Overweight and obese children!!!

Brooke_26

It's so sad to see families at the grocery store/market with their carts filled up with nothing but junk food (chips, pop, boxed frozen foods, sugared cereals, etc etc)...where are the fruits, where are the veggies?? I've heard excuses such as "it costs way too much to eat healthy", I've got to completely disagree......

I have a relative that I have seen spiral down with her health, and now she's passing it on to both her daughters. She used to be healthy, had 2 child,ren, and gets no exercise, eats fast food & junk all the time, and has gained an incredible amount of weight. She called me 6 weeks ago telling me she was fed up...wanted help...wanted suggestions on what she could do. After giving her suggestions such as walking, etc., she choose to do the Biggest Loser exercise vid..great!! (Day 1 done..great, she complained of soreness.....DAy 2 done, great, she again said she was sore, which is natural....Day 3 done....then she quit...she didn't like it....she said she had no time to do it....after talking with her, she doesn't want to do anything right now and got offended. I guess the "time" comes in your life when "YOU" have to have enough and will decide to change. I will always be there to help however I can, but I can't do the workouts for her...I can't do the cooking healthy for her....and whats sad, she's 2 years younger than me...25...but complains about pains, etc like she's 90....I pray she wakes up before something seriously goes wrong with her healthy.....

OH YEA, and then she tells me 'why do you rollar blade and run..you don't need to do that stuff all the time......yes I do, it's become a part of my daily routine..I must have exercise....I only wish she would give it a try for more than 3 days before giving up

Flab2fitfi

so all you people against intervention really dont think someone should get involved with a malnourished or obese child?

just let the parent keep making that kids health worse and worse?

really?

Yes if there is a clear case of neglect but there are normally more signs than an overweight/underweight child but how can you judge from one glance that a child is being abused because of their weight.

I'm glad society does not go out reporting every underweight/overweight as I could never leave the house. As I have said before I know that many children who are obese are so because of poor diet or lack of exercise but we should not be so quick to judge.

Do you know how hard it is to leave the house with a child who has behavioural problems - its hard enough knowing that we are judged on how they act but to also be judged on how they look - might as well though away the keys now.

violetta88

If the malnourishment or obesity was severe enough that a legal team could make a case for neglect, then yes. Though it would take an extreme case for that even to be discussed.

But please, please try to understand - we do not have the resources to intervene to that degree. Do you have any idea what is required to FORCEFULLY intervene in how a parent raises their child?

CP is a department that is notorious for being overworked and understaffed. I work in a team that struggles daily to provide the necessary support for children with far, far more serious issues. It would be impossible to start up child protection plans for every child that was clinically overweight.

chicky26

I get sooooo upset with rude comments about overweight children as its a subject close to my heart . . . . . . . . . . . . .

As you can all see I am not fat but have previously been fat. I have worked sooo hard, eat well and exercise nearly everyday setting my family a good example.

My 11 year old son is a whole other kettle of fish.

I introduce to you my 11 year old son, well my whole family in fact.



He is over weight and nomatter what we seem to do I cant seem to get him to loose weight . . . . . . . .

1) we take him to play at the park, ice skating, badminton etc regularly.
2) he eats what we eat
3) we limit treats to just one per day, be it a packet of crisps, a buscuit or chocolate. Not one of each, just one of the selection.

The problems . . . . . . . . . .

1) he has behavoiral and socialising problems
2) getting him out the house can take two hours of arguing
3) in new activities he will just cause problems/refuse to join in/ruin it for all, if it something he doesnt want to do like when we have tried many physical activities such as kung fu irregardless of harsh punishment
4) I think he is sneaking down stairs and sneaking food. Not crisps or chocolates because they are very limited in the house but bread and sauces and bowls of cerals etc . . . . . .
5) because he has no friends he has no one to play out with extra to the phyical activities we take him to do.

I find it sooo difficult with him, I try so hard to get him to move, feed him good and healthy foods (nothing fried, no take aways, all home cooked from scratch), limit treats and set a very good example. He is under a specialist and on medication, which makes his weight matters worse.

I wish people would stop taring the parents of overwweight children with the same brush.

Rant over. Sorry.

