Fit For Future Families - September 2011
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Runner- I think I remember you posting something about working with all guys (I hope i'm not tripping) I'm in the same position. Do you find yourself not wanting to let anyone know that you're TTC? I'm getting a little more open about it but in the military pregnant women are considered a liability and right now I'm one of the top performers so I don't want them to think I'm a dirt bag....but based off of comments, they all realize that we'll probably be having kids in the not too distant future.
Well, as a firefighter, I work with all men...including my husband. I have to say I am really nervous about them knowing anything about the subject. My husband knows not to say a word. The younger guys on the department...the ones we see outside of the station and hang out with on a regular basis...treat me "normal". I don't get a lot of special treatment because I'm a girl. Yeah, sure, they don't let me lift a lot of the heavy stuff, but it's because they know I can't...not because I'm a girl. And I like it. I like being one of the guys. I have always been better at being one of the guys than one of the gals...especially when I was in college (and mainly because I can't stand the catiness of most women). I fully intend to make runs on the department, with high discretion, when we are TTC and even while I am pregnant until it's no longer something I can hide...which likely won't be long because you can't hide much more than a 3 or 4 month bump in my gear.
At my main job at the hospital, I work with 90% women...women who have nagged at me..."When are you having kids?" and "What are you waiting for?". My friend from work, KGB (also my age), and I are the only ones WITHOUT kids. And it's almost like we are discriminated against because we don't have kids in the sense that we should be picking up all the open shifts because we aren't going to be missing time with kids if we do. Seriously? It makes me not want to have kids in a certain sense. I really don't want certain people knowing that I am even thinking about TTC...KGB and one other person at work knows (and that's because I'm borrowing some books she has).
I'm also not telling my parents or my in-laws because I have some anxiety over it. Knowing that it's is likely going to be a rough process and I will likely end up on medication to help us conceive makes me leery about who knows and who doesn't. And I hate disappointing my parents...although if I know they won't see it that way. I'm their only child so I feel very pressured to perform well in everything I do...
Bit of a mess, huh?0 -
Random
SO I am taking physical therapy right now, DH and I were training for the St Jude Half, and it turns out that I have bilateral patellaformal syndrome, today is my "Most likely to ovulate day" According to the fertility friend app I use. Anyways, we BD last night, and this morning my therapist had me do 20 minutes on the eliptical... I kept thinking-- Oh no, I'm going to jar his sperm down! LOL.......
Surely not right? Funny how TTC makes you have CRAZY thoughts!0 -
Where you live: South Dakota
i'm originally a south dakota girl too.
lived in the black hills area; went to college in brookings. are you east river or west river? (haha, my husband would say 'are you vikings or broncos?') 0 -
I like that you throw in goals other than physical health. I need to start doing that! Also, about the medication, one of my friends sets herself an alarm and that is when she takes all of her stuff, maybe that would help you? I don't know if you need to take it in the morning or at night, but maybe set an alarm for 20 minutes after your wake up alarm goes off or something like that....just a suggestion
thanks for the suggestion. i am used to the timing, but remembering to take 7 in the morning and 5 at night makes me feel like i need a pill organizer. in the morning, i take metformin, b6, b12, folic acid, imitrex (i've been getting migraines from the hormones, so this is preventative), lexapro (my dad died last year; i am in the process of weaning off of it) and an antibiotic. at night, i take metformin, a prenatal vitamin, three progesterone capules, and the antibiotic. it got complicated when i was on the estrogen because that was 3 pills 3 times a day and i wasn't used to taking anything at lunch. 0 -
SO I am taking physical therapy right now, DH and I were training for the St Jude Half, and it turns out that I have bilateral patellaformal syndrome, today is my "Most likely to ovulate day" According to the fertility friend app I use. Anyways, we BD last night, and this morning my therapist had me do 20 minutes on the eliptical... I kept thinking-- Oh no, I'm going to jar his sperm down! LOL.......
Surely not right? Funny how TTC makes you have CRAZY thoughts!
hahaha, i can relate to thinking things like that. 0 -
Hey eeryone, I promise I will take some time soon and respond to you all!
As for now, my school year just started and I'm already swamped. I have 3 chapters to read for tomorrow - I just found out today!
