"I don't want to be too thin" - a "fat" people thing to say?
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For me, "I don't want to be too thin" means that I dont want the rest of my body to look like a skeleton when I have finally burned all the fat off my stomach. I am 5ft 3, 138lbs and my legs, feet, arms, neck, well everything but my stomach, look too thin! My goal weight is 125 and that's a healthy weight for me but I can't stand the thought of the rest of me being thinner. My ankles and knees already hurt when I lie on my side and the bones touch, my tailbone is killing me because I've lost fat off my butt and that makes biking difficult and my collarbone looks like it did when I was anorexic soooo, it's not like I'm fat and can't 'get' skinny, I just don't want to look skinny. There is a big difference between SKINNY and healthy looking. I'm hoping that as I do more lifting, my body will fill out some but it's not going to do a thing where all these bones are sticking out. I guess I'll find out when I reach goal.
I hope that clears things up for you, from my perspective anyway.
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I've said that at the start of my journey because I wouldn't feel comfortable being that way. Its not that I couldn't do it...I''ve found recently I can do anything i put my mind too.
For me personally I would prefer to be slightly bigger. IE a UK size 14/16 then an 8-10. Its a very personal choice and I think you're over analysing what people say. Everyone finds different sizes attractive so would obviously have different goals for themselves whilst changing their body.0 -
I don't want to be skinny or thin...I want to be fit!0
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"Too thin," just means thin to the point where it's unhealthy to me. Just like "too fat."
i.e too thin would be about 105 for me (i'm 5'7"). It doesn't really have to do with what I can achieve because if I wanted to achieve a goal that low, I COULD. I just think it's absurd to want that because it simply isn't healthy. Just like settling for 160 pounds would be. Because that's still considered overweight (even taking into account things other than scale weight).0 -
I was quite thin up until my mid-20s, and don't want to be there again.
I'm about 20 pounds heavier than I was in 1998. I think I look better now, except that I wore some padding in the chest in '98 that I didn't wear this time.
But I get what you're saying. It's even more prevalent with weight lifting. "I don't want to get too muscular," as if one just accidentally ends up looking like a bodybuilder.0 -
I can't speak for others, everyone has their own aesthetic preferences and I think that's totally okay as long as they're not being derogatory towards other peoples' body types, but I don't particularly want to be thin. Mostly because I don't think 'I want to be thin' is a healthy goal for me personally - I'm prone to extremes and I think I'd wind up pushing it too far and making myself miserable in the process - but also because truth be told I quite like my body already. I've always had an hourglass figure, when I slim down I'd ideally want to keep that. Just a little bit trimmer and with a lot more energy. For me 'too thin' would be losing all of my curves.0
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I just don't want too many bones protruding, I'd kinda still like to have a little 'pudge' not massive, just a little something to grab I guess. I noticed someone mentioned people who think a little bit of fat = curves. Well I guess I'm an idiot? But I want curves, which I already have! Just need to lose the weight to show them off a bit more. I do like the 'thin' body, but it's just not how I want to see myself. Slightly busty curvy red head :P, but healthy weight is what I'm aiming for!
"Curvy" is a body shape, not a size. There is a difference between being overweight and having curves. If you are a pear or an hourglass, you will have curves at any weight.0 -
"too thin" to me means an unhealthy thinness. There is actually a level where it becomes just as medically unhealthy to be thin as to be overweight. I know this is easy for me to say since I don't face this issue, but I'd rather be too thin and have to over eat my way to healthiness than my current situation although I seriously doubt the solution to being too thin is more cookies and cupcakes like I would dream of.
I've noticed that a lot of people mention the 'too thin' thing a LONG way off of being near a BMI of 18.5 though.
I don't quite get why you'd even mention it until you thought you might be in danger of being 'too thin'
Not me. I'm aiming for a BMI of 19 personally. I mean people who are bigger than I was before I even started trying to lose weight (140lb) saying that they are a worried about being too thin when they've got miles before getting to the unhealthy too thin stage.0 -
I don't understand why fat people feel they are allowed to tell healthy people they are 'too thin'.
I know, right?
Fat people are always complaining that other people are mean to them, that society is horrible to them etc.
Yet, since I've been dieting and frequenting fitness boards like this, I've seen fat women be 100 times meaner to thin women than I have ever seen a thin woman be to a fat woman. It's pretty hypocritical.
They'll say ridiculous crap like "real women have curves" (um, no, real women come in all shapes and sizes you moron) and assume all thin women are anorexic and unhealthy. Most people, in the USA anyway, are so fat that they literally have no idea what "too thin" really means.
I did the math and to be considered "underweight" at my height, I'd have to weigh 108 lbs. In my profile picture, I weighed around 135, to give you an idea. I don't think I look fat in my profile pic. I don't look thin in my profile pic either but imagine if I was 27 lbs lighter in it. I'd probably be a twig but still be considered a healthy weight.
