Wedding Costs- Cash Bar or Open Bar?
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Congratulations on your engagement! Remember you are inviting people to celebrate your wedding - you are throwing a party! Pay for the beer and wine. You could have one signature cocktail available for the first hour of the party. Don't use drink tickets - icky tacky.
Good luck!0 -
Congratulations on your engagement!
I get married in 10 days!! It's so close.
We are having an open bar ONLY because my mom is adamant about having one and is paying for it. My fiance and I don't really want any alcohol at our wedding but that's simply because there are too many alcoholics in my family and I'd rather not contribute to that. Plus neither of us are big drinkers. So I say it really depends on your situation.
At the very least I would talk to the bar and see if you can purchase chips at a discounted price to give two to your guests and then anything else they have to pay for. So if you buy 240 chips and drinks are $1.50 each, maybe you pay $300 instead of $360 or something. But keep in mind those chips will likely only be good for certain types of drinks, where we are having our reception the chips are the same for soda/soft drinks, beer and wine but you need a different one for a mixed drink.
As for cutting costs, look for family friends or friends of friends who are in the business or side job you're looking for. My MOH's uncle does tents and chairs and is cutting me a great deal. You can also forgo flowers all together or just have a bouquet for yourself and not the rest of your girls, or just get the girls a single flower that matches your bouquet. Use pocket squares instead of boutonnieres.
Maybe you have some family friends that are good cooks, can cook for that amount of people and would cut you a great deal!
Get a one tier fancy cake (or 3-tier cake with two fake layers) for the cake cutting but have a sheet cake in the back that guests are served from.
Feel free to add me or message me! I'm sure there are a ton of other options that I can't think of off the top of my head.0 -
Weddings with booze that is free will be remembered well even if the guests are drunk enough to forget.
::bigsmile:0 -
Elope!0
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Apologies if this has already been suggested - but if you're going to be buying in bulk from a liquor store, check around to see if some have a buy-back option. For our wedding, we went in and bought a ton of beer/wine/liquor, and anything not opened, the store bought back from us. Perfect solution!
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run off and elope and spend the money you would have spent on a big wedding on a house or a nice vaction just for the two of you.
Congrats!
^^^OMG this! Seriously, do it. We wish we would have taken the cash that my father in law offered us to elope. Dammit.0 -
At my wedding reception we supplied 2 bottles of wine per table (10 people per table) and of course champagne for the champagne toast, then had a cash bar. Just couldn't afford to have an open bar, as much as we would have liked to. I know it sucks going to a wedding with a cash bar, but we paid for the entire wedding out of our own pockets as well. I was only 23, so yeah, it wasn't easy. Congrats by the way!0
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we had beer and wine bar and then it was a cash bar for liquor - the place we got married at had the beer and wine for $2 a person, and u only pay for those who are over 21 so that should knock out some of ur number anyway.
if u have a hobby lobby near you, keep an eye out there, they do half off bridal every so often and u can get things like your guest book adn pen, candle holders, etc.
orientaltrading.com also has some good deals.
print ur own invites, put ur favors together yourself, if u don't mind artificial flowers (there are some that look pretty real) you can even make your own boquets and such (flowers are expensive) my mom did mine - which we also got at hobby lobby when they did half off floral, they have all the stuff there that u need to do it.
what area do u live in?0 -
Our wedding was at a historic site on the top of a mountain and we had to bring in our own liquor so we did wine & and couple of kegs of good beer, the caterer provided the bartender and we were able to take back what was unopened. It worked great.0
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Our wedding we had iced tea, lemonade, cucumber water, coffee, tea, and sparkling cider for toasting - please please please make sure you have options for those who don't imbibe. I'm not a big soda drinker, and often that and water are the only choices.
I've never been to a wedding that required me to pay for my own drinks. You're the one throwing the party, you should be the one footing the bill. If you can't afford an open bar, pare it down to something within your budget.
My sister is getting married next month, and for the drinkers they're serving the classic: red, white, and beer. Makes for some good times! :drinker:0 -
Cut costs by cutting *things* and planning. Don't cut costs by charging your guests. That isn't cutting costs. It's redistributing costs.
so what about if the wedding is a destination wedding? is the bride and groom suppose to pay for their guests airfair and accommodations too? I have no problem making my family and friends pay for their drinks, i'm not going to be responsible for stupid idiots on my day.0 -
I would say to just provide beer and wine, don't even need to have a cash bar, mixed drinks aren't necessary.