Thinking of you all! Hugs to those that need it and a high five to those who hit their goals!
karen - I miss you Hun and I'm thinking about you.
J0 -
Hi all! I'm looking for some support as my weight loss goals have shifted to getting healthy before TTC.
Age: 31
Where you live: Hot Springs, Ar but moving to NWA around Christmas
Job: Adjunct Psych Professor and Vocational Counselor
Length of time on the board: I have used MFP on and off for a year... I have lost and gained the same 30 pounds over and over!
Marital Status: 7 months
Length of time you've been with SO: 1 1/2 years
Do you have kids: I have a 5 year old daughter.
Length of time TTC: will start May 2012
Diagnosis: PCOS, Endometriosis
Do you chart your BBT: not yet
Do you use OPKs: not yet
Are you on any meds for TTC: starting prenatals, expect to have to use other treatments later, besides having past fertility problems myself, my husband also has to have a vasectomy reversal done... So it may be a long, expensive battle
Height: 5'6"
Weight: 247
Goal Weight: 150
Strange fact about yourself: I jumped out of the first plane I ever rode in!!0 -
I like that you throw in goals other than physical health. I need to start doing that! Also, about the medication, one of my friends sets herself an alarm and that is when she takes all of her stuff, maybe that would help you? I don't know if you need to take it in the morning or at night, but maybe set an alarm for 20 minutes after your wake up alarm goes off or something like that....just a suggestion
thanks for the suggestion. i am used to the timing, but remembering to take 7 in the morning and 5 at night makes me feel like i need a pill organizer. in the morning, i take metformin, b6, b12, folic acid, imitrex (i've been getting migraines from the hormones, so this is preventative), lexapro (my dad died last year; i am in the process of weaning off of it) and an antibiotic. at night, i take metformin, a prenatal vitamin, three progesterone capules, and the antibiotic. it got complicated when i was on the estrogen because that was 3 pills 3 times a day and i wasn't used to taking anything at lunch.
oh and i forgot the probiotic supplement and calcium chew i take too. duh!
i've heard magnesium and cinnamon tablets are good for women with pcos and insulin resistance, but i don't want to add one more thing to what i already take. ugh!0 -
As for now, my school year just started and I'm already swamped. I have 3 chapters to read for tomorrow - I just found out today!
i hate when i'm not given enough time for absorbing material (i can read 3 chapters in a night but that doesn't mean i'll remember it if i slog through it just to get it done). some professors forget there is life outside of class.0 -
Hey! Not all of us profs are mean! Lol... but maybe that's because the pain of getting through school still gives me nightmares!!0
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Where you live: South Dakota
i'm originally a south dakota girl too. lived in the black hills area; went to college in brookings. are you east river or west river? (haha, my husband would say 'are you vikings or broncos?')
:-) I'm East River... but when my husband and I were first married we lived closer to the hills. His family is from that area so I think I still get the best of both worlds. As far as Vikings or Broncos...yuck! haha. I'm a football fan but I cheer for the Colts. :-)0 -
Age: 23
Where you live: North Carolina
Job: Secretary at my FIL's farm 3days a week and SAHM the rest
Length of time on the board: a few months but just started using it seriously the last week
Marital Status: married
Length of time you've been with SO: 6 years will be married for 4 in November
Do you have kids: 2 boys - JohnPaul 4 and R.E. Lee 18months
Length of time TTC: we are waiting until I lose weight to start
Diagnosis:
Do you chart your BBT: no
Do you use OPKs: no
Are you on any meds for TTC: no
Height: 5'2"
Weight: 189.2 (this morning I started out at 210 in May 2011)
Goal Weight: 110-135 is my healthy range whatever looks best on me
Strange fact about yourself: I cloth diapered my oldest son from 4 months until he pottytrained and I am still clothdiapering my youngest and have been since birth. I had a unmedicated VBAC with my second baby and want to get healthy as I can be before conceiving again because I am interested in a homebirth or atleast a water birth in a hospital but unless I lose weight first I am not going to try it since its too dangerous
My husband and I have planted grapes and blueberries and hope to open our own winery within the next 10 years!! 0 -
Cupcake- as far as HPTs (I'm not too sure about OPKs) I've always been told that they're mostly the same (some one correct me if i'm wrong). The ones that say they get results sooner are usually less accurate. I got a pack of 40 OPKs and 10 HPTs from Amazon for $10. They're generic but had good review. Other ladies here use early-pregnancy-tests.com like Emily said.
