CHEESY JOKES THREAD

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  • Moyzilla
    Moyzilla Posts: 106 Member
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    What's the difference between roast pork and pea soup??

    -Anyone can roast a pork...
  • NWCyclingBeast
    NWCyclingBeast Posts: 157 Member
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    What do you call a blind deer? No eye deer!
  • utahgirl247
    utahgirl247 Posts: 370 Member
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    did you hear about the constipated mathmatician? he worked it out with a pencil.

    hee, hee, hee!!
  • tabulator32
    tabulator32 Posts: 701 Member
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    A duck walks into a drug store and asks if they have Chapstick. When the cashier reaches for a tube of it, the duck says "Put it on my bill."
  • Sox90716
    Sox90716 Posts: 976 Member
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    What do you get when you mix a pen!s and a potato? A dic-tator.
  • _SpeshK_
    _SpeshK_ Posts: 496 Member
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    How do you get a tissue to dance?

    Put a little boogey in it!
  • Trechechus
    Trechechus Posts: 2,819 Member
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    What's brown and sounds like a bell?
    ... Dung.

    What's red and goes up and down?
    ...A cranberry in an elevator.

    How to you catch a rabbit?
    ... Hide behind a tree and make a noise like a carrot.
  • Bobby_Clerici
    Bobby_Clerici Posts: 1,828 Member
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    I recall that one about the nuns doing push-ups in the cucumber patch.....it was terrible :noway:

    That was just over the top.
    I am thankful it was removed.
  • shanae727
    shanae727 Posts: 546 Member
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    ah, i can't forget my all-time favorite (thank you laffy taffy wrapper)!

    what is the best time to go to the dentist?
    tooth-hurty.

    had to steal that one. HILARIOUS!!!!
  • phtbtmgrl
    phtbtmgrl Posts: 29
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    Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes?

    A: Fshhh


    Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

    A: Because he felt crumby


    A buddhist walks up to a hot dog vender and says, "Make me one with everything."
  • 1960HikerDude
    1960HikerDude Posts: 215 Member
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    A horse walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says "Hey! Why the long face?"
  • 1960HikerDude
    1960HikerDude Posts: 215 Member
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    What's the difference between a job and a wife? Ten years later the job still sucks.
  • 1960HikerDude
    1960HikerDude Posts: 215 Member
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    How do you make a hormone? Don't pay her.
  • skybird455
    skybird455 Posts: 172 Member
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    how many men does it take to spread a drive way?

    only one if you spread him real thin.

    :0)
  • TexanThom
    TexanThom Posts: 778
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    Whats the difference between a woman in a bathtub and a woman in church?





    The woman in church has a soul full of hope.
  • 1960HikerDude
    1960HikerDude Posts: 215 Member
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    What's the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer? The prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again.
  • Trechechus
    Trechechus Posts: 2,819 Member
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    Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
    ... To get to the bottom!
  • Alexstrasza
    Alexstrasza Posts: 619 Member
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    My favorite joke as a child:

    Me: What are you eating under there?
    Victim: Under Where?
    Me: Ewww you were eating underwear!?!?
  • jennaworksout
    jennaworksout Posts: 1,739 Member
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    what do you call fake spagetti?


    an Impasta!
  • muadeeb
    muadeeb Posts: 91
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    Did you know that sex is considered a misdemeanor........the more I miss da meaner I get!!

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