The 2 sides to MFP
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I've long wished the chit chat section was a group that one had to opt into....sigh.0
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You cant get mad at an entire website because at that very moment most of the people logged on were responding to chit chat threads. If you want to hear the symphony of the fit happy people posting in all the info forums without a sad panda face or rage muffin in their hand- you got find us in those threads early in the morning before all the complainers spend hours trying to break our spirit and everyone gets all troll-y.
As is usual on here, things have escalated into an Internet brawl
I didn't get 'mad at an Internet website', I just said "It's a shame that he was put off by his first impression"
I still think it's a shame - not advocating change, not saying anybody is wrong or right, not getting mad, just think it's a shame
escalated into a brawl?
how did I make this a fight? what did I do?? Im not even mad. Why are you upset at me???
I was telling you the best time to see all the posters here at their very best!!!!!! i didnt even say YOU were mad at a whole website- i just said you cant -
nevermind
I didnt do anything wrong - Im just gonna leave. Im not sure how I hurt you but I apologize for trying to give some perspective.0 -
When I see a guy with a muscular trimmed body and a lot of "friends" - it makes my wonder if its really him, or he really looks like me and is just collecting groupies.
Especially when 95% or more of his friends are females with profile pictures showing off their new hot body.0 -
your buddy goes to the obviously labeled nonsense catagories and is all disappointed when he finds nonsense?!?!? expecting people who devote a fair amount of their time and effort into their weight loss and fitness to talk about nothing but calories and fitness regimens is unrealistic and that's a lot of emotional baggage to expect the rest of the world to tip toe around.0
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I've long wished the chit chat section was a group that one had to opt into....sigh.
If you don't like it, don't use it. Simple.0 -
PS btw its your EYEBALLS that filter out the chit chat threads on the recent posts. Thank goodness for learning and reading comprehension that comes with being an adult. If you dont want to play a game, you dont have to ban it from school grounds- just ignore the kids currently at recess.0
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Neither have I, hope you persuade him back for a peek hereI don't think I've ever read a post from chit chat. I hope you can convince your friend to check out MFP one more time. Show him this post!
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I avoid those threads for the most part too. But hey, attention-*kitten* will do what they do. They gotta feed somehow, right? lol0
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Why is it that anytime something like this is brought up everybody gets defensive?
I didn't went through all the replies but seriously, the guy just wanted to show his a bit of insecure friend that this is a good supportive site. If anyone thinks that the chi-chat section isn't out of control with hormones then they're clearly blind. And yes, while I myself do participate in those areas myself, doesn't mean that I like the fact that about 95% of the posts are related to sex.
Yes, I understand fitness increases want for sex and everything and that a lot of us are working hard to get the body to make the opposite (in some cases, same) sex weak in the knees but this is chit-chat section, not "Hey, do I look do-able?" section.
@OP. Sadly, this is what it is. These same folks you talked about are going to get defensive about things which is a shame. I personally try to find good motivating friends. Some of my friends in the past have done nothing but talked about sex and stuff and I have deleted them. I don't mind them doing it but I do mind seeing those kinds of posts on my feed but if that is all you can talk about on a fitness site, then you belong to the forums of an adult site, not on my friends list.0 -
The problem isn't those threads, or topics, or that they get so much play on MFP...the problem is that someone made the "effort" to log into MFP, found those threads, then got discouraged. It has nothing to do with the threads themselves, nor does it have anything to do with those who participated in those threads, the problem lays squarely on the shoulders of the person who got upset about them.
Self conscience or not, if you're going to let something that was posted on the internet, in a section you never have to visit unless you want to visit, if you let that deter you...then you weren't serious to begin with. I have met and know too many people with the "I can't" or "I tried, but it didn't work for me" attitude that want to complain and whine about their weight or situation, but never want to do anything about it that goes beyond taking some magic pill. The only true motivation a person needs is themselves, because without first believing in yourself, you won't believe what anyone else says either. You need to want to be motivated or else it's all in vain.
Veteran: You want to read the forum?
Noob: I think I'm entitled.
Veteran: You want to read the forums?
Noob: I want motivation!!
Veteran: You CAN'T HANDLE THE MOTIVATION!! We live on a site that has fit people. And most of those fit people have worked hard to get where they are. They want to be known as sexy! Who's gonna tell them their sexy? You? They have a greater opinion of themselves than you can possibly imagine...they worked hard to get where they are. The cried, they poured sweat, they fasted, they ate more to weigh less, they cut calories. The truth is, they know their BMR and their TDEE, they know the dedication it takes to lose 100 lbs and feel good about who they are. You don't want the motivation, because deep down you know those magic pill infomercials are solid crap, and you want ripped, you NEED ripped abs, and you know there's only one way to get them. Those Chit-Chat people use words like sexy, cute, hotness because they've earned it. You use them as way to cop out. They neither have the time, nor the inclination to put forth effort to help motivate someone who is looking for an excuse to stay un-motivated. They would rather you log out and move on. Otherwise, I suggest you dig deep down, realize that you want to lose the weight, find the motivational threads, log your calories, lift some weights and jump on a treadmill and thank MFP for allowing me to be accountable to myself and to others.
