Women dating younger men

fuhrmeister

My hasband is 10 years older than me and we work great together. He is 42 and I'll be 32 soon, my stepson is 19. It is kind of a strange family. I may have grandkids at the same time I'm having my own kids but it works for us.

However, my last serious BF before my husband was 3.5 years younger than I was and we had trouble with maturity issues.

I think you should date whoever you like and after you get to know the person decide if the age difference matters.

rml_16

I think this all goes to the fundamental biological urge to procreate that tends to invade our modern lives. A younger woman can have babies with an older man, but an older woman will have a much more difficult time having babies, so biologically-speaking it doesn't make sense for an older woman to be with a younger man.

But outside of that, if both people are over 18 and OK with the relationship, do what makes you happy.

Dannib55

I say go for it. It only becomes creepy if your kids are his age. I was recently hit on by a guy who had a daughter tthat was my age. He was not bad looking, but I could not get that he has a duaghter my age out of my mind.

sammniamii

If you are looking for long term company, you might run into issue, just because of generational things between the two of you, but if you are just dating (IE: enjoying each other's company but maybe not looking too far ahead of the game) than I say go for it. Why not...

I've dated gone as far as 8 years younger and 20+ older. I finally married one 4 years younger, but he has alot of "old time" values so it mostly evens out.

mlc825

OK I really need to weigh in on this because this is the story of my current situation! I'm recently divorced and although I'm going to be 40 soon, it's seems that younger men (30ish) are attracted to me most. At first it was a HUGE compliment, then it truly raised some concerns. Sometimes dating younger men presents it's challenges, but if you take it all in stride and appreciate the fact that younger men are attracted to you right now, I think you should ride the wave, because the times going to come when you won't have that. The greatest love of my mom's life was 15 years her junior and she simply couldn't get over the age difference. He didn't care. He loved her and wanted to marry her and I was all for it, but it never happened and to this day (over 20 years later), my mom still regrets it. She reminds me that physical age doesn't matter. Sometimes you'll meet someone who has a very old soul. If you can connect mentally, physically and emotionally, you have nothing to lose! Enjoy your life and don't worry about what anyone thinks or says - it's your life! Live it to the fullest and be HAPPY!

Bentley2718

I'd date one for the ego boost, but seriously, how much would you really have in common with someone who was born when you were in high school?

I once had a relationship with a man who was well out of high school when I was born. We had a lot in common, and a lot of fun together. The relationship never became "serious" because he did not think that someone in their late 20s should "have to" take care of a spouse who was much older (in this case, by 35 years), nor did he think it was fair to set me up to be a widow at a young age, but we remain friends.

While I wouldn't go so far as to say "age is just a number," as long as your both legal, I don't see the harm in giving it a try. I'll throw in that my husband is 5 years younger than I, and was a "mere" 22 when we met.

kimad

I think it depends what you are looking for in a relationship.
When I was 22, I met a 41 year old, at first it seemed to work well, but it really didn't We didn't want the same things whatsoever -- except it was easy for him to tell a naive 22 year old he did.

So I say who cares about age if your desires match.

ETA: LOL so this time I found someone more my age and that still didn't work, so maybe I need to go younger this time :P

mmarshall425

I, personally, think it's disgusting, but that's just my opinion. You should do whatever will make you happy.

The only question I would have is this (and one of my main reasons for feeling the way I do)... what happens when this 24 year old boy decides he wants to have BIOLOGICAL children and because you're past your child bearing years you are unable to fulfill that?
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WOW - disgusting? That is a pretty strong opinion.

I agree that having children is an issue that should be discussed early in the relationship. Although, I was only 29 when I met my husband, I was unable to have anymore children without having a surgery. This fact really concerend me and I offered to have the surgery so I could conceive but my husband assured me that he didn't want any children of his own and it never become an issue. He is happy in hisr ole of step-dad to my kids.

bigdawg025

Little back story first: my ex-husband who is my age, 40, is getting remarried. His fiancee is 23 years old. I admit it bugged me at first, but what he does in his personal life is none of my concern, so I have moved past that. I just want her to be good to my children.