Melissa-Welcome!
Emily- Have you just recently started working out more? At the beginning of the year when I jumped on the exercise and diet bandwagon my cycles were all crazy. But after about 4 weird ones they seem to be back to normal, for me at least!
Runner- I totally feel ya on the being without kids and working with mostly moms. Before I had my LO I worked in a pharmacy in a town 30 miles away and even with that much of a drive I was always the first one called when someone didn't show up "its not like you have to find a babysitter or anything" so annoying!!! I don't miss those days.
Jalara- Thinking of you! Hope school is treating you well
Mel- Welcome! Your strange fact is awesome!
mrsmccullen- Welcome to you as well! I love that you did cloth diapers! I might have considered it more if I didn't have such horrible morning sickness when I was pregnant. I didn't want to be nauseated if I could prevent it lol0 -
GBOH-I see why you would get confused with all your meds! It sounds like a pill organizer might be a good idea....I don't take a cinnamon supplament, but after finding out about all the good things it can do for you I've started adding it to a bunch of things. I put it in my coffee in the morning, put it on oatmeal, mix it in with pancakes. It's supposed to be a natural energy source
Runner- I feel like I would go a little nuts at your second job! lol. I don't LOVE working with all guys but I do think I'd prefer it to working with all women LOL
MrsSavvy- That's pretty funny about worrying about working out because of breaking lose the sperm. My husband get's all freaked out when I go to the bathroom shortly after doing the deed for the same reason.
Destar- I have been pretty physically active for at least a year now but lately I've been going way overboard (like a hour and a half with my average heart rate in the 170's. I am going to talk to my doc about it on Tuesday, but regardless of if it's messing with my cycle or not, I feel like mentally I've gone a little overboard with workouts so I need to chill out. I've gotten very obcessive0 -
I've spent the last two nights reading about different charting methods. Because I have PCOS and want to be sure on my results, I am leaning towards the temperature method AND the CM method. I feel confident that I can handle the temperature method but I am a little nervous about observing my CM. Does anyone have experience? Advice? Tips?0
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Ok so I've been avoiding posting about this but here is goes. I have been telling myself that my cycle is messed up because of my working out. Fact be told that last time I had these exact symptoms the doctor told me that it was probably a miscarriage, they are common, most women don't even know they had them, blah blah blah. Well then, I didn't really give it a second thought, I was not in a position to have a child and I wasn't even sure that I wanted kids ever (it was a dark period in my life). Well now, I definitely want kids and I'm trying to have one and regardless of the fact that it's not confirmed as a miscarriage the thought that that is a possible explaination really upsets me! While I was away at children's camp I had a little bleeding and cramping which were just in time for implantation bleeding which of course got my hopes up. Then my period came and I was disappointed but figured i had misunderstood my body, then my period has continued and now I'm thinking I did not misunderstand the symptoms I was pregnant and lost it I feel like I shouldn't be upset because there is no way to confirm that is what happened but guess what, I AM upset. Yesterday I had a good cry and went and binged out on ice cream which did make me feel a little better but not entirely. I haven't talked to my husband about it yet because by the time that I finally let myself accept that was a possibility he was at work and I didnt want to talk to him about it as I was leaving for work this morning. But he knows something is not right. He keeps asking if I'm OK and why I seem so bummed. UGH
I know these things are common (it is my third time after all) and I've heard they don't pull any weight on your ability to conceive they just happen sometimes but why?! Also, yesterday I heard that anti-inflamitory drugs can play a roll in spontaneous miscarriage. As soon as I started TTC I stopped taking naproxyn daily but when my shoulder has hurt REALLY bad I've taken one so now I'm feeling like it's my fault!....This has definitely made it so I wont be taking them anymore, i'll have to see with my doctor about getting another injection and if that would be harmful. BLAH
Sorry, I just needed to let that out. My friend who took me out last night was real sweet to take me to ice cream but it's the same friend that is very against us TTC so I didn't even mention it to her. I just said "I'm bummed for no reason." Not having a good real life support system kinda sucks sometimes! But I'm very glad to have you all
Namaste!0 -
Emily-I had something similar happen...except I never went to a doctor about it because my husband and I weren't married at the time and I was afraid my parents would find out (even though I wasn't a minor anymore). I told my husband (then fiance) about it and he talked to a friend at work about what had happened. His friend said it wasn't a miscarriage...it was something else...so my husband has never believed that I was pregnant. Not that he called me a liar and such, but I think the idea was too hard for him, so I let him believe what his friend told him. I never took a test to confirm pregnancy, but it was this gut feeling that I was pregnant that I couldn't deny. I told a few friends, but they believed the same as my husband, which is totally fine. I don't blame any of them. I didn't have solid proof that I was pregnant, I wasn't ready for a child (in college and not married yet), and I was actually trying to convince myself that my husband's friend was right...but it sucked. In my heart, I still count it as a pregnancy, but for all other purposes (doctors, family, friends, ect), it was just a freak period...because I didn't have the proof of a positive preg test. It's been about 6 years now and I'm ok. God didn't want that pregnancy to happen. And as long as it's God's terms, I am willing to let it be.
