The QUIT KIDDING YOURSELF thread!

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  • MattGetsMad
    MattGetsMad Posts: 429 Member
    [/quote]
    It can be applied to so much in life. I have a cousin who does nothing, but complain about how much the government is spending on government jobs...................and he works for the government.
    [/quote]

    lol!
  • maryjay51
    maryjay51 Posts: 742
    i see people using weight machines and practically filing their nails while they do it.. it kills me to see it because i know they are wasting their time. i got a trainer in july of 2010 and never looked back to those days of not knowing what the heck i was doing and thinking i did. i didnt become obese because i was doing the right thing! my trainer is my savior and taught me so much. he isnt afraid to set me straight when i get cocky either. we have a love hate relationship and i wouldnt give him up for anything. he is worth every dime so that i work over time to pay for his services,knowledge and support
  • valeriebpdx
    valeriebpdx Posts: 497 Member
    Thanks for this, Ninerbuff--it's a good reminder. I am not weak, so the amount of weight I am lifting usually looks good/adequate compared to other women, but I usually lift 2 sets of 15 even though I want to get stronger. I know I need to sack up and be lifting heavier (and shake off the mild fear that I will be pinned under a barbell after chest presses someday--some big dude would help me, right?). I am a runner, but I want to focus on getting stronger this year and finally getting the extra weight off, not building endurance. I always enjoy and appreciate your posts.

    The thing about women wearing clothes too small is a continual source of bafflement to me. Someday peek in on a "how much do you weigh and what size clothes do you wear" thread here--it's astounding. Women who are 180 talking about size 8 pants blow my mind. What must those poor pants look like, holding on for dear life like that?
  • dad106
    dad106 Posts: 4,868 Member
    The thing about women wearing clothes too small is a continual source of bafflement to me. Someday peek in on a "how much do you weigh and what size clothes do you wear" thread here--it's astounding. Women who are 180 talking about size 8 pants blow my mind. What must those poor pants look like, holding on for dear life like that?

    When I weighed 180, I wore a size 8.. and I can tell you for a fact that my pants were not holding on for dear life. They fit fine because I found the right cut for my body at that time.

    Don't see why it's so mind blowing.. a lot of people who are that weight can wear a size 8. It all depends on the brand and fit of the pant.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    So the "New Year's Resolutioners" were in today in force! And man, many were being very overzealous in than what their actual fitness state really was. I had to help 3 individuals out who got dizzy and needed to sit.


    If you are NEW, then go easy. It's not a race.


    A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    So working out with a new client who has been stuck for over 3 months, 2 weeks ago I bombarded her with weights she's never used before. Yesterday after working out with her (we meet every 2 weeks) we spoke for a few minutes and she told me that she couldn't believe that for this long she thought she was working out really hard...............until our first session. EX: she used to squat with 30lbs on her back. Our first session, I loaded it up to 70lbs. She was really apprehensive, but did it. She is now convinced that she was "kidding herself" that she wasn't able to lift heavy and that's why she stuck to all the light weights. She's already seen a 3lb drop where she hasn't seen any weight movement for 5 months.
    No fear, no doubt, no light weights!!!

    A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    Just a reminder that if you think you're really working hard, eating correctly, and getting enough rest, but aren't getting results from measurements and weight loss, then you're probably kidding yourself on at least one of the 3. Buck up and reassess.


    A.C.E. Certified Personal & Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    And yesterday..................

    There's a guy who always tries to talk to me about fitness how IMPORTANT it is and how Crossfit is probably the best way to get fit doing it. I see him deadlifting (with a rounded back) and then later he's gone for about 15 minutes from the rack. I see him return later and when he speaks to me there's a DISTINCT smell of cigarette on his breath. Didn't know he smoked until just then.

    Dude, quit kidding yourself.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • kristen6022
    kristen6022 Posts: 1,923 Member
    I agree that being able to laugh and carry on while you are working out is kinda week, but when women start out after not doing anything for a long time, 5-8 dumbells are all we can do at first. Now, granted, I'm up to 12's (lighter for shoulders because I have weak shoulders that I'm working on). I've always felt that form was better than heavy weight. If I can do a 8 full squats with 20 pounds total in my hands, or 8 1/2 squats with 40, I'm gonna go with the first scenario. I do all of my weight training at home, don't lift heavy, but I max out around 10 reps. I have great form and control. I'm good with it. And I'm seeing results.
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
    Unfortunately, you can only help those who want to help themselves. I have a friend who is at least 50 lbs overweight, but keeps telling me over and over how she can't lose, but is exercising and "I'm eating really good and healthy"

    I've tried gently to tell her that she's still doing SOMETHING wrong, because she wouldn't be stuck if she was doing things the right way. I even told her how I thought I was eating good before i joined MFP and started tracking, but even though I've lost 37 lbs, it hasn't managed to inspire her enough..and that makes me sad!