There is a lot of hate and cruelty towards thin women nowadays and I am really sick of it.0 -
being too thin is not healthy and does not look good on most people. I have said this before. I have a small frame, I am 5'4 and 124. But if I lost 10 more pounds, I would be too thin, in my opinion. there would be nothing left of me0
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I think that if you haven't been there, you don't know what goes through the heavier person's mind.
I'm 5'4", and way back when, I used to be the girl who was so tiny that I didn't need to pick up anything for myself lol! "No dear, that's to heavy, I'll carry that for you!" I was a size 6/8 with a 24 inch waist, approximately 118-125 lb. (I have a moderate build).
It's been so long that the memory of that time is fading in my mind. I pick up my daughter's clothing when doing the laundry and marvel that I used to wear that size, it seems so impossible that I did! There is also an element of fear, too, because we are used to not feeling attractive and either receiving glances of horror or being ignored altogether. Oh no, what if we get noticed! How would we react? Also, the excess skin issue is a fear. But please be understanding of us. We have to understand you, so please be understanding what we are going through right now. We're just happy that we can lose weight and be healthy so we can live to see our children grow up. Cut us some slack. We need someone to cheer us on!0 -
Hi!
Just something I overheard the other day that got me thinking. Usually larger people saying that they don't want to be "too thin" or "skinny".
In my opinion both of those terms are relative so one person views skinny as 5'5 110lbs person and another may say that the 5'5 girl is skinny at 120.
So when you say "I don't want to be skinny/too thin" what are you implying? Are you saying you don't find thin attractive or are you simply saying it because you don't believe you can reach a certain weight or is it just an excuse? Like you're heavy and you'd probably like to be that weight but are too lazy to actually work for it?
I don't mean to offend anyone. When I say I don't want to be skinny I mean under 120 (I'm 5'4) and at that weight I have hip bones jutting out and don't look healthy in my eyes.
This usually comes from two camps:
1. Women who have never been a healthy weight and so can't imagine themselves at one and
2. Women who think fat = curves.
I think that losing weight is very, very hard. It takes a special kind of person to get the weight off and keep it off. So, that being said, if you are skinny, why do you care what a larger lady says to make herself feel better? Some people may not have the self esteem that you have to have to be confident enough to say "I want to be too skinny!" Or maybe they just don't, would someone say "I don't want to be to fat" is a skinny thing? The bottom line is, we are here to support each other, not to tear down, right? Have a great day!!
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For me it was totally an excuse to not try my hardest.
^^ this0 -
I've never really said I don't want to be too thin/skinny but it's true I don't. I don't want to go from one extreme to the other. I want to be healthy for the first time in a decade.
I've been the same height since 12-13 when I starte gaining weight, and when I was 126 I always felt right in my skin.
To me that's ideal but I didn't have boobs then. I didn't develop till I was 14 or so. So I'd have I take that into account and say 130ish would be good. I've set my goal for 140 now as that is halving my body weight. Once that's reached I'll alter my goal down a little more to where I think I should be (bang in the middle of the good BMI with any luck)0 -
I have said this, too thin for me is 116 pounds at 5'5" which I have been before however my favourite weight was 126 pounds, I still had "curves" but felt slim and got lots of compliments where as the first weight got me concern. I think 126 is a really pleasing looking weight on my frame so that's what I would mean by not getting too thin, however I've seen girls on here taller than me with that weight who still have boobs and look great. It is all relative. 0
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I had that same feeling when I weighed 270. I thought 230 was going to be my goal, and it was for a while, then I accepted myself as heavy at 230 and my new goal is 195 (which for me brings me into "normal" BMI range).
In my case, I don't honestly think it was laziness. With that much weight to go, I started out trying to lose down into a normal BMI quickly, and my relationship with food became unhealthy. I started fasting, and looking at fad "one food" diets. When I backed my goal off to a weight I had remembered as feeling very healthy, it made the whole thing more approachable.
For me, "I don't want to be too thin" was a failsafe that kept me out of a very close call with an eating disorder.
Each person to their own pace, and their own goals. As long as they are judging themselves, and not you, they are traveling their own journey.0 -
It's interesting reading everyone's views!
At 23 I was 8 stone (112 pounds) I am 5 foot 10 and looking at my wedding photos, there's nothing of me! I ate like a horse, did lots of hill walking and caving and was seldom ill. I look healthy but my wrists look like bones. I wouldn't have called myself ''too thin'' then.
20 years and 4 children later I weighed 12 stone (168 pounds) and felt awful, looked permanently 6 months pregnant and felt like I was wading through mud all the time. I also started to have high blood pressure.
I have lost 14 pounds but would like to lose 14 more. One online weight calculator said that my ideal weight was as low as 9 stone (126 pounds) which seems ridiculous.
