Overweight and obese children!!!

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Replies

  • Kara_xxx
    Kara_xxx Posts: 635 Member

    My best friend is a senior dentist at a dental school and runs a pediatric clinic. She frequently sees children who need SUBSTANTIAL numbers of extractions due to dental caries quite clearly caused by constant eating of sweets and lack of parental supervision with personal hygiene. My friend is NOT allowed to criticise the parents, only to "advise" that constant cola, sweets and not cleaning their teeth before bed might not be a good plan for their dental health. She had an 9 year old girl who needed to have ALL her milk teeth removed in an attempt to ensure that the second set grew through without caries. I think that's despicable and worthy of a referral to social services, never mind a bit of gentle advice.

    My ex-partner's daughter had this - most of her milk teeth filled or removed because they were so rotten. One of the reasons we broke up was his parenting style - if princess didn't want to do anything, such as eat anything other than nuggets and chips, drink anything other than coke, clean her teeth, tidy her toys away - she didn't have to do it. She ate sweets whenever she wanted. He didn't even wake up when she had to have 5 teeth removed and a filling in an ADULT tooth at the age of 11. She developed chronic constipation because her diet was so bad, she always had stomach ache, and that didn't wake him or his ex wife up to improve her diet and get her drinking more water. I couldn't bear it and as a step parent I had very little influence other than making suggestions and offering to help with a healthier lifestyle. Sometimes he would try, but he couldn't bear her being unhappy so would inevitably give in and she'd be back on the crap.

    Ironic isn't it "he couldn't bear her being unhappy"... Her future unhappiness as an obese adult with chronic health problems he'll have on his conscience, because he couldn't deal with a bit of conflict when she was little. I see a lot of this "anything for a quiet life" parenting, of treating children like little adults... and this whole movement of trying to be their 'friend' rather than a parent.
  • MessyLittlePanda
    MessyLittlePanda Posts: 213 Member

    That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

    This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".
  • super_monty
    super_monty Posts: 419 Member
    I saw a massively fat kid on the bus with the massive Mother they went 2 short stops, the kid had a full fat can of coke a huge chocolate bar and a bag of crisps.

    I felt like say to the Mum that's child abuse whats wrong with giving her an apple, a bottle of water and ******* walking you moron.

    You see this kind of stuff everyday now, where I live, the parent are in denial.

    I blame the parents, same excuses, no time, no money, my kid wont eat anything else - all bollocks.

    I can cook a healthy meal for four in the same time as the microwave, it can be about the same price, if you stop giving a kid junk food they will eat anything when they are hungry enough.

    I made sure I did not pass my old bad habits on to my child.
  • castadiva
    castadiva Posts: 2,016 Member

    That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

    This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".

    And in a lot of cases, they do... Children's bodies are growing and changing all the time, and often go through periods where the body is storing resources for a growth spurt. Obviously I'm not talking about major levels of excess weight, but applying adult standards to children's bodies is unwise. In physique, diet, or strenuous exercise, especially weight-lifting type activities.
  • thebigcb
    thebigcb Posts: 2,210 Member
    If I offended it wasn't intentional

    And I know that there are kids that have mdeical problems, issues with eating habits etc, that even with the parnets best help they can do little about.

    But the vast majority or fat kids are fat because of what there parents feed them.
  • super_monty
    super_monty Posts: 419 Member

    That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

    This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".

    There is massive denial I saw two Mothers outside a school going mental because they had been told their kids where obese at 5 years old by the school nurse.

    They where saying their brother and sisters were the same and thats just the way they are built. They miss the point both of the parents were morbidly obese and have passed it on to their children. That chocolate bar or bag of sweets they given them after school everyday is not needed along with the rest of the junk.
  • thebigcb
    thebigcb Posts: 2,210 Member
    Schools dinners gotta be part of the problem as well? They look like absolute rubbish to me ? We don;t have them in Ireland, thankfully
  • Meraid
    Meraid Posts: 148 Member
    I've been overweight my whole life, despite going out to play with friends outside all the time and dancing and playing baseball. When I wanted a snack I would call for my mom and ask. We had fruit every night. We only had ice cream after our baths and the computer didn't really come into play until I was 9. The TV wasn't too big either, unless sailor moon was on. I was really just.. out playing with friends all of the time. I don't know when things went down hill.
  • diadojikohei
    diadojikohei Posts: 732 Member
    I don't just think it is what children are given I think it is the size of the portion too. My cousin's wife gives her 4 and 2 year old the same amount of food as an adult would eat, I couldn't believe it! Then she said as she put the food down, 'Eat it all up and there's ice cream for pudding' , the 2 year old didn't eat it all and wasn't given an ice cream! She had to sit at the table and watch everyone else eat one!
    My cousin and her husband both have PhD's and are in very well paid jobs, they are not stupid people!
    The 4 year old wears my daughter's age 8 dresses.
    It's really difficult to be there and watch this intelligent woman creating eating disorders with 2 lovely children.

