Why I am not going to be posting on help questions anymore.

laurelderry

There are so many people on here that talk as if the way they are telling people to eat is the only way. I am fed up with people answering newbies questions with a condiscending tone. I eat the way I do because it works for my body. People out there are asking for help for a particular diet plan and people who don't like it blast them. Guess what? that wasn't what they asked!

If they want to know about how you eat, they will ask for that kind of help!

Just about ANY major diet plan is better than taking diabetes pills for the rest of your life! So, back off "know-it-alls"!
These newbies don't need the attitude. They probably feel sheepish enough just coming on here. They probably have been teased and taunted for years, just to come here and be talked down to. Great, that's what they need.

So many people like to say "it's a published fact that...." Really? You want to go there? It was also a public fact that you had to burn witches. It was also "Medically" correct to blood let. So, don't give me your lecture about this stuff.

If you want to help people, do so in a polite way. Answer their questions. Don't bash their diet. Be constructive in your criticism.

Thank you! I find it funny that there are STILL those individuals that feel like they have to argue, even with your above statement. Sheesh people. Get a life. Thanks again!

laurelderry

The simple truth is that it is always the same people. I think forum rules do not allow to "call out" members but let's all be real. If you look back through the majority of the posts where someone has been treated incorrectly - you will most likely find the same handful of people - always. You know who you are. You find ways to justify your actions in an attempt to justify treating others poorly. I hope I never find a reason to justify treating someone like they are dirt. I am human and I make mistakes but I hurt when I hurt others - whether I've done it intentionally or not. There is never a good justification for being mean - two wrongs do not make a right.

Agreed- it IS always the same handful of individuals.

LuLuSUPER

Well hello, I am a newbie without an attitude! im here to learn as much as I can to help me keep on track back to health and a cutie beach body.

So , I will watch for info and tip,tricks . etc

I just realized that I can run like the wind first thing in the morning but if i dont eat enough afterward I will pass out by 11am.

Sorry for the bad apples:Being friendly goes far! lol

laurelderry

Sadly, many members cannot distinguish between criticism of an idea and personal criticism. Just because other members may provide criticism or opinions regarding one's nutrition or exercise does not mean that they are being attacked personally.

and many members spout off useless and crap information - every time I come to the forums. I see the same "experts" popping off non stop, like they are some master wizard of MFP land.

Personally, I agree with the OP and his original post.

^^^This!

econut2000

Your "facts" may not agree with my "facts." They both might have "scientific" testing behind them, and they may totally disagree with each other.

That is when you look at the "scientific" testing behind both sides and find out about the study design, potential flaws and weaknesses of the study etc etc and you will find more often then not one side is backed with flimsy or junk science and the other with solid evidence supporting it.

I'm a scientist. You don't need to have flaws in the scientific method to come to a conclusion that is different from another. I have a paper published on a topic (without flaws! lol) that bucks all current ideas about my particular subject. Does it mean I did something wrong? No, it means that is the conclusion my data has lead me to. Is that to say that EVERY referreed paper is flawless? Absolutely not, but don't assume there's something wrong with one based on the fact it doesn't agree with another.

Back to the original topic....yes I agree, people who already have low self esteem may be here reaching out as a last ditch effort to get some help. They don't need snarky attitudes! People will generally post their opinions and I have no problem with that, but people need to take the omnipotent attitude and shove it There is no need to be an *kitten*.

sammysam82

Thank You.

sammysam82

Really Well said!!!!!!! It is not just the eating, it is also exercise. I did jumping jacks the other day and I did them for 5 minutes. I had someone comment on it "just for laughs?" My Answer: No, I am doing what I can do. 5 minutes of jumping jacks was really hard for me to do. When you go 10 years of doing nothing at all, and suffer from depression, You are not going to just jump up off the couch and run a mile. All exercise is going to be a challenge for me. But I am doing it, that's all that matters.
I am trying and I am doing. This does not go for just very over weight people. (No matter your size.) I am small. I am 5"0, I weigh 150lbs. So 150lbs to some people is not real big, That's a pretty low weight, i realize there are lots of people who dream of being that weight. But are they 5"0 like me? I should be really active and be able to lose this really quick because i only weight 150lbs...right?... NO, WRONG. It's not that easy. It's not easy.

Well said!! And BTW, 5 min of jumping jacks sounds like a lot of jacks to me. Jumping jacks are intense.

