Would you date someone whose religion is different than your

alharbour

I usually stay out of arguments that involve "religion" but I am gonna chime in on this one. First off, I am a Christian and I do not believe in "religion" and I do not practice "religion". I have a personal relationship with my Savior, Jesus Christ. I am saved by GRACE, because I am a sinner and I deserve the punishment that Christ took for me on the cross. That being said, I believe as a born again Christian, you should marry one, not someone from another religion. And I certainly would never marry someone who claims there is no GOD. The Bible states you cannot serve two masters, because you will love one and hate the other. Therefore, I see being unequally yoked as trying to serve two masters, one wordly and one Godly. There is a good Christian man out there for you, just pray for God to bring him into your life. Seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added unto you.

katiew00t

Wow what bigotry and ntolerance. Brainwashing your children to believe in the same myths and fairy tales is child abuse. I should know, I spent years trying to escape the dogmatic fear of hell. Dumping someone just because he or she doesn't share your made up religion is childish and pathetic. One day he will get over you and find someone better then you and someone with brains who wouldn't put their children through that.

GEE, Thanks! How do you know that he didn't break up with me? You don't! Once again, the question I asked was, "WOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE WHOSE RELIGIOUS BELIEFS DIFFER FROM YOURS?"

MarySunshine70

Anyone else out there who's been married a long, long time (20 +) may agree with me when I say that any relationship you want to last the test of time needs all the cards stacked. Some time or another, your faith in GOD may be the only thing that keeps you together & you'll be so glad for it once the "crisis" time is over.

holly1283

You need to decide what is important to you. If you have a genuine relationship with God, do not compromise with someone who does not. Being a chrstian is not a religion it is a personal relationship with God. Having to be the person to do all of the religious training even though my husband did not object can be difficult. Those who do not believe is their choice but do not be intolerant with snide remarks at those of us who chose to raise our children to love the Lord.

TheNewDodge

Jesus loves all of you very much

lukeout007

I don't believe in religion and question all underlying belief I may have in god.

With that said...anyone who states they won't allow their children to go to church is ridiculous. People, Including children, should have the right to make their own decisions about their beliefs.

ThisisMiss

I was raised Catholic, but since I was very little, I learned quickly that I did not agree with most of their beliefs. I did get confirmed even though I did not want to and even told my family and my church that. They told me to just do it anyway. I follow a more Agnostic belief system. My daughter's father is Russian Orthodox. He was going to become a priest, but obviously ended up not going down that path. So, needless to say, he is pretty religious. I believe that our daughter should learn about ALL religions and decide for herself what she believes, if anything. Of course, he wants her to go down a more Orthodox belief system, but I am adamant that she should decide that for herself when she is old enough. He is okay with that.

lukeout007

I don't believe in religion and question all underlying belief I may have in god.

With that said...anyone who states they won't allow their children to go to church is ridiculous. People, Including children, should have the right to make their own decisions about their beliefs.

Although with that said...forcing your children to go to church is just as bad.

seonf

Oh yeah and my dad is an atheist and mum is a Christian. It does work out and some Christians would date outside their religion.

10036

I wouldn't date someone who is religious. I have a very religious family and it bothers me to no end. I'm not sure how it goes with the casually religious--people who call themselves members of some random denomination of this religion or that, and never take it too seriously. But for really religious people, it seeps into all the little parts of their lives. Can lead to unnecessary distaste for your significant other. No thanks.

seonf

I don't believe in religion and question all underlying belief I may have in god.

With that said...anyone who states they won't allow their children to go to church is ridiculous. People, Including children, should have the right to make their own decisions about their beliefs.

Yes but children should have the right to decide if they WANT TO go to church or not without being forced to by well meaning parents.

tjamuna1

i think alot of people need to stop praising / praying to jesus and more of the most high
you might not see it but when you pray to jesus/mary/saints your praying to idols and being a pagan

lukeout007

I don't believe in religion and question all underlying belief I may have in god.