    My 4 are skinny and are grazers, smaller meals and snacks of bread, fruit and dairy.

    I also have a child with Asperger's so I know about faddy eaters!
  • Kara_xxx
    Kara_xxx Posts: 635 Member

    That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

    This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".

    And in a lot of cases, they do... Children's bodies are growing and changing all the time, and often go through periods where the body is storing resources for a growth spurt. Obviously I'm not talking about major levels of excess weight, but applying adult standards to children's bodies is unwise. In physique, diet, or strenuous exercise, especially weight-lifting type activities.

    Growth spurts... that's upwards. We're talking sideways.
  • Flab2fitfi
    Flab2fitfi Posts: 1,349 Member
    If I offended it wasn't intentional

    And I know that there are kids that have mdeical problems, issues with eating habits etc, that even with the parnets best help they can do little about.

    But the vast majority or fat kids are fat because of what there parents feed them.

    I'm not offended - I know most kids that do get overweight it is through bad diet or lack of exercise. TBH until I had children with eating issues I always thought the parents were to blame but I know that there are reasons why some kids are over/underweight due to other issues so I'm more tolerant especially as I've had friend who deal with issue on a daily basis and get accused of bad parenting when its not.
  • Flab2fitfi
    Flab2fitfi Posts: 1,349 Member
    Schools dinners gotta be part of the problem as well? They look like absolute rubbish to me ? We don;t have them in Ireland, thankfully

    Luckily in in the uk they are very strict especially at primary school. They dont have chips and have about 3 portions of fruit and veg everyday. High school is a bit different as they have more choice and it is possible to spend all the money on junk.
  • 21June
    21June Posts: 99
    i agree. i have to say i have been overweight from about the the age of 4. iwhen i was younger i went to a babysitter. they fed me dinner and also fed me their son's leftovers from his plate and then i would go hom my mom would make my dinner (unaware ) that i had already eaten. it started then so from the age of 4 i have ben over weight. andno my parents never encouraged me to go out an play. i actually wans't allowed to go out and play unless it was in our back yard but that was only when mom would come out and watch me. so not very often (my whole family is over weight)

    i have never been taught to eat properly (im trying to teach myself) yes i know im 31 and should have taken control of this along time ago. ) i still live at home with mom and dad. and yeah she still feeds us all abslute crap. i jsut dont' eat it anymore. i have to say when i graduated high school i was around 250 pounds. at my highest i hit 319.
    my younger brother though i dont' know if he has ever stepped on a scale is at least 250-270..and all he does is sit and play video games and play on the computer and watch tv.

    i just cringe when i se young children now who are over weight as i know exactly what they are going through. alwaays teased and bullied as a chile and i have to say it destroys their self esteem. i really wish parents would "smarten" up and realize what they are doing to their children.
    wow that was longer then i thougth it was going to be. sorry
    Keep up the good work! I know of people whos family are overweight but have managed to break free if you see what I mean, :o)
  • castadiva
    castadiva Posts: 2,016 Member

    That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

    This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".

    And in a lot of cases, they do... Children's bodies are growing and changing all the time, and often go through periods where the body is storing resources for a growth spurt. Obviously I'm not talking about major levels of excess weight, but applying adult standards to children's bodies is unwise. In physique, diet, or strenuous exercise, especially weight-lifting type activities.

    Growth spurts... that's upwards. We're talking sideways.

    Yes... and children's still-growing bodies often do the latter in preparation for doing the former.
  • 21June
    21June Posts: 99

    That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

    This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".
    Or even, 'she just carrys a little weight round with her'
  • 21June
    21June Posts: 99
    If I offended it wasn't intentional

    And I know that there are kids that have mdeical problems, issues with eating habits etc, that even with the parnets best help they can do little about.

