breastfeeding in public

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Replies

  • cobracars
    cobracars Posts: 949 Member

    I think the ones who choose to breastfeed publicly are crying for attention, and they are sure to get it.


    Poor choice of words on my part!
    I intended to say the ones WHO ARE PROTESTING AND CALLING THE MEDIA are crying for attention. "breastfeeding publicly" was meant as those who are deliberatly drawing attention to themselves.


  • it is definitely one of those topics!

    the reason i posted this is because i'm against it in public. i understand it's natural and it's the best for your baby. i am a nursing student so i've been taught that over and over. i don't think it should be done in public however. it's not because it's sexual at all, it's just because it should be a private thing between you and your baby. i don't care to see you take your breast out in public and have your baby latch onto it. if i'm in your hospital room or your house, i have no problem with it. but i dislike seeing it in public. i also know i will not breastfeed my future children so that might also have something to do with it as well.

    You sound like a prude and sexually repressed. I couldn't care less when and where a mother breastfeeds her baby. If I happen to catch sight of a woman breastfeeding her child, the only thing going through my mind is what a lucky and healthy child and responsible mom.

    As far as it being a private thing - Why is that so? We all eat in public and babies should be able to do the same. What difference does it make whether it is from the nipple of a bottle or a breast. Only human beings have such stupid attitudes towards the human body and how exposure of such should be shameful.

    So to all you breastfeeding woman - Go for it. Anytime, anyplace, whenever it is necessary. No need to go to a grungy, smelly bathroom on my account.
  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member
    Shouldn't this be in the debate group?

    I nursed both of my babies. My daughter was perfectly happy nursing under a cover until she was about 8 months old, and then she would repeatedly kick it off, so that caused more of a commotion than just not covering. I tended to wear a nursing tank under a regular shirt so I wasn't hanging out all over the place. My son wouldn't nurse under a cover at all, even as an infant. He would just cry and cry until I took it off. So I was back to the tank and shirt. And because it comes up often in these discussions, neither of my kids would take my pumped milk from a bottle. I have an excess of the enzyme lipase in my milk, so after it's been out of my body for more than a few minutes my milk would taste like soap. I don't blame them for not wanting it.

    Most nursing moms aren't actually trying to get attention. They're trying to feed their babies. I've been around a lot of nursing moms, and I have never seen any of them just show all their stuff all over the place, except maybe accidentally when the baby bit and modesty was less important than breaking the latch.
  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member

    I think the ones who choose to breastfeed publicly are crying for attention, and they are sure to get it.


    Poor choice of words on my part!
    I intended to say the ones WHO ARE PROTESTING AND CALLING THE MEDIA are crying for attention. "breastfeeding publicly" was meant as those who are deliberatly drawing attention to themselves.

    They're actually drawing attention to the fact that these businesses have repeatedly asked nursing moms to go to the bathroom to nurse, which they are legally not allowed to do. They're not getting attention for themselves personally, they're just calling attention to the law. No state classifies breastfeeding in public as a lewd or unlawful act.
  • StrengthIDidntKnow
    StrengthIDidntKnow Posts: 543 Member
    Personally, I couldn't do it, but that had more to do with me not being able to figure out how to get my boob out discreetly. But I was also lucky and was always able to find some place to go, I would have done it if I had to.

    For other people it depends on the age of the child. The only time some one nursing in public made me uncomfortable, it was because the child was 5.
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    Making some low fat air-popped popcorn. I'll sit back and watch the anvils fly past.

    it is definitely one of those topics!

    the reason i posted this is because i'm against it in public. i understand it's natural and it's the best for your baby. i am a nursing student so i've been taught that over and over. i don't think it should be done in public however. it's not because it's sexual at all, it's just because it should be a private thing between you and your baby. i don't care to see you take your breast out in public and have your baby latch onto it. if i'm in your hospital room or your house, i have no problem with it. but i dislike seeing it in public. i also know i will not breastfeed my future children so that might also have something to do with it as well.

