Who should pay when dating? men/women/both
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The men! Once again, they are paying for the pleasure of my company. Plus I'm in the south now. I have plenty of my own money but I'd rather let the guy take care of paying. Less headaches for me and he can feel good about providing for me.
*sigh* :noway:0 -
I'm married and haven't dated much at all in my life. (Dated 3 guys, married 2 of them)
But the man must pay if he wants to date me.
I would NEVER ask a man out.
If a man who asked me out asked me to pay or go Dutch I would pay but I would never see him again.0 -
He has always paid, I always ask if I should he never lets me. I usually leave the tip.0
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Im a person who belongs in the 50s and 60s and I prefer to pay the way as a gentleman, although, most girls I know are very independent and pride themselfs on paying their way making it akward for chaps like me lol
I would be happy to let the guy pay every time if that made him feel better. I don't pride myself on paying my way, I just think it is fair, and my bf agrees.0 -
Same here but now it doesn't matter cause it comes out the same account.When my husband and I were dating, we did both. I think he paid more than I did, but I paid sometimes as well. Now that we're married, we decide based on who has more money at the time.0 -
My boyfriend and I usually have it who ever offers to go out pays. He works and I don't so he usually pays more often or not, but when I get enough money I take him out.
I think this should maybe be applied to male/female relationships as well. The person who invites, pays. I wouldn't take someone out and then expect them to pay for it. That's just plain rude, ladies.0 -
=P
I'm a lesbian too - trapped in a man's body.......:drinker:It's so weird that a lot of women claim they don't like old-fashioned rules, but then they turn around and want the man to pay for everything... which this came about because in the past women were not allowed to own money and were property of their fathers, so the man HAD to pay. In this day and age, I think it's most appropriate to respect women's rights and go dutch, or trade off paying for dates, to create a solid and even footing for the remainder of the relationship.
I guess I will never have to worry about this particular problem though, since I'm a lesbian.
But I still pay when I invite.0 -
I pay for the most part.0
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Men should pay if it's clearly a date and it's known that they're romantically interested, and the relationship is budding. If the relationship is longterm and committed, then it should be 75/25% or something to that extent, unless the woman has a much bigger paycheck. And if longterm, I'd hope there'd be a mature discussion about it, leading to a mutual understanding. As with any relationship, communication is paramount. If it's a friendship, ambiguous or not, it should be separate, unless it's a special occasion.
Nice answer.
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The men! Once again, they are paying for the pleasure of my company. Plus I'm in the south now. I have plenty of my own money but I'd rather let the guy take care of paying. Less headaches for me and he can feel good about providing for me.
Seriously though, another one of these threads?!
/sigh!!
Honestly for me...if a woman absolutely fights me for the check, I get the straight up indication that she does NOT want me to look at our night out as a 'date'. If that's the case...she can pay for whatever she likes, and enjoy whatever the next guy takes her out to do. Once we're serious about dating (assuming we're not living together)...I'll still pay, unless circumstances dictate that I can't for whatever reason...in which case I'll allow her to pay lol, just so we can still go if she really wants to (I won't allow my circumstances to keep us home, or keep her from having an enjoyable time out). My last girlfriend and I ran into this situation during my recovery from surgery on my arm. I lost my job because of it, and a couple of nasty circumstances took a big chunk out of my savings. In our economy I didn't know when I'd be working again...and with kids to support, spending money on going out wasn't happening. At that point she took up that responsibility. I didn't like it, but it made her happy and that was obviously more important to me than what I liked or didn't.
If we're living together...then we've obviously come to a level of commitment that transcends 'mine' and 'yours'...and it's all 'ours'. I still prefer to be the one to get the check (habit maybe?), but I also know that our money is ours (this is whether she's working or not)...and that level of sharing...not to mention her contribution to our overall support (whether financially or not), is important.0 -
In the beginning of the relationship (meaning the first couple of dates) he should pay and definitely refuse your offer to pay. But later on, as you get to know each other more, the lady should offer to pay for a date or pay for part of it./split it - and the man can refuse if he wants - but the gesture should be made.0
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the person who asked the other for the date.
me and my boyfriend have been dating for 3 1/2 years and we take turns paying. Also it depends on our financial situations. I am looking for work at the moment so lately he's been paying for everything which makes me feel like I'm mooching... but I know as soon as I have money I will take him out and spend money on him.0 -
Well, after dealing with women who thinks that I owe them something for the pleasure of their company, I have set a few rules. Before I go into it though, let me say that I usually prefer to pay for the date
First off, I insist on paying. I am a gentleman. However, if you're one of the girls who're too full of themselves of think that you're doing me a favor by going out with me, I will probably just leave you after paying MY share of the bill. You can get a cab
To the girls saying that "if he asked me out, he should pay". I have a feeling that most of these girls don't ask out alot of guys and if they do, the date doesn't head out to a restaurant or a theater, if you know what I mean. But who am I to judge
If the girl INSISTS on paying the bill, I usually take it as a sign that the date didn't go the way she woulda liked and we should just pay our dues and call it an evening
Now, if we've been dating for a bit, its always my treat. No matter what stage the relationship is at. I'm working towards having a strong relationship and depending on the stage of relationship, in my mind, you're already my woman and I'm your man and I love taking care of the women in my life because I know they take care of me too.
