovery so thats another reason for me personally.

and i dont knock people that choose to keep it closed. i think its a matter of comfort.

samcee

Mine isn't closed because fear criticism - I just use it as a tool for myself so nobody needs to see it. If I need advice on what I am eating, I will happily open it, but I don't currently feel that is the case.

I'm surprised that people actually care about this.

Me too.

I'm wondering why people are so mad about it. Just search for people with their diary open and ignore the ones that has it closed. Problem solved. It's no biggie.

elliecolorado

First of all OP, your diary isn't public, so I don't understand why you are ranting about people who don't have an open diary?!?!?

Mine is only set to friends only. I had it public for a while and got rude comments from people i didn't even know about what I was eating. I allow my friends to see it because they know if something is going on in my life that is out of the ordinary, they know if I just had a bad day and don't judge. But when random strangers are judging me based on looking at a day or a few days without knowing anything about me, it wasn't worth it to me.

Fesse

i donno why either. it kinda makes me mad

Your diary is closed

I agree! That drives me nuts!

as is yours
Why is it the people that are all against closed diarys have closed diarys?

Fear I LOVE YOU!!! Nuff said (.)

bunchesonothing

I think there are a lot of people here who believe that people who don't do it aren't "STRONG" or care too much.

Frankly ummm, some people are a little more private.

And if it doesn't serve me a purpose, in this case, I won't do it just to serve other people's voyeuristic needs.

Hollycat

My body, my business. What goes into it...also my business.

Fat people are free-for-all targets for busybodies, blame-deflectors, naturally thin people that believe they're superior intellectually, not to mention your average know-it-alls that just like to hear their own voice. Frankly, some of the worst offenders I've encountered are ex-fatties that think in black and white [my way or the highway]. Some of them actually lurk on this forum. If you're not sure it's you, google "black and white thinking".

I've been subjected to unsolicited advice and open criticism for decades regarding a wide range of topics...from what I put into my mouth to what I wear, to the way I walk, to the type of exercise I choose. I've become so darn prickly because of it, I'm amazed when it still happens. Like most fat people, I read everything about food, nutrition and exercise that comes along and I know how many calories are in a peanut [6 to 8, depending on whether dry-roasted or honey or whatever]. I'd bet a nickle I know more about food and nutrition than the average 'normal' person, so when they deign to slip in a little "well-intentioned" advice, my wall of thorns tends to go up automatically. The way I choose to put my vast knowledge on the subject into action [or not] is my business. When I need advice, I will ask for it. I do not choose to invite it.

Also...I don't know you and you don't know me.

Yes. I have resentment and privacy issues. Them's my boundaries. Tuff.

I'm really ticked with myself right now, because I just blogged about Black & White thinking and I accidentally deleted it..

Hollycat
:flowerforyou:

KlassyKassi

i personally do it to drive people nuts

Haha...love that!

PJilly

I don't understand why some people are afraid to leave their food diary open. I, for one, would love to see what the bigger losers are eating that may help me change my ways. I don't care how many calories you eat OR don't eat in a day. That part is your business. I just want to see maybe what I am doing wrong, if anything.

Are they afraid of criticism? Understood, but you can choose to ignore the criticism.

Sorry....just my little rant.

I'm off my soapbox now and back in my corner. ; )

I think there are many different reasons for people not leaving their food diaries open. It's such an awesome tool in that it can be personalized for however an individual wants to use it. Some use it to track what they've even so they can go back and learn from what they've done. I use it to plan my meals for the day so that I meet my goals. Depending on how someone uses it, it may or may not be helpful to them or others to have it open.

PJilly

What they've "eaten," not what they've "even." I need to read my stuff before I post it, not after.

syates83

I guess, I hadn't given it that much thought. I leave mine open because I appreciate it when other people do the same. Especially people that I look up to...I'm just getting started but its nice to get ideas from other people's food diary that have previously been in my shoes and are now at their goal weight or close to it!

kapeluza

Mine is open and I could care less what anyone thinks about what I eat. It's my diet, my life, I could care less what anyone else thinks if the only thing they are doing is being negative and not giving constructive criticism. .

sethmazzola

I don't know how to open it. I'm brutally honest with mine.

