Cheating Question for guys ! HELP

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  • MelMoly
    MelMoly Posts: 1,303 Member
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    I wouldn't worry about it... unless it says lets meet up

    but I'm sorry you had to find it... I would talk to him and find out whats going on.. if he doesn't tell you what you want to know... call her, she more than likely wont lie...
  • oberon0124
    oberon0124 Posts: 10,527 Member
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    Edited my post... missed a point at the end of your post.

    If he says she wants to hook up with him, he either needs to make it clear that he is not interested upfront or he needs to get out. Either he intends to have something with her, or is stroking his own ego by stringing her along... either way this is not what your relationship needs.

    Honesty is always the key, and if you are going to enter a lifelong partnership with someone there must be honesty and trust in equal measure from both parties. He either steps up, or steps out!



    thanks ... There is a 6th sense ..the other day he chose to wear a polo shirt that he wears to nice places only. and wore too much cologne..it did tickle my sense. seems just seem to be pointing to that . and other facts that are just wrong. my family is going to be crushed .

    Your family should rally behind you and be thankful that you found this out before you were married!! My oldest daughter had this same thing happen to her when she was planning to be married!!!. We had already spent five thousand on the wedding preperations. My response to her was I was glad we found out now before the wedding when she was concerned about the money already spent. Your family will be there for you my friend!!!


    thank you :cry: really thank you. I know I rather be along than settle with someone who doesn´t think im good enough to be faithful too. in a way i feel like a weigh lifted of my shoulders..for I had doubts about the whole thing and didn´t want to b th one to quit it. i know my mom will be sad bc she knew i truly believed in this guy.

    You my friend are not the one to quit your relationship, he is. He quit it when he decided to carry on with this woman!! Your mom may be sad at first but her anger should be towards him for treqating her daughter this way!
  • TinaS88
    TinaS88 Posts: 817 Member
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    I'm so sorry you had to find a text like that. *big squeezes* I would call the HO-me wrecker and confront her. But I'm an aggressive personality so it's in my nature.


    I would do the same!!
    Then confront him again, let him know he has the chance to be honest with you, and then if he continues to lie, leave his @$$, you don't deserve that!! If he does come clean and you are willing to work it out and find out what was going on, ask him why he is straying elsewhere, what's going on with him.. etc...

    *hugs*
  • becoming_a_new_me
    becoming_a_new_me Posts: 1,860 Member
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    :heart: Telling you this from experience...follow your gut and not your heart. Your heart will tell you lies, but your gut knows the truth. After my experiences, my first instinct is no-way will I be with him. Talk to the HO-me wrecker, but follow what your gut tells you...it won't lie like your heart will. Good luck sweetie! :heart:
  • eatlift
    eatlift Posts: 113
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    I think he likes her. Or maybe he never had much luck with girls in his early life and doesn't know what else to tell the girl. I dont know.
  • xginanax
    xginanax Posts: 333 Member
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    Honestly I think it goes both ways. She is stupid to get with someone else man if that's the case but Its also his fault for letting it happen even if its her that wants him, there's so much he can do like change his number or got you to talk to her so what i think about this, he's going along with it. Guys will always deny deny deny!!
  • adjones5
    adjones5 Posts: 938 Member
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    I'm so sorry love.
  • ogosun
    ogosun Posts: 175 Member
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    it takes "two" to tangle..... so dont' blame the girl , he is probably sends her messages too.... daaaaa
  • ogosun
    ogosun Posts: 175 Member
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    Honestly I think it goes both ways. She is stupid to get with someone else man if that's the case but Its also his fault for letting it happen even if its her that wants him, there's so much he can do like change his number or got you to talk to her so what i think about this, he's going along with it. Guys will always deny deny deny!!



    finally a "smart women"..... your totally right on....
  • foxygirlact
    foxygirlact Posts: 98 Member
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    he is lying to you. No one deletes texts they have sent unless there is something bad in there.

