Creepy guy in the weight room advice

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  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    One thing you could do is take a picture of him..let him see you do it. That way you don't have to interact but he will see you seeing him for sure and will know that his behavior has been noted. And if he's *not* a real creeper, chances are he will approach you after that hint and give up his agenda/malfunction. If he is a creeper, he'll probably vanish.

    If you're hanging around at the gym staring at women, you're either a creeper or a douche. Either way, I have no sympathy. It's one thing to look, make eye contact, then move on. Quite another to just STARE.

    I assume you'd have no problem with him taking a picture of the creepy person who's taking a picture of him, then. It seems completely appropriate. Or would that be too creepy?
    I agree, I would never just randomly walk up to him or anyone else and take a picture, that is really weird to me, and highly inappropriate.
  • pilotgirl2007
    pilotgirl2007 Posts: 368 Member
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    Most clubs have it in their policy that no photography is allowed... just saying : ) so if you can get him to take a pic of you then you can report him and all is solved lol
  • Jeff92se
    Jeff92se Posts: 3,369 Member
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    Just maize him
  • dshalbert
    dshalbert Posts: 677 Member
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    I personally don't see blatantly staring and following you from one area of the gym to another to stand in the doorway and blatantly stare again as the behavior of a shy and socially awkward person. Seems like rather aggressive and intimidating behavior. I don’t think I’d engage this guy with conversation. As one poster said, he may read into this as you being ok okay with this behavior and step it up a notch.
  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
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    One thing you could do is take a picture of him..let him see you do it. That way you don't have to interact but he will see you seeing him for sure and will know that his behavior has been noted. And if he's *not* a real creeper, chances are he will approach you after that hint and give up his agenda/malfunction. If he is a creeper, he'll probably vanish.

    If you're hanging around at the gym staring at women, you're either a creeper or a douche. Either way, I have no sympathy. It's one thing to look, make eye contact, then move on. Quite another to just STARE.

    I assume you'd have no problem with him taking a picture of the creepy person who's taking a picture of him, then. It seems completely appropriate. Or would that be too creepy?

    I have done this several times in my apt complex...I take pictures of anyone who seems to be lurking around, and I photograph their license plates as well. It's not "randomly" walking up to someone...it's a reaction to someone who is already treading a thin line regarding personal privacy.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    Just maize him

    I don't have maize . . . but I do have sweet potatoes, herbs, banana peppers, and tomatoes that have been hanging on the vine a little to long . . . I think I'll go with the tomatoes.
  • Beastette
    Beastette Posts: 1,497 Member
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    So, here is yet another perspective. There was a WOMAN at my gym, who obviously just wasn't RIGHT. She would come to group fitness classes, then do her own workout in there. I don't mean modification, I mean her OWN workout. But I never paid attention, other than to think she was weird. Until I was the only person in the locker room, in the shower, and heard her fighting...with no one. She was threatening to kill someone, yelling...not on a bluetooth either. I used to work with people with psychiatric disorders, so I got dressed, and got out of there soaking wet. Turns out, she was schizophrenic, and they let her hang around to be nice. I wouldn't have known if I hadn't reported it. They notified her family she was off her meds, never saw her again. You tell the supervisor EXACTLY what happened, as well as the intangibles that made you feel off-kilter. You give a full description of his appearance and clothing. That's your right. Don't approach him, it may just encourage him.
  • ShapeUpSidney
    ShapeUpSidney Posts: 1,092 Member
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    I have done this several times in my apt complex...I take pictures of anyone who seems to be lurking around, and I photograph their license plates as well. It's not "randomly" walking up to someone...it's a reaction to someone who is already treading a thin line regarding personal privacy.

    You sound like a real peach. I hear they have some openings at the DHS...
  • Beastette
    Beastette Posts: 1,497 Member
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    Oh...and do it in WRITING. For several reasons. So many stories begin, "we all thought he was little weird, but we never thought...". As for my report, I walked out of the locker room fully dressed and soaked and said: "There is a lady in there with this description. She is threatening the air to buck somebody up. I KNOW she doesn't mean me, but I am the only person in there. If she comes anywhere close to me with that, she is gonna find what she AIN'T looking for. Better handle it."
  • Jeff92se
    Jeff92se Posts: 3,369 Member
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    Actually the last time I was in a gym, there was this older lady" working out". She 1/2 *kitten* the weights around just to be around some of the younger guys (my guess anyway). Apparently I was the best thing going that morning (free weight room was almost empty haha!). Suddenly she just so happens to be doing "her workout" right next to me. I was going "wtf"? I just ignored her.

    Next time I see her, I'm lighting her up with the maize.
  • MikeSEA
    MikeSEA Posts: 1,074 Member
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    One thing you could do is take a picture of him..let him see you do it. That way you don't have to interact but he will see you seeing him for sure and will know that his behavior has been noted. And if he's *not* a real creeper, chances are he will approach you after that hint and give up his agenda/malfunction. If he is a creeper, he'll probably vanish.

    If you're hanging around at the gym staring at women, you're either a creeper or a douche. Either way, I have no sympathy. It's one thing to look, make eye contact, then move on. Quite another to just STARE.

    I assume you'd have no problem with him taking a picture of the creepy person who's taking a picture of him, then. It seems completely appropriate. Or would that be too creepy?

    I have done this several times in my apt complex...I take pictures of anyone who seems to be lurking around, and I photograph their license plates as well. It's not "randomly" walking up to someone...it's a reaction to someone who is already treading a thin line regarding personal privacy.

