Do you think it is true that marriage...

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  • tinamatteson
    tinamatteson Posts: 125 Member
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    I'm guessing you don't have small children. They walk really slow. They ride bikes slow. The play with my weights in unsafe manners (or ride them like a horse). It's really better to work out when they aren't around AND to be active with them.

    Actually I don't have kids yet, but aren't this great physical activities to do with kids? Going to the park for a walk, planning field trips on the weekends, doing active fun stuff with the kids, riding bicycles, rollerblading, playing games outside, etc.

    Now, if you're going to have them ride bicycle or have them walk all the time, of course it defeats the purpose. But how about any of these:

    taga-stroller-bike-425ds040610.jpg

    cutout_stroller.png

    Bike_Strollers-Duo_Big.jpg

    All I'm saying is, if it wasn't possible, everybody with kids would be obese, and I know and have seen a lot of parents with more than one kid keeping a normal active life and staying in shape.

    These strollers are a great idea for when your kids are babies. But once they get a little older and want to walk, or ride bikes, you will find out how well this works! It's one of those things that you'll understand when it happens to you.:wink:
  • SergeantSunshine_reused
    SergeantSunshine_reused Posts: 5,382 Member
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    That is my nightmare! Ever since I met my current boyfriend I have been trying to improve my body to make sure I am sexy to him always. He got me a ring for Christmas and now im working even harder xD
  • YassSpartan
    YassSpartan Posts: 1,195 Member
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    That is my nightmare! Ever since I met my current boyfriend I have been trying to improve my body to make sure I am sexy to him always. He got me a ring for Christmas and now im working even harder xD

    LMAO YOU CAN DO IT!!!
  • YassSpartan
    YassSpartan Posts: 1,195 Member
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    These strollers are a great idea for when your kids are babies. But once they get a little older and want to walk, or ride bikes, you will find out how well this works! It's one of those things that you'll understand when it happens to you.:wink:

    lol I guess I'll have to wait and find out if I ever have the blessing of becoming a dad.
  • amoffatt
    amoffatt Posts: 674 Member
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    Yes, in a way it is. Most are thinner when they get married, have kids and get what I call "comfortable" and no need to impress the spouse no more. I hear people saying "dont you want to look hot for your man" My husband still thinks I am hot and he is overweight himself, should he "still look hot" for me as well??? But, my 32 year old husband had a heartattack and it is more about getting him and I healthy for each other and the kids.
  • EMarvie
    EMarvie Posts: 335 Member
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    I think it's true too.. both my hubby and i gained weight (me way more than him) - you get comfortable - but we're both working hard and getting it off -
  • lozzae85
    lozzae85 Posts: 35
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    Hmm good question but I have to say yes for me sadly I think thst is true (not that I'm actually married!) but whenever I am in a relationship I always put on about a stone/14lb's. When I'm single I feel like I have to make more of my appearance so I lose weight and I tone up.

    When I get back to being comfortable in a relatonship againt the weight slowly creeps on.................
  • paulamarsden
    paulamarsden Posts: 483 Member
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    i dont think its fair or particularly nice to say that married people stop caring or trying.

    i put on weight with my husband, for a number of reasons

    1) he can eat about 4000 cals a day and STILL not gain weight, its taken me some time to accept that "unfair" part of my life
    2) i felt more comfortable in my own skin and desired therefore not neurotic and essentially borderline ED
  • love22step
    love22step Posts: 1,103 Member
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    If I take myself and my daughter as examples, it seems to be true. As long as we were in bad marriages, we stayed slim. As soon as we entered good marriages, we became content and gained weight. Of course, adversity causes some people to overeat, so I don't recommend entering a bad marriage to control weight.

    The biggest advantage of having kids around, from the time the boys started school, was never having seconds at dinner time. The boys ate everything that wasn't already on my plate. :ohwell: I highly recommend having active, athletic boys as a means of calorie control. We did a lot of hiking, and they ran with me some, too, until I couldn't keep up with them. My girl--not so much activity or appetite.

