Answering "How Did You Lose Weight? HELP
I am attending a huge conference next week and will get asked tons of times "how did you lose weight?" my normal answer is "mfp, eat right, exercise" but no one seems to believe it.
I want to give answers like "the new algerian pineapple diet" or "i married Jillian Michaels"
I am looking for creative ways to answer the question, I promise to use your responses, and I promise to do it with a straight face.
how would you answer the question??
I want to give answers like "the new algerian pineapple diet" or "i married Jillian Michaels"
I am looking for creative ways to answer the question, I promise to use your responses, and I promise to do it with a straight face.
how would you answer the question??
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Replies
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Tell them you ate a skinny person. Everyone knows you are what you eat.
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I just tell people the truth. Eating a healthier diet and working out.0
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I've only been asked once IRL and just said I started running.0
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Whatever the aliens did when they abducted me seems to have done it. :laugh:0
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The new "Las Vegas Diet" - Blackjack & Hookers0
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Tell them you ate a skinny person. Everyone knows you are what you eat.
Bwuahahaha! Good one!0 -
I got into black black and used it to send my extra weight to my ex.
He really has gained almost as much as I lost.0 -
Shakeology and Dr. Oz0
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I'm a shapeshifter.0
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Hookers and blow is always a funny response :P0
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The new "Las Vegas Diet" - Blackjack & Hookers
Don't forget the skiing part.0 -
You could always tell them that the years you spend running from the police sure helped! Then wink at them while slowly walking away....0
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Isn't it funny how noone believes you can lose weight by exercise and a healthy diet alone?
Blows my mind.0 -
The new "Las Vegas Diet" - Blackjack & Hookers
You forgot the blow man! That's an essential in the Las Vegas Diet.0 -
"I jump up and down on the spot for 2 minutes before each meal"0
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lose weight? what are you talking about I've always been this size. Oh wait you must be thinking about my twin.0
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I just tell people that I counted my calories on mfp and moved more. You're right, no one believes it. No one believes it because it isn't a "system", a product, a magic trick or anything like that. People don't want to believe that like............. you worked for it.0
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I used power tools to cut off limbs and belly fat...and they grew back without the added fat. #freshstart0
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Tell them you have no idea what they are talking about, you have always looked this good and maybe they have you confused with someone else.0
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I haven't eaten since February.0
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lose weight? what are you talking about I've always been this size. Oh wait you must be thinking about my twin.
LOL we think alike0 -
Cocaine.... ALL DAY Errday!0
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dedicated diet of coke and vodka0
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Tell 'em the Purina Dog Food Diet worked great for you until you stopped to scratch your ear in the middle of the street and got hit by a car.0
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Adipose
(any Doctor Who fan will get it, anyone else will go looking for a drug called Adipose)0 -
I just say "I ate less and exercised more..."
Some people say awesome, some people are disappointed with the answer because they want a quick, easy fix. Problem is, there is no quick, easy fix. If they ask for more details, I will give them, but I usually just stop with that answer.0 -
Lamb testicles.0
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Tell 'em the Purina Dog Food Diet worked great for you until you stopped to scratch your ear in the middle of the street and got hit by a car.0
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Based on your knowledge of the Algerian Pineapple diet and your recent marriage to Ms. Michaels (I hope her partner is ok with that) perhaps these other techniques might justify what healthy eating and exercise cannot.
- Use a loofah and scrub off the dead skin cells. They're extra weight, you know. O.o
- Chew each mouthful of food exactly 237 times. EACH mouthful of food, including ice cream and coffee. Think of all of the calories burned by all of that chewing!
- Avoid eating foods that come in primary colors. No red, yellow, or blue foods. (No magenta, yellow, or cyan if you're talking to a artists. Red, green, and blue if your audience is well versed in light.) Secondary colors are ok and tertiary colors are the most nutritious.
- Eating food in alphabetical order. This way, your body can process it better. Never eat zucchini before an apple. It'll get turned to fat almost immediately.
- Only eating what you can attach to piece of string attached to a stick attached to your head. It's the carrot on the stick diet. Works wonders, is a little weird in public and makes it impossible to enjoy soup.
Hope those suggestions are ridiculous enough.0 -
"I take a 17 pound dump twice a day, every day."0
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