breastfeeding in public

tsh0ck

maybe we need to consider that size might make a difference here. some sort of ratio, baby's head to breast, divided by the amount of people within a 10-foot radius.

christine24t

I feel like some people see this as a manners issue, some people a rights issue, and then a few people as a sexual issue and can't deal with it (dude who compared it with sodomy).

Definitely agree with this - I see it more as an issue of manners, and modesty.

But if you must breastfeed in public, please think of others when you do so, and be modest about it so people like myself that aren't comfortable with it aren't made to feel awkward, and don't force others into feeling bad for their feelings.

Likewise. When you eat in public, be mindful that there are people around you... and it makes them shudder and nearly vomit at the sight of seeing you chew. Please, don't force them to feel bad because you feel the insane need to eat.

And that is why I have good manners!!

tsh0ck

As ok with doing it in public as I am I also don't feel that exercising my right to do so at the expense of someone elses insecurity is right either!

This in itself reads as judgementa. Perhaps it isn't insecurity. That person may have lost a child or be unable to have one at all. You don't know what another person's situation is.

I don't know why the OP seems defensive about her position. Most of the posters agree that a blanket or modesty cover is preferable for all kinds of reasons. Nobody should be asked to leave for breast feeding unless the place doens't allow children (and there are places that shouldn't). Nobody should be able to whip out a boob in public. You really don't see men in stores doing it either. Maybe it's an issue of context?

I'm defensive because it is how I feel about it. I just don't think it's cool to do it in public, but to each their own. I'm clearly not going to stop anyone from doing it. But if you must breastfeed in public, please think of others when you do so, and be modest about it so people like myself that aren't comfortable with it aren't made to feel awkward, and don't force others into feeling bad for their feelings.

but, in order for you to feel completely comfortable, you want the mother and baby to be uncomfortable, sitting in a nasty public bathroom, hidden away? weird.

dlei456

maybe we need to consider that size might make a difference here. some sort of ratio, baby's head to breast, divided by the amount of people within a 10-foot radius.

I know, right? How much covering is acceptable?

I sometimes think covers draw attention to the breastfeeding, also. Even if it is a cute cover.

annameier8706

You work on the maternity ward with itty bitty teensy weensy babies that don't care if they're covered. Older babies care not for blankets.

I prefer to throw blankets on the heads of people who feel the need to stare....

I totally agree with this. I breastfed both my girls, and I did it a lot in pulic. I used a cover or a blanket to cover what they'd let me cover, but it was mainly to cover up the belly... Lol it never matterd to me if someone saw the fact that I was breast feeding, unless it was an adolescent boy.

frugalmomsrock

I feel like some people see this as a manners issue, some people a rights issue, and then a few people as a sexual issue and can't deal with it (dude who compared it with sodomy).

Definitely agree with this - I see it more as an issue of manners, and modesty.

But if you must breastfeed in public, please think of others when you do so, and be modest about it so people like myself that aren't comfortable with it aren't made to feel awkward, and don't force others into feeling bad for their feelings.

Likewise. When you eat in public, be mindful that there are people around you... and it makes them shudder and nearly vomit at the sight of seeing you chew. Please, don't force them to feel bad because you feel the insane need to eat.

And that is why I have good manners!!

So do 99.9% of nursing mothers... see?

Elizabeth_C34

As a long time nursing mother I personally see nothing wrong with breastfeeding in public...BUT not everyone is as open to me and I personally don't like making people uncomfortable because I think something is okay. I've nursed many times in a dressing room st a store or in the bathroom because other people do not need to feel uncomfortable with what I'm ok doing.

Only if the dressing rooms and bathrooms were completely filled would I do so in an aisle. And I'm VERY comfortable feeding my children in public...done it at parks, under trees on a walk, etc. But there are private places to do it at stores.

As ok with doing it in public as I am I also don't feel that exercising my right to do so at the expense of someone elses insecurity is right either!

I really appreciated reading this and agree completely that just because something is comfortable with one person, does not mean it's comfortable with another. Thank you for posting this!!

So, every nursing mother should cater to everyone else's "discomfort" at expense of feeding her baby because it might maybe someday somewhere somehow offend someone else?