I agree, just provide beer and wine and that's it.0 -
Its a hard question to answer for sure but if you look at the overall cost and budget is limited i would maybe suggest 2 drink tickets, i have seen this done in many weddings, i have also seen many where its beer free and everything else you pay for.
That said if you decide to pay for a open bar you will pay for let me know where the reception is ...???
lol
good luck0 -
I didn't read the entire thread, but I've seen it all. At the end of the day it's your wedding and you should do whatever you can afford and what suits you as a couple. If you don't drink then don't host the bar. If your friend/family will take advantage of it - then don't host the bar.
Other ideas:
Sometimes you can get different "packages" with your reception venue
Have a friend play "bartender" with alcohol you bring in
As for my wedding we had unlimited beer/wine
I enjoy weddings where at least the first hour or two (up to dinner) is open for at least beer/wine - while bride/groom are doing pictures and guests are twiddling their thumbs. However I bring cash just in case.0 -
My advice: skimp on everything else and do open bar.
Unless your guests are predominantly Amish and/or Mormon, they will appreciate open bar more than anything else. And people can cope with mediocre food and even bad music if they're enjoying the open bar.
You probably don't have to skimp very much - open bar is not that expensive. Most people spend more on cake and flowers, which is totally ridiculous. Spend $100 on Costco sheet cakes, spend $100 on fake flowers, and buy your guests an open bar.
We did this for our wedding and got great reviews, though we do wish we had gotten a DJ instead of just setting up the Ipod. Our playlist got hijacked midway through the evening and after that point there were no slow songs.0 -
Open bar all the way.....I have a lot of drinker friends/family. We even opted to upgrade the bar, and skimp on other stuff. Check out venues that let you bring your own stuff to try to cut some costs. Sometimes you can even ask the venue to throw in extra stuff as well. We got them to put in Ketel One vodka over their top vodka at no extra charge. It's worth it to ask...and remember that you can always haggle with the places too!0
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Cut costs by cutting *things* and planning. Don't cut costs by charging your guests. That isn't cutting costs. It's redistributing costs.
so what about if the wedding is a destination wedding? is the bride and groom suppose to pay for their guests airfair and accommodations too? I have no problem making my family and friends pay for their drinks, i'm not going to be responsible for stupid idiots on my day.
I personally think that "Destination Weddings" should be banned. It's ludicrous to put that kind of monetary burden on guests. When my husband and I got married we did it in Key West. We were on a learn to sail trip with his ex business partner and his wife. The only people we told was my cousin and his wife. We were by no means inviting them but they decided they wanted to come any way and they paid for their plane tickets, lodging etc. People close to you would feel obligated to book the trip to see you get married regardless if they could afford it and build resentment over it because they felt "forced" to go. Your equating an open bar to a destination wedding is ridiculous. An open bar is a far cry from a "Destination Wedding".
The majority of the people who have posted here have said open bar. In all honesty I've never been to a cash bar wedding. Like someone else said if money is an issue then skimp elsewhere and do an open bar. Sure people will talk about the ceremony but it'll be the reception that guests will remember the most.0 -
It depends on where
Your priorities are.
We're having an open bar, but I'm sure I won't need extravagant flowers.
There are always little ways to cut corners. Make a list of priorities.0 -
My hubby and I got married 12 years ago. We were also on a budget and cut some substantial money by getting married in November which is the month with the least number of marriage licenses issued. Because florists, caterers, bakeries are not doing much wedding business in that month we received huge discounts because they wanted our business. We received a free reception room at a country club, 20% off cake and flowers and wine/beer for the bar. We had a cash bar and our guests received the discount. We also went on a honeymoon and received discounts because we were out of season.
I wanted to get married in October, but it was too expensive. We wouldn't have received any discounts.0 -
Are you really calling guests "stupid idiots"?Cut costs by cutting *things* and planning. Don't cut costs by charging your guests. That isn't cutting costs. It's redistributing costs.
so what about if the wedding is a destination wedding? is the bride and groom suppose to pay for their guests airfair and accommodations too? I have no problem making my family and friends pay for their drinks, i'm not going to be responsible for stupid idiots on my day.
