Dating someone different... did it change your type?

beccyleigh

I always dated the fair hair blued eyed tall men & then went through a phase of dating asian guys, well I was living in asia at the time. I met & married my husband who is a thai, long haired, tattooed, buddhist cave man 11 year ago & couldn't have found a better man.

Anyone who restricts their chances of finding happiness due to physical requirements might just end up dissapointed. A mans height or eye colour will not determine his personilty traits.

Roadie2000

See, I'm sort of a country boy turned city boy, now that I gots me a real job. These days I'd just rather pay somebody else to change my oil, and I just assume stay in a hotel with a hot tub and a fireplace than go camping most of the time.

But I feel it's less about the type and more about the person. I never understood the whole "type" thing. If someone only goes for one type of person I feel bad for them because that's a little closed minded.

dreamingchild

Please take my mistakes and learn from them. I'm not saying that ALL country boys are like this. But it's almost the norm down there (also depending on the location and type of crowds you hang out with) You can even read my wall page....I was desperately 100% in love with this man only to find out he was a monster. He changed me and my ways of thinking....so don't change or lose yourself for anyone.....be who you are...keep that close to you.....

This is insulting! I guess I could say something along the lines of well I dated a NYC dude and he did horrible things to me so watch out...that's the norm up there in the big city. I appreciate that you at heart just want to pass along a warning to the original poster but what you said wasn't a warning...it was a huge insult to many people.

bleacheblonde

I've never had a "type"...I tend to steer clear of country boys, but that is probably because I grew up on a farm and went to HS in a rural area and I just can't get down with the whole hick mentality anymore. And I'm not saying everybody who lives on a farm are hicks...I know a lot of farmers who are not hicks and a lot of guys that live in the city (only 100,000 people but the biggest city around here) who drive trucks and wear camo and act like they were raised in a cave. It's a personality thing, not a region thing. Plus I can't stand country music. I also will not date wannabe-rapper-thugs. So I have non-types, lol. But only those 2.

I've dated a choir nerd, a couple of shy sensitive guys, one of which was in a punk band and the other of which was obsessed with poker...and both of them were obsessed with their cars. I mean OBSESSED (for awhile I was tending to attract motorheads, not sure why, although I do like cars). I've also dated guys that are shorter than me, and one that was 15 years older than me that was a "reformed" bad boy (he was into raves and illegal substances back in the day). I go by how I feel when I'm with someone, not by how they look or their job or their past or their family.

My fiance blows the whole "type" thing right out of the water. When I first met him, I sized him up by appearance and assumed he was about 20 years old and was a typical man's-man, probably into basketball. I couldn't have been more wrong!! He was 29, and he's a total science, math, and history nerd. He loves animals. And he HATES basketball And does dishes and laundry. I found me a winner!

saustin201

My "type" is about 6 feet tall with dark hair. I've only dated guys that look like that. When I was in college I took a course on child development. Our "types" we're attracted to is settled in our brains by the time we're about 3 years old. We don't know our type then, but your desired look is set.

saustin201

Hey....I just got out of an extremely HORRIBLE relationship with my BF who is from Alabama......I'm a NYC girl......Born and raised the Italian-American way.

My ex loves nascar, hunting, fishing, mud riding, 4x4's, dirt roads, moon shine, whiskey.....

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE .....I'm only saying this because I care, watch to see if he drinks...and HOW MUCH he drinks. My ex is clearly an alcoholic yet won't admit it. His friends and family even says he's an alcoholic. He was also a drug addict.....I never knew til I did a background check on him. Also, see if he has somewhat of an edcuation. My ex dropped out of HS.....you see where I'm getting with this??

I LOVE country boys too and want to so desperately move back down South...because that's where my heart is. I don't like living in NYC, but I have no business being down south because all of my family lives up here.

Please take my mistakes and learn from them. I'm not saying that ALL country boys are like this. But it's almost the norm down there (also depending on the location and type of crowds you hang out with) You can even read my wall page....I was desperately 100% in love with this man only to find out he was a monster. He changed me and my ways of thinking....so don't change or lose yourself for anyone.....be who you are...keep that close to you.....

Ignorant post!

So country boys only live in the South? How about Nebraska, North Dakota, etc...? My country boy was raised in North Dakota and South Dakota, has a master's from Boston University, works as a manager at IBM and treats me like a queen and he doesn't drink at all.

