Big Black Women

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  • Kanohane
    Kanohane Posts: 112 Member
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    I don't think Beyonce is overweight.
    Beyonce is not overweight...wtf....she's just not "anorexic" like most t.v girls...
  • MrsGoHard
    MrsGoHard Posts: 150 Member
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    Let me be clear.
    A woman can be beautiful and be over-weight, but don't tell me she is beautiful BECAUSE she is overweight.

    I uh... can see why that was said but.... Let me just say this...

    I love this topic. It's one that I haven't seen MUCH on MFP, but it interests me because I've seen the posts where our white sistas complain about their "big fat BUTTS" as if they're a bad thing. (lol)

    It's a black thing. I grew up hoping wishing and praying to be THICK. It's praised and adored. I in fact, STILL want to be THICK, just not in an unhealthy way like I am now. It's deep rooted and an ancestral symbol of fertility and wealth. Women who were thicker (more body fat or perceived body fat) were able [or thought to be able] to carry babies (or more sons) for our men and procreate. Men WITH these women were seen as wealthy and verile because they could feed these thick mamas and please them too. (heh heh) and they were looked up to and admired. During slavery, these women were even cut certain "breaks" because their masters were attracted to their "hyper-sexual" body shapes. The masters would sleep with these women and treat them like they were walking breasts and butts, then they would go to bed with their own wives and talk down about the slaves to keep their wives secure. --- so that's how down the line we (the black community) got the idea that "thicka-than-a-snicka" was the WAY to be, while our while brothas and sistas were thinking the opposite. Different regions and cultures from wayyyyy back, and then from when we first got here in America. So there's NO DOUBT that it's not only encouraged, but congratulated and sought after to be "big".

    I understand the frustration behind the OP's rant, but to go so far as to say Beyonce was overweight.... really? WHERE? lol

    The bottom line is that we ALL must be happy with US. I noticed the OP mentioned Monique. I feel a few ways about her book and about how the OP mentioned it. Do you consider yourself a skinny B****? If so, worrying about what Monique or ANY woman fat, skinny, or otherwise has to say about you is the LEAST of your worries. A b**** is a female dog. Why would you identify with that? So on that note FAT B******* are evil, PURPLE B****** are evil, and so on and so forth. You are what you answer to.

    There is a deep rooted preference for thicker women in our culture. Yet our culture and the inhabitants and participators of it do not have to live your life. Live and BE the way that's healthy for YOU, and don't apologize for it. When I decided to lose weight, it was because my precious heart could no longer take the drama of the extra weight. So YES... I am beautiful and overweight AND I am beautiful BECAUSE I'm overweight.... But I will be beautiful at WHATEVER weight, because I've already decided that I am.
  • MrsGoHard
    MrsGoHard Posts: 150 Member
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    The majority of America is fat...Blacks and Latinos are both a minority...so....who's the other percentage?

    This isn't a contest of "who's the fattest?"....
  • jsapninz
    jsapninz Posts: 909 Member
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    Wow, that's a perspective I had never thought about! I frequently think people are being over sensitive when they bring up race differences...but I certainly think you have some real grounds in your argument. And I live in Montana, where there are like NO black people (I wish we had a little more cultural variety here :frown: ), but I STILL feel like I have felt the influence you are talking about.