21June

I saw a 3 year old girl at the water park who was so fat she could barely climb the stairs to the water element. The parents were also quite large. How can this not be their fault? All the other kids were running from her, so sad. Another issue with pre packaged and fast foods though, my mother in law is raising her daughters 4 kids, all are normal weight but the 9 and 11 yr old have high cholesteral! How horrible is that. So just because a child is not over weight does not mean an un healthy diet is not affecting your health.

Absolutely agree with you there!

Laces_0ut

I get sooooo upset with rude comments about overweight children as its a subject close to my heart . . . . . . . . . . . . .

As you can all see I am not fat but have previously been fat. I have worked sooo hard, eat well and exercise nearly everyday setting my family a good example.

My 11 year old son is a whole other kettle of fish.

I introduce to you my 11 year old son, well my whole family in fact.

for the record when i am talking about obese kids i am envisioning kids much heavier than yours. as with malnourished...im talking about kids who are signficantly underweight.

chicky26

I get sooooo upset with rude comments about overweight children as its a subject close to my heart . . . . . . . . . . . . .

As you can all see I am not fat but have previously been fat. I have worked sooo hard, eat well and exercise nearly everyday setting my family a good example.

My 11 year old son is a whole other kettle of fish.

I introduce to you my 11 year old son, well my whole family in fact.

for the record when i am talking about obese kids i am envisioning kids much heavier than yours. as with malnourished...im talking about kids who are signficantly underweight.

Technically my son for his height and weight is obese. He has a chest to rival mine and love handles. Buying clothes to fit him is extremely difficult and often need altering. Perhaps his suit is discuising his weight problem.

I understand and agree that there are children much larger then my own, however he is obese and his weight is my responsabilty. I put in so much hard work and effort to keep his weight under control, and perhaps my efforts are stopping him from getting much larger then he already is.

BUT when people are rude about over weight children and their parents they seem to assume that the parents are neglecting/not caring about their child!!

This is as far removed from the actual situation with me and my family and I resent being bracketed with the parents who actually dont give a crap / would give anything to their child to shut them up / are lazy.

Once again sorry for the rant, it justs make me mad as I care very much.

orthetiger

I didn't read through this entire thread, but I'm really disheartened and upset but how judgmental and just generally mean people can be in a place where I would think people would have some basic human empathy.

First of all, obesity - in adults and children - is VERY closely linked with poverty. We have a government that subsidizes the least healthy foods, funneling tax dollars into protecting the industries that made foods which are unhealthy and arguably physically addictive. Marketing companies target children direction. Stop assuming everybody's circumstances are the same as your own. They are not.

Also, CALLING KIDS FAT - in a forum where they can see it or not - DOES NOT MAKE THEM THINNER. It makes their food problems worse. I was not an overweight child and I can pinpoint the moment that my eating disorders started. I remember being weighed in class as a soul-crushing experience in the 4th grade, I remember being called "fat" as an insult amount children even though I was not, and I believed it. I had bulimia by high school. I was not an anomaly. Everyone in my generation has a terrible relationship with food.

We need to teach our children to be active and to eat healthy plant-based foods. Absolutely. But if you cloak this in the language of bad parenting, the language of judgements, the language of SHAME for people's bodies, YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM. Step back. If you REALLY want to address this problem, go to your local school and volunteer to run an athletics group for kids who feel uncomfortable in traditional athletics. Get these kids moving. Donate HEALTHY FOODS to a local food back, not your leftover ramen noodles.

mamagooskie

There are soooooooooooo many fat kids now a days. I saw a boy at the beach yesterday with bigger boobs than me!! (I'm like a D so I ain't small) and so many parents just don't care.

You go to the grocery store and I've seen people with carts full of junkfood.....not a veggie in sight yet everyone in the family is obese. Lets not mention the all you can eat buffets......I saw this mom, dad and kid and I bet combined they weighed 1000lbs.