But it got me thinking that when a man dates a much younger woman, it usually isn't considered a big deal as long as she's legal. But when a woman dates a younger man, she's a cougar, milf, or whatever unflattering name she is called.

Ironically, there is a man who is 16 years my junior that I am attracted to, but I haven't acted on those feelings because of the age difference. Am I making a mistake here?

So what is your opinion of women dating younger men or men dating older women? Any experiences or advice you would like to share? :flowerforyou:

I, personally, think it's disgusting, but that's just my opinion. You should do whatever will make you happy.

The only question I would have is this (and one of my main reasons for feeling the way I do)... what happens when this 24 year old boy decides he wants to have BIOLOGICAL children and because you're past your child bearing years you are unable to fulfill that?

Because EVERYONE wants to have children of course..............

I didn't say everyone does... it was a "what if" kind of thing. I understand not EVERYONE needs or wants to have children. I get that. But if you're 24 and she's 40 he doesn't even get a fighting chance (at least not without serious risks)

kappyblu

Grow up, dude.

you had to know this is coming.. thats why he grew up.. shes 23!

THANK YOU.. ILL BE HERE ALL WEEK!

Thanks for that! :laugh:

quietHiker

It is interesting how in society, women dating younger seems to be more scrutinized than men dating younger.

I myself am 20 years younger than my boyfriend. He's in his 40s and I'm in my 20s...and people may say, "Wow, what do you have in common?!" but I couldn't be happier. He's become my best friend, and has really shown me how to live life I've dated guys my own age, but there's just something special about him We're at 3 years strong, and I see us continuing on for many, many more!

exercisesucks

Generally speaking, men ages 18 to 30 date older women because it is easier to have sex with them. Younger women look to older men for security and status, so they usually shun the younger guys for the more stable older men.

Older women are not looking for security or status. They don't have the self esteem or confidence issues that younger women have and they have learned what they want sexually and are not worried about other peoples opinions regarding recreational sex. They usually have children or a divorce under their belt and are looking to get out and have some fun.

tashjs21

I think this all goes to the fundamental biological urge to procreate that tends to invade our modern lives. A younger woman can have babies with an older man, but an older woman will have a much more difficult time having babies, so biologically-speaking it doesn't make sense for an older woman to be with a younger man.

But outside of that, if both people are over 18 and OK with the relationship, do what makes you happy.

That's a very good point. It depends on what his wants are as far as children.

My husband's ex was much older than him and he ended the relationship (mainly because she was bat **** crazy) but also because she had teenage children so he knew he would never have his own kids if he stayed with her.

We met and there is 6 years difference between us but here we are 1 kid later and trying for baby #2. So it really does come down to the individual and what their future wants are.:flowerforyou:

thebaconbeast

If you think it'll really make you happy then go for it.

bigdawg025

I, personally, think it's disgusting, but that's just my opinion. You should do whatever will make you happy.

The only question I would have is this (and one of my main reasons for feeling the way I do)... what happens when this 24 year old boy decides he wants to have BIOLOGICAL children and because you're past your child bearing years you are unable to fulfill that?

WOW - disgusting? That is a pretty strong opinion.

I agree that having children is an issue that should be discussed early in the relationship. Although, I was only 29 when I met my husband, I was unable to have anymore children without having a surgery. This fact really concerend me and I offered to have the surgery so I could conceive but my husband assured me that he didn't want any children of his own and it never become an issue. He is happy in hisr ole of step-dad to my kids.
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It is a strong opinion... "cougars" in the true sense of the word creep me out. I'm talking like 15-20 years in age difference and the woman being at least 40. I'm not saying a few years difference is a bad thing... and remember it's just my opinion and my own personal preference. I'm not judging anyone who wants that... it's simply not for me. I think it's far more insignificant say if the people involved are older (late 30s... 40s... even 50s) and both have a significant amount of life experience.