When you decide to get serious about something, then you will let nothing stand in the way of your goal.
If you believe you can't do something, then you're probably right.
Post on Mr. and Mrs. Hotness, keep those threads going Ms. Firm Butt and Mr. Cut Abs... because one day, one day soon...I will be among you....oh yes...one day MFP will be writing long blogs about my awesomeness, but for the time being, I will toot my own horn, because I am worthy of some tootage! Ok...not sure that came out as good in print as it did in my head.
Edited to say that I apparently am WAY bored at work and need to find something to do.
I like this guy. I give him a 12.0 -
It does seem a failry sensible solution to take chit chat feeds out of the recent posts. It is the most active area like you say and will come up first and it does figure that a newbie would click straight there and, being at the beginning of a weightloss journey and therefore perhaps overly sensitive to these types of feeds, would become discouraged.
They could easily make their way to it alone later via the "chitchat and fun" thread but it just wouldn't be their very first impression.
Everyone who wants to post there still can do so happily. Sounds a good response to me. Maybe you should put it to the website suggestion thread?
I have seen many good suggestions go without a response from the admins & moderators. Perhaps because it is not a board clicked on often by members, and never gets enough hits to last in the RECENT TOPICS section.
Got to love the irony of that one! :laugh:0 -
It's a judgement free zone... for women.
This is an unfortunate problem. IMO, the "Recent Forums" topics that comes up in your HOME PAGE should be free of the Chit-Chat section by default. It's not enough to avoid clicking, since the topics are inserted into your home page.
Or, you could advise him just to use the mobile apps, which don't do that.
That's true, it is judgment free for women--unless you show more cleavage than Sally or Jim Bob thinks is ok, shop in the wrong section of the store, don't eat your exercise calories, are too skinny, too fat, a heavy lifter, skinny fat, or are too prudish to show cleavage. Oh, wait.
It's pretty easy to not pay attention to the recent forum posts on your webpage. I couldn't even remember what people were referring to until I went to check it out.
Though0 -
Neither have I, hope you persuade him back for a peek hereI don't think I've ever read a post from chit chat. I hope you can convince your friend to check out MFP one more time. Show him this post!
I hope he comes back, but I also hope he never sees this thread. Lots of meanies out today!0 -
I simply say...thank goodness there are so many sides to MFP. It's big enough for us to all have our own little playground.0
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I've long wished the chit chat section was a group that one had to opt into....sigh.
If you don't like it, don't use it. Simple.PS btw its your EYEBALLS that filter out the chit chat threads on the recent posts. Thank goodness for learning and reading comprehension that comes with being an adult. If you dont want to play a game, you dont have to ban it from school grounds- just ignore the kids currently at recess.
For some reason I don't understand these simple and effective guidelines aren't enough for some people.
"If I don't like it it should be BANNED!!"
Lighten up. Let go of your insane control issues. Stop reading things you don't like and complaining they exist. The gun is in your hand.0 -
One Celebrates while the other becomes even more insecure....0
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I really don't have time or the energy to read all the pages on this, but I can imagine there is a bit of clash between both sides on this issue. Personally, I totally get both sides on this one. I can see how someone with a lot of weight to lose could get discouraged if that is one of their first impressions of the site. I also like to have fun and enjoy some of the threads in the chit chat forum, although the rating threads are just stupid in my opinion.
So if I were in charge of this site, I would either exclude the chit chat posts from the Recent Posts query or elminate the Recent Posts query altogether. Chances are someone just joining the site is not going to start off by clicking the chit-chat board before the others.
Sums up how I feel
Just to re-itterate though - he clciked on Recent posts, I guess to see what people were talking about - seems it was mostly Tatum Channing and the like
It amazes me how many people just don't get your point.0 -
I was praising MFP to a friend the other day, explaining how good it was and how useful I had found it (He had noticed that I had lost weight and asked me about it), especially the support from everyone on these forums. He is very overweight and so self concious that he is reluctant to go to the gym, or even to weight watchers etc. I explained that the ethic on MFP was that nobody judges and that everyone is equal including the very overweight - motivating stuff!
It's a judgement free zone... for women.
This is an unfortunate problem. IMO, the "Recent Forums" topics that comes up in your HOME PAGE should be free of the Chit-Chat section by default. It's not enough to avoid clicking, since the topics are inserted into your home page.
Or, you could advise him just to use the mobile apps, which don't do that.
I agree with this...
Click RECENT POSTS... and most that come up are these "chi-chats".
I'm not saying to get rid of the chit-chat (although, if it was my site I wouldn't have it), just put it to the side somehow. Because the main focus of the sit is fitness, but the chit-chat has overtaken then when you see it overwhelming the RECENT POSTS.