    Getting married doesn't mean you have to gain weight, but, in any situation, you have to remain active and be mindful of what you're eating! God bless you!
  • tinamatteson
    tinamatteson Posts: 125 Member
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    i dont think its fair or particularly nice to say that married people stop caring or trying.

    i put on weight with my husband, for a number of reasons

    1) he can eat about 4000 cals a day and STILL not gain weight, its taken me some time to accept that "unfair" part of my life
    2) i felt more comfortable in my own skin and desired therefore not neurotic and essentially borderline ED

    Hahahaha! SO TRUE!
  • neaneawy
    neaneawy Posts: 146 Member
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    I would bet having children is a much bigger factor than just getting married. Once you have kids everything revolves around them, not yourselves anymore.
  • Virginia90
    Virginia90 Posts: 317 Member
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    I was fat before I was married, but I got fatter once I was married. My husband did the cooking the first couple years of marriage (it's how our schedule worked out), and he likes to make very calorie dense food - biscuits and gravy, pancakes slathered in peanut butter, etc. and I chose to eat it. We both "let ourselves go" but in different ways. I gained fat, he lost muscle(he used to be a buff military man.) We are both getting more fit now.
  • RachCx
    RachCx Posts: 10
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    I'm not married yet (this year woohoo) but when I met my fiance I put on alot of weight eating out etc. I won't let myself get fat in marriage after losing weight (fingers crossed) for my wedding! I am however looking forward to not having to diet in my honeymoon :p I'm already fantasising about it! Lol
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
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    I'm guessing you don't have small children. They walk really slow. They ride bikes slow. The play with my weights in unsafe manners (or ride them like a horse). It's really better to work out when they aren't around AND to be active with them.

    Actually I don't have kids yet, but aren't this great physical activities to do with kids? Going to the park for a walk, planning field trips on the weekends, doing active fun stuff with the kids, riding bicycles, rollerblading, playing games outside, etc.

    Now, if you're going to have them ride bicycle or have them walk all the time, of course it defeats the purpose. But how about any of these:

    taga-stroller-bike-425ds040610.jpg

    cutout_stroller.png

    Bike_Strollers-Duo_Big.jpg

    All I'm saying is, if it wasn't possible, everybody with kids would be obese, and I know and have seen a lot of parents with more than one kid keeping a normal active life and staying in shape.

    Oh I know it's possible. I'm in good shape. I'm just saying getting up early to work out is often a better idea than trying to work out WITH my children around. We do still try to be active with the children but for me that doesn't count as my work out. I'm a little more advanced than that.
  • hsmithway
    hsmithway Posts: 191
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    These strollers are a great idea for when your kids are babies. But once they get a little older and want to walk, or ride bikes, you will find out how well this works! It's one of those things that you'll understand when it happens to you.:wink:

    Haha, this is so true. When they're tiny you can put them in a stroller, or backpack, or baby seat on your bike, and when they get older they can be active with you, but there's definitely an in-between stage when they've outgrown the baby stuff, but they still don't move very fast.
  • MountainMia
    MountainMia Posts: 242 Member
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    I think it's true in general that you gain weight when you are married. But I don't think it's for the same reason. I gained, but it wasn't because I was secure in my relationship. Marriage is stressfull and it takes a lot of adjustment to accommodate another person in your lifestyle and make it healthy. If your partner isn't on board with healthy habits, then it's deffinitely tougher, but it's NEVER an excuse.

    Personal fitness is a Personal responsability. I gained weight because I didn't handle the stress and change of being a grown-up verry well. I still struggle with it... both the weight issue AND being a grown up. :grumble:
  • YassSpartan
    YassSpartan Posts: 1,195 Member
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    i dont think its fair or particularly nice to say that married people stop caring or trying.

    There was no intention to offend anyone, but I'll apologize to you feel that way.
  • Coyla
    Coyla Posts: 444 Member
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    But how does one determine the cutoff? I mean if you are no longer attracted to your spouse because of weight gain, how do you deal with that?

    All marriages have times when you will not be attracted to your spouse. That's the whole "sickness and health" part of the vows. Does anybody really pay attention to those anymore? I mean, you're just making a promise to your spouse, friends, and family, and--if you're religious--to God, but I guess they're just words.

    Ugh....

    Okay, I'm done ranting about our culture's attitudes towards marriage.

    Great points by so many here. I'm single, and I realize a big turn off for me would be a husband who isn't healthy. If he's never active and wants the cupboards packed with junk food, it's going to drag me down. But I've been around the block enough to know that not all thin people are healthy, so I would not be judging him on fatness or thinness but his lifestyle.
  • krystico
    krystico Posts: 104
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    When we got married, we got "comfortable". "Comfortable" = Relaxing at home together. In your sweats. With some ice cream... And eventually realizing you LOOK too "comfortable" - and then you join MFP!
  • tillyborn68
    tillyborn68 Posts: 14 Member
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    I gotta say, probably the fact that after marriage most couple stop complimenting each other, might have a psychological effect that contributes to gain weight and not caring anymore. In other words, Self-esteem goes down and weight goes up.
    I tend to agree with you, at least for some couples. When I was married I asked my ex-husband why he didn't open doors, bring me a glass of water after.... things like that anymore? His response was...."We are married now, the courtship is over" needless to say so is the marriage :)

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