Girls. . we need guidance. .

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Cameron_1969
Cameron_1969 Posts: 2,857 Member
in Chit-Chat
We want you . . constantly.. . .but you don't.. (not constantly).. .we try candles (lame) we try dinner (oh. . . he's just hoping to get lucky). . we try flowers (he knows he screwed up). . we try cleaning the house! . . . ok. . .we don't do that very often. . but the point is. . we try! and mostly. it's to make you love us. . not just to make you scr*w us. . . we like you ..and we want you to like us too. . why do you find it so hard to hook us up with some appreciation. ... an acknowledgement and a hug will do. We work hard for you...
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Replies

  • misskerouac
    misskerouac Posts: 2,242 Member
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    Id like to help you out with an answer but my husband does none of those things. He doesn't even make his own dentist appointments.
  • Cameron_1969
    Cameron_1969 Posts: 2,857 Member
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    Id like to help you out with an answer but my husband does none of those things. He doesn't even make his own dentist appointments.

    Well.. .he loves you right? I have a 5 year old kid.. . sometimes you just have to train them. . lol
  • dawnkykong
    dawnkykong Posts: 64 Member
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    My husband doesn't get me flowers (as much as I'd like) or light candles for me...but he's amazing and I tell him often. Maybe you just haven't found the right girl?
  • Natx83
    Natx83 Posts: 1,308 Member
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    So keen to find the find the right girl, 29 this year, not freaking out but very keen.

    Seems like you can do all the right things sometimes but they won't always be the right things for that person. Or sometimes they are just an unappreciative b&tch lol.

    One day...... Sigh :)
  • blueeyedcristi
    blueeyedcristi Posts: 304 Member
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    I didn't know flowers still existed.
  • kissy28wv
    kissy28wv Posts: 74
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    My husband has never bought me a live flower but he did buy me new lug nuts for my tires.
  • cohophysh
    cohophysh Posts: 288
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    OMG, we are pathetic...
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
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    I actually don't like getting cut flowers. lol. I've told my husband this - so he gets me chocolates or potted flowers instead. We go out to dinner a lot, he takes our son to spend time with so that I can have time to myself. He helps me cook dinner often and always does the dishes afterwards. He works his *kitten* off every day and sometimes even into the night doing what I would consider a very demanding job so that I don't have to. He gives me money every week, just to spend on myself. He tells me I'm beautiful every day, among other wonderful things that I never get tired of hearing. He's more than generous in all aspects of our relationship. He's just all around amazing and everything I could ever want in a partner. :happy: I definitely try my best to show my appreciation for him every day and to give what I get back to him. I'm a very lucky woman. :heart:

    If your partner can't recognize the things you do for him / her to show your love, there's a problem somewhere! I think it's important those affections and actions go both ways.
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    I personally have never been the lovey dovey person. If I care for you, if I let you sleep at my place, if I call you my woman, if I work hard to provide for you, if I take care of YOUR kids and try to become a good male figure in their lives, thats my way of saying I love you.

    Also, while we at it, please, do not think I'm afraid of commitment or responsibility. I'm a responsible person and that is exactly why I dont jump into labeling the relationship or having kids. I have to think of the future as a man. How am I going to feed the kids? What kind of a parent would I be? How can I bring this child in this F'd up world? Can I handle the responsibility of having a daughter who might endup having big time daddy issues? Would my son make the same mistakes as I did when I was a kid? These questions drive me crazy and THATS my reason to not want kids.

    Edit: yes I know my post didnt made alot of sense. Just try to understand that we are trying our best for the family and sometimes that might keep us from being the romantic person :)
  • grizzlymaze
    grizzlymaze Posts: 185 Member
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    Try doing the love dare. If there is/was love, than eventually it will break through. My wife has an unending love and forgivness for me, and I am in the middle of recovery from a very hard addiction. This has been a rough road, but the light is at the end of the tunnel. I know it is because I know that in the end she will still be there and I will have conquered this thing we call sin. I hope that someday your lady will see the good that you have done. Just don't stop what you are doing.
  • dawnkykong
    dawnkykong Posts: 64 Member
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    I actually don't like getting cut flowers. lol. I've told my husband this - so he gets me chocolates or potted flowers instead. We go out to dinner a lot, he takes our son to spend time with so that I can have time to myself. He helps me cook dinner often and always does the dishes afterwards. He works his *kitten* off every day and sometimes even into the night doing what I would consider a very demanding job so that I don't have to. He gives me money every week, just to spend on myself. He tells me I'm beautiful every day, among other wonderful things that I never get tired of hearing. He's more than generous in all aspects of our relationship. He's just all around amazing and everything I could ever want in a partner. :happy: I definitely try my best to show my appreciation for him every day and to give what I get back to him. I'm a very lucky woman. :heart:

    If your partner can't recognize the things you do for him / her to show your love, there's a problem somewhere! I think it's important those affections and actions go both ways.