Thank You. I thought it was really hard, considering I have not done jumping jacks since I was like 17 years old. I felt sort of stupid and disappointed when that person asked if I put it on here just for laughs. Kind of hurt you know. I was actually really trying. I don't ever give advice to anyone. I do not have experience, or room to talk. I can always offer a ear to listen, and encouragement. But I don't give advice. Encouragement is about the best thing anyone can hear or give. I know that It helps me to keep going. So thank you for what you said.

GemaG

Here, here! :drinker:

jlnk

I think people need to stop being so darn sensitive...

slayerdan

There are so many people on here that talk as if the way they are telling people to eat is the only way. I am fed up with people answering newbies questions with a condiscending tone. I eat the way I do because it works for my body. People out there are asking for help for a particular diet plan and people who don't like it blast them. Guess what? that wasn't what they asked!

If they want to know about how you eat, they will ask for that kind of help!

Just about ANY major diet plan is better than taking diabetes pills for the rest of your life! So, back off "know-it-alls"!
These newbies don't need the attitude. They probably feel sheepish enough just coming on here. They probably have been teased and taunted for years, just to come here and be talked down to. Great, that's what they need.

So many people like to say "it's a published fact that...." Really? You want to go there? It was also a public fact that you had to burn witches. It was also "Medically" correct to blood let. So, don't give me your lecture about this stuff.

If you want to help people, do so in a polite way. Answer their questions. Don't bash their diet. Be constructive in your criticism.

Ok.

goalblessing

As a newbie who signed up today, I appreciate your response!:flowerforyou:

hellokathy

I don't think there's anything wrong with constructive criticism if it is put in a nice and helpful way. Especially when you see someone who posts here is doing something that you're absolutely sure will harm them in the end, it's totally okay to let them know and provide them with any important information you may have on the matter. If people just bash other people's effort, however - and luckily, I haven't witnessed this here, yet - well, that just sucks!

As a rule, I try to always ask WHY if I don't understand something. There may always been a health reason behind it or the person was advised to do what they do by a doctor or personal trainer or whoever. Which you won't know unless you ask BEFORE judging them.

christinad95

The problem is not that people need to learn how to search and find their own information, but that so much poor information is thrown around on MFP forums especially to newbies, which is really unhelpful and can be downright dangerous depending on the information and how people take it. Pointing them to good information that is reputable is absolutely helpful and requires them to do a little reading and hunting to get the most of it for them. Again, I'm talking about real science here, not some broscience articles in a magazine or online newsletter.

Everyone wants to believe that they are "different" but the truth is we are all subject to the laws of nature and physics, and the research that most of us cite here is research that applies to everyone. Yes, I understand there are people with medical or physical issues who are the exception, but if you are a healthy adult, your metabolism works just like everyone else's does. Your eating habits may differ. Your preferences may differ. Your rate of metabolism maybe SLIGHTLY different, but your the way your body works (catabolism, metabolism, etc.) is the same. The processes are universal, which is why applying information based on those pesky science publications isn't nearly as difficult as people like to make it out to be.

Admitting that you've been a bit "snarky" at times only tells me that you as well as many others should think before you post.

I do think before I post. Yes, I am blunt, but I don't engage in name-calling or other behavior, and most of my friends on MFP I've met in the forums have thanked me for my bluntness and encouragement. People who come on here expecting to be coddled and spoonfed information, which really gets them absolutley nowhere in understanding how their bodies work and what it means to lose weight and reduce risk factors. As a result, a lot of folks get sucked into the pseudoscience (low carb, HCG, no white food, etc.) that has no scientific basis for healthy adults. There's no point in treating people like ignorant schoolchildren when they are fully capable of learning and understanding the actual science behind what everyone is talking about to make a good informed decision for themselves.

The problem is that people on here get so upset if someone challenges their beliefs and end up taking it personally, at which point their capacity for absorbing new information is shot and they continue to believe whatever they want. It's sad, but it's the truth.
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There may be people that expect to be spoon fed, but lets face it, if that's their frame of mind, then they really aren't at a place where they realize the committment and self motivation behind making a lifestyle change such as losing weight. So whether they are spoon fed or preached at isn't going to make a difference. However, I feel that there is a way to encourage someone to start taking their own steps. Being supportive doesn't mean we are spoon feeding them or that we have to. It also doesn't mean that we have to make them feel bad for asking, however you mention that these scientific articles are not as difficult as people make them to be, well the point I'm trying to get at is for someone who's new and learning, it just may be confusing and overwhelming. This is why I feel we can be supportive, but not bombard them in a way that makes them make bad choices such as diet pills, etc..