If it happened now, I would probably be an inconsolable mess. Even before we talked about having a baby, if I thought I was pregnant and got a BFN, I would mope. But now, I'm pretty sure I would be devastated. Talk to your husband and get his support. You need it. And remember we are all here for you. *hugs*0 -
Happy Friday ladies!!!!
Ahh....life is good. Hubs and i had an amazing vacation and we are both home safe and sound. We still have family in town which is keeping us pretty busy. I went back to work yesterday which was hard bc he gets to lay in bed and sleep in and I get to get up and get P (our 6yr old son) up and ready for school.
I feel like I've missed a lot w u ladies so I will just give a round of high fives and *kitten* slaps to those who met their goals and/or had losses!
Funny story about my vacation/reunion w my hubs. The first words I said to my hubs after being apart for 7 months was "I hate you" haha here is why: so the plan was, I was going to spend the night at my friends house Monday night (the 29th) bc we had to leave for the airport at 4am. By midnight we realized we weren't going to be able to sleep and we decided to leave at 3am and take our time (it was a 3 hour drive to the airport). So we get on the road and in the mix of the 3 hours to the airport and the 5 1/2 hour flight I spilled coffee on my jeans 3 individual times, we got a little drunk at the airport before our flight (love airport bars....mimosas are COMPLETELY acceptable at 9am lol) I slept MAYBE 2 hours on the flight so by the time we arrived in Hawaii I had been up for 36 hours. The ship (USS Ronald Reagan) was supposed to get in around 8 am the next day so I was going to be able to relax, get a massage, take a hot bath, shave my legs and go to bed early before I saw my hubs. So we arrive in Hawaii, dirty, smelly, tired and a little hung over and before we got off the plane I checked our bank account to see if hub's paycheck had posted to our bank account yet. I notice that some money had been spent out of his bank account at a coffee place. All of a sudden it hits me - there is not a "Seattle's best coffee" on the aircraft carrier....I look at my friend and said "my husband is on the island....!" in sheet terror! Apparently i suck at being surprised. Bc of his gallbladder issues he can't fly so they sent him to Hawaii a day early to get stuff ready for the rest of the squadron and he picked us up from the airport. I looked like death warmed over....so after the almost panic attack in the terminal I bought some breath mints and he met us at baggage claim. In a sobbing ball of happy tears the first words I could utter were "I hate you". He appreciate the sentiment Venus it bc he knows what a control freak I am and e knew I had everything planned to the second and he "ruined" it lol.
But! We were able to BD on EVERY potential fertile day and the only real side effect I had from the clomid was for 2 days I felt like my ovaries were the size of grapefruits. I go in for CD21 bloodwork on Monday and can start peeing on sticks on the 20th....fingers crossed!!
Also - Kim CONGRATS on the BFP!!!!0 -
Howdy Everyone,
First off welcome to all the newbies. I hope your stay here is short!
Emily- *hugs* I can't imagine how it would feel to have that occur a potential of 3 times I often deal with people suffering miscarriages at work, and even if they have multiple healthy children at home, they seem totally devistated. They are way more common then people think but they aren't talked about opening due to the emotional ties it seems. Any anti-inflammatories increase the potential for pregnancy problems. Does Tylenol work for you? Many doctors say those are safe during pregnancy if a pain reliever is needed. I had to cut out all antiinflamatories when I was dx with Ulcerative Collitis and trust me I wish for nothing else when my back hurts. nIt sucks when you dont have a lot of RLF's there that support you in your decisions. I'm glad you had an ice cream party and that made you feel a little better. Just remember if it was ment to be it would have happened. Try and keep your chin up!