Where does my guy of 20 years (married for 12.5) fit into your little small-minded world? You sound very young.

bleacheblonde

I have, in the past, dated the following (among others):

* Uber geek from Palau who honestly looked like he could pose for a Buddha statue

* Devout Christian man almost 5" shorter and 50 pounds heavier than I am (I actually was married to him)

* Stereotypical all-American army man (only blonde ever - blonde men are usually icky to me)

* Trust fund playboy (briefly, and he had more hair on his back than on his chest)

* Drug addict ex-carnie (my son's biological father)

I think the only kind of guy that I've never dated was someone significantly taller than myself (I'm 5'10"). I think I need to add that to my bucket list.

I'm 5'11" and I had mostly dated shorter guys until I met my fiance who is 6'4"...and while I'm not into height discrimination, I have to admit that it is really NICE to be to wear sexy heels and still be shorter than my man! It makes me feel less self-conscious because people tend to stare when you're a lot taller than the guy.

RyLaneB

What I haven't dated:

Biker
Cop or fireman (fantasy!)
Sugar daddy

the fantasy isn't all it's cracked up to be . . . trust me

Also ^^this^^ massive massive MASSIVE let down.

I disagree! I am married to a cop who is also an EMT...Sure I have eaten dinner alone when the pager has gone off, sure he gets stuck at work late when some moron earns themselves a trip to jail, yes he works our birthdays, anniversaries, and the occasional Christmas...BUT, he is an amazing man who works 12 hour shifts and comes home to be an amazing dad and husband, he loves being able to help people in both jobs, and... he is pretty hot in that uniform.

Phoenix1401

Small town hicks and country men are a HUGE turn off for me because they're country I grew up around them they're down to earth and fun yet they seem the same to me. I like college educated goal seeking men its hard finding that in "These parts" of Texas lol

Ocarina

I've definitely dated the gamut so to speak.

I've dated the overweight guy with moobs that confirmed that I can't be attracted to that sadly He was also very mentally off, including his family. Kind of a sad mental case jock person that wasn't attractive at all. Thankfully we never got very far LOL.

I also have dated the A-HOLE. A football jock that complained and yelled A LOT. He was the most manipulative, emotionally cruel, and rude person I've ever met. He also did drugs and was just gross!

Another one I dated was a very sucessful kid that was decent looking from about my wealthy background... was in pharmacy school, liked the same friends I liked, treated me like a queen, and also was going somewhere with himself. We didn't work out because it was long distance and he felt stressed out by the relationship + homework. I appreciate being with him as short as it was because it made me realize I could be treated right.

That's where I noticed my husband. He's an Italian geek, never went to college, came from a poor background, is shorter then me, a bit overweight (So was I at the time) and played A LOT of video games. I wouldn't of second guessed dating him except he was completely different. He treated me like absolute royalty and we could strike a conversation, he let me on his cell phone plan since I couldn't get on a monthly contract without really knowing me, and he took me to work every morning with out a second guess. He was just authentically nice and untainted so to speak and I feel so at peace with my life and he also offers stability. He never went to school but wants to and has amazing work ethic. Also he has let me basically catapult my life and go to school and do what I want to do. I have 0 complaints about him and also love his family! Win-win for me.

NCTravellingGirl

I thought I had a type but as I've aged have learned that it's really about chemistry. There have been so many times I thought I'd like someone based on a type only to realize it just wasn't a good fit, whether due to timing or situation, who knows? I prefer to just see what it feels like for each individual and not make decisions on the front end. With that philosophy, I've dated guys with HS diplomas to Masters Degrees, guys from 5'7" up to 6'4", chest hair or not (haha), etc... that perhaps didn't fit my original ideal but brought something special that opened my eyes.

My ONLY absolute deal breaker is if he's a scUM fan...(That's University of Michigan for those not into college/ sports)... that I can't tolerate and can't imagine I'd change that type, haha.... couldn't have a house divided... GO BUCKEYES!!

NYChick84

Hey....I just got out of an extremely HORRIBLE relationship with my BF who is from Alabama......I'm a NYC girl......Born and raised the Italian-American way.

My ex loves nascar, hunting, fishing, mud riding, 4x4's, dirt roads, moon shine, whiskey.....