It's one of the reasons I try so hard now to make sure my kids don't get like that by trying to get them to be active everyday and make sure I always have healthy food around.

caraiselite

it's child abuse, plain and simple.

kaotik26

Eating too much crap. Everytime trans fats show up on my diary I stop buying that food. One of my daughter's favorites, hotdogs, is not banned from our house. I refuse to feed her junk. She loves to eat baby tomatoes and almonds and romaine lettuce leaves!

bulbadoof

I get really annoyed when people always blame the parents for this. I was an obese child and my parents tried their best to stop me. They'd put locks on the cupboards, they wouldn't serve me seconds, they made good, nutritious meals and always had raw cut veggies in the fridge, they always said 'no' when I asked for fast food while we were out, and they limited my time spent inside on nice days.

I found ways. I had friends whose parents worked all day and couldn't stop them from overeating and spending all their time inside and I spent my "outside time" at their houses. I sneaked leftovers from the kitchen when my family had finished and was in the living room. I began to regard late nights when everyone was asleep and times the adults would go out alone as binge eating time. I even stole money from my dad's change tin and snuck up to the store to get candies on weekends before my parents even woke up.

Maybe I'm an exception since I was the only overweight person in my family, but due to my experience I never look at the parents first when I see an overweight kid. I don't know the whole story and it's really none of my business anyway.

RealWomenLovePitbulls

I don't have kids yet, but my parents are like that with other kids, they think they always have to be eating something or drinking juice/milk, i already tell them that when i have kids, they are going to eat healthy and not go get a bunch of junk at grandma and grandpas... a treat now and then is okay, but kids dont have to constantly have something in their mouths, and the sugar is just bad for their teeth if they are drinking juice all the time

21June

I didn't read through this entire thread, but I'm really disheartened and upset but how judgmental and just generally mean people can be in a place where I would think people would have some basic human empathy.

First of all, obesity - in adults and children - is VERY closely linked with poverty. We have a government that subsidizes the least healthy foods, funneling tax dollars into protecting the industries that made foods which are unhealthy and arguably physically addictive. Marketing companies target children direction. Stop assuming everybody's circumstances are the same as your own. They are not.

Also, CALLING KIDS FAT - in a forum where they can see it or not - DOES NOT MAKE THEM THINNER. It makes their food problems worse. I was not an overweight child and I can pinpoint the moment that my eating disorders started. I remember being weighed in class as a soul-crushing experience in the 4th grade, I remember being called "fat" as an insult amount children even though I was not, and I believed it. I had bulimia by high school. I was not an anomaly. Everyone in my generation has a terrible relationship with food.

We need to teach our children to be active and to eat healthy plant-based foods. Absolutely. But if you cloak this in the language of bad parenting, the language of judgements, the language of SHAME for people's bodies, YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM. Step back. If you REALLY want to address this problem, go to your local school and volunteer to run an athletics group for kids who feel uncomfortable in traditional athletics. Get these kids moving. Donate HEALTHY FOODS to a local food back, not your leftover ramen noodles.

Good suggestions! However, its interesting that you think its closely related to poverty...... I'm not saying this is always the case but there is a girl in my son's class. She is 8 and clearly obese and so are her Mum, Dad and brother. They seem to be eating out like nearly every weekend and do not appear to be living in poverty I can tell you!

emily_fox

As an adult who decides to have a child it is your responsibility to ensure that your child learns what it needs to know in order to live in the world. It isn't just food I am sorry to say. Parents (and I don't mean anyone specifically just in general) are lazy. This is one of my biggest peeves so forgive me if I rant. I will say from the start that if the child has a medically diagnosed condition then this is not directed at them. This is for 'normal' children with no other problems...Also when I say 'you' or 'your' this is in the general not directed at anyone in specific so please no one be offended

I have seen children sitting in strollers well past time when they should be walking..if a child can walk then that's it for the stroller apart from very rare occasions when it is simply too much walking for a small child. Don't be scared to push them a little. If a parent lets them get away with being lazy, eating everything they want and talking back then this is what they will get. Period.

I've seen kids having temper tantrums in the middle of shops because they want something and the parents just standing there watching them..for pity's sake take the kid outside. If they can't control themselves it is the parents job to do it for them. If that means the grocery shopping needs to get done another time when the child is either behaving or with a sitter then that's what has to happen. Children ARE inconvenient, life does not just go on as if nothing happened when you have one. Perenting takes effort.

