Am I a b*tch?

mnishi

A friend of mine from high school (not anyone I’m close to anymore) posted a picture of herself wearing pants much too big for her (you know, the typical weight loss pic, stretching out the waist to show the difference). Under the pic was the caption, “So, I’ve lost over a hundred pounds, what have you been up to?”
I happen to know that my friend had lap band surgery (which she failed to mention in the caption). I feel like she’s fishing for compliments, which I would be more than happy to give out if she had worked hard and lost the weight on her own. I’m really annoyed that she’s bragging about weight loss when all she did was choose to have unnecessary and invasive elective surgery. Or maybe I’m just annoyed that I’ve been working my butt off for a few lousy pounds.
What do you think?

IronSmasher

A b*tch would've pointed out that you've been 'not putting 100lbs on'

ket_the_jet

Yeah, you're a *****. She is too, but that doesn't excuse you from being petty.
-wtk

KJVBear33

I had a friend who had that surgery, but I feel as though it depends on the person..........my friend worked his *kitten* off, still does too, to lose the weight.........he just needed help doing the whole portion control thing I think which is why he did it in the first place. Some people have more trouble than others in that area I think......so you probably COULD cut her some slack.

On the flip side though, if all she's done was to do the surgery but no move to change her lifestyle habits like you and I have done, then yeah........you have the right to feel the way you do cause she took the easy route while just sitting on her butt not doing one ounce of exercise or lifestyle change for that matter.

So bottom line, it matters whether or not you work your *kitten* off to change those habits, behaviors, and totally shake things up to make room for improvement like going to the gym more.

AwesomelyAmber

No, I don't think having those feelings makes you a b*tch . I think that your feelings are probably based more on the type of person that she is, and not the way that she lost her weight.
I used to believe that bands, bypasses etc were the 'easy' way out... Until i started reading about people on here who have had it . I don't think that it is easy... I think that there are those that definately use it as something that it shouldn't be for.... Like for instance I know a girl that told the doctors that she did WW. Yep, she joined...went to meetings for a couple weeks...but ate burgers and fries at McD's all the time. Told doctors that she joined a gym...yep she did. Walking around the room doesn't count though. Bought books etc. Do I believe that she could have stopped stuffing her face and gone for a walk? Yes, yes I do. But that situation isn't EVERY situation. :flowerforyou:
You are allowed to have bitter feelings... you knew her:bigsmile:
Yes, I use a lot of emoticons... i like em. period. :laugh: :laugh:

AwesomelyAmber

Yeah, you're a *****. She is too, but that doesn't excuse you from being petty.
-wtk

Yes, yes it does. :laugh:

mnishi

No, I don't think having those feelings makes you a b*tch . I think that your feelings are probably based more on the type of person that she is, and not the way that she lost her weight.

You're probably right, she can a very boastful person. If I thought she had really tried to lose weight the hard way and couldn't, I'd probably be more inclined to cut her some slack.

Mom2rh

From what I understand, lap band is no easy street. It is a tool. So, yeah, petty, imo.

La_Amazona

I have a friend who did it too. I'm not jealous of her success. I don't think it makes you a ***** to think that way!

Plus, last time I checked MY legs looking f-ing hot from all the running, sweating, aerobics, etc I've done... I wonder what my friends' legs look like? :devil:

hbrittingham

From what I can see from your ticker, you only need to lose 40 lbs.

This person needed to lose over 100 lbs. Maybe it was medically necessary. Maybe she had health issues that needed to be addressed quickly. Whatever the reason, she chose the surgery and it was apparently successful. Why would you begrudge her that? There is a LOT of work involved both before and after lap band surgery. It's not like they go in, have a rubber band tied around their stomach and suddenly they are skinny.

I wouldn't say you were a b*tch, but I would say you are acting petty.

mnishi

Yeah, you're a *****. She is too, but that doesn't excuse you from being petty.
-wtk

Yes, yes it does. :laugh:

I knew what I was getting myself into when I typed this.

Avalonis

Yeah, you're a *****. She is too, but that doesn't excuse you from being petty.
-wtk

Yes, yes it does. :laugh:

Uh no, it doesn't. Two b!tches just make the world 2 steps closer to hell.

But for the record, unless she ACTED on those thoughts, I don't think the OP was a B just for thinking them.