Runner-I'm with you in working with mostly males. I am a paramedic and have very few female co-workers. I totally agree with it's always God's terms. This job has proved that to me time and time again.
Melissa- Sorry no help with the CM. I just starting paying a little attention to mine myself. Very difficult to find out which is which still.
Alisa- That's soooo awesome. I am the exact same way about surprises and always find a way to ruin them all even if I try really hard not to, I just must be aware and in control of as much as possible
That's so awesome he's home with you now though and the BD was done all the potentially fertile days! I will keep my fingers crossed for you! I hope your hubbs surgery for his gallbladder goes smoothly and quickly. BTW I love your new profile picture!!
AFM- I had a total melt down yesterday. My mind keeps dwelling on silly things and blowing them way out of proportion. I can't seem to brush things off these days. I'm not sure if my body is still trying to regulate itself off meds or if this TTC is starting to driving me coo coo. My husband did eventually make me giggle saying, "You aren't really going crazy...Crazy people don't think they are going crazy so your still sane. And don't worry if you do go crazy I'll still love you I just might laugh at you a little more" I'm glad he was able to pull me out of my moping mess. This has proven to be the 2nd month with no positive OPK's and I've yet to have a temperature shift at all. I am beginning to believe that I'm not ovulating at all. How long did the ladies out there with ovulation issues wait to go see a DR. about it? I'm just feeling quite bummed about it all but trying to keep my chin up.
Babydust to all that want it and fat burning genies to those that want those first!0 -
Retail funny of the day!
Who would believe it was a leather portfolio :laugh:
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Stupid question.... What does AFM mean when you guys are updating?
Just started reading Taking Charge of Your Fertility. I already knew a bit about temping, observing CM, etc... but now I know how much I DIDN'T know. Wow, if you haven't read this yet, go out and get it.
So since I'm taking this WTT (Waiting To Try) thing pretty seriously I've started some supplements, DHA, prenatals, C and calcium so that's kinda fun, I'm sorta prepping my body at this point. But I have quite a few goals to achieve before I can try to get knocked up:
#1 Remove wisdom teeth. This has to be done this year or I forfeit my FSA. I'm sooooooooo freaked out about this but I'm tired of the problems they give me and I can't have any serious issues while pregnant, I will be so pissed if they start hurting and I can't take anything for the pain.
#2 Lose at least 15 lbs. I want to be able to enjoy pregnancy as much as possible and be healthy as possible. I really don't want to not know if I have a baby bump or if it's just my fat belly and I want to prevent as many possible complications as I can.
#3 Get my first tattoo for my 30th birthday (next month). I want to do this because obviously I don't want to do this while pregnant or BFing. Problem is I have an idea of what I want but it's vague. I have no idea how to figure this out.
#4 Save money. Starting a family is totally expensive! I will need a new car at some point (this 2 door thing is NOT going to work) and of course my insurance doesn't cover much of the birth, not sure what good it is.
So those are the big ones... in the mean time my weekly goals are getting freakin' flexy.... need to really get into more yoga, I am having trouble getting myself to go to the classes, same with my dance classes I want to start. I'm SUCH a wuss. Total ball of social anxiety so I make an excuse not to go. It's getting old.
My diet has been good, finally got back down to where I was a couple weeks ago after falling off the wagon. I've cut out almost all sugars that aren't fruit except for my nightly dark chocolate fix. No more processed foods, need to work on getting more protein in, not a big meat eater, I'd rather just eat a bowl or rice. Mmm... carbs. Also, need to drink more water. Why is this so hard???
Keep up 30 Day Shred. Just started it again after a failed attempt a couple months ago that got interrupted by vacations and too much fun. I'm not going to try to do it everyday, my goal is just to get some sort of exercise everyday and days I don't get something else I'll do 30DS. Baby steps.
Need to start my acupuncture treatments for general health, fertility health and all that good stuff. This I can probably do on days I go into the office.