When there is crap in the house that is what the kids want. If they don't KNOW what a coke is then they won't ask for it. If they have never been to McDonalds then they don't ask for it. If they don't KNOW that kids "aren't supposed to like" liver, brussel sprouts and vegetables they will eat whatever they are given. Children will eat what you eat. If they are offered treats then that is what they will want - I mean would you rather eat something yummy and chocolaty sweet or a big plate of spinach?? Kids aren't stupid..they will go for the treats every time if they have the choice. The trick is not to give them that choice until they are responsible enough to make it and by that time if everything has been done with the best interest of the child in mind they won't 'crave' crap.

The job of a parent is not to be friends, or buddies with their child.. it is to parent them. To make the decisions regarding what they eat and how much of it. To explain when they cry or whine that the behavior will not be tolerated and they do not get the choice. It's annoying to deal with a screaming child yes, but honestly, it takes only a few times to break them of those habits and have a respectful child that listens, does what they are told and has no food fetishes (most of the time).

There is nothing wrong with offering a treat on occasion but if it is offered daily or with any frequency then the child will expect it. Right now we are fighting this with our 4 yr old because he is not with us full time and gets given treats by others who take care of him. Last night he asked for a reward for doing something he was asked to do..omg child.. needless to say he was advised that this is not an acceptable behavior and I guarantee he will not ask again.

We have junk in the house since my thin as a rail boyfriend likes to pig out on things, but he responsible enough not to do it until AFTER his son goes to bed and to clean up the wrappers, and bags before the morning because if it is left out in sight his son will ask for some. Monkey see, Monkey do..

Take a jump - this post pissed me off so much.
Your thin as a rail boyfriend likes to pig out on things - so its okay because he is thin and doesn't do it in front of son.


Look...she said "please no one be offended." Stop being so sensitive. Yeah, her boyfriend is an ADULT, so yes, he can eat whatever the HECK he wants to. And yes, he is keeping it out of sight from his son, that's called a COMPROMISE.

lumina0o0

I find it sad when kids are over weight. It breaks my heart. I often wonder how they are eating and how much they get out and move. I do know of some cases where kids move a lot and still are over weight, but their eating habits are not great. My kids get mad when I feed them healthy foods and tell me when they get older they wont make those sort of things, but they are only 5 and 4, so I'm hoping as they get older I will have taught them enough to understand why we eat the way we do. I would also like to say, that I don't make a lot of money. I still try to buy as healthy of foods as possible.

lumina0o0

I get sooooo upset with rude comments about overweight children as its a subject close to my heart . . . . . . . . . . . . .

As you can all see I am not fat but have previously been fat. I have worked sooo hard, eat well and exercise nearly everyday setting my family a good example.

My 11 year old son is a whole other kettle of fish.

I introduce to you my 11 year old son, well my whole family in fact.



He is over weight and nomatter what we seem to do I cant seem to get him to loose weight . . . . . . . .

1) we take him to play at the park, ice skating, badminton etc regularly.
2) he eats what we eat
3) we limit treats to just one per day, be it a packet of crisps, a buscuit or chocolate. Not one of each, just one of the selection.

The problems . . . . . . . . . .

1) he has behavoiral and socialising problems
2) getting him out the house can take two hours of arguing
3) in new activities he will just cause problems/refuse to join in/ruin it for all, if it something he doesnt want to do like when we have tried many physical activities such as kung fu irregardless of harsh punishment
4) I think he is sneaking down stairs and sneaking food. Not crisps or chocolates because they are very limited in the house but bread and sauces and bowls of cerals etc . . . . . .
5) because he has no friends he has no one to play out with extra to the phyical activities we take him to do.

I find it sooo difficult with him, I try so hard to get him to move, feed him good and healthy foods (nothing fried, no take aways, all home cooked from scratch), limit treats and set a very good example. He is under a specialist and on medication, which makes his weight matters worse.

I wish people would stop taring the parents of overwweight children with the same brush.

Rant over. Sorry.