    I suspect some people just like to live in denial, because its easier than doing the work to change things!
  • catshark209
    catshark209 Posts: 1,133 Member
    I posted on my feed yesterday, and you probably saw it, about a hanger-on I had. She goes to the gym and gets on the treadmill, and expects to be able to talk and gossip with me. I told her I was there to work out and she got butt hurt.
    I saw girls in full makeup and jewelry and matching tops giggle on the treadmills....all the while giving me dirty looks cuz I was killing it.

    Yeah I don't know why these people complain about no results when they won't do anything else.
  • TaylorsGranddad
    TaylorsGranddad Posts: 453 Member
    All I can say look at the sweat in my profile pic... as for chatting When me and the Mrs go running we do chat at the start, but it soon stops as the concentration kicks in...along with the fact of breathing too.


    If your not sweating, it can't be working as well as it could be, and a gym is a place to work out, should you want to socailse go to a bar.
  • BrianSharpe
    BrianSharpe Posts: 9,248 Member
    When I read the OP the first thing I thought of was the "fat burning zone" on all those cardio machines and the pour souls slowly trudging along on treadmills thinking that they're getting a workout (yes it's better than sitting on your butt doing nothing but..........what's worse is that there's a legion of misguided/misinformed PTs propagating this myth)
  • emmygrace2012
    emmygrace2012 Posts: 44 Member
    Everyone wants results. Few want to work for them!
  • onyx1972
    onyx1972 Posts: 133 Member
    OK, well I just started trying to lift and I was told to start light... what weight should I use because 5 lb to 7lb is what I am using.. I have lost 55 lbs doing cardio (most of that before I joined MFP) but it has stalled... so if you are saying that is not effort although it is hard as hell for me to do, what weight do I start with?
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    I agree that being able to laugh and carry on while you are working out is kinda week, but when women start out after not doing anything for a long time, 5-8 dumbells are all we can do at first. Now, granted, I'm up to 12's (lighter for shoulders because I have weak shoulders that I'm working on). I've always felt that form was better than heavy weight. If I can do a 8 full squats with 20 pounds total in my hands, or 8 1/2 squats with 40, I'm gonna go with the first scenario. I do all of my weight training at home, don't lift heavy, but I max out around 10 reps. I have great form and control. I'm good with it. And I'm seeing results.
    Starting out lighter is fine. These 2 were consistent members whom I saw on a daily basis. To say that they were "good" with their lifting showed that they actually define it much differently than those who are getting results with much higher effort.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    I posted on my feed yesterday, and you probably saw it, about a hanger-on I had. She goes to the gym and gets on the treadmill, and expects to be able to talk and gossip with me. I told her I was there to work out and she got butt hurt.
    I saw girls in full makeup and jewelry and matching tops giggle on the treadmills....all the while giving me dirty looks cuz I was killing it.

    Yeah I don't know why these people complain about no results when they won't do anything else.
    People confuse "effort" with results all the time.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    When I read the OP the first thing I thought of was the "fat burning zone" on all those cardio machines and the pour souls slowly trudging along on treadmills thinking that they're getting a workout (yes it's better than sitting on your butt doing nothing but..........what's worse is that there's a legion of misguided/misinformed PTs propagating this myth)
    Yep. I'll never throw them under the bus in front of a client, but if a PT where I work stated that and I over heard it, I'd have a private conversation on why they actually believe it. I don't think any of my peers here do (since most of them pretty much work their clients out pretty hard), but I'll agree with you on the legion that do pass that info on.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • I laugh at the gym all the time... But it's a gasping, choked sort of chuckle at myself as I'm getting my *kitten* shredded by a trainer! ;)
  • cmorga02
    cmorga02 Posts: 34 Member
    PREACH IT!
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    OK, well I just started trying to lift and I was told to start light... what weight should I use because 5 lb to 7lb is what I am using.. I have lost 55 lbs doing cardio (most of that before I joined MFP) but it has stalled... so if you are saying that is not effort although it is hard as hell for me to do, what weight do I start with?
    You start light to acclimate to the movements, learn the form and not get too sore so you don't get discouraged to do it. Now what ever exercise you're doing, you use a weight resistance that allow 8 reps max with good form for any given exercise. You should be able to do more with legs and back compared with arms.
    Also really think about the weight. Curling 10lbs total for some is CONSIDERED hard, but carrying around a 20lbs baby is much easier to do all day?

