The secrets to cutting fat and looking awesome

TheDevastator

6) When eating white rice, douse it in soy sauce to make it brown. This will confuse your body into thinking it is a brown carb aka good carb and prevent it from being stored as fat. This will also work, if you toast bread for instance and change it to a brown carb.

I like to add hot fudge or caramel to vanilla ice cream because of this.

Cait_Sidhe

If I can't find a unicorn, can I glue a horn to an irish wolfhound?

Edit: oops misread. This would be counterproductive. Or would it?

JennieAL

6 and 10 are my favorite! 10 made me laugh out loud

annie7hudds

Cracking tips! thank you.

This thread made me and my 14 year old son much cheerier on this yukky Monday morning in the cold, windy UK.

Unicorns make me think of summer..... Ha ha ha


xx

lilojoke

May I add to the list... Wear your favourite pyjamas to the gym people will understand that you got no time to dress up at 4am. I wore my blue pyjamas this morning but I workout at home.

I have tried many of these things!

LOVE this topic

JadeRabbit08

10) If Tony Horton has taught us anything, it’s that you need muscle confusion or you’ll just plateau. Personally I like to tell myself how I’m going to set PRs in squats and then walk to the squat rack, get ready to squat and then run over to the bench and bust out some sets, it thoroughly confuses your muscles since they thought they’d be doing squats that day.

This one had me absolutely cracking up.

I was going to try the bowl of sugar cubes but my unicorn ate them. What should I do?

Aid_B

3) As soon as you wake up every morning, chug a glass of ice water and hop around on your right foot, counter clockwise. It’s a known fact that your body will burn cals heating up the water, and hopping around will make it take even longer to heat up as it’s splashing around, leading to a higher calorie burn.

Does direction really matter and if so do you have to go clockwise if you live below the equater !

For Sale: Unicorn , high milage, used daily will part excahnge for Soy sauce !!!!!! :laugh:

JadeRabbit08

I want these rules printed on a tshirt I can wear to the gym.

Edited to add - twenty percent cooler if it had a unicorn on it.

Chood5

how many crunches do i have to do to have abs?

ice cream and raspberry ketones will burn the fat off, no need for crunches

Thanks Dr. Oz

moonsforeyes

Number 6 made me laugh so hard. hahahaha

tigersword

This is brilliant.

autumnk921

Bump

nutandbutter

The more you know...

brandiuntz

1) Never eat white carbs while riding a unicorn. This one is pretty self explanatory.

Dang it, knew there was a reason for my plateau...:grumble:

Brittany3914

I'd like to add the following:

*If you and a friend you're eating with eat the exact same meal, the calories cancel and it equals 0
*If a cookie is broken into pieces, there are no calories since they leaked out

Sidesteal

10) If Tony Horton has taught us anything, it’s that you need muscle confusion or you’ll just plateau. Personally I like to tell myself how I’m going to set PRs in squats and then walk to the squat rack, get ready to squat and then run over to the bench and bust out some sets, it thoroughly confuses your muscles since they thought they’d be doing squats that day.

I STILL laugh at this one, this is so damn funny.

JennieAL

6 & 10 are my faves!

billthekill

5) Not necessary, but highly recommended, invest in a casein IV drip and hook up to it every night. Otherwise you’ll be all catabolic and your muscles will waste away or your gains will be lost.

ROFL, that's good *kitten*

deedog007

Ben & Jerry's here I come

andreyako

honestly guys im a prime example of prcg67's thesis i mean just look at the great results iv gained by just reading his post last week in another thread great coach he is gotta give you a lot of credit man! thanks so much for changing my life

MyOwnSunshine

You have forgotten one of the most important tenets of weight loss:

A pound of marshmallows weighs less than a pound of lean chicken.

Therefore you should eat more light foods and less heavy foods in order to lose weight. My friend lost 10 pounds eating only cool whip for a month. I'm not sure if there was a unicorn involved, though.

twisted88

Awesome advise. Love this thread.

Seraphinablu

LOL

Awkward30

Do you have anything for me if I cut the fat but still don't look awesome? My face is unfortunate.

Aineko

3) As soon as you wake up every morning, chug a glass of ice water and hop around on your right foot, counter clockwise. It’s a known fact that your body will burn cals heating up the water, and hopping around will make it take even longer to heat up as it’s splashing around, leading to a higher calorie burn.

Does direction really matter and if so do you have to go clockwise if you live below the equater !

you have to take Coriolis effect into consideration, otherwise you won't lose any fat!

MarianneDarroch

Anyone got a unicorn I can borrow

Martucha123

can't belive i didn't stumble upon thos earlier.
I LOVE this post!

kendrafallon

2) Eat Ben and Jerry’s or Haagen Dazs 3-7 nights a week. The reason for this is that both companies use magic cows to source their cream, and it has been shown to exponentially increase fat burning.

This am I'm going to start ASAP!! Cheers m'dear for some extremely valuable pointers!! :bigsmile: :drinker:

gail2207

Bump

LondonEliza

I knew from the second I saw unicorns mentioned, this advice was going to be as dependable as he bank of England

Thank you so much, I will change all my eating habits immediately, bulk order soya sauce, fix the broken toaster (jabbing it wildly with a screwdriver while it is plugged in should work, right?) and look forward to seeing the fat flow off.

I could use a more specific carb breakdown for my weight and height - I am 3"6 wide and weigh the same as 200lbs of feathers NOT 200lbs of muscle (nasty heavy things) Could you help me with this?

Thank you, random person on a message board on the internet, YOU have changed my life. I am immediately going to do all that you advocate. YOU ROCK!