    So your solution to what is essentially a highly debatable act of privacy invasion is to document the fact that you're invading their privacy by your own actions. I'm sure that's not how you see it. By all means, pay attention to your instincts, report it to someone if you feel the need, but don't go around documenting license plates because your hackles got raised. You're not nearly so omniscient as you seem to believe you are.
  • ShapeUpSidney
    ShapeUpSidney Posts: 1,092 Member
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    So your solution to what is essentially a highly debatable act of privacy invasion is to document the fact that you're invading their privacy by your own actions. I'm sure that's not how you see it. By all means, pay attention to your instincts, report it to someone if you feel the need, but don't go around documenting license plates because your hackles got raised. You're not nearly so omniscient as you seem to believe you are.

    +1
  • Avalonis
    Avalonis Posts: 1,540 Member
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    Well, I have officially deduced from this thread that there are some serious whackos on MFP.

    I bet you people think theres a government conspiracy that killed MLK too, right?

    And Area 51?
  • Avalonis
    Avalonis Posts: 1,540 Member
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    So your solution to what is essentially a highly debatable act of privacy invasion is to document the fact that you're invading their privacy by your own actions. I'm sure that's not how you see it. By all means, pay attention to your instincts, report it to someone if you feel the need, but don't go around documenting license plates because your hackles got raised. You're not nearly so omniscient as you seem to believe you are.

    +1

    +2 defense. Oops, I mean +2
  • irridia
    irridia Posts: 527 Member
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    I agree with Hosed. Find out if anybody else has had any issues, if he's a long time member whose shedule may have changed etc. I also like the "don't stare at my class" Every female teacher I've ever had pretty much views her class as her responsiblity. Most men know not to F w/a Momma!

    Now for a more serious note: EVERY SINGLE TIME I hve ignored my gut, I have regretted it! Every time! I can honestly say that paying attention to the "creepy vibe" hasn't been accurate everytime but IGNORING it HAS!

    If you have a way to discreetly let your class know that they should go to the parking lot on a buddy system then do it and follow that advice as well until someone can vet the guy as okay. Screw speculation! TRUST YOUR GUT! When you trust it the worst case scenario is you look foolish... who cares! ?

    hope it's just a conicidence.
  • ZachyABaby
    ZachyABaby Posts: 235
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    I was physically attacked by some body builders at a gym because I "Looked Creepy"

    I don't go to gyms now, and I wont either

    How did you all miss this ****ing hilarity? This guy wins.
  • BellySoonGone
    BellySoonGone Posts: 150
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    Actually the last time I was in a gym, there was this older lady" working out". She 1/2 *kitten* the weights around just to be around some of the younger guys (my guess anyway). Apparently I was the best thing going that morning (free weight room was almost empty haha!). Suddenly she just so happens to be doing "her workout" right next to me. I was going "wtf"? I just ignored her.

    Next time I see her, I'm lighting her up with the maize.

    Awesome dude! That's the spirit & post it on YouTube. Let it be a lesson.
  • hrobinson416
    hrobinson416 Posts: 207 Member
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    Also the guys in here that think we're being overly-paranoid...fortunately for you, you will never have to live life with the fear that somebody will attack you simply because you're viewed as an inferior and weak person due to your gender. You don't have to carry rape whistles, mace, pepper spray, tasers and other precautions when going for a jog. You don't have to worry like a woman does. Is this guy more than likely harmless, of course, but as women who deal with living life like this, we have to be overly cautious. Women are always blamed for everything. "She wanted it", "she was dressed scantily" etc. We're always blamed and told it's out fault we're attacked and raped. So yeah, we are paranoid, because god forbid this guy is a sicko and thinks that in her workout clothes, she's trying to seduce him or whatever. We have to be overly cautious because society teaches us that if we aren't, bad things will happen to us and they will be our fault. Be lucky, you can live a much more worry free life.


    ^^ This.
  • hrobinson416
    hrobinson416 Posts: 207 Member
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    That was sarcasm.

    I can't tell if you think he's gong to attack you while at the gym? I think that's being paranoid.

    If you think he's trying to size you up for something later, then okay. But if that's the case, then he's already revealed his hand. You already know who he is and I'm pretty positive you aren't going to let that guy within 30 yards of you while you're alone.

    If he's actually checking you out THAT much, talk to the guy. Say "hey, what's up with the googily eyes man?"



    Okay - you men are unreal on here.

    My cousin teaches Zumba...She had a similar situation..a guy just "checked" out the class from outside....when she got in her truck to go home..he followed her HOME!! This crap happens ALL the time to women. I am sure the OP gets checked out all the time at the gym....its when the creepy vibe comes on that she needs to listen to it - be prepared - never be alone.

    Also, if you want to act like a creepy stalker dude - you deserve to be treated like one...grow a backbone if you want to talk to someone - otherwise quit acting like a creep. Its that simple. Being a little shy - checking her out - thats one thing....standing at the door like Mr. Zombie to stare at them = too weird.

    Its because of these types of reactions to a womans gut feelings that make her second guess herself and wind up raped or murdered.

    OP - dont be alone when leaving the gym. If he does it again either approach him directly in the gym and tell him hes weirding you out or have someone else approach him that can tell him the same. If he doesnt stop after that - I would see about having his membership removed or something. Protect yourself. Who cares what these guys think about being paranoid. Its your life and your safety.
  • corieueber
    corieueber Posts: 72 Member
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    Aren't you a bit too paranoid? I mean he could simply be checking you out or perhaps want to ask for advice but to shy too ask?

    Funny how the posts about being over dramatic are from blokes - they don't get it sometimes (not being mean), my hubby doesn't understand that l feel uncomfortable walking/jogging after dark

    Go with your gut instincts, l really believe that we have a six sense for feeling something's odd and please follow the feeling, rather be made to feel a fool for over cautious than it going the other way and something happening for the worst.

    Someone can check you out without you feeling creeped out, let the staff know so they can keep an eye out for odd behavior

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