Things you shouldn't say to someone "on a diet?"

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  • bpetlock
    bpetlock Posts: 109
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    I almost forgot about this but after my first pregnancy I was trying to lose weight and was watching my calories. My mother-in-law said to me "Don't you just want to be happy?" as if eating healthy didn't make me happy. I was like "Yes and that's why I'm trying to lose weight."
  • sabbers1982
    sabbers1982 Posts: 16
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    I've only been eating healthily and exercising for just over a month and I've had my mum stay over twice in that time. We sometimes get some shopping together and she will buy cakes and things. Get them out and offer me some and then retract it and say "ooh I'm sorry I forgot you're on a diet," the first few times I didn't mind but she keeps on doing it, like playing dumb about my dieting. One time she asked me if I wanted lemon merrange (sp?) pie and thank god I was like no I hate the stuff. But the way she does it like I have no self restraint, like I'm incapable of saying no to food. Which is funny because I don't even like deserts that much.

    Other times I see people raising their eyebrows or thinking just get on with it, if I measure or weigh out my food. Like I'm doing it just to be fussy.
  • Hope502012
    Hope502012 Posts: 98 Member
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    I've always found over the years that I've been criticised for being "overweight" or too thin. Hopefully this time I'll get it right! The important thing is to be happy with yourself. I usually quote Thumper from Bambi "If you can't say nuttin' nice, don't say nuttin' at all".....:happy:
  • Hope502012
    Hope502012 Posts: 98 Member
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    Ignore the people who think you are fussy. Who cares what they think. You will feel the benefits and be happy for it.:smile:
  • cps4646
    cps4646 Posts: 4 Member
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    My favorite is when they say you can have 1 bite it won't kill you! Yes it might because I can't stop at 1 bite! Not supportive at all!
  • Briko3
    Briko3 Posts: 267 Member
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    "One cupcake is not going to hurt you."

    I hear that and I think. NO. I don't WANT the darn cupcake! I'm trying to be good! lol.

    *empathizes with you*

    Haha...just tell them their cupcake looks like crap and you didn't want to hurt their feelings.
  • sabbers1982
    sabbers1982 Posts: 16
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    "One cupcake is not going to hurt you."

    I hear that and I think. NO. I don't WANT the darn cupcake! I'm trying to be good! lol.

    *empathizes with you*

    Haha...just tell them their cupcake looks like crap and you didn't want to hurt their feelings.

    Haha I was thinking the same thing.
  • LeeshaNichole
    LeeshaNichole Posts: 179 Member
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    Also-I hate when people ask "how is the diet going?" or "is th diet working?" ugghhh! Ohh and also my mom always asks"why are you trying to loose weight?" Umm cause I'm FAT!!!!

    Meaning of the word diet according to dictionary.com:
    4. the foods eaten, as by a particular person or group: The native diet consists of fish and fruit.
    5. food or feed habitually eaten or provided: The rabbits were fed a diet of carrots and lettuce.

    So, yes you are on a diet. Just not one that lasts 4 months and after that you're back to your old ways. You're changing your unhealthy diet into a healthy one.

    ---
    I'm surprised by the hate everyone describes towards people who, in their own way, are trying to help. Be glad that you're mother is worried about your health. Both for not eating enough and eating too much. Be glad that people who have problems with dieting and still have weight issues find you important enough to give you some tips they've learned from experience. People might be trying to help you in way that doesn't work for you, but in almost all of these posts I hear someone trying to help.

    If you think about it you should be happy that people care enough to try and help you. But explain to them how they can help, or that you'd rather not discuss your diet with them.
    You are assuming these people are trying to be nice and help and also that my mom is worried about my health-this is not the case. The people were asking in a snide way cause they don't think I can do it-They are asking "how is the diet going?" In other words have you given up yet. And when they ask "is the diet working?" They look at me up and down, and basically saying-You still look fat. It is not in a caring way, it is rude and it hurts my feelings. Also, my mom could give a crap about me. And when she asks " why are you trying to lose weight?" It is always followed by is the doctor making you loose weight or is Josh (husband) cause she doesn't think I could possibly do it on my own. My mother wishes I was never born.

    Soo Please, please for the love of Pete DO NOT assume!! Also, remember that in my post (the part you did not include) I wrote I lost my baby-people could have a little more sympathy and support me instead of being rude and hurting my feeling-only after a month of losing my baby. Thank you!
  • burtonhl
    burtonhl Posts: 57
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    I have a huge addiction to Pepsi and that is one thing that I am not ready to give up yet.

    As soon as people see me with a Pepsi, apparently they are entitled to tell me that it is full of sugar and all the damage it will do to me. No shi#$^ sherlock! If I could quit cold turkey I would, but I know it wouldn't last! Baby steps for me.
  • smeklc
    smeklc Posts: 94 Member
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    bump for later
  • dentedearmuffs1
    dentedearmuffs1 Posts: 34
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    My ex-boyfriend was really hot, 6'2" with a great physique. My parents met him and my dad later asked me if I get jealous or paranoid of him with other girls since I was overweight. And then he said he wished I would lose my weight. That one hurt because it felt like he thought my boyfriend was out of my league.
  • manhn1
    manhn1 Posts: 137 Member
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    I love the people who act like maintenance is harder than losing the weight in the first place. In the breakroom of my second job, some of us were talking about my weight loss (I had just run my first race - a 10K two days earlier) & a lady who's an attention *kitten* was saying that & I started laughing. She glared at me & I said that if maintaining your weight is harder than losing weight, than you're not doing it right.