    Pretty much how mine is and how I feel.:)

    You should def try and find someone who appreciates you... And if after 10 years of being with that person, they still give you butterflies, you've got a winner. I say 10 years because that's how long we've been together, hope that one day I can say 20/30/50..... Good luck to you.
  • kissy28wv
    kissy28wv Posts: 74
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    That was my point.:smile: ...He never brings me flowers but shows he cares in a more subtle way. Its actually more romantic to see the boy in him. :flowerforyou:
  • AliciaBeth78
    AliciaBeth78 Posts: 437 Member
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    We want you . . constantly.. . .but you don't.. (not constantly).. .we try candles (lame) we try dinner (oh. . . he's just hoping to get lucky). . we try flowers (he knows he screwed up). . we try cleaning the house! . . . ok. . .we don't do that very often. . but the point is. . we try! and mostly. it's to make you love us. . not just to make you scr*w us. . . we like you ..and we want you to like us too. . why do you find it so hard to hook us up with some appreciation. ... an acknowledgement and a hug will do. We work hard for you...

    I think you should work on cleaning the house more :)
  • cschmidt45
    cschmidt45 Posts: 37
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    You sound lonely and unappreciated in your past. You haven't met the right woman yet or you wouldn't be asking those questions. Its a sad fact that we are a throw away society and demand instant gratification. But, a true relationship lasts and only through perserverence, dedication, commitment and connection. There is someone out there for you that will offer all those wonderful things and accept the gifts you mentioned wholeheartedly. All things, I'm sure you are deserving of. Just look beyond the superficial to find her.
  • Carnivorekat
    Carnivorekat Posts: 370 Member
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    not all women think you are just trying to sc**w them when you are romantic, maybe you are trying to impress the wrong girls. Most women that I know like their men to try and show some romance in whatever way they want - but it is also wise to listen to the woman to find out the right thing they would like
  • MsFitnFabulous
    MsFitnFabulous Posts: 432 Member
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    So keen to find the find the right girl, 29 this year, not freaking out but very keen.

    Seems like you can do all the right things sometimes but they won't always be the right things for that person. Or sometimes they are just an unappreciative b&tch lol.

    One day...... Sigh :)


    Haha I just turned 32 with no prospects so I feel your pain. I personally like the "little" things like watching a movie we both like together. Those cute texts that say I'm thinking about you. Food is also great (maybe I shouldn't own up to that on mfp). Long walks where we can either talk or just enjoy the comfortable silence. If all else fails take a couple masseuse classes and melt her into submission lol!!
  • i_love_vinegar
    i_love_vinegar Posts: 2,092 Member
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    i just spent $100+ on lingerie and bought chocolates for my bf ^_^ last time i went to his house, i hid cookies for him to find <3

    i also bought a bunch of foods i think he will like and spent the day practicing how to make various meals for him (since I only use a rice cooker to make food with, I have to practice to make sure things come out right ex today i practiced making a tuna melt, egg salad sandwich, bacon/eggs/toast and i have sauerkraut and sausage/thai green curry soup and peanut chicken satay to try out next time).

    anyway, we've only been dating around one month so far, but our first date he gave me a box of chocolates, and our last date he gave me a box of chocolates (although i forgot it...) and took me to hot springs and a lot of fun places such as the beach, sushi, petting zoo etc. he texts me really sweet msgs throughout the day, and i try and reciprocate.

    my bf is sweet, and i try and be sweet back. i think u just have to find the right person...or maybe practice pleasing a woman more during sex~that way she'll be happy if you want to have sex.

    Good luck!
  • brittanyjeanxo
    brittanyjeanxo Posts: 1,831 Member
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    My hubs worked a third last night (12 am to 8 am) so I left him a little note in his cooler and a mini chocolate bar to let him know I love him and appreciate him. In return he brought me home 2 bouquets, one of daisies, one of lillys (my fave!) and also a box of Lucky Charms ('cause I like the marshmallows), a bottle of V8 peach mango juice, and bacon! ^.^ He's such a sweetheart. And I know he didn't do it to "get some" either.

    Sometimes, ladies, if you want all those nice things, perhaps YOU should be the one to surprise HIM with something. It can't always fall on him.
  • SueGremlin
    SueGremlin Posts: 1,066 Member
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    We want you . . constantly.. . .but you don't.. (not constantly).. .we try candles (lame) we try dinner (oh. . . he's just hoping to get lucky). . we try flowers (he knows he screwed up). . we try cleaning the house! . . . ok. . .we don't do that very often. . but the point is. . we try! and mostly. it's to make you love us. . not just to make you scr*w us. . . we like you ..and we want you to like us too. . why do you find it so hard to hook us up with some appreciation. ... an acknowledgement and a hug will do. We work hard for you...
    First of all, speaking to women as a collective unit makes me bristle. If your partner is not appreciative of you, that is a relationship problem. Don't blame women for that!
  • _Christine_
    _Christine_ Posts: 1,388 Member
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    But do you listen to her and laugh at her lame jokes?

    … or maybe that’s just me. ;)

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