The 2 sides to MFP

jericamom

I explained that the ethic on MFP was that nobody judges and that everyone is equal including the very overweight - motivating stuff!

Ha! Good one!

postrockandcats

Any community is going to have it's different facets. MFP is no different. The social aspect is what keeps using this site interesting for me, regardless of the posts that I don't like. If it's not a topic that interests me, I don't worry about it. If your friend isn't going to join because some people post in messages that aren't centered around his values then that's on him and not on the site.

Martucha123

There are people here who either have a fake profile and pictures, and are not here to lose weight and treat MFP as a dating site.

When I see a guy with a muscular trimmed body and a lot of "friends" - it makes my wonder if its really him, or he really looks like me and is just collecting groupies.

You serious?? You have a computer generated avatar and you're calling people out for fake pics?

I have a muscular body that I earned using MFP. That's why I have no problem showing it here. The site works if you use it. If you wanna sit around and assume everyone in better shape than you is just lying.. well that's pathetic is what it is.

this

_Wits_

*shaking my head*

It's Chit Chat... it's MYfitnesspal...you make of the website what you want and need. Others are not shallow or lacking conviction to better themselves because they joke around with people on the forums.

I'm so tired of reading stuff like this....OP, I get what you are saying and can see how someone could perceive it the wrong way when perusing the site for the first time, but the comments following...wow.

I'm on Chit Chat all the time. I'm also down 50 lbs. I also have over a dozen mfp friends I've met in person that have completely been part of me changing my life. My FL is also full of fellow Chit Chatters and they are some of the most amazing people. Most people who are friends with them figure that out when they don't jump to conclusions.

Just some food for thought before many people characterize people they don't know based on a forum post or thread title. Fitness isn't all about calories and exercise. It's mind, body, and soul. It's how you live your life, how you treat others, how you treat yourself, what you find joy in, what makes you laugh...it's one big whole package. Some may not see it that way, but many do and it's sad that people find this to be "attention whoring" or "shallow".

twinmom14ek

I understand what you're saying, and I agree that there are a lot of threads that are shallow, superficial, and silly at best. I'm a little sad that they might turn people off to an otherwise great tool for managing one's health and meeting like-minded people. That said, I do think that the number of members who have successfully used the tools and gotten to a place where they feel comfortable subjecting themselves to the honest opinions of others reflects positively on what can be accomplished.

I started using MFP strictly for the calorie counter function. It wasn't until well into my second (or third or fourth...who's counting) attempt at weight loss using the site that I ventured into the Community section. I enjoy it for a multitude of reasons, including the support that members provide one another. I've gotten great information on how to look at calorie intakes and weight loss, and even recipes for the upcoming football season. Think of those as the MFP version of tv news/documentaries/educational programming. Sure, they're great, but sometimes you just want to veg out in front of some crappy reality show--enter the chit-chat topics. Members post there as a fun way to interact with one another beyond diet and fitness, and I believe this speaks volumes to how involved, committed, and interactive the community is. Your friend list wants to hang out even when they don't have any specific fitness topics to discuss.

Yes, there are plenty of shallow threads out there. But when you read through most of them, there very few posters who are intentionally malicious and put others down. In my experience, if someone wants to post on the "Cutest thing about the person above you" thread, people are overwhelmingly kind and supportive. And almost every time I've seen someone post a true problem, looking for guidance, there is an abundance of responses from people who may not have the answer, but just want to let the poster know that they're not alone. I know this is what you were referring to in your praise of the site, and that's what I hope your friend can find here. We all have to filter out negative things in our everyday lives--MFP is just a microcosm of that world. It has good and bad, but if you're looking for the good, it's not hard to find.

TriumphNow

Tell him to come back and stay away for the negative forums and forums totally unrelated to weight loss. He should really look at success stories. Those have always been the main reason I even look at the message boards. They are so inspirational and encouraging. They helped me a lot when I first started on MFP. I hope he doesn't give up. If you stay away from the drama, this site is fantastic and a wonderful tool. Also, connect him with some of the pals that you find really helpful.

Wonderob

wtf is wrong with you OP??
and others.

so if somebody came here went from fat to ripped they have to leave the page cose they are too good looking now?
this is chit chat section it supposed to be for fun
and yes, we are getting hotter in the process so we feel sexier so we want to rate and be rated
what is wrong with that?

it's not myfatpal it's myfitnesspal for people who want to get fit and SURPRISE for people who are fit

I was waiting for someone to get all indignant. I think you're missing my point. Who said only fat people can go on MFP? Who said you can't be fit and go on here? Who said you can't have fun on the chit chat section?

