Worst pick up lines you've ever heard?

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  • lulu9663
    lulu9663 Posts: 57 Member
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    Dude licks thumb, wipes it on my shirt. Licks his thumb again, wipes it on his shirt. Then says: "Let's get out of these wet clothes." Then he winks.... Creeeepyyyyy
  • Warmbloodwear
    Warmbloodwear Posts: 387 Member
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    You are so lucky I showed up, now you don't have to go home alone.

    Wow you look better close up.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • DavetheHYNIC
    DavetheHYNIC Posts: 318 Member
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    I had a chick ask me this Fri " why my wife let's me come out the house without my wedding ring "

    I had another one ask me a few weeks ago " did i think my girl would mind if she bought me a drink"

    thirsty females.........
  • ErinBeth7
    ErinBeth7 Posts: 1,625 Member
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    I'm a professional baseball player, so you want to sleep with me now right? uhhhh NO!

    Sad thing is, I might. OH Lord I do like baseball players.
  • LilRedPitViper
    LilRedPitViper Posts: 104
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    "Smell my finger"

    ....I did. And ended up marrying him.
  • Warmbloodwear
    Warmbloodwear Posts: 387 Member
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    "Do your pants have a mirror in them, cause I can see my self in them"
  • OLFATUG
    OLFATUG Posts: 393 Member
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    "Let's skip the small talk, what do you want for breakfast?"
  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
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    I don't really have lines, but just for the pure d-bag route, I have said, "I don't need to know your name, I just wanna know if you're down to *kitten*. While you're marinating on that, I'll be talking to your friend."

    Has a 20% success rate.
  • laughingnome
    laughingnome Posts: 259 Member
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    2 A.M. "I've been looking for the prettiest girl here and I finally found you"
  • AtticusFinch
    AtticusFinch Posts: 1,263 Member
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    "You have the right to remain silent, you have the right to a solicitor. Are you going to come quietly?"
  • pobski
    pobski Posts: 42 Member
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    You going to be walking alone to your car later?
  • legnarevocrednu
    legnarevocrednu Posts: 467 Member
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    Him: "how much does a polar bear weigh?"
    Me: "Oh gee, I don't know. I suppose around 1000 lbs."
    Him: "Uhh....enough to break the ice. Can I get your number?"

    I actually think that's cute in a cheesy way! lol
  • jackpotclown
    jackpotclown Posts: 3,291 Member
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    I actually had a girl come up to me once and say "I have a name" before ever saying anything beforehand....to which I replied "good for you, it's important to be able to identify yourself"
  • Fockertots
    Fockertots Posts: 221
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    I've had a guy come up to me, put his arm around me, start shaking my body and say, "I really like your peaches wanna shake your tree."

    I've had guys ask me where I got "your tits" and I always answer with, "They're home grown."

    I've had guys ask me what time I get off (as they smirk at their friend) to which I reply, "Hopefully before you do. And I'd assume that'll be hard to do with you........." then walk away...

    Hm....... more?

    "How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice....." yes, it really happened.
  • Nikkei24
    Nikkei24 Posts: 282 Member
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    A guy who was a harry potter look a like asked me if I wanted to come stay the night at his place after the bar. (I had just met him maybe 10 min before that) I said no and he said "But I just cleaned my room" WTF? Was that supposed to be incentive for me to go home with you. It sounds like something you tell your mom when you're a kid so you can go out to play. Needless to say I did not go home with him but it was a really good laugh for me and my friends.
  • CrazyDaisysMommy
    CrazyDaisysMommy Posts: 472
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    During my brief time on an online dating site: "Unlike most men, I find tall women very attractive." Uh, thank you?
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,829 Member
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    "Say girl, lemme holla at you."

    First of all, technically you're already "holla"ing at me, second of all, no.
  • Fockertots
    Fockertots Posts: 221
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    "You have the right to remain silent, you have the right to a solicitor. Are you going to come quietly?"

    This one made me laugh pretty hard...
  • MrsCon40
    MrsCon40 Posts: 2,351 Member
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    "Wait, are you gay?".... because I go to mostly gay dance clubs in San Francisco.

    My response is usually, "no, but if you're my only option I'm considering changing teams."
  • silvabelle89
    silvabelle89 Posts: 76
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    "Let's skip the small talk, what do you want for breakfast?"

    Hahahaha wait I love this one!

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