Wow I really dont want to hear that

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  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
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    I think everyone should stop worrying so damn much about what other people have going on in their heads. Guess what? People care way more about how they feel about themselves than how their words will make you feel... and really, nobody can make you feel anything without your consent. So, stop letting people get in your head about your size, because your body image issues are not their job to manage.
  • therealangd
    therealangd Posts: 1,861 Member
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    Poor self esteem and body issues are a horrible thing.
  • seehawkmomma
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    Fat is a relative term. I can remember when I hit 130 and thought OMG, I am a whale. I had never weighed that much before except when I was pregnant so it seemed fat to me at the time.

    ^^^ This

    I am 5' and was 130lbs at my highest two months ago, that is what I weighed when I was pregnant! To me I was fat because that is not what I have looked like most of my life.

    Yes you are venting (totally understandable) but you have also now done exactly what you are venting about, you have now insulted those who are smaller and possibly made them uncomfortable.

    These types of threads tend get way out of hand, It's just not good stuff to post:smile:


    If I offended anyone let me say sorry now.

    But clearly from reading what others have posted I am not the only one who feels this way.

    Again I wasnt attacking self Images here I am talking about the statement in general and how I find it rude.
  • writtenINthestars
    writtenINthestars Posts: 1,933 Member
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    I get that people see their flaws. I do too. I see my flaws all the time and judge myself for them.

    But if I was to weigh 120lbs and was sitting next to a girl who was clearly over weight I would think to have the restraint to refrain from calling myself FAT in random converstation.

    If this was a friend I would of course be supportive. But I also find it rude.

    You are assuming they are somehow complaining to take a stab at you? I wonder if the same girl goes home and chokes up every meal....you really need to not let something like that annoy you. It's not fair and the other person doesn't have to restrain any thoughts or comments to make sure you don't get offended.
  • str0nger
    str0nger Posts: 36 Member
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    Sorry but 5'2 and 130 (TO ME) is not fat.

    By any means. And if you are usually 115 that would put a LITTLE over weight.

    I wouldnt go to the extreme to say FAT.

    Again thats just me.

    And I know women have issues with their bodies. But again i was trying to say that the statement in general.

    I am not attacking women and their self image.

    I hate woman and their "self-images" of themselves, when they tend to say "Oh im FAT" or "I'm the HOTTEST thing thats EVER walked on this planet". I believe that everyone, including men, are beautiful even if their size 32 or size 0. So what we may have flaws or we may have the best body out there, but thats what makes us unique.

    What pisses me off the MOST is that there are woman saying "Oh im fat" "Im not beautiful enough" "Im too skinny" and just sit on their *kitten* and Don't do anything about it to change anything, weather that be toning up, losing weight, gaining weight, plastic sugery, or FINDING PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY APPICIATE WHO THEY ARE NOT FOR THEIR BODY, or WHATEVER.

    I realize people have self image problems, and struggle with it for years. However once you get over it and realize youre beautiful no matter what, and start to love yourself for your flaws then you can learn self acceptance.

    TL:DR - Love yourself NO MATTER what. And if you don't... then change something. Othewise quit *****ing.
  • galegetsthin
    galegetsthin Posts: 1,352 Member
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    I am very concious to not ever say that I am fat around anyone else. Because I dont know how they are feeling. And if a thin girl thinks that she has issues, me saying that I am fat is going to make her a little more concious of her own issues, and it will start a conversation about weight. It is a conversation that I try to avoid everywhere but here. I know that everyone has "fat days". My only issue was that I was 230 lbs heavier than her and was upset that she would say that about herself in front of me. Because if she thinks she is fat, how huge must I look to her. It was a courtesy thing for me. Be mindful of the company you are with and avoid certain comments to spare hurt feelings.
  • seehawkmomma
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    I get that people see their flaws. I do too. I see my flaws all the time and judge myself for them.

    But if I was to weigh 120lbs and was sitting next to a girl who was clearly over weight I would think to have the restraint to refrain from calling myself FAT in random converstation.

    If this was a friend I would of course be supportive. But I also find it rude.

    You are assuming they are somehow complaining to take a stab at you? I wonder if the same girl goes home and chokes up every meal....you really need to not let something like that annoy you. It's not fair and the other person doesn't have to restrain any thoughts or comments to make sure you don't get offended.


    I am not assuming that at all.

    I am saying its frustrating. And I dont think they are stabbing at me. But CLEARLY I weigh 224lbs and they weigh more than my left foot. So why cant they save those comments until they are around someone who is their friend?? Or someone who maybe can understand where they are coming from??
  • shanolap
    shanolap Posts: 1,204 Member
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    My response to ANYONE who makes negative comments regarding their weight, body or heck, mental state is "So, whatcha gonna do about it?". It's not my job to own their comments.
  • CiciPorcayo
    CiciPorcayo Posts: 381 Member
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    I am 148lbs and I think I am over weight because for my height at 5'2 I am... and I call myself fat and chubby all the time but that is because most of my weight is in my stomach and thighs so nothing fits right... You have every right to kind of be annoyed if you are bigger but you have to understand everyone is different and some people weren't born or grew up heavy and became heavy and mentally it is hard for them... I know this personally because I use to be 105 and gained a ton of weight with my kids... for me anyways and Now it is unsettling and really bothers me how overweight I feel personally....
  • seehawkmomma
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    I am very concious to not ever say that I am fat around anyone else. Because I dont know how they are feeling. And if a thin girl thinks that she has issues, me saying that I am fat is going to make her a little more concious of her own issues, and it will start a conversation about weight. It is a conversation that I try to avoid everywhere but here. I know that everyone has "fat days". My only issue was that I was 230 lbs heavier than her and was upset that she would say that about herself in front of me. Because if she thinks she is fat, how huge must I look to her. It was a courtesy thing for me. Be mindful of the company you are with and avoid certain comments to spare hurt feelings.