I would first like to say, your son does not look that overweight. I think that you are taking the right steps to help him. As well as it is harder to put these things in place when your kids get older. Now that I've said those things I would also like to point out that often times kids get a little on the heavy side before a growth spurt. So, often when I look at these posts I am hoping they are talking about kids that are REALLY over weight. Kids that weigh my weight and above or over 200 at 10...(sorry if your son is at that weight, he doesn't look it to me.) that is too much. I also think that though often we assume when we look at these kids that its something wrong with the parents, we do know there are special cases where they can be on medication and it causes them to be over weight or under in some cases (my husband on Ritalin as a kid). I hope that your son gets all the help he needs.

orthetiger

Good suggestions! However, its interesting that you think its closely related to poverty...... I'm not saying this is always the case but there is a girl in my son's class. She is 8 and clearly obese and so are her Mum, Dad and brother. They seem to be eating out like nearly every weekend and do not appear to be living in poverty I can tell you!

Yes, of course I do not mean that it every instance overweight people live in poverty. But there is a correlation. The problem with anecdote is that it doesn't tell us enough. We need the overall picture. Poverty is not the only cause by any means, and I didn't mean to make it seem like it was.

geral4479WECHANGED

Some kids just have weight problems because of their genes. I was one of these kids. You see kids who are rails and eat like pigs. I don't think the heavier kids are eating much more....not most of them anyway.

True. My brother used to be thin but ate far more than I did and I was never a thin child.

lumina0o0

Good suggestions! However, its interesting that you think its closely related to poverty...... I'm not saying this is always the case but there is a girl in my son's class. She is 8 and clearly obese and so are her Mum, Dad and brother. They seem to be eating out like nearly every weekend and do not appear to be living in poverty I can tell you!

Yes, of course I do not mean that it every instance overweight people live in poverty. But there is a correlation. The problem with anecdote is that it doesn't tell us enough. We need the overall picture. Poverty is not the only cause by any means, and I didn't mean to make it seem like it was.

I would like to take the time to introduce you to my children...

Right now I'm out of work, my husband doesn't get paid much, we live in low income housing, and can barely make rent...Pretty damn near to poverty...I feed my kids fruits and vegetables every day. There snacks are fruits...we eat whole grain breads, pastas...I do NOT want my kids to grow up the way I did. I also try to make sure they get outside for at least an hour 5x a week.

jzsor12

she should give them better nutrition. I understand that some unhealthy food is a lot cheaper and maybe more convenient but having such dental work at 4 years old. No excuse.

albayin

I don;t have children but I wonder if this is a sort of "egg and chicken which first" question. I watched lots of documentaries and heard some real life stories about children were born big and chubby. They got bullied at school and made them very depressed. Without friends and cheerful spirits, they turn to food for comfort.. Well sounds like a vicious cycle...However I am not sure how many of the obese children actually are this case.

Gwoman2012

Anecdotal evidence is SO awesome.

That is awesome your kids are not overweight even though you are going through financial troubles. That does not mean poverty does not lead to obesity in a lot of people. Have you seen The Weight of the Nation? There are some neighborhoods in the US that have no safe areas for children to run around in. Their parents work full time for minimum wage and have nothing leftover for sports or other activities, not to mention the time or vehicles to take them to such activities, Some of these neighborhoods don't even have GROCERY STORES. People are literally doing their food shopping at 7-11.

Oh, and these children qualify for free breakfast and lunch at school and guess what that means? Poptarts and pizza.

orthetiger

I would like to take the time to introduce you to my children...

Right now I'm out of work, my husband doesn't get paid much, we live in low income housing, and can barely make rent...Pretty damn near to poverty...I feed my kids fruits and vegetables every day. There snacks are fruits...we eat whole grain breads, pastas...I do NOT want my kids to grow up the way I did. I also try to make sure they get outside for at least an hour 5x a week.

You have a beautiful family and it is great to hear everyone eats lots of veggies and gos outside. It sounds like you are doing a really good job.

But... like I said, anecdote proves nothing. People who assume everyone can and/or should do exactly what they do generally have difficulty seeing the big picture. There are complex and interconnected reasons for obesity and unhealthy eating and exercise patterns in children, and the reason is not simply Other Parents Just Aren't As Good As You Are™.

