Overweight and obese children!!!

Kara_xxx

My best friend is a senior dentist at a dental school and runs a pediatric clinic. She frequently sees children who need SUBSTANTIAL numbers of extractions due to dental caries quite clearly caused by constant eating of sweets and lack of parental supervision with personal hygiene. My friend is NOT allowed to criticise the parents, only to "advise" that constant cola, sweets and not cleaning their teeth before bed might not be a good plan for their dental health. She had an 9 year old girl who needed to have ALL her milk teeth removed in an attempt to ensure that the second set grew through without caries. I think that's despicable and worthy of a referral to social services, never mind a bit of gentle advice.

My ex-partner's daughter had this - most of her milk teeth filled or removed because they were so rotten. One of the reasons we broke up was his parenting style - if princess didn't want to do anything, such as eat anything other than nuggets and chips, drink anything other than coke, clean her teeth, tidy her toys away - she didn't have to do it. She ate sweets whenever she wanted. He didn't even wake up when she had to have 5 teeth removed and a filling in an ADULT tooth at the age of 11. She developed chronic constipation because her diet was so bad, she always had stomach ache, and that didn't wake him or his ex wife up to improve her diet and get her drinking more water. I couldn't bear it and as a step parent I had very little influence other than making suggestions and offering to help with a healthier lifestyle. Sometimes he would try, but he couldn't bear her being unhappy so would inevitably give in and she'd be back on the crap.

Ironic isn't it "he couldn't bear her being unhappy"... Her future unhappiness as an obese adult with chronic health problems he'll have on his conscience, because he couldn't deal with a bit of conflict when she was little. I see a lot of this "anything for a quiet life" parenting, of treating children like little adults... and this whole movement of trying to be their 'friend' rather than a parent.

MessyLittlePanda

That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".

super_monty

I saw a massively fat kid on the bus with the massive Mother they went 2 short stops, the kid had a full fat can of coke a huge chocolate bar and a bag of crisps.

I felt like say to the Mum that's child abuse whats wrong with giving her an apple, a bottle of water and ******* walking you moron.

You see this kind of stuff everyday now, where I live, the parent are in denial.

I blame the parents, same excuses, no time, no money, my kid wont eat anything else - all bollocks.

I can cook a healthy meal for four in the same time as the microwave, it can be about the same price, if you stop giving a kid junk food they will eat anything when they are hungry enough.

I made sure I did not pass my old bad habits on to my child.

castadiva

That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".

And in a lot of cases, they do... Children's bodies are growing and changing all the time, and often go through periods where the body is storing resources for a growth spurt. Obviously I'm not talking about major levels of excess weight, but applying adult standards to children's bodies is unwise. In physique, diet, or strenuous exercise, especially weight-lifting type activities.

thebigcb

If I offended it wasn't intentional

And I know that there are kids that have mdeical problems, issues with eating habits etc, that even with the parnets best help they can do little about.

But the vast majority or fat kids are fat because of what there parents feed them.

super_monty

That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".

There is massive denial I saw two Mothers outside a school going mental because they had been told their kids where obese at 5 years old by the school nurse.

They where saying their brother and sisters were the same and thats just the way they are built. They miss the point both of the parents were morbidly obese and have passed it on to their children. That chocolate bar or bag of sweets they given them after school everyday is not needed along with the rest of the junk.

thebigcb

Schools dinners gotta be part of the problem as well? They look like absolute rubbish to me ? We don;t have them in Ireland, thankfully

Meraid

I've been overweight my whole life, despite going out to play with friends outside all the time and dancing and playing baseball. When I wanted a snack I would call for my mom and ask. We had fruit every night. We only had ice cream after our baths and the computer didn't really come into play until I was 9. The TV wasn't too big either, unless sailor moon was on. I was really just.. out playing with friends all of the time. I don't know when things went down hill.

diadojikohei

I don't just think it is what children are given I think it is the size of the portion too. My cousin's wife gives her 4 and 2 year old the same amount of food as an adult would eat, I couldn't believe it! Then she said as she put the food down, 'Eat it all up and there's ice cream for pudding' , the 2 year old didn't eat it all and wasn't given an ice cream! She had to sit at the table and watch everyone else eat one!
My cousin and her husband both have PhD's and are in very well paid jobs, they are not stupid people!
The 4 year old wears my daughter's age 8 dresses.
It's really difficult to be there and watch this intelligent woman creating eating disorders with 2 lovely children.

My 4 are skinny and are grazers, smaller meals and snacks of bread, fruit and dairy.

I also have a child with Asperger's so I know about faddy eaters!

Kara_xxx

That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".

And in a lot of cases, they do... Children's bodies are growing and changing all the time, and often go through periods where the body is storing resources for a growth spurt. Obviously I'm not talking about major levels of excess weight, but applying adult standards to children's bodies is unwise. In physique, diet, or strenuous exercise, especially weight-lifting type activities.

Growth spurts... that's upwards. We're talking sideways.

Flab2fitfi

If I offended it wasn't intentional

And I know that there are kids that have mdeical problems, issues with eating habits etc, that even with the parnets best help they can do little about.

But the vast majority or fat kids are fat because of what there parents feed them.