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE .....I'm only saying this because I care, watch to see if he drinks...and HOW MUCH he drinks. My ex is clearly an alcoholic yet won't admit it. His friends and family even says he's an alcoholic. He was also a drug addict.....I never knew til I did a background check on him. Also, see if he has somewhat of an edcuation. My ex dropped out of HS.....you see where I'm getting with this??

I LOVE country boys too and want to so desperately move back down South...because that's where my heart is. I don't like living in NYC, but I have no business being down south because all of my family lives up here.

Please take my mistakes and learn from them. I'm not saying that ALL country boys are like this. But it's almost the norm down there (also depending on the location and type of crowds you hang out with) You can even read my wall page....I was desperately 100% in love with this man only to find out he was a monster. He changed me and my ways of thinking....so don't change or lose yourself for anyone.....be who you are...keep that close to you.....

Thanks for generalizing every "country boy" into alcoholism. Wow...just WOW

Notice...I didn't say ALL country men are alcoholics.....I said it's more of the norm for guys to drink their beers, whiskey and moon shine...or maybe it was just to the people I was exposed to....I'm a NY'er....I make my own observations with what is presented in front of me. I wasn't born and raised in the south....you can't hold that against me. Granted, I met some really wonderful people too....people that have their lives in order. I guess I was just tainted by one really bad apple.

r1ghtpath

You have been introduced to a new type of man .. one you like .. I say more possibilities!! lol

I know after my exhusband who I DON'T WANT TO DATE .. lol. What qualities I will never have in a man again.

THIS!!! after my ex i know exactly what i DO NOT want in a guy!

that said, i am very much so attracted to country boys. always have been! LOVE men in uniform, and guys that loves the outdoors!!!

i think it's great that you are enjoying his differences :-)

NYChick84

My apologies if I offended anyone...It wasn't my intentions....I made an observation from what was presented to me. I didn't say ALL men from the south (or from any other part of the country) was bad...it's who he surrounded me with that became the norm...hindsight is 20/20......it was HIS life...not the life of ALL people.

So, my apologies go out to everyone if you feel offended by my post.

r1ghtpath

See, I'm sort of a country boy turned city boy, now that I gots me a real job. These days I'd just rather pay somebody else to change my oil, and I just assume stay in a hotel with a hot tub and a fireplace than go camping most of the time.

But I feel it's less about the type and more about the person. I never understood the whole "type" thing. If someone only goes for one type of person I feel bad for them because that's a little closed minded.

i have no problems with the hotel and hot tub, but not all the time. and i would prefer a guy that likes camping over the 5 star hotel. the reason being, because i want to have FUN while i'm camping!!! it's easy to have fun at a resort or spa or nice hotel. it's easy being waited on! it's not so easy living outside, building fires and cooking over them. you get sleep deprived and dirty.

when i was 18 i decided that if i could live in a tent, in the woods with a guy for a week or more then my bet was i could weather any marital storm. my ex and i didn't spend a week in a tent. we spent a week on a cruise ship........ in my young mind i assumed that since we survived a week on a Royal Caribbean ship we would be FINE dealing with the ups and downs of marriage..........

tent, cruise ship, totally NOT the same. i'm back to my "being able to live in a tent, in the woods, for a week" LOL!!!!!

r1ghtpath

My apologies if I offended anyone...It wasn't my intentions....I made an observation from what was presented to me. I didn't say ALL men from the south (or from any other part of the country) was bad...it's who he surrounded me with that became the norm...hindsight is 20/20......it was HIS life...not the life of ALL people.

So, my apologies go out to everyone if you feel offended by my post.

my favorite country boys, are from WI and IL. ;-)

MzRawkqueen

I've dated rich boys and poorer ones.
Guys who were 300lbs and those who even weighed less than me.
Preps and stoners; rockers and rollers.
Even a couple dads.

All the guys I have been interested in, weren't intersted in me and vice versa. Finding that special chemistry is really tough. (It eludes me, actually.)

Looking by 'type' will limit your chance to encounter that fabulous chemistry.

For instance, I never thought I'd date a red head - not generally attracted to them, but was engaged to him for a bit. We broke up eventually, but it sure as hell wasn't because of the colour of his hair!

PittShkr

I'll date anyone as long as he knows what to do ...If you know what I mean???

odusgolp

I'll date anyone as long as he knows what to do ...If you know what I mean???

You're talking about sex and wieners, aren't you.