What are your best comebacks?

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Replies

  • galegetsthin
    galegetsthin Posts: 1,340 Member
    Last weekend, my BFF's husband said "F you!" He was joking, but still..... this was great.

    I looked at him, batted my eyelashes and responded "You would fall in love and I would fall asleep".


    Another one for me is: "So, my mom was right" they ask what I am talking about "She TOLD me that your face would stick that way"

    and "If I wanted comeback from you, I would scrape the back of your throat" or "damn! I have run all out of S#!t$ to give" or "I dont know what your problem is, but I bet it is hard to prodounce"
  • seehawkmomma
    seehawkmomma Posts: 815

    and "If I wanted comeback from you, I would scrape the back of your throat" or "damn! I have run all out of S#!t$ to give" or "I dont know what your problem is, but I bet it is hard to prodounce"

    Yeah I love "If I wanted any lip from you'd rattle my zipper"
  • ffuunnnnyy__ggiirrll
    ffuunnnnyy__ggiirrll Posts: 431
    I'll tell a guy, "don't get your panties in a bunch, Nancy" or my favorite, from Betty White, "if I had a d1ck, this is where I'd tell you to suck it."

    But usually I just say that and start cracking up, because seriously, you so don't want a piece of this!
  • Munque
    Munque Posts: 123
    One of my best friends favorites, and I'll admit, I use it when appropriate, "call it what you want, it's going in YOUR mouth"
  • I_give_it_2_u_str8
    I_give_it_2_u_str8 Posts: 680 Member
    refusal to acknowledge their existence.

    or a knuckle sandwich.

    whichever seems appropriate at the time.
  • Galletakek
    Galletakek Posts: 285
    " O_O "
  • _binary_jester_
    _binary_jester_ Posts: 2,132 Member
    It's too bad you didn't die on your mom's boobs.
  • Beastette
    Beastette Posts: 1,497 Member
    Judo CHOP! Or a crowbar. Usually ends the conversation.
  • lyssamichelle
    lyssamichelle Posts: 1,307 Member
    "So that's the best you could come up with, after graduating high school? Do they hand diplomas out to turkeys now? Don't you have a rain storm to get too.. Maybe then you'll learn why it's a shame you can't keep your pointed little mouth shut."

    That usually gets the job done.
    I talk a lot, no one wants to listen to someone go on and on.
  • Mallory0418
    Mallory0418 Posts: 723 Member
    I don't usually "come back" when someone is trying to insult me. I find that stopping all conversation and looking at said person for 5 - 10 seconds, blinking, and saying "...K" or "....right" and continuing with my conversation works just fine. :wink:
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459
    oh yeah? why dont you say it to my face?
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    oh yeah? why dont you say it to my face?
    I'll say it to your face! You drive 2 hours south and I'll drive 2 hours north and let's do this. Come at me!
  • CaptainGordo
    CaptainGordo Posts: 4,437 Member
    oh yeah? why dont you say it to my face?
    What if they're in your face, though? Huh? Huh?!
  • minnie_the_minx
    minnie_the_minx Posts: 36
    Last weekend, my BFF's husband said "F you!" He was joking, but still..... this was great.

    I looked at him, batted my eyelashes and responded "You would fall in love and I would fall asleep".

    and "If I wanted comeback from you, I would scrape the back of your throat"

    :laugh: :laugh: i'm so gonna use these!
  • Contrary03
    Contrary03 Posts: 289 Member
    Is that the best you got?!
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