Bridget0927

Yeah, you're a *****. She is too, but that doesn't excuse you from being petty.
-wtk

HAHAHHAH

mnishi

There is a LOT of work involved both before and after lap band surgery. It's not like they go in, have a rubber band tied around their stomach and suddenly they are skinny.

Honestly, that's what I thought happened. What do they have to do before and after? (Not being sarcastic, I'm curious)

Elizabeth_C34

Rule #1 of weight loss: stop competing with everyone else and focus on you.

This eliminates any problem you have in this situation.

Also, yes, it is petty to be annoyed so much by it. You will always have someone who lost faster, looks better, was able to do it easier, etc. than you. It's just part of it. Your best bet is to say, "YAY congrats" and bust your butt to hit YOUR goals.

Clarecbear82

I sense a case of the green eyed monster! If shes your friend why can't you just be happy for her.

HauteP1nk

A b!tch would have pointed it out to her and all her friends on the comment thread of her photo...lol

TDGee

Rule #1 of weight loss: stop competing with everyone else and focus on you.

This eliminates any problem you have in this situation.

Also, yes, it is petty to be annoyed so much by it. You will always have someone who lost faster, looks better, was able to do it easier, etc. than you. It's just part of it. Your best bet is to say, "YAY congrats" and bust your butt to hit YOUR goals.

Very well stated. Please accept this Takei Oh My as a token of my respect.

AlsDonkBoxSquat

without reading the post, if you have to ask then I think the answer is obvious.


edit: now that i've read the post, i see my gut instinct was correct.

missbp

What do you think?

I think . . . To each their own. I would just say, congrats on your weight loss. Keep up the good work. And then move on.

I really believe that a healthier lifestyle includes being at peace with who you are. You are working hard to reach your goals. You should be proud of that. Period! What other people do, or do not do, does not change or diminish what you are doing.

Keep up the great work!

Michelle

mgmlap

For some..Lap Band surgery is necessary....for others..they can do without. I think the main issue you have is that she didnt do a full disclosure.

I know for myself..I did post a pic on FB...to show others what I did...and people did ask..I said I changed my diet and exercised like a mad woman..

And if she hasnt changed her ways..that weight will creep back up..It doesnt matter at the end if you get to the goal..its if you can maintain it..

onedayillbamilf

I would say both you and her are running a pretty tight race.

Classalete

committomittxoxo

Down girl............

jackpotclown

Life's too short to worry about other people's crap in comparison to yours

inetgirl

A b*tch would've pointed out that you've been 'not putting 100lbs on'

this^^

AwesomelyAmber

Yeah, you're a *****. She is too, but that doesn't excuse you from being petty.
-wtk

Yes, yes it does. :laugh:

Uh no, it doesn't. Two b!tches just make the world 2 steps closer to hell.

But for the record, unless she ACTED on those thoughts, I don't think the OP was a B just for thinking them.

The little laughing icon was meant to show that i was joking around... I'm sorry that it made you believe that I was a b*tch... No, actually I am not sorry. Not sorry at all for that... super sorry that you are so serious though! Yikes!

sillygoose1977

Why shouldn't she be proud of her loss no matter what steps she had to take to get there?

SwannySez

Given your stated understanding (or lack thereof) of the lap band process, I don't think it makes you particularly petty or *****y. But I would suggest that before you snark on someone for something that you take a moment and look into what it is they did so you don't end up looking like you don't know what you're talking about.

That said, I am jealous of every one of you buggers who've lost so much weight around here. I mean to tell you! I look and see 20, 30, 40, 50, 100 lbs lost and I am both impressed and humbled. So I naturally get all envious!

My1985Freckles

Lapband really isn't an easy way out. My hubby had the lapband and I see him struggle everyday still to lose weight. He has lost 69 pounds and works every bit as hard as I do to lose weight. Lapband won't work without a lifestyle change. You have to completely change your attitude towards food. The portions are tiny. Just because it isn't 100% tough in the same ways doesn't mean it isn't tough.

Meloonie

I wouldn't say that having invasive surgery like that is easy. Neither is not being able to eat hardley anything for the rest of your life because you can't phycisally fit it in your stomach, and I expect she has probably been exercising too. I dont think people that decide to go down the surgery route are taking the decision lightly. Its different for all of us. Its still an acheivement that she is proud of and I'm sure she'll be proud of you for the effort you're putting in too. I wouldn't say you're being a *****, maybe just not thinking it through from her perspective.