    When I caught my boyfriend cheating he made up all kinds of lies to excuse his messages. It turned out the other girl was in the dark as well. So I called her and we confronted him together, face to face. A bit hard to tell each of us the other girl is a psycho when we were both sitting there
  • xMissy6x
    xMissy6x Posts: 347 Member
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    surely he would have to act at least interested for her to be sending that message. Sorry :(
  • xginanax
    xginanax Posts: 333 Member
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    Honestly I think it goes both ways. She is stupid to get with someone else man if that's the case but Its also his fault for letting it happen even if its her that wants him, there's so much he can do like change his number or got you to talk to her so what i think about this, he's going along with it. Guys will always deny deny deny!!



    finally a "smart women"..... your totally right on....

    aww thanks girl :) but i agree with what you said too and the fact she said that he deleted his text msgs, sounds a bit dodgy. I mean why would you, if you had nothing to hide right. ?
  • adjones5
    adjones5 Posts: 938 Member
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    I had almost this exact situation with my ex, I believed him when it said it was harmless. I went out of town the next week and I noticed when I got in bed my first night home I found a head band under my pillow. He had another woman in our bed. If i were in your situation I would end it with him and cut him out of your life. I would not contact the woman.
  • SuperMoniMonk
    SuperMoniMonk Posts: 467 Member
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    I called her and she didn´t pick up while he was in front of me . we couldn´t argue bc his teenage daughter was in the living room. i saw his lie in his eyes...and now all that we had planned is crushing down..and i bet he cant sleep..and im here on the computer trying to escape this bitter moment. aawwww.. i will be ok.
  • adjones5
    adjones5 Posts: 938 Member
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    I'm so sorry honey. I'm so sorry.
  • SuperMoniMonk
    SuperMoniMonk Posts: 467 Member
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    Honestly I think it goes both ways. She is stupid to get with someone else man if that's the case but Its also his fault for letting it happen even if its her that wants him, there's so much he can do like change his number or got you to talk to her so what i think about this, he's going along with it. Guys will always deny deny deny!!


    I agree she doesn´t owe me an explanation..it´s him ..who is supposed to love me. I just want to watch what he does if we call her .
    it´s his fault for letting it come to close.
  • xginanax
    xginanax Posts: 333 Member
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    I called her and she didn´t pick up while he was in front of me . we couldn´t argue bc his teenage daughter was in the living room. i saw his lie in his eyes...and now all that we had planned is crushing down..and i bet he cant sleep..and im here on the computer trying to escape this bitter moment. aawwww.. i will be ok.

    aww that's the spirit girl! be strong and we all know you can do it :)
    At first it might be hard but trust me you will look back at this and hopefully be glad that you made the right decision. There's plenty of guys out there who are waiting for you instead of waiting for another women in the corner.

    Its good that you found out now then later. :) HUGS HUGS! xx
  • Jacole18
    Jacole18 Posts: 716 Member
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    oh wow, I'm so sorry. better that you found out now before it became legal between you two. if he's cheating now, he will for sure later. i'm sorry sweetie.
  • Cr357
    Cr357 Posts: 238
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    What ever happened to forgiveness? Give him a chance to end anything that might be going on and you can have a fresh start. I mean if you were gonna marry him you must love him and walking away won't be easy. The vows you were gonna take say for better or for worse, if you make that commitment then you have to be willing to work through anything.
  • xginanax
    xginanax Posts: 333 Member
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    Honestly I think it goes both ways. She is stupid to get with someone else man if that's the case but Its also his fault for letting it happen even if its her that wants him, there's so much he can do like change his number or got you to talk to her so what i think about this, he's going along with it. Guys will always deny deny deny!!


    I agree she doesn´t owe me an explanation..it´s him ..who is supposed to love me. I just want to watch what he does if we call her .
    it´s his fault for letting it come to close.

    I agree. But if i wore you ill make sure he's not making or texting her some how to give her the thumbs up so she can back him up if she already knew he was taken. Why don't you text her off his phone when he's not around, pretend to be home and say to her "lets meet up" off-course her thinking its him, she probably will show up and then you can talk to her face to face see whats going on. Remember to delete the sent box just in-case he reads it and tells her it wasnt him texting or you can always text her of your number and pretend to be your partner by saying "hey its (name, his name not yours) sorry ran out of credits, im texting from a mates number, was wondering if you wanted to meet up today."

    or you can just leave his *kitten*. :)

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