Ex's - how long did it take you to get over yours?

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  • Charlie003
    Charlie003 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    The first love, I think part of you is lost forever. Each one after that a month tops.
  • MaritaD
    MaritaD Posts: 178 Member
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    It all depends on the situation. For me probably a couple months, though after a couple weeks I was furious with him I knew the anger meant I still had feelings. We were together 10 years, middle school sweethearts and had a baby together at 16. It was hard to break up but he didn't treat me good and I am so much happier now!! Our daughter is 10 and he see's her once a week or once every 2 weeks, she lives with me and we have a great relationship! :)
  • MdmAcolyte
    MdmAcolyte Posts: 382 Member
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    Im pretty fortunate that when I see things start to go downhill, we have the talk, and a lot of times we are both on the same page. I should note that 9 times out of 10 we were already friends so staying friends wasn't an issue. There are few F***tards though that became obsessive crazy suicidal stalkers that I cannot say the same for, in which case, I was over them way before we even talked about having the talk...

    True story ~ One time, a guy that I had broken up moved to another city to recuperate, and one day he called me saying he was coming by to see me. The next day a friend called and told me he was in the NEWSPAPER because he tried to rob a 7-11 on a BICYCLE so he'd have money to come see... He'd told a friend he'd get some money, steal a car, and come teach me a lesson on why I should be with a winner like him. Hahahahaha

    Who's got two thumbs and dodged a bullet? <--- This girl!! OMFG...
  • CarleyLovesPets
    CarleyLovesPets Posts: 410 Member
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    Still day by day for me.

    This.

    It's been 4 months.
    I've finally blocked him on facebook (deleted him the day we broke up) a few days ago so he can't contact me ever again.
    I still haven't been able to delete all the photos of us.

    We were common law married and living together for 2.8 years.
    We broke up on our three year anniversary.

    It's been tough, really tough.
    But day by day it's getting better.
  • mt130022
    mt130022 Posts: 48 Member
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    Well, when I've dome the breaking up, then I'm usually over it by the time I get the balls to break if off (which doesn't mean I'm not sad about it but I'm ready to move on once its done), when being broken up with,..well it can take more time.

    This is me also. Thankfully, I FINALLY had enough. Once I didn't CRY, I knew I was done. :glasses:
  • LadyIvysMom
    LadyIvysMom Posts: 391 Member
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    My last ex & I were together for a few years but having problems and I was not happy in the relationship for months before we actually broke up. I should have left a lot sooner than I did because I knew he and I wanted different things out of life. So I was kind of already over him when we actually split up. There was a brief period of “oh, it’s really over. Sad.” but to be honest, I’d already kind of emotionally readied myself and ended up dating my now husband (who I’d been friends with previously) a few weeks later, although hubby and I didn’t get serious until about 6 months into our dating as hubby wanted to be sure I was *really* over my ex.

    During the time when I was dating hubby, me and the ex were not talking. Before I got married, my ex and I reconnected on FB and became friends and he is one of my dearest friends to this day. He’s actually the one who got me hooked on MFP. We see each other offline maybe once a month for movie nights with friends etc.

    The guy I dated before THAT, we lived together for a couple of years. We broke up one day literally by having this convo “do you still want to be together?” “No” “Can we still be roommates?” “Sure” and we broke up, moved on, dated other people but continued to live together as roommates and buddies for a few more years. We just moved into separate rooms. He’s also one of my best friends. He was at my wedding. He’s like a brother to me now. We live 5 minutes away from each other. Sometimes he gives me a lift to work.

    My husband thinks my former roommate is a great guy. He’s never met the other guy in person but harbors no ill will towards him or anything like that. Hubby’s just not as social as me and usually doesn’t venture out to the movie nights etc.

    So I don’t know how to answer your question. I got over them both romantically very quickly. But since they are two of my best friends, it feels weird to say I’m “over” them since I love them like bro’s and hope they are in my life as friends forever.

    They’re both on my MFP friends list and probably reading this lol so hi guys! <3 ya!

    I take losing platonic friends much harder. By contrast, my ex-best friend was a man I never dated. Never had any romantic connection to at all. We were inseperable best friends. He moved halfway across the state to live in the same apartment house as me when I lived with my ex. We were together every day. He was the "man of honor" in my wedding.