With that said...anyone who states they won't allow their children to go to church is ridiculous. People, Including children, should have the right to make their own decisions about their beliefs.

Yes but children should have the right to decide if they WANT TO go to church or not without being forced to by well meaning parents.

Agreed. Read my next comment...I added that in.

broekte

This whole thread is very disappointing. The OP only asked if she should consider taking back her ex because he is willing to compromise on religion. She wasn't asking for a diatribe from everyone whether or not they are believers or not. I guess it is a post about religion though and gave people a chance to get on their soapbox. As for the actual question I will say I think it will be very hard to make a relationship work without having similar beliefs if you want to bring kids in the world. They will have many questions and if you are not on the same page it sends a very mixed signal and will confuse them terribly.

lukeout007

i think alot of people need to stop praising / praying to jesus and more of the most high
you might not see it but when you pray to jesus/mary/saints your praying to idols and being a pagan

Pretty sure the validity of religion is not the original intent of the topic.

Colbyandsage

I'm an Athiest and would prefer to date Athiests and Agnostics. Blind faith is just not something I can be intimate with as a woman of science.

I wouldn't want my kids to go to church unless I'd educated them about all the different ideas about the origin of the universe and they personally decided to explore that religion.

I second this. You summed it up perfectly.

As an athest, I couldn't date anyone religious but that is my personal opinion. Seriously the comments about god make me nuts most days!! Am I going to the freedom rally, no... because I believe religious views r personal. I don't push them on my children or anyone. I do the opposite and educate them on all religions

SueGremlin

Wow what bigotry and ntolerance. Brainwashing your children to believe in the same myths and fairy tales is child abuse. I should know, I spent years trying to escape the dogmatic fear of hell. Dumping someone just because he or she doesn't share your made up religion is childish and pathetic. One day he will get over you and find someone better then you and someone with brains who wouldn't put their children through that.

Am I the only one who spots the irony in this?

Hello? This is bigoted and intolerant.

I am an atheist and would not reject someone based on religion, but we'd have to have a heart to heart about our priorities and what is important to us. We may not be compatible.

seonf

No. I am not religious and I wouldn't date sOmeone who was.

I would as long as they didn't keep trying to convert me. I just wish we could all get along, religious differences shouldn't be such an issue.

Snapplejac

I couldn't cope with a religious partner. I like to share the same world views and feel that we're on the same page. I respect other's beliefs (as long as they don't try to inflict them on others) but I just couldn't take a guy seriously if he believed in some sort of creationism! Fortunately my man is also scientifically minded!

JinxRita

I've been through several religions in my lifetime. I'm still not settled with one, and don't think I ever will. I've "dabbled" in being a Catholic, Wiccan, Christian, and Agnostic. Right now, I moreso tend to just proclaim myself as "spiritual" because that's what it is. To each their own.

My boyfriend is Catholic, and he absolutely wants church to be a part of his not-yet-existent children's futures. I personally have nothing against it. It might help that I was raised Catholic, but honestly...it's not going to harm a kid to have two different view points. In fact, it might make them very open minded. If it is handled honestly and maturely, there should be tons of room for open discussions about religion. After all, maybe your kids won't turn out to be Christian anyways. They have to choose for themselves, and they'll be exposed to someone who believes something else at some point in ther lives anyways. What's the difference if it comes from Dad?

It could make things like marriage interesting, too. Do you hold it in a church? Is that comfortable with him? Have discussions with him, be open about it. After all, if there is a God, he created us all, and loves us all equally (I believe, anyways) and if the person that is right for you doesn't do exactly as you do on one day of the week, that's okay!

Look into your heart, pray on it, and most of all - talk to the man! Be honest and open about what you both want and expect.

alharbour

i think alot of people need to stop praising / praying to jesus and more of the most high
you might not see it but when you pray to jesus/mary/saints your praying to idols and being a pagan

The Trinity...God in 3 persons. God the Father, God the Son (Jesus), and God the Holy Spirit. I pray to God in Jesus name. There is only one name by which man can be saved, and that is Jesus!

mikey1976

My last relationship ended because he is Agnostic and I am a Christian. We finally had the "religion talk" and he said he wouldn't allow his children to go to church. That was a big deal to me, considering I grew up going to church 2x/week. I told him I couldn't raise children without bringing them to church, so we broke up.