    Where would you prefer people go in private? There aren't always private options. As a nurse in triaining I would urge you to reconsider your plans for breast feeding in the future. You should be well trained in the benefits of breastfeeding and the drawbacks of using formula.
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    Making some low fat air-popped popcorn. I'll sit back and watch the anvils fly past.

    it is definitely one of those topics!

    the reason i posted this is because i'm against it in public. i understand it's natural and it's the best for your baby. i am a nursing student so i've been taught that over and over. i don't think it should be done in public however. it's not because it's sexual at all, it's just because it should be a private thing between you and your baby. i don't care to see you take your breast out in public and have your baby latch onto it. if i'm in your hospital room or your house, i have no problem with it. but i dislike seeing it in public. i also know i will not breastfeed my future children so that might also have something to do with it as well.

    Where would you prefer people go in private? There aren't always private options. As a nurse in triaining I would urge you to reconsider your plans for breast feeding in the future. You should be well trained in the benefits of breastfeeding and the drawbacks of using formula.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member


    it is definitely one of those topics!

    the reason i posted this is because i'm against it in public. i understand it's natural and it's the best for your baby. i am a nursing student so i've been taught that over and over. i don't think it should be done in public however. it's not because it's sexual at all, it's just because it should be a private thing between you and your baby. i don't care to see you take your breast out in public and have your baby latch onto it. if i'm in your hospital room or your house, i have no problem with it. but i dislike seeing it in public. i also know i will not breastfeed my future children so that might also have something to do with it as well.

    Then you shouldn't bottle feed in public, either, using that logic.
  • KimmieBrie
    KimmieBrie Posts: 825 Member
    I have no issue with breastfeeding. When a baby - OR person for that matter is hungry - they eat.
    The difference is - you don't see people walking around a store shopping while stuffing their face with food and drink,
    in fact, in most stores that is not even allowed. When we are hungry we go to the appropriate place to eat - which is NOT a bathroom by the way. but it's also not the shoe aisle. If feeding your child you don't have to walk around shopping to do it. Sitting off to the side is fine. Walking up and down the aisles of a clothing store for example is not the appropriate place for eating/feeding - not just for breastfeeding mothers - but for anyone. I don't even notice mothers off to side breastfeeding.
  • AmyLRed
    AmyLRed Posts: 856 Member
    ok, so i admit that i only read through half the posts. The drama (aka back and forth arguing) is too much for me to read them all.

    I breast fed my son, discretely, as most breastfeeding mothers do.

    The poster who said that those who do it in public are looking for attention had a teensy tiny point. I do not agree with his statement in general, but i do think there are a FEW women who are very hotly invested in the topic and their rights (i get that, and am fine with being invested in it, but...) and they flaunt it. Again, this is only a tiny percentage of women, very very very few, but they are out there. Those women who might purposely expose half a torso and a nearly whole breast to feed their child in public with, of course, the intention to feed their child but an underlying motive to stir debate are what gives breast feeding in public such a negative connotation for many.

    Again, not trying to anger anyone with my post, just pointing out that yes, 99% (or more) of BF moms are discreet and whatnot, there are some who are not.

    I am a photographer and have even done nursing sessions with moms and babies. It is beautiful and natural. However, just yesterday i saw a photo posted by the friend of a friend on Facebook of a woman who was very large breasted (as am i, not judging that) breast feeding what looked to be a 3-4 year old and a 6 month old infant. She was showing it all, so to speak, and posting it with quotes about it being natural, etc...... To me, this isnt a beautiful photo of a nursing mother feeding her children, it was a photo posted to stir debate and freak out those who are against it. I was not personally offended by her photo, but to me, she may have been seeking attention. (vs someone who has some nursing photos in an album with other photos and doesnt make a big deal of it, because it is natural, healthy, etc)
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    I could care less one way or the other. I am, however, getting tired of these mass demonstrations every time someone feels their rights or personal space is being violated.