    But the vast majority or fat kids are fat because of what there parents feed them.
    Agreed!
  • My oldest child has autism and was always a poor eater which caused him to be really skinny. He was so skinny that you could see his rib cage and his younger brother was almost the same size as him. When I put him on medication to help with his aggression he gained a huge amount of weight. He would just eat, and eat, and eat. Now that I have switched his medication he has lost some weight and is finally starting to look normal again. The only problem is that changing the medication came with a price. We have new issues to deal with, and continue to struggle every day. For some people like myself there are a lot of challenges to over come in order to help your children with weight issues.
  • jennielou75
    jennielou75 Posts: 197 Member
    I was a middle child of three. I was always overweight from young childhood even though I ate the same as my normal weight siblings. We were not well off so the basics and no treats formed our menu. I have dyspraxia which meant many physical activities were very tough for me. I went to WW as a teen, our family doctor told my mum that 1 of my meals would feed him for 3 days....she would get seriously ill because she refused to go back to him she was so upset. I never weighed me age but was one of the only size 20 girls in my secondary school. As an adult the weight continued to pile on even though my diet was not that bad. I decided surgery was needed as I have tried every diet going and have been a gym member for years.

    I did lose weight once my diet was cut to 1100 calories a day before my op and I have lost 5 stone since Jan. 3 post op and 2 after. The docs could never explain why body needs fewer calories but that is the case.

    I worry about my niece who has a similar body shape to me and has overeating issues. Being an overweight child is not fun, an over weight teen is hell and I just hope she survives it. I hope she finds a way through and does not have to resort to surgery as I have had to.
  • 21June
    21June Posts: 99
    I must say that all these view points are very interesting. I just wondered what people's thoughts were really. As already mentioned by a fellow MFP member, it wasn't meant to be judgemental or offensive to any one. There seems to be a very fine line between what is right and what is wrong. Some things are very individual and not everyone is going to be competely honest. You never know what goes on or has happened behind closed doors or in other peoples lives. As I said before, this is not meant to be offensive towards anyone. However, on reflection although I have thought of this before; a healthier diet and more exercise should apply to everybody not just fat kids. :smile:
  • Like others here, I've been fat all my life. Teased, bullied, the last to get picked on sports teams, etc, etc. Some thirty years later I have realised that being overweight is not my birthright.

    Yes, I blame my parents, even though it makes me feel bad to blame them.

    I cry for the life I missed out on and it breaks my heart to see myself mirrored in the overweight kids I see.

    If seems a simple case of eating too much and not exercising enough. Unfortunately the emotions that lead to such behaviours are harder monsters to deal with.
  • carriempls
    carriempls Posts: 326 Member
    From what I see kids don't go out to play anymore, they don't run around, ride bikes etc. they are stuck in front of a telly or pc screen. My son is nine and he is really active, tv is only a treat when he has moved about a bit!
    I have a neice who is considerably overweight. She's 11 years old, about a foot shorter than me and currently weighs more than I do (and I'm overweight).

    The thing is, she's active as all get out. She's always got some sports or athletic lessons (karate, dance, swimming, etc.) and she rides her bike and plays outside all of the time. When I visit we go on long walks together and she keeps up just fine, often pressing ahead with more energy than me. It's not a lack of activity yet, but I worry she'll get lazier as she gets older if her weight doesn't change.

    It's all in the food. Their diet is atrocious and I really don't know how to better influence them. My brother and parents are all morbidly obese and my brother's wife is as well. Losing weight for me is a struggle considering the genes and early habits I developed but I've managed to pull myself out of it. Sadly the rest of my family doesn't seem to want do much to be healthlier.

    My sister-in-law was laid off in the winter and has been home with the kids all summer and they've been working on adopting better eating habits, but I worry that she and my brother don't have the correct nutrition knowledge. They have 2 boys too, but so far they're quite healthy looking, though I know they're not getting the right nutrition messages either. :(
  • ChappyEight
    ChappyEight Posts: 163 Member
    Is it just me but does any one else hate to see overweight children? I met up with an old friend yesterday whom I hadn't seen in years. One thing she said was that her 10 year old daughter is 11.5 stone and quite tall (I'm trying to set an example to my kids and get down to that weight)! Tall may be but I have seen pictures of her and there is something seriously wrong. She said she just eats and eats and eats...... She was also talking about putting a lock on the fridge and even kitchen cupboard! I don't know about anyone else but it seems that there is more and more fat kids these days. My friend herself is not particularly overweight and neither are her other children or partner. However, she was feeding her two sons aged 4 and 2; Greggs sausage rolls. She also said that her 4 year old has also already had four teeth fillings. After more discussion, her partner's Mum and Dad look after the children when she goes out to work and basically feed them a load of crap (like three ice lollies)! Is it a lack of knowledge or has anyone not got any common sense these days???