    Good for you lady, soldier on, soldier on! :flowerforyou:
  • Kassieisproud
    Kassieisproud Posts: 149
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    You know what word ive grown to despise because of this issue? "Thick" Ugh i hate it now! Ive always been called "Thick" ive been told so many times that thick is beautiful but i was NOT happy at all when i was "Thick" and i had the boobs the butt and the thighs I hated them all so much but i was at such conflict with myself Everyone else thinks its beautiful why don't i? After figuring out i was never going to be able to accept myself that way I got Fit and i love it my breast shrunk along with my butt my thighs are now toned (my mom says im starting to look like a boy -__-)
  • Kassieisproud
    Kassieisproud Posts: 149
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    Love the post!!!
  • delilah47
    delilah47 Posts: 1,658
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    You go girl!:glasses:
  • twynzmom
    twynzmom Posts: 172
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    well said!
  • Miss_Krissy87
    Miss_Krissy87 Posts: 214 Member
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    I think everyone should have their own opinion on everything.. there maybe some people out there that doesn't think beyonce is overweight.. I don't know how much she weighs.. She don't look overweight.. but everything is according to your bmi..I think everyone should be proud to be who they are.. and if you don't like youself change it.. but people should't worry about what other people are doing.. if they want to live their life that way they have the right to.. and women and men have their preference on who they think they look good.. i know alot of men who don't like skinny women..everyone is different on who they like and who they don't .. and everyone should respect that...
  • shaky115
    shaky115 Posts: 43 Member
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    I
  • shaky115
    shaky115 Posts: 43 Member
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    I

    I agree with you 100%. It shouldnt be this way but it is...You were able to express exactly what I have been thinking. TY for putting this post out here.
  • Anomalia
    Anomalia Posts: 506 Member
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    I have to admit, I am slightly afraid to participate in this thread.
  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
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    this is when everyone went crazy and called her "fat"
    2nur3mo.jpg

    and this is from an article where there they talk about her "hot pants and sexy dance moves" with NO mention of her weight
    zybmo5.jpg

    Both of them are very beautiful women.

    I don't think women should be told that they have to gain or lose weight in order to be beautiful. Why can't we just be at the weight that's healthy for us and be beautiful? Why should we be pressured to be anything other than healthy?

    However, when I gained 50 lbs and I felt horrible about myself, I must admit that I loved having African American men still telling me that I was beautiful. And, they were pretty good looking too, so that just made it that much better! :blushing:
  • Vicky0125
    Vicky0125 Posts: 4
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    I'm also a plus sized black woman.I've been on this roller coaster ride before. The first time that I lost weight, I was told to stop losing weight because I looked sick. That did get in my head and I gained the weight back. Now I have high blood pressure and diabetes (temporarily). Yes, I love me know matter what my size but this time its about being a healthier me and getting off the medications, which hopefully will be on my next doctors visit. I totally agree that the expectations for black females are different but it's up to all of us to take control of our health.
  • Nucky719
    Nucky719 Posts: 143
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    Please do not let the OP's comment about Beyonce throw you off the very valid points she's making. As a biracial woman my white family is constantly on me about gaining weight and getting "big" while my black boyfriend says if I lose weight I will have no booty and my black friends say I will look like a bobblehead. At the end of the day I have to do what's going to make ME happy!
  • liftingheavy
    liftingheavy Posts: 551 Member
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    I remember reading an article years ago about a study whose conclusion was that African-American women don't tie their self-esteem as closely to their weight as do caucasian women of similar ages. OP's post just reminded me of that article. Not being AA myself, I don't know if that study was accurate or not. Interesting though!

    I read a similar study. Based upon my friends and observations, I think Black women do suffer from self esteem issues due to size, but are much harder to read, and they gain pseudo acceptance/affirmation by other overweight Black women and a percentage of Black men.

    I also think weight goals are much lower for White women then Black women however. It seems Black women would like to be slimmer and curvy, and White women want to be slim.

    A good visual is comparing the Real Housewives of Atlanta vs. the Real Housewives of Orange County, if you are into those shows, not saying I am...:embarassed:
  • liftingheavy
    liftingheavy Posts: 551 Member
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    I have to admit, I am slightly afraid to participate in this thread.

    Uh uh, don't be. I think honest discussions about these things is good, answers questions that we all probably have. I have a few myself, but don't want to derail the thread!
  • Crystalball78
    Crystalball78 Posts: 72
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    In all honesty, America is FAT, and it has been getting fatter since the '70s at a terrifying rate. EVEN ASIANS ARE FAT IN AMERICA!! This applies to ALL races in America; if you don't believe it, take a look at some photos of people in the early 70s or before -- yourself, your family, any random people at all--how do they look? a bit different than the general population today, eh?