And just general education. Reading TCOYF right now and I have a list of other books I want to read to learn as much as possible before attempting and hopefully reduce the time it takes TTC assuming we don't run into major obstacles.
So ya, Operation: Flawless Fertility is underway!!!!0 -
I've spent the last two nights reading about different charting methods. Because I have PCOS and want to be sure on my results, I am leaning towards the temperature method AND the CM method. I feel confident that I can handle the temperature method but I am a little nervous about observing my CM. Does anyone have experience? Advice? Tips?
Hi Melissa - Have you read Taking Charge of Your Fertility? There is a great deal of info (and pictures for people like me who need to see what "Sticky" means) on temping and CM and even cervical position. After reading TCOYF I learned that to be successful at charting for pregnancy you need to do both because temping only really helps you figure out you O'd AFTER the fact. Doing both is really the way to go. Good luck!0 -
Stupid question.... What does AFM mean when you guys are updating?
AFM- As for me. Also your goals sound great!0 -
Stupid question.... What does AFM mean when you guys are updating?
AFM- As for me. Also your goals sound great!
Ahhhh... that makes sense. Haha, thanks!
Thanks! It seems like a lot to accomplish. =/0 -
Edit--this turned into a doozy long one, but I"m posting it anyways:
Hi all--sheesh--I go on vacation and when I come back, I need another vacation just to catch up with you all!! Missed you all, but obviously not enough to log on during my vacation. Heehee...
Just got back from a week in the OBX (beach)--it was great. Hubby bought me an early birthday present--a Kindle. I read like 8 novels at the beach. It was great. I read on the beach, in bed, on the sofa....I really like the Kindle. I never would have bought one for myself, but he wanted me to have it, and have it on vacation. (My birthday is still a few weeks away.)And I loved it, except for one part, but I'll get to that later. We thought is was going to rain most of the week, but we ended up not getting any rain, and missing all the flooding we had back home from the excessive rain. Couldn't have planned it better if we tried. Now, as far as eating goes, I definitely could have planned that better--oh, ladies, the food porn I could share with you from the last week. I ate a piece of peanut butter pie that was almost the size of my head. I kid you not. SO, weigh in this week is going to be a total bummer. Total total bummer.
Congratulations Kim!! Another graduate...keep em coming. (Pam--I'm counting the days for ya!) Jalara--missed you too--just so you know-I've had breakdowns very similar to the one you had concerning the hubby-worthiness. The crap we tell ourselves. Sheesh. Just remember, you are not alone.
Just reading real quick through some of the postings, I want to share something. Several people have talked about feeling a certain way and then feeling like they "shouldn't" feel that way. We all do it from time to time, but I've been thinking a lot about this--mostly for myself, but I thought I'd share something from my counseling days with you that have been helpful to me recently.
I want to encourage those of us who find ourselves feeling an emotion (sadness, anger, whatever) and then feeling like we "shouldn't" feel that way, to be a bit gentler with ourselves. ( Well, actually, what I want us to do is when we find ourselves thinking that, turn around to ourselves, and say "That's a load of crap--stop it."--but I digress from the larger point.) It's hard, I know, but here's the deal: emotions are emotions. They are what they are, and they are there for a reason, whether due to nature or nurture or a combo. You can't control what you feel--it just is. We are all programmed differently, so we all don't react the same, but our emotional reaction is what it is--ours. And when we discount our emotional reaction, we discount ourselves.
The word "should" is a projection. It's something that someone else is projecting onto you as something they think should be yours to carry--or in the case of self-talk, it's a voice in your head--the voice of society, a family member, or someone else that you carry with you--and when it conflicts with what you are naturally feeling, it just kicks you when you are down. So, for me, I've realized that especially when dealing with fertility issues, the word "should" just adds additional shame for me on top of the heap I already feel with this whole secondary infertility crud. "Should" does not help. (Maybe it's just me....if so, carry on everyone else--pay no attention to my pscho-emotional ramblings.)