I'm not offended - I know most kids that do get overweight it is through bad diet or lack of exercise. TBH until I had children with eating issues I always thought the parents were to blame but I know that there are reasons why some kids are over/underweight due to other issues so I'm more tolerant especially as I've had friend who deal with issue on a daily basis and get accused of bad parenting when its not.

Flab2fitfi

Schools dinners gotta be part of the problem as well? They look like absolute rubbish to me ? We don;t have them in Ireland, thankfully

Luckily in in the uk they are very strict especially at primary school. They dont have chips and have about 3 portions of fruit and veg everyday. High school is a bit different as they have more choice and it is possible to spend all the money on junk.

21June

i agree. i have to say i have been overweight from about the the age of 4. iwhen i was younger i went to a babysitter. they fed me dinner and also fed me their son's leftovers from his plate and then i would go hom my mom would make my dinner (unaware ) that i had already eaten. it started then so from the age of 4 i have ben over weight. andno my parents never encouraged me to go out an play. i actually wans't allowed to go out and play unless it was in our back yard but that was only when mom would come out and watch me. so not very often (my whole family is over weight)

i have never been taught to eat properly (im trying to teach myself) yes i know im 31 and should have taken control of this along time ago. ) i still live at home with mom and dad. and yeah she still feeds us all abslute crap. i jsut dont' eat it anymore. i have to say when i graduated high school i was around 250 pounds. at my highest i hit 319.
my younger brother though i dont' know if he has ever stepped on a scale is at least 250-270..and all he does is sit and play video games and play on the computer and watch tv.

i just cringe when i se young children now who are over weight as i know exactly what they are going through. alwaays teased and bullied as a chile and i have to say it destroys their self esteem. i really wish parents would "smarten" up and realize what they are doing to their children.
wow that was longer then i thougth it was going to be. sorry

Keep up the good work! I know of people whos family are overweight but have managed to break free if you see what I mean, )

castadiva

That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".

And in a lot of cases, they do... Children's bodies are growing and changing all the time, and often go through periods where the body is storing resources for a growth spurt. Obviously I'm not talking about major levels of excess weight, but applying adult standards to children's bodies is unwise. In physique, diet, or strenuous exercise, especially weight-lifting type activities.

Growth spurts... that's upwards. We're talking sideways.

Yes... and children's still-growing bodies often do the latter in preparation for doing the former.

21June

That's the problem... They don't. Studies time and time across various western countries reveal that parents are blind to child obesity and think their size is not a problem. When shown images of healthy weight children they often think they are underweight.

This and the denial factor - parents usually do not want to admit their child is overweight, or they say things like "they'll grow out of it" or "it's puppy fat".

Or even, 'she just carrys a little weight round with her'

21June

If I offended it wasn't intentional

And I know that there are kids that have mdeical problems, issues with eating habits etc, that even with the parnets best help they can do little about.

But the vast majority or fat kids are fat because of what there parents feed them.

Agreed!

littlemisscrazygirl

My oldest child has autism and was always a poor eater which caused him to be really skinny. He was so skinny that you could see his rib cage and his younger brother was almost the same size as him. When I put him on medication to help with his aggression he gained a huge amount of weight. He would just eat, and eat, and eat. Now that I have switched his medication he has lost some weight and is finally starting to look normal again. The only problem is that changing the medication came with a price. We have new issues to deal with, and continue to struggle every day. For some people like myself there are a lot of challenges to over come in order to help your children with weight issues.

jennielou75

I was a middle child of three. I was always overweight from young childhood even though I ate the same as my normal weight siblings. We were not well off so the basics and no treats formed our menu. I have dyspraxia which meant many physical activities were very tough for me. I went to WW as a teen, our family doctor told my mum that 1 of my meals would feed him for 3 days....she would get seriously ill because she refused to go back to him she was so upset. I never weighed me age but was one of the only size 20 girls in my secondary school. As an adult the weight continued to pile on even though my diet was not that bad. I decided surgery was needed as I have tried every diet going and have been a gym member for years.

I did lose weight once my diet was cut to 1100 calories a day before my op and I have lost 5 stone since Jan. 3 post op and 2 after. The docs could never explain why body needs fewer calories but that is the case.

I worry about my niece who has a similar body shape to me and has overeating issues. Being an overweight child is not fun, an over weight teen is hell and I just hope she survives it. I hope she finds a way through and does not have to resort to surgery as I have had to.

21June

I must say that all these view points are very interesting. I just wondered what people's thoughts were really. As already mentioned by a fellow MFP member, it wasn't meant to be judgemental or offensive to any one. There seems to be a very fine line between what is right and what is wrong. Some things are very individual and not everyone is going to be competely honest. You never know what goes on or has happened behind closed doors or in other peoples lives. As I said before, this is not meant to be offensive towards anyone. However, on reflection although I have thought of this before; a healthier diet and more exercise should apply to everybody not just fat kids.

stephanie_pephanie

Like others here, I've been fat all my life. Teased, bullied, the last to get picked on sports teams, etc, etc. Some thirty years later I have realised that being overweight is not my birthright.

Yes, I blame my parents, even though it makes me feel bad to blame them.

I cry for the life I missed out on and it breaks my heart to see myself mirrored in the overweight kids I see.

If seems a simple case of eating too much and not exercising enough. Unfortunately the emotions that lead to such behaviours are harder monsters to deal with.