    I hope someone gets kicked out of Starbucks for picking their nose. then maybe we can stage a "Pick-in" and help save the world from fascism.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    I could care less one way or the other. I am, however, getting tired of these mass demonstrations every time someone feels their rights or personal space is being violated.

    I hope someone gets kicked out of Starbucks for picking their nose. then maybe we can stage a "Pick-in" and help save the world from fascism.
  • Scorpiomom222
    Scorpiomom222 Posts: 1,462 Member
    This is my daughter at the nurse-in, and I'm standing in the upper left corner. http://m.bozemandailychronicle.com/mobile/news/article_f210f298-31b2-11e1-b836-0019bb2963f4.html

    001-11.jpg
  • sexforjaffacakes
    sexforjaffacakes Posts: 1,001 Member
    I'm not a "crazy bra burning" feminist, but I hate that boobs are considered so "rude" in the western world anyway, there's nothing wrong with womens breasts, just another stupid sexist thing we've had drummed into us. Guys can get their chebs out whenever they want, it's absurd to think a woman's breasts are inappropriate. They can be viewed in a sexual way but so can most parts of the body. In other cultures breasts are still considered sexual - at the appropriate time, the rest of the time the woman walk about topless and breastfeed their babies and no one looks twice. We're just very uptight about boobs in the "civilized" world
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,716 Member
    Anyone who gets that upset over the possibility of maybe seeing a part of a breast, while it's being used to feed a living human being, just needs to get over themselves. Period. There are bigger problems in this life. It's a boob. We'll all be ok. Riots will not ensue. Grow up. Put that energy to better use.
  • atsteele
    atsteele Posts: 1,358 Member
    What century is this?? Because I could SWEAR the Victorian Age is long gone.
  • Ultima_Morpha
    Ultima_Morpha Posts: 892 Member
    I am a supporter of the right to breastfeed "wherever a woman has a legal right to be", but I don't generally support these nurse-in type actions because I don't believe that they raise positive awareness and support....only create more polarity. Target as a company isn't the problem here, but the actions of their co-workers. Yes, they represent Target and their policies, but you can only do so much to ensure they are interpreted and upheld. I work for a company which is an ardent supporter of breastfeeding, but we still have situations in our retail stores when co-workers either don't know or allow their personal opinions to interfere with the implementation of the company policy.

    In my own personal experiences, it was usually the ACT of breastfeeding itself...not any flashing of the flesh that was the problem. On one particular occasion, when my baby was quite young still, my husband took me out to dinner. Because I was very busty and still getting the hang of everything, both my daughter and I were completely covered with a blanket. Apparantly another customer complained to the waiter because her child was asking questions and she "knew what I was doing". As if it was some sort of perverse act rather than feeding my baby in a completely modest way. The reality is that I could have been just shielding my baby from a draft or the lights!

    Our waiter asked us to leave; I politely declined to do so and asked to speak with the manager. When the manager arrived, I very nicely explained the law to him and that we would not be leaving before we had eaten our dinner. We offered to take a different table so that we would be out of the offended customer's eyeline. He was still quite insistent and even offered to comp our dinner if we would take it to go. That was not going to happen (I hadn't been out of the house in weeks and I wanted my dinner hot and fresh). He was trying to avoid one conflict, but was creating another. Maybe because the other party was larger, he was only seeing dollar signs. Unfortunately, they lost us as customers for life. He was in an untenable position, but then he threatened to call the cops. I was then forced to pull out a copy of the law and offered to call the police for him. By this time, our dinner had arrived, my daughter was done eating and the manager just walked away. The irony of it all? A grandparent-age couple the next booth over heard the whole thing and bought our dinner for us!

    Most women I know that breastfeed are experts at discretion--I've never met one that intentionally bared her breast. All babies are different and they don't adhere to a schedule. I ended up being a single, working mother and I had to get errands done when I could get them done. Sometimes that meant I had to nurse my child in my car, the grocery store, airplanes, in my open plan office, the park, and on and on and on. I would use a bathroom if that was the most comfortable place, but it wasn't ever my first choice.