Why not have a destination wedding and invite nobody with that attitude.0 -
First of all, congratulations! I am writing from the UK where a cash bar is not uncommon, but to be honest I have always resented it when faced with it. YES, the wedding costs the bride and groom a lot of money, but it's also very expensive for the guests; most of the weddings I have been to have involved cost of travel to the venue, sometimes staying overnight if it's far from home, clothes, gift, plus stag/hen night costs if applicable - to have free drinks (even just beer and wine, not necessarily everything behind the bar) would have been a nice gesture.
Plus, unless you know lots of other guests, a wedding is not THAT enjoyable as a guest. You are invariably stuck next to someone you don't know, having to have the awkward, "So, how do you know X and Y then?" conversation, plus you have paid a lot for the privilege as well. To pay for your own drinks on top of that would seem like an insult.
If cost is an issue, as others have suggested, I would either revise the guest list/venue/catering or have beer and wine only (just in case there are any piss-takers who would order double shots of spirits all night, just because they could).
Hope all these different opinions haven't confused you further!
Good luck - and have a great day!0 -
going to the wedding it has to be open bar, but i understand the cost part so maybe beer and wine unlimited and the rest they got to pay.0
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We had a wine and beer bar only. No liquor. That saved us a lot of money, and we only budgeted enough for 2 drinks per person. We also handed out champagne for the toast. The total drink bill came to about $500 for 80 people (including bartender's $200 fee), so not bad, and a lot of people ended up not drinking at all so we had leftover wine. If they wanted more than 2 drinks or liquor, they paid for that themselves, but hardly anyone did that.
I'm not a fan of full cash bars at weddings. Have at least 1-2 drinks per person available if you can afford it. Any more than that, and they can pay.
Honestly, we cut a LOT of money out in the flower, cake, dress, and decor budget. We wanted to spend more on food and entertainment for the guests than anything else, and that worked out really well. Everyone had a great time, and we didn't break the bank. If you need to make cuts, cut out the excess or expensive decorations and go with cheaper more crafty stuff. Making sure your guests are well fed and entertained is just good manners. You can do that even on a shoestring budget.0 -
BTW, am I the only person who doesn't know what a toonie bar is?0
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Destination Weddings are a crock.
I thought marriage was the destination.
Anything else is tacky "look at me, its my special day, I'm unique just like every other snowflake" kind of thing.0 -
Congrats!!
If you have to choose, I go for beer/wine. Your guests will thank you.
Nowadays, a cash bar is frowned upon and a drink tickets are a NO NO.
Suggestion from someone who will be married a year next month...skip the expensive floral centerpeices and go for something cheap. We had a beach theme, and did fish bowls with beach sand inside (free from beach) seashells and a white candle in the middle. The shells and candles were from the dollar store.0 -
An open bar is costly and if you have friends like mine, they will suck you dry. My suggestion, have beer and wine and if anyone wants to PURCHASE the hard liquor let it come out of their pockets. You could also try checking out BEVMO they do have wedding packages and I believe they deliver the booze to you all you need is a bartender. That way you can keep in your budget what you want to spend and once your out, your out. Congrats I hope this helps!!!0
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BTW, am I the only person who doesn't know what a toonie bar is?
Heh....toonie refers to the Canadian $2 coin.
OP - I'd suggest trimming your other costs if necessary and going with the open bar. Just wine and beer would be fine too I guess, but definitely not a cash bar.
Congrats by the way
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With my family we had an open bar at a funeral. I do not really care for alcohol ( the taste:sick: ) so I totally understand the cash bar. With my family (father's side) you don't want a wedding with too much free booze because fights break out.0
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IMO, I think a cash bar is tacky. I have never been to a wedding where I had to pay for drinks but that is how it is done where I live. If cash bars a typically an option and that is how it is done where you are then I would say it is fine because your guests wouldn't find it unheard of. Another option could be to just offer beer and wine or maybe rent a venue that allows you to bring in your alcohol to keep your cost lower.0
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