Bella0608

mine was closed when I first joined I think thats because I didnt really know what I was doing lol
but really each to their own! everyones different does it really matter that much??

SabrinaG1986

Whatever on my profile is private is because it's that way by default. I think my diarys open? I have no idea I think I opened it if not only to friends. I've never seen anybody be mean on here though, and I've never gotten rude messages so IDK. I was just thinking yesterday how everybody on MFP seems so encouraging.

Jennloella

I'm naturally a little more private and I only let things go when I'm good and ready.

I've made some healthier choices(got rid of soda, largely) and I'm eating smaller sizes, except for dinner. However, I don't follow NEARLY all of the rules I've seen posted on here. Seriously, by some people's measurements, my body type should be way different. Except it's not. Admittedly, there still are many things I know I could be doing better. Little steps at a time.

However, I'm mostly not looking for anyone's advice anymore. At least not advice that you need to look at my diary for.

Flat out, it's really no one's business what I'm eating, unless I make it their business. So, no offense,

ditto. I think if someone is having big losses, just message them and ask them what they're doing. why be mad that some people are more private than others?

minnie86

Mine was private by default, and I changed it after I realized

dls06

I don't understand why some people are afraid to leave their food diary open. I, for one, would love to see what the bigger losers are eating that may help me change my ways. I don't care how many calories you eat OR don't eat in a day. That part is your business. I just want to see maybe what I am doing wrong, if anything.

Are they afraid of criticism? Understood, but you can choose to ignore the criticism.

Sorry....just my little rant.

I'm off my soapbox now and back in my corner. ; )

Mine is open, but there are days that I dont log it because I know I was wrong that day, and I dont want to discourage anyone else.

No its not open.

dls06

Mine was private by default, and I changed it after I realized

No it's not.

SabrinaG1986

I just opened it lol.

Heather75

Honestly, it boggles my mind that anyone would care what a complete stranger was eating. At a restaurant, do you go from table to table, asking everyone what they have ordered?

As has been said, if it is important to you, only have people on your friends list with open diaries. I just can't understand why it matters.

dls06

Mine is open and I could care less what anyone thinks about what I eat. It's my diet, my life, I could care less what anyone else thinks if the only thing they are doing is being negative and not giving constructive criticism. .

Nope it's not open.

minnie86

For those who would like to share it and it was set private by default

click on "Food" tab
click on "Settings" tab
and chose whether your want to keep open, just for friends, etc

hunny1978

I was using this from an app on my android. there are no options to keep it open or closed. It's just there.

LorinaLynn

Mine's open, but I don't think anyone is "afraid" to have it open. I think they just don't think it's anyone's business. And it's not.

Sharing it or not sharing it is a choice.

Mindful_Trent

Mine isn't closed because fear criticism - I just use it as a tool for myself so nobody needs to see it. If I need advice on what I am eating, I will happily open it, but I don't currently feel that is the case.

I'm surprised that people actually care about this.

^^ This

I've had mine open and had mine closed. For now, it's closed, because it's a tool I'm using for my own purposes. It has nothing to do with anyone else. There's nothing wrong with having an open diary, and there's nothing wrong with having a closed diary. It's a bit ridiculous that some people think others should feel obligated to keep their diary open or get mad/upset/irritated when people make the choice to keep it closed. We all have different personalities, different preferences, and at the end of the day each person has to do what works best for him/herself.

BabyDuchess

I can't speak for everyone but I'm not afraid to open it, I just don't feel anyone on here has the right to be self-appointed food police. And every time we congratulate someone for going under their food goal, we are telling them it's okay not to eat right. MFP has a deficit built in so you'll lose weight without any exercise and if you don't eat the minimum of calories required, I personally don't think that is a good thing. I also make it a rule not to go into anyone's food diary because once again, I don't feel I am qualified or have the right to comment on their choices. We are here for our own reasons and even though I believe in mutual support from my MFP friends, I don't feel policing their diaries is supportive. Each to their own but it's not for me and I do think it's a bit unfair of anyone to assume that closed diaries = fear. :flowerforyou: