dating event bans fat people

amymeenieminymo

Would you be offended?

I personally would not, because 1. whoever organizes it should be allowed to set whatever stipulations they want, 2. I find nothing wrong with having a personal preference to someone's looks. If someone said to me, I can't date you because you are fat, yes I would be hurt. But I could not blame someone for not approaching me because they aren't attracted to bigger girls, 3. How is this any different than checking the "I prefer slim people" box on yahoo personals? A person's size isn't all there is to them, but physical attraction is very important and some people just aren't attracted to bigger people, just as I am not attracted to slim, smaller guys.

Discuss

http://living.msn.com/love-relationships/the-heart-beat-blog-post?post=b58ed513-8203-44de-8685-81cb0b5c0ddd

spazofthedead

Your assumptions preclude anyone that actually *is* attracted to overweight people. To ban them entirely just seems absurd. If someone doesn't fit your bill, don't check their name off. No need to ban an entire subset of the population. That's like saying "sorry, no one with glasses at this dating event because I don't find them attractive." Odds are good that someone else will.

amymeenieminymo

Well if you are attracted to bigger people and/or doesn't think it makes a difference, it's pretty simple. Don't go to that particular dating event. Between online and in person, there are tons of ways to meet someone. Why would someone get offended by ONE event organized that either doesn't include them because they are overweight, or won't have anyone there that they would be interested in?

I don't see how this is any different than a singles mixers organized at a church. Clearly everyone there will be people involved in the church and have religious beliefs so if you yourself are not religious or you do not want to date someone who is, you probably shouldn't go to this event.

Il_DaniD_lI

It's very offensive, how could it not be? It's rude and tacky.

s1lence

You do have a point that if the "group" has a preference for fit/thin/ whatever then that is their right in which to set the regulations for the meeting. However in doing this you also ban those people that are trying to become fit/thin/whatever that would be able to participate in the activities that those in the group would enjoy and be apart of. If you place a regulation on appearance then you thin out not only the people you don't want but the people that may contribute something that is unexpected and great.

The quote "Never judge a book by its' cover" comes to mind.

And to answer the question yes I do find it offensive to have such a preference. However I agree that there are plenty of other ways in which to find people.

daffodilsoup

It's very offensive, how could it not be? It's rude and tacky.

When I used to use okcupid.com, I could set my options so that it wouldn't even show those outside of my personalized specifications. To me, this is kind of like that, just in "real life".

People who don't like it don't have to go.

Bahet

Well if you are attracted to bigger people and/or doesn't think it makes a difference, it's pretty simple. Don't go to that particular dating event. Between online and in person, there are tons of ways to meet someone. Why would someone get offended by ONE event organized that either doesn't include them because they are overweight, or won't have anyone there that they would be interested in?

I don't see how this is any different than a singles mixers organized at a church. Clearly everyone there will be people involved in the church and have religious beliefs so if you yourself are not religious or you do not want to date someone who is, you probably shouldn't go to this event.

That would only be a good analogy if the church mixer actually banned Muslims, Jews, Baptists, etc. If someone showed up to a church mixer and brought their friend Mohammed Goldweitz do you think the church would turn him away?

Il_DaniD_lI

It's very offensive, how could it not be? It's rude and tacky.

When I used to use okcupid.com, I could set my options so that it wouldn't even show those outside of my personalized specifications. To me, this is kind of like that, just in "real life".

People who don't like it don't have to go.

..That's a way of looking at it suppose....

The question is, is this offensive? and the only answer is yes, absolutely it's offensive. I am not even a "fat" person and I'm offended at how ignorant people in this world can be.

spade117

I don't find it offensive, but I don't find anything offensive.

daffodilsoup

It's very offensive, how could it not be? It's rude and tacky.

When I used to use okcupid.com, I could set my options so that it wouldn't even show those outside of my personalized specifications. To me, this is kind of like that, just in "real life".

People who don't like it don't have to go.

..That's a way of looking at it suppose....

The question is, is this offensive? and the only answer is yes, absolutely it's offensive. I am not even a "fat" person and I'm offended at how ignorant people in this world can be.

.

MoreBean13

I have no problem with events that allow douchey people to meet one another. I hope they all find love and pair off at such events, weeding them out of the general population of single people.

jcr85

Not offensive at all to me... but look its being filmed for a reality tv show would you expect anything less.

hiker282

meh...

jsapninz

I don't think it's offensive.

Being overweight is a choice.

I don't respect people aren't taking care of their bodies, this includes by doing drugs or staying overweight or anything that is destructive, and I certainly wouldn't want to date someone who is.

secretlobster

M'eh, it's no different than having a speed dating event for BBW and the men who love them. And they do exist. You don't have to be offended that you don't fit in everywhere.

vanishingirl77

I find everything offensive...but not this for some reason. I mean, other than calling someone who is a size 10 fat. That's offensive.:mad:

meshashesha2012

i dont find it offensive in the least. what i die find offensive is some people getting their panties in a bunch to find out that not every one is attracted to them physically.


not sure how this is any different than women who only want to date men who are taller than them or people who only date x ethnic group. you like what you like and you shouldnt have to be called shallow or a douche because you're not willing to let anyone, regardless of your physical attraction to them, be able to have sex with you

milzu

Of course its offensive. Not to mention it would preclude over 60 per cent of the population who are overweight. For a single person serious about finding 'the one' that's a whole lot of people they have automatically excluded, based on something that can be changed.