Woah...I never said to do so at the expense of feeding a baby. I'm am extended nursing mother of both of my children and NEVER did I not meet the needs of my hungry child. It literally takes no more than 2 minutes to go to a dressing room or bathroom (about the same amount of time to find a far desserted corner in a store) to do so.

What if a mother has a nusing baby and cart full of groceries at the store? Should she just drop it and go to the bathroom then and leave everything behind? What if she's on a plane or a train or somewhere where access to a private place is limited? I just don't see why people get so incredibly worked up about it and feel the need to go on about how other people should feed their kids because of their own insecurity. That's a problem that should not be an issue for the mother, but the one looking at her scornfully.

christine24t

As ok with doing it in public as I am I also don't feel that exercising my right to do so at the expense of someone elses insecurity is right either!

This in itself reads as judgementa. Perhaps it isn't insecurity. That person may have lost a child or be unable to have one at all. You don't know what another person's situation is.

I don't know why the OP seems defensive about her position. Most of the posters agree that a blanket or modesty cover is preferable for all kinds of reasons. Nobody should be asked to leave for breast feeding unless the place doens't allow children (and there are places that shouldn't). Nobody should be able to whip out a boob in public. You really don't see men in stores doing it either. Maybe it's an issue of context?

I'm defensive because it is how I feel about it. I just don't think it's cool to do it in public, but to each their own. I'm clearly not going to stop anyone from doing it. But if you must breastfeed in public, please think of others when you do so, and be modest about it so people like myself that aren't comfortable with it aren't made to feel awkward, and don't force others into feeling bad for their feelings.

but, in order for you to feel completely comfortable, you want the mother and baby to be uncomfortable, sitting in a nasty public bathroom, hidden away? weird.

I NEVER said a public bathroom, so please don't put words into my mouth. Clearly, a dressing room or a breastfeeding room or some other place would be acceptable.

sarahlovestorun

I'm all for breastfeeding, but I also feel strongly about modesty. Not sure exactly where I stand.

reactor25

I feel like some people see this as a manners issue, some people a rights issue, and then a few people as a sexual issue and can't deal with it (dude who compared it with sodomy). Unfortunately, people display horrible manners all the time (not offering seats, pushing people over, not using thank you or please, talking loudly on cell phones, eating and being really messy, leaving the shopping card full of trash and crap, etc.) Breastfeeding in public just doesn't seem to be in the same category to me. Covering or not covering is up to the mom and her preference.

If there were offensive public habits I would like addressed, it's handwashing. That is certainly something that can physically affect other people. I feel like vomiting when I see someone use the toilet and then not was their hands. But I really can't do anything about it, can I? Just like those who feel discomfort when seeing someone breastfeed can't really do anything either.

But I truly feel breastfeeding is not a public health concern, but damn, wash those hands!

Yes to everything she said!! And seriously, wash those hands!

veganbaum

As ok with doing it in public as I am I also don't feel that exercising my right to do so at the expense of someone elses insecurity is right either!

This in itself reads as judgementa. Perhaps it isn't insecurity. That person may have lost a child or be unable to have one at all. You don't know what another person's situation is.

I don't know why the OP seems defensive about her position. Most of the posters agree that a blanket or modesty cover is preferable for all kinds of reasons. Nobody should be asked to leave for breast feeding unless the place doens't allow children (and there are places that shouldn't). Nobody should be able to whip out a boob in public. You really don't see men in stores doing it either. Maybe it's an issue of context?

I'm defensive because it is how I feel about it. I just don't think it's cool to do it in public, but to each their own. I'm clearly not going to stop anyone from doing it. But if you must breastfeed in public, please think of others when you do so, and be modest about it so people like myself that aren't comfortable with it aren't made to feel awkward, and don't force others into feeling bad for their feelings.

You know what makes me feel awkward? Seeing women displayed like sexual objects in ads and women dressing like they're about to fall out of their clothes. That's not going to change and they certainly aren't thinking about others being uncomfortable. If I were to breastfeed - a completely natural and healthful thing for mother and child - I certainly wouldn't - shouldn't have to be - concerned about other people's feelings about feeding my child. I am personally revolted when people chew with their mouths open and especially when they smack when they do so - seriously ruins my appetite - but they're not going to change their manners. Feeding a child is obviously natural and should not be made into a debate about public decency.

mommamindi

As a mommy who is unable to breastfeed due to medical issues, I have to say I would rather see a baby being nursed in public then being bottle fed, because I know that baby being nursed is not only eating but getting an incredible bond with his/her mother. Breast is best, period, and if you CAN breastfeed but dont WANT to because its "weird" or "uncomfortable" I think you should probably rethink the choice to have kids...