The only part you can control is what you choose to do with the emotion you are feeling--your thoughts and your actions. And, the opposite is true as well--your thoughts and actions impact your emotions--which is the good part. So, what I try to do is to say to myself "I'm feeling _____ right now. What am I going to do with it?" The result may be go for a run, talk to a friend, keep it bottled up until a more appropriate time to deal with it, or eat a gallon of haagen daas and cry my eyes out, but at least I'm honoring the real emotion that I'm feeling, which needs to be validated, not shunned, judged or used as ammunition against myself. And I've learned to tell that to other people too-- "Please don't tell me what I should or shouldn't feel. You are not me. Why don't you do something useful like try to help me figure out how to deal with it, instead of making me feel crappier?" ( I think I was on clomid that day--clean it up or fowl it up in whatever manor works best for your situation. I tend to use a more diplomatic approach usually. The message is the same though. (I'm happy to say I have not ever had to say that to my husband. Although many could use the lesson, me thinks.)
Okay--I kinda got up on a soapbox there. Sorry. Most of the time when I do that, it's me working through my own stuff, triggered by something you all have said. So, anyways, thanks for helping me do that. This whole infertility thing is just a huge crappile, isn't it? I think it's all been spurned on by a meltdown I had on vacation. I had been reading a novel where one of the minor characters had an only son, 8 years old, and in the book he was hit by a car and died. I almost couldn't keep reading the book...my chest just tightened up and I almost went into a panic about not being able to have another child. (the jury is still out on that, but I'm feeling a big pessimistic.) As if having another child would lessen the loss of another...but that's where my brain went. It totally triggered me, and I'll spare you all the details, but it more than caught me by surprise, had a lot of "should/should not" thinking that I had to work through, and involved a husband's shoulder to cry on, some oatmeal cookies and a dip in a pool to work through that one. Whew. I'm just glad it happened at the house (with a pool) and not on the beach!
Okay--well, time for bed. I didn't post at all in the last week, I guess this one makes up for it. Night-night ladies--hope I didn't lay too heavy stuff on ya. I just tend to share a lot when I get going....just cyber--slap me if I you want me to lay off the psychostuff...it just kinda leaks out.0 -
While I was away at children's camp I had a little bleeding and cramping which were just in time for implantation bleeding which of course got my hopes up. Then my period came and I was disappointed but figured i had misunderstood my body, then my period has continued and now I'm thinking I did not misunderstand the symptoms I was pregnant and lost it I feel like I shouldn't be upset because there is no way to confirm that is what happened but guess what, I AM upset.
i can relate to the feelings you have. i am so sorry you are feeling this way. hugs emily. 0 -
But! We were able to BD on EVERY potential fertile day and the only real side effect I had from the clomid was for 2 days I felt like my ovaries were the size of grapefruits. I go in for CD21 bloodwork on Monday and can start peeing on sticks on the 20th....fingers crossed!!
fingers crossed alisa.0 -
This has proven to be the 2nd month with no positive OPK's and I've yet to have a temperature shift at all. I am beginning to believe that I'm not ovulating at all. How long did the ladies out there with ovulation issues wait to go see a DR. about it? I'm just feeling quite bummed about it all but trying to keep my chin up.
i would see a doctor right away. there are a lot of things medically that could be keeping you from ovulating (like pcos) and it might be a really simple fix (like taking clomid).0 -
So ya, Operation: Flawless Fertility is underway!!!!
fingers crossed for you. it sounds like you have a good plan. by the way, have i mentioned how much i love lists? 
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Okay--I kinda got up on a soapbox there. Sorry. Most of the time when I do that, it's me working through my own stuff, triggered by something you all have said. So, anyways, thanks for helping me do that. This whole infertility thing is just a huge crappile, isn't it? I think it's all been spurned on by a meltdown I had on vacation. I had been reading a novel where one of the minor characters had an only son, 8 years old, and in the book he was hit by a car and died. I almost couldn't keep reading the book...my chest just tightened up and I almost went into a panic about not being able to have another child. (the jury is still out on that, but I'm feeling a big pessimistic.) As if having another child would lessen the loss of another...but that's where my brain went. It totally triggered me, and I'll spare you all the details, but it more than caught me by surprise, had a lot of "should/should not" thinking that I had to work through, and involved a husband's shoulder to cry on, some oatmeal cookies and a dip in a pool to work through that one. Whew. I'm just glad it happened at the house (with a pool) and not on the beach!
welcome back from the beach karen! heavy stuff to be feeling on vacation. i'm glad you got in a good cry in private though; it usually helps clear my head.0
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