    We are fat because we eat junk. We make excuses that it's cheaper, easier, whatever, but it is what it is. My great grandmother had 14 children. FOURTEEN CHILDREN. She lived on a farm and they grew all their own food. She did not have a car, she did not have a dishwasher, she did not have INDOOR PLUMBING. She was poor. She was thin.

    Poor people used to be thin. Now poor people are fat? No. Americans are fat because we have become lazy and forgotten what real food is and how to prepare it.

    Tell you what, a few years ago I visited Armenia 3 times. I am 5'4 and weighed about 130 lbs (right what I weigh now) at the time. I was a fitness instructor then, as I am now. Guess what? I was F-A-T in Armenia. My luggage was lost and after 5 days I went to shop for a new skirt. I could not fit in size large there. That's right, Miss Size 4 (American fake-vanity size 4, of course) could not fit into an Armenian size large.

    They do not have McDonald's, they do not use microwaves, they do not have partially hydrogenated oils or even prepared foods in their grocery stores! You want a jar of spaghetti sauce? forget it! Buy some tomatoes, onions and herbs and make it yourself. Interesting, in the capital city, Yerevan, there are very few middle class people--you see rich people in Hummers, and you see old ladies walking with donkeys, but NO ONE IS FAT.

    There is no solution in "accepting" that you will always be fat, or that your certain race is meant to be fat, or skinny or whatever.

    You control what you eat. You decide what to buy. A meal at McDonald's for my family of 6 is NOT cheap. It would cost over $45 and have essentially no nutritional value. However, tonight I will grill a 2-lb. organic marinated tri tip from Whole Foods for about $23, a 1/4 lb. of cabbage slaw from their salad bar ($1.75) and a bag of organic tortillas for about $4. I will make guacamole from 2 avocados ($1.50) a some chopped onion and tomato and a squeeze of lemon. Also I think I will grill some asparagus (2.99 for a pound), and serve some fresh strawberries and raspberries ($5 from farmers market).

    So tonight for LESS THAN $40, my family of 6 will enjoy tri-tip soft tacos with homemade guacamole, asparagus, and fresh berries for dinner. And we will have leftovers for lunch tomorrow.

    blessings.
    I agree with this 100%. I am and have always been the biggest of all the people my age in my family. it is because of the choices I made in my life not because of what someone said. African Ammerican woman are not known to be overweight, they are known for having curves. It's all about choices and people need to be held accountable for themselves and stop putting the blame on what the world thinks you should be.
  • JACKYGETNMYBODYBACK
    JACKYGETNMYBODYBACK Posts: 91 Member
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    you are on point with the word "THICK" I hate the word and guys used it like its a compliment.
  • antoniosmooth
    antoniosmooth Posts: 299 Member
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    Obviously being a black man I understand the original poster's thread which illustrates some very good points. Where I grew up in south central Los Angeles there was a fine line from curvy/thick and overweight. Remember the song by the Commodores, Brick House (when Lionel Richie was still the lead singer)

    She's a brick----house
    She's the one, the only one,
    who's built like a amazon
    We're together everybody knows,
    This is how the story goes.

    She knows she got everything a woman needs....... to get a man, yeah.
    How can she lose with what she use
    36-24-36, what a winning hand!
    Cause she's a Brick
    HOUSE!

    Most men I know (black, white, and asian) prefer a woman with at the very least some curves, that desirable hourglass figure. 36-24-36 is not overweight in my personal opinion. I'm wondering if the desire for overweight women (black/white/otherwise) is a geographic/regional condition.

    However I will admit (something that has been discussed in this thread), it appears there is a demographic sociological standpoint to body image in black culture. For example where I currently live in the Seattle area my gym (24 Hour Fitness) is in my estimation for males 45% black 50% white 5% Asian, however for females 80% white 10% black 10% Asian.

    There is a fine line in the media for weight in terms of black women. Beyonce is and has always been considered sexy because of her curves whereas Oprah has been considered fat a majority of the time.

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