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    I laugh at the gym all the time... But it's a gasping, choked sort of chuckle at myself as I'm getting my *kitten* shredded by a trainer! ;)
    That's the laugh of pain! I get it all the time.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • Jezebel9
    Jezebel9 Posts: 396 Member
    People go through all sorts of illusions when trying to change themselves. But I understand the 'fake it til ya make it' concept.

    From being a therapist for awhile, I noticed how people rumble and grumble a lot before they actually change... like an earthquake that is getting ready to do something- it might take years or lifetimes, but eventually a change will happen that counts. Meanwhile, those in the helping professions (trainers, therapists, health care professionals) are asked to listen to the rumblings while the person gets ready to do it. Very frustrating when we are ready for them to be healthy now. I know.

    BTW-Men do this too- like doing 'elbow bends' instead of actual push ups.

    My advice? How can you really help?
    Adopt a phrase you use repeatedly with the person- (repetition is remembered) "you are cheating yourself"
    be compassionate and honest- tell the truth without blame or judgement. "you are not doing much working out here"
    Patience
    Realize you cannot help everyone.
    Respect another person's right to live their life the way they choose.
    Set clear boundaries for your own health and well being. (Sort of like triage- help the ones you can, leave the others behind)

    Good luck.
    :happy:
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    Everyone wants results. Few want to work for them!
    Which is probably why many quit. A lot of overweight people think that we are just "born" this way and don't have the stresses and issues they have.
    Hate to tell them that "lean" people have stresses and issues too. We just tend to deal with them differently. For me I deal with crazy stress by kickboxing on a bag for 30 minutes. For others it's spin or running.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,028 Member
    People go through all sorts of illusions when trying to change themselves. But I understand the 'fake it til ya make it' concept.

    From being a therapist for awhile, I noticed how people rumble and grumble a lot before they actually change... like an earthquake that is getting ready to do something- it might take years or lifetimes, but eventually a change will happen that counts. Meanwhile, those in the helping professions (trainers, therapists, health care professionals) are asked to listen to the rumblings while the person gets ready to do it. Very frustrating when we are ready for them to be healthy now. I know.

    BTW-Men do this too- like doing 'elbow bends' instead of actual push ups.

    My advice? How can you really help?
    Adopt a phrase you use repeatedly with the person- (repetition is remembered) "you are cheating yourself"
    be compassionate and honest- tell the truth without blame or judgement. "you are not doing much working out here"
    Patience
    Realize you cannot help everyone.
    Respect another person's right to live their life the way they choose.
    Set clear boundaries for your own health and well being. (Sort of like triage- help the ones you can, leave the others behind)

    Good luck.
    :happy:
    I use all the techniques you mention. Thanks for letting others see it.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • sarantonio
    sarantonio Posts: 880 Member
    I have recently found my love of working out... no gym yet, I'm intimidated, and I dont have the fnances for it ATM. But I have a small group of moms who saw my success (25 pounds lost) and wanted to hop on the band-wagon with me, I am so proud of them for trying, but I feel like they are holding me back, 3 miles in 50 minutes??? Thats not even trying! Or "kickboxing" (some cheap generic video), I'm the only one red, panting and drenched with sweat... and you know what? They pick on ME.. saying Im doing extra jumping around and I'm "too GUNG-HO" Cheating themselves... oh boy, yes they are.
  • very true.. i like to think 'if it doesnt challenge you, it wont change you'.
  • karylee44
    karylee44 Posts: 892
    well, than my gasping for breath, gritting my teeth and sweating from head to toe.. must be a good thing.
    i have NO desire to carry on a conversation while exercising.
    im alway trying to up my weights..
  • bxbutterfly
    bxbutterfly Posts: 47 Member
    this was a good smack in the face and also confirmation on what i was telling myself last night. yesterday i had a good workout and realized i need to up my intensity if i want to see the results i expect.

    thanks for this post.
  • iWaffle
    iWaffle Posts: 2,208 Member
    BTW-Men do this too- like doing 'elbow bends' instead of actual push ups.
    I love it when a couple wanna-be guys come in and slap on 2 plates on each side and then never let the bar touch their chest when they bench. Or they'll do squats and not even go parallel when I'm going down low enough to sit on my calves.

    [/quote]
    Realize you cannot help everyone.
    [/quote]
    I just use it for motivation to ensure I'm working out correctly. I don't want to be them.
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