I'm now 47 and would not want to be 112 pounds again, I'd look like a head on a stick! But I think 140 is realistic for a middle aged woman!0 -
Focus on body fat percentage -- not weight, since that includes not only fat but muscle, nerves, bone, cartilage, tendons, water, digestive tract, organs, etc.
I'd reword the phrase "I don't want to be too thin" as "I want to lose a lot of body fat but I don't want to lose too much lean body mass."0 -
I don't understand why fat people feel they are allowed to tell healthy people they are 'too thin'.
I agree.
I know some heavy women who go on about "skinny b****es" and "real women have curves" etc and that's where I think a lot of the talk of "too skinny" is coming from.0 -
for me-because I have said those exact words-it was not believing i could actually get to the point of being skinny and using it as an excuse...like it gets so much harder to lose weight the closer to your goal, so maybe i will just give up and instead of admitting that its because i don't feel like trying harder, i'll say its because i don't want to be too skinny.0
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For me it was totally an excuse to not try my hardest.
^Yep! Same.0 -
I used to say things like this. For me it was pure ignorance and a way to try and trick myself into believing that I was not as over weight and out of shape as I actually was.
My new mantra is "I want to do that!". Maybe I can, maybe I can't but I will try anything!0 -
I'm a fat person who cannot wait for the day when someone tells me I'm too thin. That would be the ultimate compliment.0
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Actually, that wasn't something I said when I was overweight. I never thought it was even a possibility when I started!
But, as I started to lose weight, I started hearing comments that let me know people were worried...don't get too skinny, etc.. In a way, it irritated me because I'm at a perfectly healthy weight, but I also appreciated their concern. When they look at me, they don't see the fat that's left. They see the fat that's gone. They see me compared to a society full of overweight people.
Unlike them, I was only seeing the fat that's still there and I don't want to fall into the trap of never being satisfied. In my eyes, I can still stand to lose 5 lbs or so and I'd like it to be off my thighs and belly in the hopes of having the "perfect" (well, as perfect as I'm going to get after 3 babies!) body.
Nevermind that I wear a size 4 or 6 and have no guarantee that that 5 lbs. is actually going to come from where I want it to. It might be that that last 5 lbs is going to send me over the "too thin" line, which will make matters worse instead of better.
The fact is that I don't want to be too thin and I don't want to be obsessed with my body. At 36, I don't need to have the body of a 20 year old. I need to be an example to my kids that you can enjoy life and be healthy at the same time without selling your soul for "perfection". So, I choose to be happy with being healthy and accept my body with all of its imperfections.0 -
I'm a fat person who cannot wait for the day when someone tells me I'm too thin. That would be the ultimate compliment.
I hope that you get your wish!
But, in the meantime, please keep in mind that thin people usually don't like it.0 -
'Too thin' for me is when my face starts to look gaunt. I was pretty thin for me about 10 years ago, and my colleagues at the time told me I'd lost too much weight. I'm never going to be skinny because I have an hourglass figure, so my boobs and hips will always be a bit bigger.
I'm 34 now and have 2 children, but my clothes from 10 years ago (yeah, i kept them lol) are starting to fit me again.
I work out a lot more now with weights, and I have a personal trainer, so I have more muscle mass than I did back then, and I'm more toned. My BMI then was 22, but I think when I get back to the same size as I was, my BMI this time will be higher.0 -
Sex is also more comfortable when i have some meat on my bones as well, which is my biggest motivator for losing weight to begin with.
We have a winner!0 -
I think this comes from many places, each individual to the person. Here are some I've encountered.
a) I have a friend who is in recovery from an eating disorder (I think that's how you say it). In the process, she gained a lot of weight partially because her metabolism was out of whack from all the up and down she put her body through. She is now overweight and uncomfortable with it and told me recently that she wanted to lose weight but reassured me that she didn't want to get "too skinny." In that case I think she was just trying to let me know that she wasn't going to go back to 98 pounds (and thus the hospital).
b) My husband is not attracted to stick-thin models. He finds them disgusting. He will often say "look at her, she has twig arms!" When I started working out and dieting, he asked me (not in a mean way) to not loose too much weight or "get too thin." He's simply not attracted to it. I assured him that with my body type it would be extremely hard to pull that off anyway and that it wasn't my goal.
I think a lot of people fall somewhere into b - they either don't find the really, really thin thing attractive OR, on the flip-side, they aren't capable of reaching it.
My brain is mush this morning... I had 2 other examples when I started and now I can't think of them :P Oh well, if I remember I'll add later.0 -
Id love people to think I was too thin0
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I've never been overweight, quite the opposite, in fact, so when I say it, I just mean I don't want to get back to 98 pounds at 5'5" and looking like a stick figure. I'm loving that I finally have curves and all I had to do was gain weight and drop body fat.0
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