Now that we have been apart for several months, I have been actually excited to meet someone with the same beliefs as me, because I have never made religion a priority in my dating life before.

Well..now my ex has changed his tune a little, and says he'd allow his children to go to church. He misses me, still loves me, etc, etc, and wants to get back together. Great! But is he going to ignore everything relating to God except the going to church part? For example, if I am having a conversation about God to my kids, is he just going to leave the room? I really don't see how I can keep God in my life AND my ex at the same time.

How important do you think it is to date someone who has the same religious beliefs as you? I want your opinions, please!

your question yes i would date some one who has or dosen't have religion this might get me in trouble but i wouldn't date a jehovah's witnesses just because i don't share there ideas not even a little bit.

but for situation my two cents just because he says they can go to church is he going to allow the blessing of the food, or daily prayers, or even bible studies. i think your in for an upset sorry to say

kaetra

I'm a non-denominational Christian and I've been married to a Mormon for 10 years. I respect his religion and he respects my spirituality.

Shortly after our daughter was born I went to church with him a few times to see what it was all about. I only attended the activity-type things and not the actual service. I got to meet the people of the church - who were all very kind and not nearly as "weird" as I thought they would be. There are many things I respect about my husband's faith (importance of family, none of their pastors receive a salary from the church, everyone helps each other out, etc.) - However there are lots of things about the Mormon faith I simply do not agree with and could never, ever agree with (the super-high status elevation of the founder is a big point of contention for me, really big). My husband and I talked about all these things and he understands how I feel. He could go to his church any time and it would not bother me, but for our daughter we both decided that she can make her own choice when she is old enough to do so.

Meanwhile her exposure to spirituality, generic religious teachings and God is given to her with a light heart by my husband and I jointly. And we've explained to her that there are many different religions, and that no one religion has the sole keys to the kingdom, in terms a child can understand. The other exposure she has is Veggie Tales. She loves Veggie Tales.

I truly wish I could find a good church that we could all go to together, but we haven't been able to find one. Everywhere we've went I "smell a rat" somewhere. I admit I am a very religion-suspicous person if that makes sense. In other words I love God very much, but I'm not a huge fan of Religion. There's just too much that Man can do to to twist things and/or take advantage of people.

But our marriage is working out quite well in this respect. I don't think anyone is doing themselves a favor by deciding to completely eliminate giving someone a chance based solely on religion. Of course there are some situations that are just not going to work out. But there are many situations where things can be worked out. It's a big world and there are lots of things to learn out there. Ultimately though you have to find your own path, the one that's right for you.

manda1002

I was raised Roman Catholic (never baptized though, so I must be going to hell right?) but am now agnostic. My husband was raised Pentecostal, now agnostic. But those were OUR choices. I think religious is a personal thing, that people can work with. If you're a Saturday morning church goer, make that your 'me time" and then offer him the same for his religion, or sports, or whatever floats his boat. As for children, we have 2 small boys, and we're leaving it up to them. If they someday decide that they want to go to every church in a 50 mile radius just to see whats out there, then I will drive them. Who am I to tell them what to believe in. I don't believe that having a God in their lives will make them good or bad people.

But this is MY opinion. I respect everyone elses opinions, and it's interesting to read what everyone has been saying.

KemahSunshine

I usually stay out of arguments that involve "religion" but I am gonna chime in on this one. First off, I am a Christian and I do not believe in "religion" and I do not practice "religion". I have a personal relationship with my Savior, Jesus Christ. I am saved by GRACE, because I am a sinner and I deserve the punishment that Christ took for me on the cross. That being said, I believe as a born again Christian, you should marry one, not someone from another religion. And I certainly would never marry someone who claims there is no GOD. The Bible states you cannot serve two masters, because you will love one and hate the other. Therefore, I see being unequally yoked as trying to serve two masters, one wordly and one Godly. There is a good Christian man out there for you, just pray for God to bring him into your life. Seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added unto you.