Being a mother means doing everything in your power to give that child the best you can in life, and that includes breastfeeding.

PlunderBunneh

I really hate the term "Whip out a breast." Yeah, cause anyone ever just whips that out. Here, let me swing my breast around, make sure that all the women/men/children in the room get a good long look at my incredibly offensive mammary gland (aka BOOBY) while my child cries in my arms, waiting impatiently for milk. Cause, you know, I'm not doing this because it's been proven to be best for my child, I'm doing it because I really looooove to show off these lovely tatas of mine.
Really?
You think I want to show ANY part of my breast in public? You think I get my kicks this way? No. For most women, breastfeeding in public is INCREDIBLY mortifying, at least here where it's frowned upon in the great ol USA, nation of freedom. I had to build up courage for it every single time, and I would have started sobbing had anyone so much as looked at me with offense in their eyes.
If its legal for you to walk around in a shirt that boldly states "F@ck the world" or whathaveyou, and you can, I assure you, then you can damn well avert your eyes if my feeding my child offends YOU.

loved1

I'm all for women breast feeding. Only in America (the issue was a Target in Texas and also in the Midwest where the "bible belt" is) is it usually an issue. Anywhere else around the world it's not uncommon.

A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer
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Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

ahahaha, we're not prudes here. the employee offered the mom a dressing room and she flipped out and said the employee invaded her privacy.... um... ok. personally, so not to make myself or others feel uncomfortable, i always did it in a bathroom stall if i had a hungry baby and was out and about. (yes, my own babies...)

How did you stand being in a public restroom stall for the 15 minutes that it would take to feed a baby?:laugh: The thought of being in a public restroom a second longer than absolutely necessary makes me gag.

I am very modest & I breastfed - in public when we were in public. All the things I thought I would have worried about weren't close to the top of my priority list when my baby was hungry. I wanted to find a comfortable place to sit to feed the baby. For the most part, a feeding baby covers the breast. I used receiving blankets and a commercial cover. Sometimes they stayed on sometimes they didn't. I agree with a poster above who said that the covers attract a lot more attention that just sitting with the baby at your bosom.

I'm a big coupon shopper so I'm used to asking employees to check their companies corporate policy when they try to tell me that I cannot use a particular coupon. I probably would have suggested check with corporate or their regional office before bothering me again about breastfeeding.

tsh0ck

I really hate the term "Whip out a breast." Yeah, cause anyone ever just whips that out. Here, let me swing my breast around, make sure that all the women/men/children in the room get a good long look at my incredibly offensive mammary gland (aka BOOBY) while my child cries in my arms, waiting impatiently for milk. Cause, you know, I'm not doing this because it's been proven to be best for my child, I'm doing it because I really looooove to show off these lovely tatas of mine.
Really?
You think I want to show ANY part of my breast in public? You think I get my kicks this way? No. For most women, breastfeeding in public is INCREDIBLY mortifying, at least here where it's frowned upon in the great ol USA, nation of freedom. I had to build up courage for it every single time, and I would have started sobbing had anyone so much as looked at me with offense in their eyes.
If its legal for you to walk around in a shirt that boldly states "F@ck the world" or whathaveyou, and you can, I assure you, then you can damn well avert your eyes if my feeding my child offends YOU.

winner!

lock this one down and turn off the lights.

frugalmomsrock

I really hate the term "Whip out a breast." Yeah, cause anyone ever just whips that out. Here, let me swing my breast around, make sure that all the women/men/children in the room get a good long look at my incredibly offensive mammary gland (aka BOOBY) while my child cries in my arms, waiting impatiently for milk. Cause, you know, I'm not doing this because it's been proven to be best for my child, I'm doing it because I really looooove to show off these lovely tatas of mine.
Really?
You think I want to show ANY part of my breast in public? You think I get my kicks this way? No. For most women, breastfeeding in public is INCREDIBLY mortifying, at least here where it's frowned upon in the great ol USA, nation of freedom. I had to build up courage for it every single time, and I would have started sobbing had anyone so much as looked at me with offense in their eyes.
If its legal for you to walk around in a shirt that boldly states "F@ck the world" or whathaveyou, and you can, I assure you, then you can damn well avert your eyes if my feeding my child offends YOU.