    Well, I think maintenance *is* harder than losing the weight. Losing the weight you get the positive reinforcement via the lower number on the scale, the occasional compliment, or trying on smaller clothes. With maintenance, you get comments like "You're still on a diet" or "You're too skinny" or "Eat this--you don't need to diet anymore!"

    It's not like I can't understand why someone would think losing weight would be harder--since losing weight is hard. But it seems reasonable to hold either opinion.

    Friends have been basically fine. Work is harder--particularly my boss who is young and fit, and seems to always want to give me some chocolate bar or slice of pizza or can of pop.

    Family is tougher, I have one aunt who always seem in pain when she sees me. I know a lot of people think I'm skinny--they say it enough times in front of me. I'm "normal" in terms of my BMI. I wouldn't mind gaining more muscle, but I like how I currently look and I like cardio, so I'm in no huge rush.

    While I notice a lot of posters have negative reactions to people who have their own weight issues, I tend to be more irritable to "naturally skinny" people. I hate comments like "Why run in a stuffy gym when you can run outdoors in nature?" Uhm, because I hate bugs and I get bored watching grass. "You can eat everything you want, just in moderation." I cannot eat Oreos in moderation, so I'd rather not have one, thanks anyway. I just find it smug and annoying.
  • Karenzky
    Karenzky Posts: 34 Member
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    i hate it when someone ask me,
    s:so are you still on a diet?
    me: yes
    s: is it working?so how much did you lose?
    me: 20lbs
    s: really?

    argh!
  • MaretL
    MaretL Posts: 50 Member
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    "One cupcake is not going to hurt you."

    That's the one for me too! or "everyone HAS to have some sweet stuff sometimes" - Yes fine, only let ME decide when and what it is for me!!

    And the other attitude what really annoys me is when you tell someone that you're trying to lose weight and they ask how long have you done it and how much you've lost and then it turns into a big competition (you know, that big boasting style of tone) : "I was dieting last year and I lost 30 lbs with one month" - I'm glad for you but at the same time it is not a competition, I prefer losing it reasonably without starving myself and I HAVE time - for the rest of my life actually!!! :D
  • EmpathyBot
    EmpathyBot Posts: 78 Member
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    Another one of my friends said to me "You don't need to run and workout to lose weight, just walk. Why do the extra work?"

    Meanwhile she keeps gaining, then losing, then gaining...
  • itgeekwoman
    itgeekwoman Posts: 804 Member
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    One guys said to me today.. if you lose much more weight you'll be nothing.

    I'm 5'3" 177. I have more than a little to lose!
  • HollywoodDJ
    HollywoodDJ Posts: 296
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    About a month or two into me being on MFP and losing weight my husband ....HUSBAND ...(who obviously thought he was entitled) said to me when I was eating supper - - (can't even remember what it was) said to me,"I THOUGHT YOU WERE WATCHING WHAT YOU ATE??????"


    and I said to him, "THAT'S RIGHT...I AM WATCHING WHAT I EAT...NOT YOU........ME....OK???"

    Haven't heard another word like that from him~ So there~

    This is also the same guy who in the first week or two was practically shoving ice cream and Swiss Rolls in my face and then turning them away from me and putting them in his mouth going..."YUMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmm"

    JERK!!!:explode:

    But .....this is also the same guy.....who after I lost my first 20 lbs got me a "CONGRATULATIONS" card and beautiful arrangements of flowers and told me he was so proud of me!~ So.....he wasn't supportive at first but he's come around and I have taught him not to be the food police now~ LOL!


    MEN....can't live with them, can't live without them~ =):drinker: hehehehe
  • LeslePG
    LeslePG Posts: 105 Member
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    People who say "Why are you trying to lose weight? You look fine". Well, I still have about 10 pounds of baby weight I want to get rid of from 6 years ago! And what I really want to say is "Have you seen me naked? Not pretty right now but I'll show you if you think it's your business" :laugh:

    Luckily my husband and I are doing this together with MFP and training with C25K......however, his huge calorie allowance per day really annoys me~ lol!

    Glad we can all encourage each other- keep up the good work, everyone!

    My husband and I are doing this together too and he has a huge number of calories a day also! And he keeps dropping big numbers each week and while I am happy for him I keep teasing him that I am going to inject bacon fat into his celery. LOL and he says "Note to self, Don't eat the celery. GOt it !"
  • LeslePG
    LeslePG Posts: 105 Member
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    So glad you're going thru what I am with your hubby~ he texts me every evening on the way home asking "Margaitas? Been a while..." I ge so mad at him and say "you may have the extra calories to drink but I don't! Thanks for being supportive!" And his big numbers.... I totally get that too! Hang in there, we'll be hotties before we know it!
  • Carolyn_79
    Carolyn_79 Posts: 935 Member
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    I've only had a friend comment on my food choice once. She hasn't been very supportive of my weight loss so I think she's just dealing with her own issues.

    I tend to make a point of telling people who are interested that I've managed to lose my weight by not depriving myself of the foods I love. I just have them in moderation.

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