:flowerforyou: Thank You!!! You said it Perfectly!!!

Shellitz

I don't subscribe to any form of religion. My mother was raised a strict Catholic, but she made the decision when we were born that she would allow us to make our own choices when it comes to faith. She answered all "God" questions that we had, sharing with us what she was taught, how she felt, and some examples of what other people believed. I must say i am so glad she treated the subject this way.

I believe in being a good person, I believe in respecting each others rights to an opinion. I don't belive in organized religion. But on the other hand I don't mind if my children are exposed to religious education, as long as it is objectively informative and not idea pushing. I wouldn't take them to church as a rule, but if they asked me if they could go I would either let them go with a friend or take them myself so they can find out if they like it or not.

My partner has the same beliefs on religion as me - although he was more black and white about it at the start - delcaring that he would never allow his children to go to any form of church or attend religious studies at school. Now that we've discussed it at length he has realised that he was being too closed minded about it.

I think it would be hard to overcome a difference in religious positions in a relationship - BUT if you are a good match in every other way you will find a way to work it out. Two close friends of mine are a devout catholic/agnostic couple and they just agree to disagree. She takes the children to church with her for now but they have a mutual agreement that they will never push the kids into it unwillingly.

I think they key is to remove emotion from the discussion. Just talk about it as objectively as possible.

keh40

I am a Roman Catholic and have been raised in the church. Honestly, dating or marrying anyone of a different belief never turns out well. It causes far too much tension in a relationship and major conflicts emerge that typically turn "love" into "hatred". I have seen this happen countless times with teens and adults who date Protestants or even agnostics/atheists. I am not saying that differences are unhealthy in a relationship. But I am saying that something as fundamental as your faith is something that you want your bf/husband to have the same views as you. Your faith should bring yourselves closer to each other and God. Not bring you apart.

walkwithme1

i think you were right to break up with him. It is really important to date and marry someone who has the same beliefs as you, same faith and practice helps too. (there are different flavors to each denomination)

I wouldn't date anyone who doesn't believe like me. I have thought about it a couple times in the past, but the first time it didn't work out, for which I am glad, and then the last time, it just was not even going to happen. God protects us.

^^^this

LemonBurns

I am Christian, too... and 15 years ago my boyfriend wasn't. I had always said, that I wouldn't marry a man who wasn't a Christian because my faith is such a big part of my life - it makes me who I am, affects how I think and how I do things. I couldn't fathom ignoring the biggest part of my life, let alone having the most important person in my life not 'getting' what makes me, me... But he asked me to marry him, and I loved him so I said yes... but my need for a Christian husband took over and we broke up (we went thru this routine twice) before she started to 'look into' my religion more seriously. He, at one point, decided that he could be a Christian, so he became one... prayed the 'sinners prayer' and really took it seriously... it was wonderful! So we got married, and it was all different after that. He told me that he was 'faking' it for me, and that he just said it so I would marry him - I was hurt! We have now been married for almost 12 years now, and for the most part we are happy - except when we talk about faith - ya, the biggest part of me life! We have 2 kids, and whenever they have questions about God/Jesus - he sends them to me for answers - He will go to church with me every now and then if I ask him too, BUT he makes sure I know that he's 'only going for me'. Would I trade my life? or would I want to be married to someone else? NO WAY! But I will tell you, it is not always easy to be 'unequally yoked'.

firesoforion

I pretty much agree with your position. Now, I wasn't raised going to church, and I wasn't raised particularly religious (borderline agnostic, generally believing in God but with total freedom to believe what we chose), but I do care about giving my children an environment in which religion isn't looked down upon, even by just one parent. They'll get enough of that elsewhere. I wouldn't have a relationship with someone who was anti-religious, or generally had strong views that I had a problem with my children learning.