Ladies, a tip from a guy. Please offer to pay your share. Its common courtesy. Most standup guys will refuse to take your money but its always nice to know that they didn't just paid for a date.0 -
I do think that it's funny when women who are totally feminists in other ways (we deserve equal pay, shouldn't be expected to be stay-at-home moms and do all cooking/cleaning, etc) are like "men should ALWAYS pay".
I had a friend who was working and earning a decent pay, while her boyfriend was in school and not being financially supported by his family or anything and he ALWAYS paid. It, honestly, made me think less of her because she never offered to pay (and I know he was the type of guy who paid because he thought that was the polite thing to do, not because he would be offended otherwise).
I think the guy should pay the first few times, and then you should switch (unless one person makes a lot more than the other).0 -
Ladies, a tip from a guy. Please offer to pay your share. Its common courtesy. Most standup guys will refuse to take your money but its always nice to know that they didn't just paid for a date.
THIS.0 -
If I ask, I pay. If I am asked...well then they pay ;-)0
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Never should matter based on gender.
Whoever asks pays or makes its clear its 50/500 -
I like going 50/50, but I also want my guy to feel like a gentleman. I'll usually offer and if he refuses, I'll let it go or insist on buying dessert for him later.0
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I like going 50/50, but I also want my guy to feel like a gentleman. I'll usually offer and if he refuses, I'll let it go or insist on buying dessert for him later.
Giving in return is awesome. Buy groceries, cook dinner at his or your home for him. Purchase concert tickets to his favorite band as a surprise date...then let him pay for the food and drinks etc.
See ladies, it's not that we expect monitary compensation...nor do we expect physical compensation. It's that we appreciate who you are, and that you've given us the pleasure of your company. Your efforts to 'return the favor'...without insulting the gift of supporting our outings that we've given you...just makes your company that much more attractive.
Simple, isn't it?0 -
The men! Once again, they are paying for the pleasure of my company. Plus I'm in the south now. I have plenty of my own money but I'd rather let the guy take care of paying. Less headaches for me and he can feel good about providing for me.
Screw your company what happened to equality lol.
If you want men to pay for your company why don't you just go turn tricks on the street.0 -
The men! Once again, they are paying for the pleasure of my company. Plus I'm in the south now. I have plenty of my own money but I'd rather let the guy take care of paying. Less headaches for me and he can feel good about providing for me.
Screw your company what happened to equality lol.
If you want men to pay for your company why don't you just go turn tricks on the street.
That was basically my thought about "oh, he's paying for my company". They have escorts for that.0 -
I think it is all about who invited who.... Don't ask me to go out and expect me to pay for it - if I ask then I will pay!!!0
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Ok I had to answer this one! I think either way is no big deal, before I got married he paid for everything, after marriage, I pay or should I say I'm usually the one with all of our money so I just pay, no big deal.
I was once ask to go out this was from a friend and at t he end of the dinner ended up paying for 7 people. Go figure that out!
One person gave some cash and I ended up putting all other dinners on my card.0 -
My man and I have been dating nine month. When he has the money, he pays. When I have the money, I pay. We both thank the other for paying, and enjoy ourselves in the process. It's simple really.0
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Call me old-fashioned but the men should pay. How can they show they have the ability to support and care for their women if they can't even pick up the tab on the first date?!0
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I like going 50/50, but I also want my guy to feel like a gentleman. I'll usually offer and if he refuses, I'll let it go or insist on buying dessert for him later.
Thats an awesome reply and the best thing to do imo.0 -
The men! Once again, they are paying for the pleasure of my company. Plus I'm in the south now. I have plenty of my own money but I'd rather let the guy take care of paying. Less headaches for me and he can feel good about providing for me.
....
Sorry but I can't afford escort services.0 -
Now how do you afford your rock 'n' roll lifestyle?
Hahaha.. I just don't care to handle the money, silly.0 -
Now how do you afford your rock 'n' roll lifestyle?
Hahaha.. I just don't care to handle the money, silly.
Money is filthy. I don't like handling it either.0 -
Both, unless one invites the other to a place outside the others budget, and then the inviter should pay.0
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