(some of the) American guys...

dreamingchild

I haven't dated in a long time but i think the guy is cheap. And he complains too much!

Jersey_Devil

all I know is you are hot. If I were on a date with you I'd just hand you my credit card and tell you to buy anything you want.

coloradocami

"and PLEASE don't get offended" :laugh:

braign

I don't think this is a purely American phenomenon at all, people all over the world can be excessively frugal (don't get me started on some British men lol)

And trust me do NOT get involved. If a guy is cheap/frugal and you are not, it's setting up the stage for arguments about everything from food, leisure time, to how you live your entire life. Not worth it.

It's one thing if you both feel the need to tighten your belts, so to speak, in order to save towards a common goal, but it's entirely another to be with a guy who moans about every single penny spent. It's a difference in attitudes that'll never reach a common ground or compromise.

jackpotclown

this should end well \m/

EmCarroll1990

Meh, not all guys are like this. When I was dating, the guy paid first. But seeing as I don't make a *kitten* ton of money, I'd suggest a place that wasn't too expensive, so when I offered to pay (if my offer was accepted) I could actually pay for it.

Don't just assume all American men are like that, cheap guys are everywhere as are true gentlemen.

CountryBoy65

I do not think this is going to end well...so I will stick around and watch!~

Jodi, I really appreciate you you always pay for the female entertainment and confectioners sugar.

Since I can't call it what it really is anymore....

You are awesome.

Now, gimme my change.

MalibuBeth

Since he's essentially only paying for himself because, as you said you pay for yourself, maybe he's not as well off as you think. I have met MANY american men that always pay for a woman, and don't say a word. Him choosing to stay home when you said he is into you.... maybe he just doesn't have the $$. It can be expensive to go out all the time, and some people like to spend a night relaxing at home, you could have offered to join, bring a movie and bottle of wine or something.

Natashaa1991

i don't mind being spoiled i am not a feminist or stand for woman's rights or whatever, i do let the guy pay on a date but i don't do it for too long, i am always more comfortable when i pay for myself.
and this is not just one guy, there is a certain stereotype about american guys (again, this is not meant to offend anyone, i am a serbian and most of you will immediately think, terrorist)
i don't know what to say because a guy made me feel like i demanded from him to spend too much.

gsager

this is not exactly fitness related but whatever, i am gonna post it anyways because there's so many of you here from US.
ok i am not saying all of the guys from us are like this, but most of those i met are really cheap!

so i like this guy and we went out for dinner and then the next time we went for drinks (to an expensive place, but i didn't ask for him to pay, i was buying drinks for him as well).
i don't exactly expect from the guy to pay for me, i am not like that, but this guy kept complaining about every dollar he spent, and seemed very frustrated that as a girl, i don't have to spend that much.. like, you don't pay for the entrance to a club because you are a girl and looked at me as if i was supposed to apologize for that.
we went to a cheaper place next time and the guy kept complaining! not only him, a lot of americans that i met are like this, and most of them are well-off...
so the guy texted me and said that he doesn't wanna see me tonight because he doesn't wanna spend money (i'm sure it's that, he showed me that he liked me).

as i said i am always paying for myself (except for the first time but he insisted) but wth? Did anyone have similar problem?? and what did you do, i don't even know what i'm supposed to say..

and PLEASE don't get offended, this is by no means meant to offend anyone.

I think you're just meeting the wrong guys. Those that you're talking about are whiners.

MaraDiaz

He probably wants you to drive over to his house, using your gas, and give him some.

neverstray

I am really in deep *kitten* with the IRS and the State due to some stuff that went down a couple of years ago. I am so strapped in debt that paying $3 for a beer is ridiculous. So, yes, I am one of those guys right now. I count every penny I have. I have to. But, it's not because I am cheap, it's because I have to.

I don't always think guys like that are cheap, I think sometimes guys are responsible. They have $x amount to play with and when it's gone, it's gone.

