A stranger's harsh words

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  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
    LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo Posts: 3,634 Member
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    My response would have been, "yeah stay away so you don't catch my FAT and I don't have to worry about catching your STUPID!"

    Haha I love this!
  • irishcanadianwoman
    irishcanadianwoman Posts: 147
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    I am so sorry that happened to you but it is clear that man is an example of "sorry". Your wrote " I'm a "shrinking healthily" 226 pound woman with feelings, damn it!" Keep repeating that. You are on a path to self love and care. Don't let anyone derail your journey. I am glad you shared your pain and hurt. We can help contradict those harsh words with loving words to allow you to recover and continue on your journey. This journey is full of potholes and a ..holes. It is hard to avoid them all since they are so unexpected. Glad you shared instead of feeding your hurt. Continued healing and success.

    This is brilliant!!!
    I would have wanted to say something hurtful back. "Maybe I am fat, but in a few months I will be slim and healthy. But in a few months you will still be an *kitten*!"
    Rising above is the best and most gracious response.
    Best wishes on your journey.
  • tabulator32
    tabulator32 Posts: 701 Member
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    He was a freakin' stumblin' drunk. How much credence do you give his critique?!

    Walk up behind him and kick his knees out from under him and then say "Wow! You were right! You DO need to stay away from me!"
  • barnacle1225
    barnacle1225 Posts: 3
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    All I can think after reading this is your life could be a lot worse, you could be that poor drunken idiot's girlfriend!!! If that's how he acts out in public just imagine what he's like in the privacy of his own home and how he must treat her. I'm so sorry that happened to you.
  • heddylyn
    heddylyn Posts: 173 Member
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    My heart broke a little when I read your post. I am so sorry. Brushing it off is easier said than done, even when the hurtful words came from a worthless stranger that you will probably never see again. I too have been there. It happened over 5 years ago and I still think about it from time to time. It was right after I had my first child. I was 100 pounds heavier than I am today. Having my son was motivation for me to take my life back, be healthy and set a good example for my child. My husband and I decided to go to the park for a long walk. I stopped to go to the bathroom. As I was washing my hands I felt this woman behind me just staring. I turned around to grab a towel to dry my hands and made eye contact with her. She said "I can't BELIEVE that you exercise. I mean, your hips - they are SO BIG!!!" And she even used hand gestures to demonstrate how massively enormous my *kitten* was. I literally felt like I had been punched in the gut. All I could think to say was "that was an incredibly rude thing to say." I came out of the bathroom shaking and couldn't even tell my husband what happened until that night when we were in bed and I couldn't go to sleep. Anyway, my boot camp instructor and mentor always says "don't ever forget where you came from." He said he sees it all the time. People that come to him that are overweight with little self esteem and start seeing results. He said sometimes people get in the best shape of their lives and something changes in them. They become arrogant, start judging others, etc. Just remember that you have the same heart no matter what size you are. Stay true to yourself and treat others with respect and you will be fine. Good luck on your fitness journey! And please know that you're not alone!
  • GAbutterfly82
    GAbutterfly82 Posts: 10 Member
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    My response would have been, "Well, I can lose this weight, but I'm afraid you'll always have a small d**k. Sorry about that, honey." But then, I'm not sure I'd want to stoop to his level.
  • Heaven71
    Heaven71 Posts: 706 Member
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    I'm normally quite a strong person and don't really let anyone who says anything affect me, but on Friday, that all changed..!

    I was out with friends for a long brunch (my "cheat" meal for the month) and some random (albeit drunk) man was walking around with his girlfriend and said to her 'let's get away from here because that woman is fat".. in ear shot!!! I asked him what he said and he repeated it, looking directly at me, "what, you are really fat"... my only response was that I couldn't help it if he was an "a'hole"... but the damage was done, I was devastated, still am. I held myself together, until I got in a taxi and then bawled my eyes out for an hour until I fell asleep... how does he not know what affect this could have on someone, what if they weren't as strong as I am??

    How can anyone be that cruel..! It is clearly up to you what you think, but why would you say something so offensive to someone your walking past, whether you know them or not..!

    I used to be "less cuddly" but through a year of ups and downs and stress and tragedy, I've gained around 60 pounds... I started work on finding myself again at the beginning of June and shed 9 of them so far. My journey's only just beginning but people like that don't help... although I woke up the next morning and went for a 5km walk in searing heat - so I guess, sucks to be him (probably cuddling a toilet bowl somewhere) because what he did, made me get up the next morning to ensure I got my exercise in..! I'm a "shrinking healthily" 226 pound woman with feelings, damn it!

    Instant A'hole, just add alcohol. Use it as fuel as you did the next morning. He has a miserable life, therefore he must make others miserable to justify his misery.

    You are doing more to better yourself than he ever will, just take solace in the fact that you are a better person and you would never hurt someone like that.