    A year and a half ago, he met a really awful and psychotic woman who demanded he cease all contact with ALL of his friends, including and especially me. He stopped speaking to me (and all his other friends) on March 19th 2011. None of us have heard from him since. I only know he is still alive because he still lives in the unit below my ex.

    I am not over that and I don't know if I ever will be. :(
  • MonicaLee92
    MonicaLee92 Posts: 222
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    Depends on the ex, there was a guy I dated years ago and I can still look back and be sad that it ended. But there is my recent ex who I dated for two and a half years and I was over him in like a week. Haha.
  • LeilaFace
    LeilaFace Posts: 412 Member
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    Depends on the relationship. I'm happily married now but still grieve a little over my first marriage (not that I'd ever want to be with him again, he's married and has a kid and we still catch up every now and then). However my relationship before my current husband was a 2-year ordeal and I was over him the minute he told me if I had Cancer he wasn't going to stick around and then when I did break up with him he beat me and left me with fingerprints on my neck...
  • freckledrats
    freckledrats Posts: 251 Member
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    The only person it took me a long time to get over was someone I was never truly dating. It took... 6 months? I had it bad :( But eventually the fact that he was a dillhole and completely full of himself made it easier to let go, so I suspect it would be harder with an actual good guy you had deep feelings for.

    Best of luck :)
  • chrishgt4
    chrishgt4 Posts: 1,222 Member
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    Pro-tip fellas: don't cheat on your girlfriend with multiple women, make her quit her job (by way of serious threats) to be a stay at home mom because "that's how it's supposed to be," then spend all your money on blow and expect her to take you back when she dumps your sorry *kitten*.

    Duly noted...
  • KCoolBeanz
    KCoolBeanz Posts: 813 Member
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    My marriage was over before it was officially "over". The time I took after he moved out, was for me to get to know myself again, not to get over him :-)
  • RainHoward
    RainHoward Posts: 1,599 Member
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    bout 5 minutes, two shot of tequila and a smile from a pretty girl.
  • Shawty_Ro
    Shawty_Ro Posts: 135
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    took about 2 years to not let him bk into my thoughts, the things he did though I will never get over, I just learned to deal with it better.
  • DesignGuy
    DesignGuy Posts: 457 Member
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    About half a minute maybe. I don't hold on to the past, I embrace the present and look to the future. **** happens, that's life. If it's right, it's right and if it's not, it's not.

    :)
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
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    There was about a 2 year period after my divorce that were pretty much about the body count at my place. Eventually though, I started being open to relationships longer than 2 weeks and got back to normal.

    Actually, saw my ex on FB yesterday celebrating her 17 year old daughter's birthday. I was amazed to find that she still has an emotional effect on me. After all these years though, it's all good.
  • Becoming_A_Butterfly
    Becoming_A_Butterfly Posts: 2,534 Member
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    By the time I am ready to end a relationship, I am pretty much over it already. I like to feel like I have tried everything I could possibly try, within reason, so I can walk away with no regrets. That is not to say I don't feel sad about the end of the relationship, but I am far more focused on healing and moving on.

    I also don't keep unnecessary ties to exes (facebook friends, emails, or other contact). When it's over, it's over.
  • Chrissy9632
    Chrissy9632 Posts: 24
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    We have a daughter together so it made it harder at first to get over him. Now with the way he acts towards me and our daughter made it really easy to be happy that he's someone else's problem. :)
  • quietHiker
    quietHiker Posts: 1,442 Member
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    I only have 2 ex's....and the ex who took the longest to get over for me was interestingly my shortest relationship. He just knew me. It took a good...4 years to get over him (3 of those years I was dating someone else). I think some people are just meant to stick with you for a while.
  • sowonderfultonight
    sowonderfultonight Posts: 41
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    About 10 seconds. He walked out of my room after I said I don't have time for a relationship and would prefer just being friends, and he slammed my back door. Lost all sympathy at that moment, to be honest v.v
  • Carlyannabelle
    Carlyannabelle Posts: 621 Member
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    Long before it was officially over

    ^^^ This.

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