Here is an interesting article about the role of genetics: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/ezra-klein/post/parents-more-than-parenting-may-be-to-blame-for-obesity/2011/11/28/gIQALOfk4N_blog.html

GaidenJade

I have mixed feelings on this issue.

Front up, I started off badly with my children. Since I didn't care what I ate, of course I didn't care about what they ate. However, my son (1st child) was always thin until recently and I never had to worry. It wasn't until my daughter was born that I began to realize how my habits affected my children. Which is one of the things that got me on track with eating better.

Now neither of my children are morbidly obese though my daughter has been big bellied since she was born. (Her father's genetics.) I admit, that when I see a child that huffs to walk up a small hill, I get a little sick and worry over that child and wonder what the parents are feeding him. But when I look around at the other overweight kids that are a bit less overweight but still what I call..thick... I am reminded of my friends as a kid. Now luckily I was rail thin..ate like a pig and never stopped moving around.... back then anyway.... but they were thick. Heavy, even nearly on the obese side. I remember that we ate the same things, and played just as hard.

Now they are thinner, though still not fit and thin.

The ones that I think are what the OP was talking about was the morbidly obese, obviously unhealthy children. But the others, those our new age BMI tells us are overweight, should be left alone for the most part. Let them be kids. Feed them right, but don't make them stress over their weight. It's ridiculous. Sometimes, not always, it's their genetics. My daughter is a prime example.

Truthfully she doesn't eat totally right, I'm working on that but she has her grandparents around her finger. (Neither of them are allowed to drink soda very often. Like maybe one or two cans a week and that is usually because of grandpa) But she is chunky. As she's getting taller I notice she is thinning out. I'm on her all the time about being active, but the last thing I want is her worrying about her weight. She already asks me if she's fat. She's 7 YEARS OLD! Sheesh.

"Healthy, not thin." That's what I tell her all the time. I'm hoping that my journey to become healthier, and my example and my strictness will eventually pay off. But as I said, I didn't start off well, so she already has a taste of bad foods.

When you look at a large child, you never know what the parent is doing to help. If someone were to look at my daughter and tell me she's fat and I am abusing her, then I would call them out. She's big, but she's only 7. It will take time for the damage I have done to her taste buds, to change.

Gwoman2012

The thought of either of my children having to struggle with their weight (and the emotional turmoil it brings) scares me so much it makes me not take the easy way out.

BUT I am a stay at home parent with a husband who has a good income, I have the time and the resources...I realize it isn't so easy for everyone.

kaotik26

It is wrong to always blame the parents. Sometimes its more than eating junk and not exercising and unless you ask then you don't know for sure. When I do blame parents is when I see their shopping cart full of junk and soda, (and no I don't snoop in their cart, it's just observation as you pass by) or when a kid is throwing a tantrum because he wants candy NOW! As parents it's our responsibility to teach them self control, compromise and moderation. I know I wont have to ever lock the cupboards because my daughter will never have to feel like she needs to sneak cookies from it, first she will know better, second they won't be there. She can sneak all the apples and carrots she wants!

suziecue66

I didn't read through this entire thread, but I'm really disheartened and upset but how judgmental and just generally mean people can be in a place where I would think people would have some basic human empathy.

First of all, obesity - in adults and children - is VERY closely linked with poverty. We have a government that subsidizes the least healthy foods, funneling tax dollars into protecting the industries that made foods which are unhealthy and arguably physically addictive. Marketing companies target children direction. Stop assuming everybody's circumstances are the same as your own. They are not.

Also, CALLING KIDS FAT - in a forum where they can see it or not - DOES NOT MAKE THEM THINNER. It makes their food problems worse. I was not an overweight child and I can pinpoint the moment that my eating disorders started. I remember being weighed in class as a soul-crushing experience in the 4th grade, I remember being called "fat" as an insult amount children even though I was not, and I believed it. I had bulimia by high school. I was not an anomaly. Everyone in my generation has a terrible relationship with food.

We need to teach our children to be active and to eat healthy plant-based foods. Absolutely. But if you cloak this in the language of bad parenting, the language of judgements, the language of SHAME for people's bodies, YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM. Step back. If you REALLY want to address this problem, go to your local school and volunteer to run an athletics group for kids who feel uncomfortable in traditional athletics. Get these kids moving. Donate HEALTHY FOODS to a local food back, not your leftover ramen noodles.