    While I don't believe that bottles and formula are the root of all evil, it is really hard to dispute the many benefits of breastfeeding to mother and baby. I wish that we could get past this as an issue. There are so many other actual problems we could focus on. Nursing moms? Respect that those around you aren't on the same comfort level. Everyone else? Respect nursing mothers and look the other way!
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    I'm not a "crazy bra burning" feminist, but I hate that boobs are considered so "rude" in the western world anyway, there's nothing wrong with womens breasts, just another stupid sexist thing we've had drummed into us. Guys can get their chebs out whenever they want, it's absurd to think a woman's breasts are inappropriate. They can be viewed in a sexual way but so can most parts of the body. In other cultures breasts are still considered sexual - at the appropriate time, the rest of the time the woman walk about topless and breastfeed their babies and no one looks twice. We're just very uptight about boobs in the "civilized" world
    In New York State, it has been legal for years for women to go topless anywhere it is legal for men to go topless. But in all the years I lived there, I never saw a woman do it.
  • rossi02
    rossi02 Posts: 549 Member
    I breastfed both of my boys in public.. I wasn't looking for attention, or showing off. I did it when my kids were hungry. I never used a cover but was always descret about it. In fact, I had a lot of people walk up on me not realizing what I was doing. To get a glimpse at my breast, you would have had to try really, really hard. Why how anyone decides to feed their child is such a big debate, I'll never understand.
  • MaximalLife
    MaximalLife Posts: 2,447 Member
    Just saw a news article about how some women staged a breastfeeding protest in Target stores across the country. What are your thoughts about this? Is it okay or should the woman find a private place to breastfeed in?
    It's a natural and beautiful thing so long as the mom is not just hanging all out in the open.

    It's OK, but have some class.
  • DyannAlvarez
    DyannAlvarez Posts: 162 Member
    "its perfectly natural"
    "its beautiful"
    "its best for the baby"
    blah blah blah

    I think the ones who choose to breastfeed publicly are crying for attention, and they are sure to get it.
    Like most men, I enjoy the opportunity to see a breast every now and then, but this just doesn't seem like the right way to do it.
    I'd prefer they take advantage of a private spot.

    Just 'cause its natural doesn't mean you have to share it with the world.
    Other natural things I prefer not to experience others doing in public:
    urinating
    passing gas
    defacating
    spitting
    vomiting
    coitus
    sodomy
    clipping toe nails or finger nails
    clearing a nasal obstruction with a finger
    flossing or using a toothpick
    etc

    Yeah... either that or their infant needs food. Really? You "enjoy the opportunity to see a breast every now and then"? You really stuck your finger in your nose with that pig remark. Believe it or not! IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU!!
  • 12skipafew99100
    12skipafew99100 Posts: 1,669 Member
    I have breastfed all my babies but always tried to be discrete about it. I have done it at the mall, resturant, in my car and in a bathroom (gross) But I never just let it hang out there for everyone to see. I used a light blanket to keep covered. If the baby was hungry I fed it. It's no big deal. But I sure wouldn't want my husband looking a a naked breast just hanging out there to see, like in your face attitude like. So I see both points. It can be done in a lady like way. We should be able to feed our babies whenever and where ever we are.
    Its just like any other kind of society member. You have those with class and those without.
    Just my humle opinion.
    Deb
  • lynn1982
    lynn1982 Posts: 1,439 Member
    I have no issue with breastfeeding. When a baby - OR person for that matter is hungry - they eat.
    The difference is - you don't see people walking around a store shopping while stuffing their face with food and drink,
    in fact, in most stores that is not even allowed. When we are hungry we go to the appropriate place to eat - which is NOT a bathroom by the way. but it's also not the shoe aisle. If feeding your child you don't have to walk around shopping to do it. Sitting off to the side is fine. Walking up and down the aisles of a clothing store for example is not the appropriate place for eating/feeding - not just for breastfeeding mothers - but for anyone. I don't even notice mothers off to side breastfeeding.


