Ladies - Would you date someone who is divorced?

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  • Gwen7121
    Gwen7121 Posts: 126 Member
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    I married "until death do us part" too...and tried for 20 years to ignore the emotional, verbal and occasionally physical abuse. Yeah. When the violence kept escalating (slamming on brakes on freeway, throwing plates of food, spitting on the floor, the counter, etc., threatening to get a gun because he was mad at our teenager...the name calling...I could go on) and he was doing it in front of our younger child so that law enforcement had to get involved, it kind of gave me the wake up call that I do NOT have to live this way and teach my children that this behavior is normal. Living with that kind of abuse is NOT God's punishment for choosing the wrong spouse.

    I'm really curious what story he will tell his future dates. He insists he's a "nice guy." Whatever. If whomever he dates is in his life and has in impact on my kids', I will do my best to get along with her. And good luck to her.

    Will anyone want to date me? They'd be crazy not to. I'm a catch.

    YES!!! I wonder what my abusive, alcoholic ex will tell his future girlfriends, too! Sometimes I think I should warn all women about him!! It sounds like you went through a lot of the same kind of abuse I went through, but luckily I didn't have any children with my ex. And most of the time, I think I'm quite the catch, too!! I'm sure you're awesome, because I know I am, divorced and all!! :)

    I'm still friends with my ex in-laws so I actually got to hear a couple of things that he told other people. I think the best one that my alcoholic, cheating, abusive ex told was that I cheated on him, and gave him HIV, so that they would let him move in (the sympathy vote). Went a step further and said none of his family would have anything to do with him because of the HIV, and he couldn't afford the meds. My ex SIL heard about it, hunted down the girl and told her the the whole truth of the matter. Her brother took care of that situation.

    I had a good laugh though. :)
  • rossi02
    rossi02 Posts: 549 Member
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    In my early 20s, I could see how that would have made me a little cautious about dating someone. Mainly because back then I had my fairytale idea of what marriage was supposed to be like and how it would be when you met "the one". Now in my 30s, if I was back in the dating world (hopefully that never happens), I really wouldn't see it as a red flag or a big deal. More life experience can change your perspective on things.
  • GB333
    GB333 Posts: 261 Member
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    Curious to your opinion on this one. It seems to be the elephant in the room when it comes to dating.

    I did. And I married him. :)
  • picassoadagio
    picassoadagio Posts: 407 Member
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    Would depend on why he's divorced. If he's divorced because of differences or something else, yes I'd date him... but if it's because of adultery, no.
  • Laura8603
    Laura8603 Posts: 590 Member
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    Yes I would. I'm single and in my 40's. Most people my age who are dating have been married before. I like to think their "starter" marriages helped prepare them to be better spounses when they marry again!! : )
  • mes1119
    mes1119 Posts: 1,082 Member
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    My boyfriend is divorced and we live together now... I think it depends on the situation though. My guy's ex cheated on him with three different guys before they called it quits... There were no children involved either which helps... she is long gone and out of his life.... oh and she got a baby with her new guy anyways.


    And to those that don't believe in divorce, I find it hard to believe that you would stay with someone that would repeatedly cheat on your or abuse you because you said "til death"
  • Johnece
    Johnece Posts: 7
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    I did and now we've been married for 34 years, so I think it worked out well for me!
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,829 Member
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    If I were single, sure, why not? I mean, what's the difference in somebody who is divorced and let's say, somebody who has a child from a previous relationship? Or was in a very serious long term relationship with somebody before me? Everybody has a past.
  • seehawkmomma
    seehawkmomma Posts: 815
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    I would date a man who has been divorced but as long as he wasnt bitter.

    Its hard to date anyone who is bitter
  • masigirl
    masigirl Posts: 16
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    I would have no problem with it. I divorced my ex cause he treated me like crap and now he treats his girlfriends so good. I think men and woman both learn from their mistakes. Divorce has made my ex a better man!!
  • karinaes
    karinaes Posts: 570 Member
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    i dated someone who has been divorced (i was 21 & he 28 at the time) and it was perfectly fine with me
    i'm just about 24 and currently in a relationship with a 35 year old man who has a 12 year old son (out of wedlock) and i'm perfectly fine with that as well :smile:
    it's all about learning from your mistake as the right above poster said
  • amanda8o
    amanda8o Posts: 352 Member
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    Would definitely depend on why the marriage ended and what kind of relationship he still had with his Ex
  • AnnyaSB
    AnnyaSB Posts: 233 Member
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    Yep. I did and I married him :happy: We have been together for 10 years this year and been married for 5 of those - and everyone said it would never last :heart:

    He divorced his first wife because of her dallyings with other men :noway: He does have kids, but by the time we met and got together they were all grown up and out on their own.
  • DOElston
    DOElston Posts: 102
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    The older one gets, the less likely it will be to find someone who isn't, sad to say.
  • keepcalm77
    keepcalm77 Posts: 1 Member
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    I strongly prefer divorced men over never married. They are house broken already, they know what's it like, the expectations are more realistic.
    It depends on what kind of marriage they had and how it went, everyone has a past.
  • Alicia_Monique
    Alicia_Monique Posts: 338 Member
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    I'm only 22 and I would date somebody who has been divorced.
    ...of course I like older men, so... ;)
  • LOLTrish
    LOLTrish Posts: 37
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    Absolutely. Being divorced is not like having leprosy. Also, being divorced myself I think you relate to one another much better.

    Ditto!
  • CynthiaCollin
    CynthiaCollin Posts: 406 Member
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    In my 20's I would have said no. I wasn`t interested in being with someone who had a "past".... and definitely no if he had kids..... I wanted to start off my life with someone like me....who was never married or had kids....we would do it together....

    But being in my 30's I would have to say yes... the older we get the more baggage we all have, so if you meet the right person, whether they were married or not....well I then say go for it ! Be happy !
  • ojell
    ojell Posts: 749 Member
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    Curious to your opinion on this one. It seems to be the elephant in the room when it comes to dating.

    I haven't read any of the other responses but for ME it depends on how long they've been divorced, their current relationship status with the ex, and a small part of it depends on why they got divorced BUT that's just like any guy who's ever had a previous relationship people. I mean if he's a chronic cheater and never been married, I wouldn't want to be with him either. So, that part doesn't totally matter, but the other stuff does...to ME.
  • elimendoza31
    elimendoza31 Posts: 359 Member
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    No I would not have a problem with dating a man that has been divorced..or a man that has kids.:smile:

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