People who complain they're fat but do nothing about it

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  • MyTime1985
    MyTime1985 Posts: 456 Member
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    Generally I'd say they were just just complaining, but like you said, she was in a gym. So she's not really "doing nothing about it". She's trying but not having much success. Hopefully she figures out something that works for her.

    Now when someone is on the couch with Dorito dust covering their face.. THEY'RE not doing anything about it!

    Exactly!
  • Jenni268
    Jenni268 Posts: 202 Member
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    I used to be like that... complaining about it but not doing anything. After several years of it, my husband looked at me and said, "You know what, I'm done hearing you complain about your weight. If you aren't doing anything to fix it, don't complain about it."

    After two weeks of being mad at him for it :wink: I realized that he was right. That was the start of my lifestyle change. Since then, I've lost about 60 pounds and feel fantastic. I still have more to go, but I'm not looking at it as "losing weight" but as a way of living. Even though a lot of people think that my husband was nasty to say that to me, it was just what I needed to hear.

    That being said, he's my husband. Not a stranger, or even just a friend. We had been married for seven years at that point. He had a platform in my life to be able to say something. He also was aware of what I was or was not doing. I don't think you'll ever get through to someone who isn't extremely close with you.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    biggest pet peeve ever. ugh. get moving or shut up already.
  • Changing__Christina
    Changing__Christina Posts: 247
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    She isn't doing nothing about it. She is at the gym. That is at least a start. Everyone has to figure out their own way to get to their goal. Something has to click for her - not you - to get her to do the rest of the things she needs to do to lose the weight she wants to lose. At least she is up and moving at the gym. That is a heck of a lot better than a lot of people that complain about their weight.
    Generally I'd say they were just just complaining, but like you said, she was in a gym. So she's not really "doing nothing about it". She's trying but not having much success. Hopefully she figures out something that works for her.

    Now when someone is on the couch with Dorito dust covering their face.. THEY'RE not doing anything about it!

    I agree with these. I think she is there, trying to do SOMETHING about it. She will figure out a right fit for herself.
  • nananie2
    nananie2 Posts: 272 Member
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    We're so smart and bright now that we've seen the light...

    I have complained (A LOT!) before I was actually ready to make a change.

    Didn't mean I wasn't bothered by my weight, and I think everybody is entitled to complain about things that annoy them.

    That's why people start threads on MFP. :tongue:
  • downsizinghoss
    downsizinghoss Posts: 1,035 Member
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    The switch has to flip in their head. I spent 10-15 years like that. I was always "just about to start" on losing the weight.
    "Next month is the time! "

    You can't force it, and it doesn't help to get mad at them. It is sad.
    They know what needs to happen. Often it is hard to start because they don't believe they can see it through.

    Often it is a confidence thing even more than a lazy thing.
  • Bonita_Lynne_58
    Bonita_Lynne_58 Posts: 2,845 Member
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    That was me...complained about my weight for years while doing nothing to fix the problem...in fact it got dramatically worse. For me...nothing you or anyone else could have said or done would have motivated me until I was ready to change.
  • Gilbrod
    Gilbrod Posts: 1,216 Member
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    I had someone like that on my friends list. Always b!tched about how his/her weight never went down. I saw them exercising. But then you see their food diary. Donuts, milkshakes, Mcdonalds was on their diary at least 4 times in the week. I would tell em cut that stuff out to maybe two days instead of four or five. I got the "I will be grumpy all day if I don't have X food for the day." But the b!tch and moaning continued. Sometimes, they just want people to say "There there."
  • sma83
    sma83 Posts: 485 Member
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    I was one of those people for years! Theres really nothing you can do to help when people are like that. It has to be something they decide to do on their own and for themselves. All the helpful advise in the world wont make a difference until someone is ready for this journey. At least thats how it was for me. I whined and cried and complained and no matter what encouragment others had for me I always had a reason why I couldnt do it or why it wouldnt work for me. I simply wasnt ready to take the necessary steps yet. Try to just focus on you and one day when she is ready she will make the nedded changes. :flowerforyou:
  • onedayillbeamilf
    onedayillbeamilf Posts: 966 Member
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    I'm one of the fat people who hate veggies. I'm talking I will wait for my daughter to look the other way then throw mine in the trash kind of hate. BUT....I have discovered that if I throw them in the blender to chop them teeny tiny then mix them in with food that tastes good, I will eat them. Maybe you could suggest that to her next time she mentions her hate for that ground grown crapola.
  • LouiseRose92
    LouiseRose92 Posts: 112
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    Now when someone is on the couch with Dorito dust covering their face.. THEY'RE not doing anything about it!