    This is a ridiculous analogy. When a baby is hungry, the baby doesn't say "let's wait until we're in a restaurant." The baby screams, people give the mom dirty looks for having a screaming baby, and the mom now needs to quiet the baby while also getting things done. I'm not advocating whipping one's breasts out in public, but there are discreet ways of doing it, even in the aisle of a clothing store. If the mom feels comfortable with it, then you simply don't have to look.

    I was on an airplane recently where a woman in my aisle was breast feeding. People were complaining to the flight attendant about it. I mean, seriously, what was she supposed to do? Would these people prefer a screaming baby? Probably not...
  • kphillips83
    kphillips83 Posts: 56 Member
    No one freaks out when they see an animal feeding its offspring.. Why freak out when we do?
  • kphillips83
    kphillips83 Posts: 56 Member
    Anyone who gets that upset over the possibility of maybe seeing a part of a breast, while it's being used to feed a living human being, just needs to get over themselves. Period. There are bigger problems in this life. It's a boob. We'll all be ok. Riots will not ensue. Grow up. Put that energy to better use.

    Love it
  • SarabellPlus3
    SarabellPlus3 Posts: 496 Member
    I never get these "nurse-ins." I guess it's just not my style. I BF all of my babies, each for at least 2 years, but I didn't do it to get attention from people, so the whole "nurse-in" thing was never on my list.

    I live in the Midwest, where people are supposedly so conservative, myself. I BF in public a million times. No one has ever looked at me crossways. I think the "secret" is just doing what you need to do, rather than drawing attention to yourself on purpose. I have sat in every mall, and a hundred restaraunts, from here to Chicago, and Minneapolis, and no one every cared that I was BFing. I do know a gal who practically yells it to the restaraunt, and all but takes off her top to do it, non-verbally daring anyone to have a problem with it. Well, guess what? While I've never had an issue, she gets "dirty looks" all the time.

    But I don't really understand the desire to sit on the floor of Target and nurse, either. I don't run to the restroom to do it, but I like to find a bench or something.
  • romping
    romping Posts: 64 Member
    Only in the USA would this be an issue of discussion. Kids gotta eat doesn´t he? I live in South America and noone looks twice at women breastfeeding.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    I have no issue with breastfeeding. When a baby - OR person for that matter is hungry - they eat.
    The difference is - you don't see people walking around a store shopping while stuffing their face with food and drink,
    in fact, in most stores that is not even allowed. When we are hungry we go to the appropriate place to eat - which is NOT a bathroom by the way. but it's also not the shoe aisle. If feeding your child you don't have to walk around shopping to do it. Sitting off to the side is fine. Walking up and down the aisles of a clothing store for example is not the appropriate place for eating/feeding - not just for breastfeeding mothers - but for anyone. I don't even notice mothers off to side breastfeeding.


    This is a ridiculous analogy. When a baby is hungry, the baby doesn't say "let's wait until we're in a restaurant." The baby screams, people give the mom dirty looks for having a screaming baby, and the mom now needs to quiet the baby while also getting things done. I'm not advocating whipping one's breasts out in public, but there are discreet ways of doing it, even in the aisle of a clothing store. If the mom feels comfortable with it, then you simply don't have to look.

    I was on an airplane recently where a woman in my aisle was breast feeding. People were complaining to the flight attendant about it. I mean, seriously, what was she supposed to do? Would these people prefer a screaming baby? Probably not...

    Clearly, the answer is to stop procreating.

    Bottom line is, the law says women can breastfeed in public and that's that.
  • voluptas63
    voluptas63 Posts: 602 Member
    I heard (this is published reports, who knows if it's correct?)... that she was siting in the middle of the floor in the ladies section. I would've asked her to move too. It's not safe for her to be on the floor in the middle of everything. Personally, if I had to feed my child, I'd want a little privacy. I wouldn't want to worry about people walking by or if I accidentally flashed someone etc. What I do is my business and not that of strangers.
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