    Exactly.

    I never say I am fat around anyone but my besties who know me for me and I can be myself around. I would never bring up weight around anyone else.
  • Marig0ld
    Marig0ld Posts: 671 Member
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    I read in one of Geneen Roth's books (I forget which one), that women bond over trashing their bodies. I honestly think it's true. It just makes me roll my eyes when someone smaller than me complains about being "fat." Just be happy you have a healthy, fully functioning body. Easier said than done, I know. :flowerforyou:
  • Troll
    Troll Posts: 922 Member
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    ha, i have a friend that does that. Shes about 5'6" and has legs a mile long and a tiny waist. Whatever she wears looks amazing on her, and shes forever talking about a muffin top. I finally told her,"if thats a muffin top, i have a whole bakery. Shut up, hoe." now we laugh because we learned that we envied the other ones shape. BUT i need to say; im 4'8" so 130lbs would be fat on me :D everyone has fat days, and nobody likes hearing about someone elses,lmao!
  • writtenINthestars
    writtenINthestars Posts: 1,933 Member
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    I get that people see their flaws. I do too. I see my flaws all the time and judge myself for them.

    But if I was to weigh 120lbs and was sitting next to a girl who was clearly over weight I would think to have the restraint to refrain from calling myself FAT in random converstation.

    If this was a friend I would of course be supportive. But I also find it rude.

    You are assuming they are somehow complaining to take a stab at you? I wonder if the same girl goes home and chokes up every meal....you really need to not let something like that annoy you. It's not fair and the other person doesn't have to restrain any thoughts or comments to make sure you don't get offended.


    I am not assuming that at all.

    I am saying its frustrating. And I dont think they are stabbing at me. But CLEARLY I weigh 224lbs and they weigh more than my left foot. So why cant they save those comments until they are around someone who is their friend?? Or someone who maybe can understand where they are coming from??

    I understand what you are saying but my point is that if someone says things like that regardless of their surrounding audience, maybe they're suffering from body dysmorphic disorder..which means they don't even notice what your weight is...they can only focus on their own.
  • belgerian
    belgerian Posts: 1,059 Member
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    I can relate to that statement I still consider myself overweight not obese but about 20lbs over what I want to weigh and my Healthy BMI weight. Most ppl tell me I am too skinny but they are just comparing me to what used to look like.
  • killagb
    killagb Posts: 3,280 Member
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    I get that people see their flaws. I do too. I see my flaws all the time and judge myself for them.

    But if I was to weigh 120lbs and was sitting next to a girl who was clearly over weight I would think to have the restraint to refrain from calling myself FAT in random converstation.

    If this was a friend I would of course be supportive. But I also find it rude.

    You are assuming they are somehow complaining to take a stab at you? I wonder if the same girl goes home and chokes up every meal....you really need to not let something like that annoy you. It's not fair and the other person doesn't have to restrain any thoughts or comments to make sure you don't get offended.


    I am not assuming that at all.

    I am saying its frustrating. And I dont think they are stabbing at me. But CLEARLY I weigh 224lbs and they weigh more than my left foot. So why cant they save those comments until they are around someone who is their friend?? Or someone who maybe can understand where they are coming from??
    Most people probably weigh more than your left foot. Just sayin.
  • Bronx_Montgomery
    Bronx_Montgomery Posts: 2,287 Member
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    I hear you on that. I have seen some girls on here who are less then that and have a good thin tone body saying that they feel fat. Im thinking where do they see the fat. I think a lot of it has to do with self esteem issues. I have met amazing woman with curves /fit who are very confident and work with what they have.
  • MaraDiaz
    MaraDiaz Posts: 4,604 Member
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    zuzana-light-body-rock-tv_163038843.jpg

    Confidence no matter how you look always works better than lack of confidence no matter how you look. That said, I'd have a lot more confidence if I saw this in the mirror every day! She looks fantastic.
  • gp79
    gp79 Posts: 1,799 Member
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    Skinny fat.
  • honeysprinkles
    honeysprinkles Posts: 1,757 Member
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    I used to think I was fat when I was younger. 5'6" 125-130 lbs and I thought I was fat. I didn't go around telling people though, because it was something that I was actually insecure about at the time.

    Looking back now, I think I was crazy! but you never know how those people really feel.
  • honeysprinkles
    honeysprinkles Posts: 1,757 Member
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    She just looked at me for a minute. Later, I more calmly explained that since she did have to go up a size, I understand how that relates in her mind as "fat", but to try and be a little more cognizant of the fact that there is a person beside you that makes up almost 3 of you. And I asked her to not invite me clothes shopping with her since it tended to upset me so much. Even if my sensitivity was my own issue, it was an issue and we should avoid that scenario. She understood and never did it again and made sure to complement me on my losses along the way.
    Right before I started back up on here, I went to the mall with a friend. I had no money so I used that as my excuse, but I didn't try anything on, didn't look at anything...it sucked going shopping with someone who could wear anything that they wanted to without having to worry about it being unflattering. It was MY issue and not hers, like you said, so I didn't say anything about it but the trip left me feeling pretty bad about myself too, so I totally get that feeling.