I can understand why you friend clicked on them. If I was led to the site by someone and was just looking around, I probably would click on Recent Posts and ... well... we see what comes up.0 -
This forum is full of annoying people. How could it not be? It's an extremely popular site and a topic like weight loss is going to attract a wide cross section of people, not just the exact kind of people you or me or anyone in particular specifically relates to.
The forum is also full of awesome, friendly, amazingly helpful people and if you want to get the most out of them, you can choose who you interact with and what threads you participate in. If your friend is interested he can find a few people he likes, add them as friends and ignore the threads that bother him. Heck, he can even use the ignore function liberally so he doesn't even see posts by people he doesn't like. I do this. I ignore people all the godd*mn time on here, and it really has improved my experience to block out the rude ones.
You can't expect an extremely popular internet site to be a perfectly curated set of people who suit your preferences. You can, however, use it in such a way that it's helpful to you. Or not, your call.0 -
I've been on weight loss sites previously and I've seen chit-chat subforums that are actually useful but this one is really just full of junk. I think ignoring chit-chat is the best way to go.0
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I've long wished the chit chat section was a group that one had to opt into....sigh.
If you don't like it, don't use it. Simple.PS btw its your EYEBALLS that filter out the chit chat threads on the recent posts. Thank goodness for learning and reading comprehension that comes with being an adult. If you dont want to play a game, you dont have to ban it from school grounds- just ignore the kids currently at recess.
For some reason I don't understand these simple and effective guidelines aren't enough for some people.
"If I don't like it it should be BANNED!!"
Lighten up. Let go of your insane control issues. Stop reading things you don't like and complaining they exist. The gun is in your hand.
Shush with you and your logic Mr. Muscles!0 -
ROLF! its only funny cause is true i just came back after being gone 6 months and is pretty much the first thing i saw rate person above you sexy blah blah.. and idc tbh cause a little fun here and there is fine with me... but not when its all i see -.-.. not just that the first post i open up.. well lets just say WOW.. a lot of females (1 or 2 males too)picking on one lady.. .. it was pretty sad.. sad trolls gunna fail troll... it was bad... .. >.>0
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I simply say...thank goodness there are so many sides to MFP. It's big enough for us to all have our own little playground.
but.....I don't like "their" playground so we must destroy it!0 -
I typically stay away from those threads. That's not why I am on MFP. I get out of it what I put into it. Continue to encourage your friend and for him to find supportive friends. I have a great network of friends that are supportive of everyone and I've never seen any of them bash someone in the forums. I would be glad to friend him and give him support.0
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I say this sincerely and without judgment for your friend--honestly. If he is offended by the posts he saw in the recent topics, this really may not be the site for him. People do have fun throughout the board. But likely the only sites he would be happy with then are very conservative or 100% focused sites with no chit chat section.
I don't think MFP is "associated" with the chit chat section to the majority of people. People who are turned off by the content and get offended by it may associate it that way, but then it isn't the site for them, and that's ok. But MFP was rated one of the top 10 fitness apps last year, and I found the site myself through countless references to it and its awesomeness on another fitness site. I haven't been back to the other site, and I liked that one. MFP hooked me immediately, and like I said, I didn't even really notice the silliness. When I go to my homepage, what stands out to me the most are how many calories I have left and all my "diet tools" and friends.
In short, I don't think MFP needs to change. If you try to please all the people all the time, you're doomed to fail.0 -
I agree. Honestly, I think it should be a bit monitored. I understand people want to chit chat, but when you have posts like "how sexy" etc. on a site where a lot of people who are over weight, and don't FEEL sexy are... that's kinda discouraging. Who would want to join something when they already feel down, where it appears people are STILL judging your looks. Chit chat and word games and stuff like that is fine, but I think no one should be all about who's cute, who's sexy, and my biggest pet peeve is trying to hook up with people on the forums... it's not a dating site.0
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In short, I don't think MFP needs to change. If you try to please all the people all the time, you're doomed to fail.
Sometimes changes can be made that improve a site without upsetting the apple cart.0 -
The chit-chat sections is a place for people to have fun, blow off steam, joke around. So a lot of those thread titles, are just being being funny, and trying to lighten to mood up.
This.
We all get frustrated and stressed and sometimes things like this help take our minds off the seriousness....like I've always said: If you don't like it, don't read it.0 -
When I tell people to check out MFP I make sure to add: Don't waste your time with the Chit Chat section of the forums. And then I very candidly tell them why.
MFP itself is a great tool. The forums are a mixture of very good and very bad, depending on the day.
I do wish they had slightly stricter rules about what one can post, just to keep things slightly less immature but I can't see that happening.
Years and years ago the forums weren't like this. (I joined around 2009 originally. Lost that profile though.![:\](https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/resources/emoji/confused.png ":\")
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