Why do you think there is something wrong with me for pointing out the difference between the mentality of those on the main groups and those on the 'rate me' threads?

oh so I'm free to post whatever I want but as long as you approve and it's within mentality defined by ... you

No, I made it clear that everyone of course can post what they want and I subscribe to the view that if I don't like it, I don't look.

withabandon

I prefer the MFP tool for logging calories but I can think of at least one other site similar to this that has EXCELLENT support forums. To be truthful, I mostly stick to my calorie counter and my friends list and rarely venture into the forums for the reasons why your friend was turned off - it really doesn't follow with my motivation, which was not because I was disgusted with how I looked or because I wanted to look better - but was the motivation of taking care of myself in the way that I deserve to be taken care of. Developing some self worth was the easiest way to do this, and when people ask me how I have done this so far, I usually answer "by loving myself" - because that was truly the first step. I have lost before based on negative self image and ended up stopping before this and gaining back. Why the heck would you do something good for someone you hate over the long term?

I am just a little over halfway to losing 144lbs - if he joins and is looking for a non judgemental friend who would like to support him, send him my way!

ToughTulip

wtf is wrong with you OP??
and others.

so if somebody came here went from fat to ripped they have to leave the page cose they are too good looking now?
this is chit chat section it supposed to be for fun
and yes, we are getting hotter in the process so we feel sexier so we want to rate and be rated
what is wrong with that?

it's not myfatpal it's myfitnesspal for people who want to get fit and SURPRISE for people who are fit

I was waiting for someone to get all indignant. I think you're missing my point. Who said only fat people can go on MFP? Who said you can't be fit and go on here? Who said you can't have fun on the chit chat section?

Why do you think there is something wrong with me for pointing out the difference between the mentality of those on the main groups and those on the 'rate me' threads?

oh so I'm free to post whatever I want but as long as you approve and it's within mentality defined by ... you

reread the last sentence of the original post.

You are over reacting and misunderstanding.

odusgolp

OP... I blame you for telling him MFP is all sunshine and roses in the first place. And for claiming the chit chat forum DEVALUES MFP. You, sir, are ridiculous for missing... reality.

Thomasm198

A few nights ago there was a thread asking for suggestions for new forum topics. Perhaps these topics can be grouped together into one group?. That way we can find them but they arent overwhelmingly and blatantly the identity of MFP.

There is. It's called "Chit chat fun and games"

slim_photographer

"all we are saying is give peace a chance"
and
"can we all just get along?"
come to mind :ohwell:

Sidesteal

It's a valid point.

Clearly the solution is that we need more threads judging women, so your male friend feels better.





Seriously though, I didn't even go into the chit-chat section for several months of being on MFP and you're right, it's a totally different ballgame than the main forums.

But, since it's intended as an off-topic section, I don't really see a problem with it.

jenbit

There are people here who either have a fake profile and pictures, and are not here to lose weight and treat MFP as a dating site.

When I see a guy with a muscular trimmed body and a lot of "friends" - it makes my wonder if its really him, or he really looks like me and is just collecting groupies.

You serious?? You have a computer generated avatar and you're calling people out for fake pics?

I have a muscular body that I earned using MFP. That's why I have no problem showing it here. The site works if you use it. If you wanna sit around and assume everyone in better shape than you is just lying.. well that's pathetic is what it is.

You know ^^ he is right.. Some of us have a sense of humor and enjoy joking with others. Some people actually reach thier goals on here and of course they want to show off their hard work.. I for one enjoy the pics of everyones progress and it has helped motivate me whenever I needed that extra push

Nysie5

so sorry to hear your friend stopped becasue of this, stinks that MFP has changed to this, im here to lose weight, not **** around, plenty of other sites for that mess... just saying

vjrose

I think you should convince him to come back, get a few of your friends to friend him and he's off and running, tell him to just stay away from Chit Chat, I do, lol. That area is the FB of MFP, lol, drama and all.

rudimae

Why did he go straight to the chit-chat part and not the motivation and support, success stories, fitness and exercise, or introduction sections?

Just speaking for myself of course, but I’m not here for chit-chat. Of course conversation and inspiration are welcome. But I’m here to help get healthy and hopefully lose more weight.

If your friend is put off by the least relevant section of the forum, then perhaps he is just not ready to be here? Not saying that’s the case, but I’m just wondering if it wasn’t a good excuse for him to decide this place wasn’t for him.

As a person who is very over weight, I know I made excuses as to why things wouldn’t work to help me. They were all excuses, but I wanted to be convinced so I was.

Hopefully, he’ll give it a chance!

hopeful_heather

i totally agree. i just try to ignore it and stay away from it. cant expect everyone to have the same values as you do. but there really is a lot of good about this site. just stay away from the chit chat section.

T_R_A_V

I agree....click on the health/fitness threads stay the hell out of the chit chat fun and games

Sorry its not 100% business all the time...but **** some people are bored at work at times and it passes the day

And if you were embarassed over something that petty....gosh Im scared if somethign big happens

felice03

I prefer to sit around all day with a stick up my tushie instead of going into Chit Chat...