charkastner

I think you should do what your heart tells you to do. This "younger man" could be your soulmate. I just married the best man who could have come into my life. He is my perfect match, he is also 10 1/2 years younger than me. I admit at first, it worried me. I worried, what if he decides he wants to be with someone his own age? what if he decides that he really does want to have kids of his own? Well that's just a chance you have to take with any relationship, regardless of age. Had I not taken that chance..... well I don't even really want to think about that. 4 years later, we are a strong couple. You only live once. I say go for it, if it doesn't work out, than whatever, but if it does.....think of how wonderful it can be. And who cares what they call you, live your life the way you want to, not how anyone else thinks you should. Hope to hear soon how it turns out. Good luck girl. .

Lotte34

My fella is mentally 12 does this count?

I don't think age should matter

DarthCeltic

My fella is mentally 12 does this count?

I don't think age should matter

its more a routine thing for every male to be into 12 year old things.. potty humor.. comic books..

SF2514

Little back story first: my ex-husband who is my age, 40, is getting remarried. His fiancee is 23 years old. I admit it bugged me at first, but what he does in his personal life is none of my concern, so I have moved past that. I just want her to be good to my children.

But it got me thinking that when a man dates a much younger woman, it usually isn't considered a big deal as long as she's legal. But when a woman dates a younger man, she's a cougar, milf, or whatever unflattering name she is called.

Ironically, there is a man who is 16 years my junior that I am attracted to, but I haven't acted on those feelings because of the age difference. Am I making a mistake here?

So what is your opinion of women dating younger men or men dating older women? Any experiences or advice you would like to share? :flowerforyou:

I, personally, think it's disgusting, but that's just my opinion. You should do whatever will make you happy.

The only question I would have is this (and one of my main reasons for feeling the way I do)... what happens when this 24 year old boy decides he wants to have BIOLOGICAL children and because you're past your child bearing years you are unable to fulfill that?

Because EVERYONE wants to have children of course..............

I didn't say everyone does... it was a "what if" kind of thing. I understand not EVERYONE needs or wants to have children. I get that. But if you're 24 and she's 40 he doesn't even get a fighting chance (at least not without serious risks)

I actually have a friend who married a woman 15 years older than him (I think its about 15 years, I'm not 100% but atleast 11 years older). He did want kids of his own. Both her kids from a previous marriage were 18 +. She had her tubes tied after the last. They talked about having it reversed to try for their own but in the end decided to adopt. They couldn't be happier and I am completely happy for them. I don't think the biological aspect was as important to him as wanting to have a family with the woman he loved .

kappyblu

Little back story first: my ex-husband who is my age, 40, is getting remarried. His fiancee is 23 years old. I admit it bugged me at first, but what he does in his personal life is none of my concern, so I have moved past that. I just want her to be good to my children.

But it got me thinking that when a man dates a much younger woman, it usually isn't considered a big deal as long as she's legal. But when a woman dates a younger man, she's a cougar, milf, or whatever unflattering name she is called.

Ironically, there is a man who is 16 years my junior that I am attracted to, but I haven't acted on those feelings because of the age difference. Am I making a mistake here?

So what is your opinion of women dating younger men or men dating older women? Any experiences or advice you would like to share? :flowerforyou:

I, personally, think it's disgusting, but that's just my opinion. You should do whatever will make you happy.

The only question I would have is this (and one of my main reasons for feeling the way I do)... what happens when this 24 year old boy decides he wants to have BIOLOGICAL children and because you're past your child bearing years you are unable to fulfill that?

Because EVERYONE wants to have children of course..............

I didn't say everyone does... it was a "what if" kind of thing. I understand not EVERYONE needs or wants to have children. I get that. But if you're 24 and she's 40 he doesn't even get a fighting chance (at least not without serious risks)

Believe me, I have thought about this. I cannot have more children because I have had a tubal, so if we did get together, I would make this clear from the beginning. But there are plenty of women who have children in their 40s.