    Am currently sitting on couch with dorito dust... but it's in my calories! :bigsmile:
  • chrishgt4
    chrishgt4 Posts: 1,222 Member
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    Sounds like you offered enough advice to be helpful but not push it. After that it's on her. Some people like to be unhappy about something.

    It seems like every time I see you post something, I disagree. But that's fine, diversity is a good thing. I actually like having people around I disagree with because it starts an internal dialogue for me on why I disagree with what they are saying. From a philosophical standpoint, people I disagree with are essential to my life.

    Although, I feel like I don't agree with you on much, here on the boards, haha, I'll back this up. There are people in this world who are just not happy unless they have something complain about. "I'm only happy when it rains..."

    Would you look at what you've done - made me look at your old posts to see if we had argued about something...lol...randomly I found myself agreeing with most of the comments you made... I'm not sure what that means...
  • amymeenieminymo
    amymeenieminymo Posts: 2,394 Member
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    I try not to judge because at one point in time, almost all of us were at that point. We all at one point were fatter than we wanted to be which is why we are here....if we all did somethng about it the very minute the weight started to come on, none of us would be in the position of needing to lose a lot more than just a couple pounds.

    Sure it sounds easy, eat well and exercise and you'll lose weight. I know this....I've done this. But yet for the last year I have struggled constantly to stick with it to see any real results. Two years ago I was steadily losing weight and I was having great success....but for some reason I am really struggling to get that motivation back. That's great that you've lost 15 and your apparently doing well, but you may come to a time in your life when you're not doing great and you are struggling with something so simple.

    Someone might look at me for the last year and a half and say she's unhappy but she's doing nothing about it. But in reality I argue with myself constantly trying to do better, but overall I keep failing. The mere fact that she was at the gym means she must be doing something.
  • Amberetta82
    Amberetta82 Posts: 153 Member
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    My mom. She does this constantly. Drives me INSANE!! She thinks that if she eats less that she will lose weight. She WONT exercise. Every day she squeezes herself into her two sizes too small jeans. She just sits in her room playing poker online and smoking like a chimney. Yea because that is working soooo well. She doesn't listen to me on anything so I'm to the point of whatever and started to ignore it. Quite negative that one is.

    When I told her that I registered for a 5k she said "you know you have to train for that..." No *kitten*, really?? :grumble:
  • GeneveSparkles
    GeneveSparkles Posts: 283 Member
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    I get what everyone is saying about the fact that she IS doing something, you’re absolutely correct. And I did give her props for getting to the gym. But if you know you’re not doing everything you can to better yourself, then don’t complain about it when you don’t see results. I didn’t ask for her weight-loss stats or asked her how her journey was going, she freely offered it up to me. Maybe it was more the complaining part that frustrates me, people who complain about anything in general annoy me. Complain all you like, just not to me LOL.
  • sassylilmama
    sassylilmama Posts: 1,495 Member
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    My husband is an expert at doing this. Gets upset the kids mention his pot belly. Well after dinner you ate a donut, ice cream, and a bag of combos. If you don't wanna hear it don't eat like that.
  • KRFinLeth
    KRFinLeth Posts: 22
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    Sounds like the kind of person who's only looking for attention. Responding is only part of the game.
  • SnazzyTraveller
    SnazzyTraveller Posts: 458 Member
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    They all (want) to lose significant amounts of weight, but will not go to the gym without a partner (which they rarely have) and will not eat vegetables.

    haha this is interesting... i could never ever go to the gym with a "partner". it would throw me off, and i prob wouldnt get a good workout!
  • lorib75
    lorib75 Posts: 490 Member
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    i dont know why it would frustrate you ... she complained ... you offered your two cents ... she wasnt interested ... move on ... you cant force anything on anyone

    This....
    but I must say, I'm the kind of person who has only lost 5lbs since January...but I've changed my eating habits I just don't exercise like I should. Of course I have Multiple Sclerosis....
  • bhalter
    bhalter Posts: 582 Member
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    I always get annoyed by people like that too. Half the time, they're just wanting someone to go "Oh, you're not fat!!!" to make them feel better. I have a friend who always complains about being fat and she'll plan working out and getting healthy and talk about it a lot, but never does. Or lasts a few days and then says she "can't do it." I'm like...well, then don't complain then.

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