Having said that, I wouldn't go for a fat guy. Just my personal preference. And yes, I am superficial. And vain. And a whole lot of other things that would probably stop a gorgeous fat man from wanting to date me ;oP

Il_DaniD_lI

M'eh, it's no different than having a speed dating event for BBW and the men who love them. And they do exist. You don't have to be offended that you don't fit in everywhere.

I think it's quite different as BBW is more like a fetish. I'm sure they allow "fat" men to participate in this.

Sarah_Wins

There will always be disgusting people. I agree with morebean, let them pair up, get the f* out of the dating pool to be miserably married and leave the awesome people to enjoy ourselves

clydethecat

this is stupid, but the people going to the event have the same wants and needs and are attracted to this event because of that. its not offensive. to each there own.

LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo

I agree that its offensive & insulting while at the same time its very shallow & immature that people would just basing their date on their size. I've had those bad experiences in the past when I was still big & believe me it destroyed my self-esteem & my whole being. I know we have different preferences but you don't have to ban the entire population just because you're not attracted to them. You can instead tell them that "I think you look fine but you're just not my type" .

People need to be more tactful when addressing somebody that they don't like.

meshashesha2012

M'eh, it's no different than having a speed dating event for BBW and the men who love them. And they do exist. You don't have to be offended that you don't fit in everywhere.

I think it's quite different as BBW is more like a fetish. I'm sure they allow "fat" men to participate in this.

so why is someone liking BBW a fetish?? people who like larger bodies are now akin to perverts or sexual freaks? :noway:

meshashesha2012

I agree that its offensive & insulting while at the same time its very shallow & immature that people would just basing their date on their size. I've had those bad experiences in the past when I was still big & believe me it destroyed my self-esteem & my whole being. I know we have different preferences but you don't have to ban the entire population just because you're not attracted to them. You can instead tell them that "I think you look fine but you're just not my type" .

People need to be more tactful when addressing somebody that they don't like.

so those people should pay $40 to get in and then be told sorry but you're not my type?

christine24t

Who is to judge who is fat? Am I considered fat?

zaithyr

I wouldn't go to a dating event anyway, but if I wanted to I probably would find it offensive honestly. I mean, what if it were an event saying that certain races aren't allowed to attend? People are shallow and put way too much emphasis on looking perfect. Just because someone is slim doesn't mean they are necessarily good personality-wise and I think people would be missing out on the opportunity to see that sterotypes can be wrong.

And by the way, the comment about being overweight is a choice- that's not always true. There are different medical conditions and factors that can contribute to a person's overall weight and for some people it's next to impossible to become "skinny" by most people's standards. Some of the kindest most respectable people I know have been plus sized.

LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo

so those people should pay $40 to get in and then be told sorry but you're not my type?

Personally I wouldn't mind if I pay $40 & be told that I don't fit on their ideal type of woman because there will be always people out there who will prefer bigger girls over the thinner ones. However to say things like "I don't like you because you are fat" in someone's face is really offensive & may cause major downfall to someone's self-esteem.

TheFunBun

M'eh, it's no different than having a speed dating event for BBW and the men who love them. And they do exist. You don't have to be offended that you don't fit in everywhere.

I think it's quite different as BBW is more like a fetish. I'm sure they allow "fat" men to participate in this.

so why is someone liking BBW a fetish?? people who like larger bodies are now akin to perverts or sexual freaks? :noway:

Oh man! I can explain this one! I got the explanation after wondering how a person can be a fetish when the word implies inanimate objects. Anyways, if a man is sexually attracted to you and you are a bbw, that's not the fetish. BUT, if the man is sexually attracted to you because of the fat that makes you a bbw, that's when it becomes a fetish. Same thing for ethnicity fetishes, or milf things. It's about the person being sexually obsessed with that one -thing-, not the person, that makes it a fetish.

A man who likes it when women wear pantyhose is just a man who likes the look of pantyhose. A man who goes buck wild at the PANTYHOSE is the fetishist.

Il_DaniD_lI

M'eh, it's no different than having a speed dating event for BBW and the men who love them. And they do exist. You don't have to be offended that you don't fit in everywhere.

I think it's quite different as BBW is more like a fetish. I'm sure they allow "fat" men to participate in this.

so why is someone liking BBW a fetish?? people who like larger bodies are now akin to perverts or sexual freaks? :noway:

I think you're confused about the word "fetish". There is nothing perverted or freaky about it.

sleepytexan

Well if you are attracted to bigger people and/or doesn't think it makes a difference, it's pretty simple. Don't go to that particular dating event. Between online and in person, there are tons of ways to meet someone. Why would someone get offended by ONE event organized that either doesn't include them because they are overweight, or won't have anyone there that they would be interested in?

I don't see how this is any different than a singles mixers organized at a church. Clearly everyone there will be people involved in the church and have religious beliefs so if you yourself are not religious or you do not want to date someone who is, you probably shouldn't go to this event.

That would only be a good analogy if the church mixer actually banned Muslims, Jews, Baptists, etc. If someone showed up to a church mixer and brought their friend Mohammed Goldweitz do you think the church would turn him away?

I would ban Mohammed Goldweitz. He is so rude!

TheFunBun

Dammit, I forgot to add my opinion.

I find it "offensive", but I don't think it's wrong. It is dumb, crass, and they may as well ban races, religions, heights, acne, and people who like jeggings and crocs. If I were thin (Which I'm not) I still wouldn't go to it, because it announced to the world that it's a tacky event.

I don't find anything wrong with the concept of people not being attracted to my sexy fat body, though. It's mostly just, "Really? Did they have to make that specification?" kind of offended.