    I have nothing to add to this post. But I love your dialect, so I shall read your post again.
  • amy1612
    amy1612 Posts: 1,356 Member

    Anyway, the upshot is, cutting out dairy, grains, preservatives, added sweeteners of any kinds (including honey), and sticking to it has resulted in consistent weight loss for both of us.

    Um, I'm really glad this has helped with your joint weight-loss, and I can't imagine the challenges you face daily, but have you checked with your son's primary care doctor that cutting out dairy and grains is safe for him when he's so young? Dairy especially? Diets intended for adults sometimes don't provide adequate nutrition for kids, who need higher concentrations of certain elements in their diet. Just a thought.

    Kids dont actually NEED dairy and grains, human bodies arent designed to ingest dairy products. Just as much calcium can be gained through things like sardines, etc. Im sure she knows what she's doing. As long as the correct nutrients are getting through, they dont need to come from grains or dairy, i.e. getting fibre from veg instead of bran flakes and such.
  • Gwoman2012
    Gwoman2012 Posts: 163 Member
    This is a great worry of mine with my own children. They are only 2 and 4 so it is really easy to control their diet right now.

    You have to understand that as a parent, our entire fat society is working against you. They get crappy cupcakes at school regularly because it is always someone's birthday. They just have to have an atrocious snack after sports practice (remember oranges after soccer? Now it's sugar drinks and sugar granola bars). School lunches are a joke.

    As they get older it's fast food, peer pressure, movie theater crap, etc. yes, we are the parents and we control their food, but that doesn't mean it is easy. I will continue to fight as the world works against me because I believe it is worth it in the long run.
  • I agree! I hate when parents say my child will not eat fruits or vegetables. I wonder why? There are no other options in the house but junk food!! It's about opportunities.
  • rileymama
    rileymama Posts: 196 Member
    Honestly, kids eat too much garbage, and everything has sugar in it....there is a rare disease though (I know a kid with it), where the child never feels full? She is huge, poor thing, and the mom has to cut her off after certaqin amounts and give her meds. She says it breaks her heart, b/c the girl says she's hungry, but the doctorts and nutritionalist have educated her on how much and what to feed her daughter so she is not in fact "starving" butstill..poor girl always feels hungry :(
  • I completely agree! I can't believe how blind some of my friends are to their childs obesity. They think it is good to from the very beginning to give them lots of formula, because the breast just isn't enough. Then later they add rice to the formula to fatten them up even more. From there its all about fattening the kids up and then claim they are big boned or tall. It's a shame - I have seen 7 year old children eat more in calories than I eat in 2 days in one meal. These kids have surpassed what is in a happy meal at mcdonalds. I don't see why any child should eat 3000 calories in one sitting. God forbid somebody say something to the parents without them getting super offensive about it. We actually did have a lady in Cleveland loose her child to Children Services for her son being too overweight and not doing enough to get his weight down.
  • JenMull44
    JenMull44 Posts: 226 Member
    From what I see kids don't go out to play anymore, they don't run around, ride bikes etc. they are stuck in front of a telly or pc screen. My son is nine and he is really active, tv is only a treat when he has moved about a bit!

    This has been debunked (will try to find UK study) activity levels haven't dropped. Turns out we're just feeding them fatty, sugary rubbish then blaming them for being lazy because it's easier. Bet your son doesn't come home to big macs and pizza every night.
    True ! In the area that I live in, kids are in sports all year round. Thier parents do not give them a break in the summer or winter. I blame the parents and the price of food. Its much cheaper to buy a happy meal than to go to Whole Foods and buy an entire meal that you have to cook. Not to mention all the single moms out there that are working two jobs to support their famiies, you cant blame them for grabbing something fast and cheap. It feeds the kids but unfortunatlye teaches them bad habits at the same time.
  • nxd10
    nxd10 Posts: 4,570 Member
    I'm a developmental psychologist focusing on adolescents and it is a major public health issue.

    I find it SO depressing when I see families out. Grandmothers thinner than mothers and mothers thinner than kids. That's just wrong.

    It is a complex problem that we - ALL - have to solve.
  • RuthSweetTooth
    RuthSweetTooth Posts: 461 Member
    If your kids have a weight problem it is because the parents usually do.