    Great Job on the 5k walk, you are doing it!
  • miracole
    miracole Posts: 492 Member
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    unfortunately words have power, no matter who the ignorant *kitten* is who spouts them. Your response was totally merited, and I say good for you for taking those words and using them to motivate you to get your exercise in. You may be fat but you can change that, it'll be a lot harder for that prick to become a decent human being.
  • skcornett
    skcornett Posts: 169 Member
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    Years ago, I traveled quite a bit for work. One evening, I was flying in a really small plane - think 10 seats. Anyway, the man next to me didn't want me to sit in that seat. He literally didn't want the fat chick to be on the exit row next to him. Hello? I could have easily opened that door if necessary - put a little weight behind it, you know? Anyway, he was just rude and an *kitten*.

    When we arrived in South Bend, he was still spitting and fuming. But Karma is a glorious thing. I picked up the last rental car available that night, and there were no cabs available. My parting words? "Doesn't pay to be an *kitten*, does it?" Not mature, but dang that felt good.

    Moral of the story: karma can be your friend. You keep doing what you are doing. And figure he'll keep doing what he's doing and someone's gonna take a shot at him.

    Hold your head up and smile - you are beautiful.
  • fatcheeksme
    fatcheeksme Posts: 24 Member
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    I'm so sorry that happened to you! It's unfortunate how people behave so carelessly towards other peoples feelings. I've had things said to me before in the past and I know it hurts but as far as I'm concerned he's irrelevant and can kiss your bum and You can continue to exercise and be healthy :) while he works toward alcohol poisoning
  • TLEIGH33777
    TLEIGH33777 Posts: 93 Member
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    Whos drunk @ brunch? That says alot about him right there. I would have taken his words lightly. He has issues.....
  • fatcheeksme
    fatcheeksme Posts: 24 Member
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    I'm so sorry that happened to you! It's unfortunate how people behave so carelessly towards other peoples feelings. I've had things said to me before in the past and I know it hurts but aartar as I'm concerned he's irrelevant and can kiss your bum and You can continue to exercise and be healthy :) while he works toward alcohol poisoning
  • Enigmatica
    Enigmatica Posts: 879 Member
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    What a microdikkk. I'd assume he's extremely insecure and tries to elevate his own ego by stomping on others. Karma will catch up to him.

    Years ago a nasty neighbor called me a FAT *kitten* when we got into an argument on the street due to him letting his dog loose and it attacking my dog and others. I snapped back that my FAT *kitten* could lose weight but his DUMB *kitten* could never gain smarts.

    Now he doesn't recognize me because I've lost so much weight, and his brain is shot from doing so many drugs.

    Glad I'm me!
  • jlreser
    jlreser Posts: 64 Member
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    I'd look at it like this....tough love time.

    While strangers can be complete ****s at times, they sometimes say what people around you will not have the guts to say. While he hurt your feelings at the time (which I'm sure hurt very much), what was the end result? He made you want to get up and exercise you're butt off the very next morning which is AWESOME! I'm not saying he was justified in what he said, but him saying that made you take a check and really work the next day.

    You took a set-back and turned it into a positive! THAT IS AWESOME! Next time, don't cry over an *kitten*'s remarks, save that sobbing energy and turn it into a success for you! GOOD JOB!!! (we're experiencing record temps here in GA and I ain't going outside for ANYTHING! :D
  • WaxMama
    WaxMama Posts: 369 Member
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    Wow, I'm really jealous of this guys girlfriend- what a catch she has found!!!!

    You hit it right on the mark, he's an *kitten* and probably always will be! People can be so incredibly cruel. Brush it off and move on, sweetie!
  • Neecy_Pooh
    Neecy_Pooh Posts: 122
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    There is one difference between you two. You can lose that extra weight; as for him, people usually cannot change the fact of being an *kitten*. Physiques change, personalities don't. So when you are skinny and hot, he will still be an *kitten*!! Hehehe
  • shutterbug282
    shutterbug282 Posts: 588 Member
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    That's awful!
    You can lose that weight, but he'll always be a *kitten*.
  • MandiS80
    MandiS80 Posts: 127 Member
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    There will always be someone out there that will be rude about anything. They don't realize the damage they cause and it is very hurtful. But you are on the right path, you are making changes for the better and he will still be an *kitten*.
    I was called fat yesterday... it hurt a little... but I laughed it off because it came from a skin and bone crack addict.
  • Pinky1147
    Pinky1147 Posts: 105
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    People are such a-holes!! They never realize what impact words have on people.

    Next time look at him and seriously say "Wow! Fat? That's all you got? Aren't you original?" Then something witty like what other folks are saying on here. lol
  • Laylasmom77
    Laylasmom77 Posts: 42 Member
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    People that put other people down have issues of their own. He's probably an alcoholic and trying to cope with something his life. Not making excuses for him but it's true. You're better than me because I probably would have threw a drink on him!

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