People think I have money, if you see me around, it appears that things are fine. But, I can barely put enough gas in my car to get to work. So, it's tough. One date, and I'm broke all week and unable to eat or put gas in my car. I mean, it's that bad. People that live around here, it's very expensive. Everything is so expensive. It's overlooked a lot. And, women think we're cheap. It really pisses me off. It's why I'm not dating. Why bother? I don't want to be called cheap because I'm not. I am what they call, the working poor. In a couple of months, I will literally be working only to survive, no more. It's horrible.

Grimmerick

This is definitely not a stereotype that fits most american men, hell my fiance and I had been dating for two weeks and he bought me a damn bose radio on HIS birthday. Not to mention paying for absolutely everything and getting offended(not meanly) if I tried to. My french roommate however was a very frugal guy, but he was a student as well

Annette_rose

I have kind of run into that with dating also. I have paid for some dinners, drinks, etc, especially when they hint about being broke and then I feel guilty for costing them any money. Ugh. And, I don't make much money myself at all as a single mom. I did go out with one though who wanted to buy me whatever I wanted in KC and that was nice, but I am not used to that kind of generosity. He ended up buying me a pair of Lucky jeans and I was floored that the price tag on them was $100. Never paid that much for a pair of jeans. I have to admit that I enjoy being with a man who would like to pamper me.

smiley245

Lol. I feel your pain, I dated a guy like this for a short while. although I didn't mind paying for stuff (or my share) some of the time, the complaining and never wanting to go anywhere, cause it cost money, drove me nuts. I only stuck around as long as I did in hopes he would learn to stfu....and the sex was good.
I walked away before I ended up choking him

xLexa

My hubby is the only American I have dated, and we have been together almost 10 years and I STILL argue with him about him paying for everything. He says we are a team.

I'm not working/earning because I'm at home with the kids so he agrees that I AM working and saving us a fortune on childcare!

From the start he was always a gentleman and had his hand in his wallet but I too am a pay my own way kind of girl and if he bought one round of drinks I bought the next, if he paid for dinner one time Id pay the next. Never once did he complain about spending too much money.

I'm with the others who have said you either met a tight wad or a guy with financial problems who doesn't want to admit it. If you like him and feel comfortable bring it up, if you couldn't care less, let him go on his merry whiney way :P

Natashaa1991

Since he's essentially only paying for himself because, as you said you pay for yourself, maybe he's not as well off as you think. I have met MANY american men that always pay for a woman, and don't say a word. Him choosing to stay home when you said he is into you.... maybe he just doesn't have the $$. It can be expensive to go out all the time, and some people like to spend a night relaxing at home, you could have offered to join, bring a movie and bottle of wine or something.

he is, he wasn't bragging or anything but it's not hard to guess.

_SpeshK_

I think a good place to throw this out there would be in the Group "Single Peeps!"
Loads of good advice on dating, etc.

Also, my 2 cents...he's a douche to complain about spending $
ESPECIALLY if you are paying your fair share.
I mean if he doesn't like spending money he doesn't need to be dating.

MaraDiaz

I am really in deep *kitten* with the IRS and the State due to some stuff that went down a couple of years ago. I am so strapped in debt that paying $3 for a beer is ridiculous. So, yes, I am one of those guys right now. I count every penny I have. I have to. But, it's not because I am cheap, it's because I have to.

I don't always think guys like that are cheap, I think sometimes guys are responsible. They have $x amount to play with and when it's gone, it's gone.

People think I have money, if you see me around, it appears that things are fine. But, I can barely put enough gas in my car to get to work. So, it's tough. One date, and I'm broke all week and unable to eat or put gas in my car. I mean, it's that bad. People that live around here, it's very expensive. Everything is so expensive. It's overlooked a lot. And, women think we're cheap. It really pisses me off. It's why I'm not dating. Why bother? I don't want to be called cheap because I'm not. I am what they call, the working poor. In a couple of months, I will literally be working only to survive, no more. It's horrible.

That's a rough situation. I'd prefer someone were upfront with me about something like that. I'd certainly be if I were going to date right now, I can't afford extras most of the time, either, and it's not like that's something you can really hide, or not for long.

BigDaddyBRC

Simple soltion....date me.