Good suggestions! However, its interesting that you think its closely related to poverty...... I'm not saying this is always the case but there is a girl in my son's class. She is 8 and clearly obese and so are her Mum, Dad and brother. They seem to be eating out like nearly every weekend and do not appear to be living in poverty I can tell you!

So did you confront them about how they are abusing their child?

amselby81

I get sooooo upset with rude comments about overweight children as its a subject close to my heart . . . . . . . . . . . . .

As you can all see I am not fat but have previously been fat. I have worked sooo hard, eat well and exercise nearly everyday setting my family a good example.

My 11 year old son is a whole other kettle of fish.

I introduce to you my 11 year old son, well my whole family in fact.



He is over weight and nomatter what we seem to do I cant seem to get him to loose weight . . . . . . . .

1) we take him to play at the park, ice skating, badminton etc regularly.
2) he eats what we eat
3) we limit treats to just one per day, be it a packet of crisps, a buscuit or chocolate. Not one of each, just one of the selection.

The problems . . . . . . . . . .

1) he has behavoiral and socialising problems
2) getting him out the house can take two hours of arguing
3) in new activities he will just cause problems/refuse to join in/ruin it for all, if it something he doesnt want to do like when we have tried many physical activities such as kung fu irregardless of harsh punishment
4) I think he is sneaking down stairs and sneaking food. Not crisps or chocolates because they are very limited in the house but bread and sauces and bowls of cerals etc . . . . . .
5) because he has no friends he has no one to play out with extra to the phyical activities we take him to do.

I find it sooo difficult with him, I try so hard to get him to move, feed him good and healthy foods (nothing fried, no take aways, all home cooked from scratch), limit treats and set a very good example. He is under a specialist and on medication, which makes his weight matters worse.

I wish people would stop taring the parents of overwweight children with the same brush.

Rant over. Sorry.

In my opinion, your son doesn't look fat. Maybe he's a little husky, but he looks healthy. And since he's active and eating right, he'll probably thin out a bunch once he hits a growth spurt. I'm really sorry if you feel like these posts about obese children are directed towards you son. But when I think of obese children, I think of children that are bigger than your son.

21June

I didn't read through this entire thread, but I'm really disheartened and upset but how judgmental and just generally mean people can be in a place where I would think people would have some basic human empathy.

First of all, obesity - in adults and children - is VERY closely linked with poverty. We have a government that subsidizes the least healthy foods, funneling tax dollars into protecting the industries that made foods which are unhealthy and arguably physically addictive. Marketing companies target children direction. Stop assuming everybody's circumstances are the same as your own. They are not.

Also, CALLING KIDS FAT - in a forum where they can see it or not - DOES NOT MAKE THEM THINNER. It makes their food problems worse. I was not an overweight child and I can pinpoint the moment that my eating disorders started. I remember being weighed in class as a soul-crushing experience in the 4th grade, I remember being called "fat" as an insult amount children even though I was not, and I believed it. I had bulimia by high school. I was not an anomaly. Everyone in my generation has a terrible relationship with food.

We need to teach our children to be active and to eat healthy plant-based foods. Absolutely. But if you cloak this in the language of bad parenting, the language of judgements, the language of SHAME for people's bodies, YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM. Step back. If you REALLY want to address this problem, go to your local school and volunteer to run an athletics group for kids who feel uncomfortable in traditional athletics. Get these kids moving. Donate HEALTHY FOODS to a local food back, not your leftover ramen noodles.

Good suggestions! However, its interesting that you think its closely related to poverty...... I'm not saying this is always the case but there is a girl in my son's class. She is 8 and clearly obese and so are her Mum, Dad and brother. They seem to be eating out like nearly every weekend and do not appear to be living in poverty I can tell you!

So did you confront them about how they are abusing their child?

No, not when the girl is in my son's class and they seem rather popular (not sure why but then I suppose its a question of people's lack of knowledge of the effects of being overweight /obese). Would you? I don't think that fellow Mums think it is child abuse!!!