Yes. THIS!

dlei456

I really hate the term "Whip out a breast." Yeah, cause anyone ever just whips that out. Here, let me swing my breast around, make sure that all the women/men/children in the room get a good long look at my incredibly offensive mammary gland (aka BOOBY) while my child cries in my arms, waiting impatiently for milk. Cause, you know, I'm not doing this because it's been proven to be best for my child, I'm doing it because I really looooove to show off these lovely tatas of mine.
Really?
You think I want to show ANY part of my breast in public? You think I get my kicks this way? No. For most women, breastfeeding in public is INCREDIBLY mortifying, at least here where it's frowned upon in the great ol USA, nation of freedom. I had to build up courage for it every single time, and I would have started sobbing had anyone so much as looked at me with offense in their eyes.
If its legal for you to walk around in a shirt that boldly states "F@ck the world" or whathaveyou, and you can, I assure you, then you can damn well avert your eyes if my feeding my child offends YOU.

Totally agreed. I really felt like the cover is more for the mom who feels too exposed rather than for everyone else. Nothing announces to the world that someone is breastfeeding than a cover!

Bahet

I really hate the term "Whip out a breast." Yeah, cause anyone ever just whips that out. Here, let me swing my breast around, make sure that all the women/men/children in the room get a good long look at my incredibly offensive mammary gland (aka BOOBY) while my child cries in my arms, waiting impatiently for milk. Cause, you know, I'm not doing this because it's been proven to be best for my child, I'm doing it because I really looooove to show off these lovely tatas of mine.
Really?
You think I want to show ANY part of my breast in public? You think I get my kicks this way? No. For most women, breastfeeding in public is INCREDIBLY mortifying, at least here where it's frowned upon in the great ol USA, nation of freedom. I had to build up courage for it every single time, and I would have started sobbing had anyone so much as looked at me with offense in their eyes.
If its legal for you to walk around in a shirt that boldly states "F@ck the world" or whathaveyou, and you can, I assure you, then you can damn well avert your eyes if my feeding my child offends YOU.

I used bells and strobe lights to make sure everyone knew. It hurt less than swinging it around. :laugh:

Anyone who thinks it's some awful thing to see a woman breastfeeding in public can speak about it and be taken seriously once they've written a letter to Victoria's Secret telling them that their ads are like sodomy, defacating in public, etc. You see FAR more boobage on the average VS ad than you ever will with a nursing mother. Heck, you probably can see far more boobage on the average minor teenage girl in any mall in America than on a nursing mother. Some people just have an issue with those boobs are used for something besides sex.

tlsegar

I agree with the OP. I support any mother's choice to breastfeed or not. But I'm not particularly jazzed about seeing it in public.

I may or may not be a prude. Whatever. I'm fine with my opinion.

sarahlovestorun

Making some low fat air-popped popcorn. I'll sit back and watch the anvils fly past.

it is definitely one of those topics!

the reason i posted this is because i'm against it in public. i understand it's natural and it's the best for your baby. i am a nursing student so i've been taught that over and over. i don't think it should be done in public however. it's not because it's sexual at all, it's just because it should be a private thing between you and your baby. i don't care to see you take your breast out in public and have your baby latch onto it. if i'm in your hospital room or your house, i have no problem with it. but i dislike seeing it in public. i also know i will not breastfeed my future children so that might also have something to do with it as well.

Bottle feeding, then, and for that matter-ALL eating in public should be kept in private, then, right? *rollseyes*

It is so ludicrous that people actually feel this way. A baby is hungry when a baby is hungry. Would people rather hear a baby screaming bloody murder because it isn't "an appropriate time" to feed when mom is out busy running errands? That, my friends, would be neglect...

The private thing for me is that it involves a personal part of a woman's anatomy. No, eating shouldn't be done in private, but when a baby is feeding from a woman's breast, it should be (in my opinion). But at the same time, if a mother is out in public and her baby cries, she should either prepare the baby a bottle or find a place to breastfeed. Both take time. It's not like bottles are just ready to be used either. It all takes time.

You said pretty much exactly how I feel.