Ex's - how long did it take you to get over yours?

jboccio90

Long before it was officially over

same! I was over him before we were even over.

dfborders

I think for each person it is different. In your situation are the two of you absolutely certain this is the road you want to take? Have you hashed it all out? If so, then total removal. I speak from experience as it took me years to get over an ex - every time I thought I was over him we would somehow meet up and that would start everything back over again - unfortunately shortly thereafter the bad habits and issues that caused our break-up in the first place would just come right back. We both had to realize that we just couldn't be friends - it wasn't possible. With that said - I do think of him from time time - basically I just hope and pray that he found himself and got himself together and has found a wonderful woman to share his life with.

joann1948

It just depends. I dont think you ever completely get over him. You will probably always have him in your heart. They say time heals all wounds but that never worked for me....Good Luck

curvykim78

I usually got over them when I found out they were lying, cheaters in about 10 minutes.

SuperSexyDork

With my daughter's father... I was over it before it was officially over. He was an abusive ahole and it took me too long to realize that he made me loathe myself and I had to end it. Fortunately enough for me our living arrangements for the next 4 months made it so I would never ever consider getting back with him. (We were renting a 3 bedroom house and decided to continue living in it together until the contract was up. He and his girlfriend shared one room, I had another room and our infant daughter had the 3rd room... Even though he was with her, he was constantly trying to get us back together- figure that one out!)

Julescg26

It can take a really long time. Some take years. Others, months. It takes as long as it takes. However, like someone once said; Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.

This bit almost made me cry!!

I was with my ex 8 years (got married in that time), have been split up just over a year, and we are still really good friends - think the relationship side kind of dwindled but the friendship side stayed. It took about 9 months till I realised I'd like to be with someone again and not just him all the time! Now I'm just a bit miserable cause I have no one to wrap me in their big strong arms and hug me - that's the bit I miss the most!

VanessaHeartsMasr

I'm still not over mine, and our relationship ended over 10 years ago. I'm married and have kids and love my husband and children, but something about that first true love you can never quite get over.

pinkgumdrop123

i think I was over him before the relationship even ended...it probably should have ended a lot sooner than it did so that's why!

Crochetluvr

Probably a couple months...although we lived together for 4 years before we actually got divorced.

Prettylittlelotus

Hmm, every ex I had besides one I was over the moment I decided he wasn't good enough for me.

The "one" that I couldn't get over is now my fiancé. We broke up 5 years ago, but spoke to each other almost every day for the entire duration of our break up. Then last year, when I was with someone else, he confessed he still loved me. I broke up with that guy--it wasn't working out anyways--and a month or so later I was back with my best friend and haven't looked back. I can't imagine spending my life with anyone else.

Kekibird

Depends on the heartbreak I guess.

First love ended things with me after we planned to be married and have kids. Because it felt sudden to me, it took me a good long time to get over that one.

My last heartbreak was easier because I knew it was over long before we ended things. Plus he went a little bonkers and I had to protect myself from him so that made it easier to let go of the relationship.

onedayillbeamilf

Which one?

I need to know which ex we're talking about to tell you how long it took. Some 2 hours, some a few months.

pinkgumdrop123

By the time I am ready to end a relationship, I am pretty much over it already. I like to feel like I have tried everything I could possibly try, within reason, so I can walk away with no regrets. That is not to say I don't feel sad about the end of the relationship, but I am far more focused on healing and moving on.

I also don't keep unnecessary ties to exes (facebook friends, emails, or other contact). When it's over, it's over.

yup exactly

vkruithof

for me 9 years now, and i was out for almost 2 years before i ended it. the last one has been 5 years now and it was mutual but the heartbreak of my life.

none of them are easy.

if you truly have your heart/soul into it, i don't think you ever really 'get over them'. you move on. you meet new people, you take new chances and you love again. but the others always have a special place in your heart that always belongs to just them.

i'm a sap like that. in some ways i'm the man, i can kick a man outa my bed the next am and move on to the next guy without thinking twice about it, but if i invest myself; it's harder to cut the ties.

good luck!

MisterGoodBar

4yrs but lulls of residual.

jenbit

I've only had to relationships cause I tend to stick it out.

My Ex-husband and I were together from the time we were 19 til I was 26- He left six weeks after my son was born. It was a shock to me and then I found out he had an affair. It took my less than 2 months to get over her. (ANger helps alot)


With My ex-boyfriend I dumped him after 5yrs so about 5 minutes. By the time I ended it I was so done with everything that I didnt feel bad at all

allifantastical

I'm at 5 months and it is still hard for me some days. I had to get over the loss of all the things were were planning that would never happen, a wedding, kids, etc. But being single is also very freeing. You don't have to worry about anyone but yourself. Once you embrace that, you can really start to enjoy life!

Best wishes!

MissAnjy

I was in love with an ex-boyfriend once. I could see that it wasn't going anywhere, even though I was desperately in love with him, and I ended it and moved on to someone else. After I left, and "moved on", it literally took me at least another 3 years to feel over him and not affected by him, etc. It was a very difficult time.

The guy I left him for, I eventually married. I separated from him a little over a year ago now. I was "over him" before I even left the marriage, however, I'm still dealing with a lot of fall out from the relationship/marriage. I'm over HIM, but not over things that happened in the marriage etc.

kingscrown

My ex before DH took me years really. We weren't in contact the first 3 years of the split which helped a lot. When I got an invite to his mother's wedding (2nd marriage after be a widow) I went. Seeing him really reenforced that the breakup was a good thing. I dated and thought of him often over the years, but I always knew we made the right decision. It really wasn't until I met my husband about 4 years later that I truly got him out of my brain.

Xstitcher74

After a seventeen year marriage that he ended, it took about a year and a half. You don't spend that long with someone and share parenting of two children without some healing needing to occur before your really move on with your life. At least for me. Now, a new chapter in my life. This one's gonna be great!

eatcleanNtraindirty

OP I'll help you get over him! As the saying goes...

With my past exes each one was a 6 month long relationship (weird, I know)

The first one I was over it about 15 minutes after she broke up with me. She must've been on the same page as me and just wanted out.

One of them it took me a year or two to get over her (I was convinced she was the love of my life at the time and she broke up with me out of the blue)

The most recent one it took me 2 solid months of working hard and trying not to think of her. Then we started to talked about 3 months after we broke up and that was fine but now she started dating this Ahole and so I think about her all the time this last couple weeks since we talked last. (the guy, a 41 yr old ex special forces, threatened to kill me and my exes ex husband if we ever talked to her. He blew his lid when I texted her one day.)

MizKittyB

Well, when I've dome the breaking up, then I'm usually over it by the time I get the balls to break if off (which doesn't mean I'm not sad about it but I'm ready to move on once its done), when being broken up with,..well it can take more time.

This was me, on my last long-term relationship. It was going downhill loooong before it was over, and I finally got tired of feeling like a second-class citizen. So I ended it. (He didn't get it, right away, and probably still doesn't understand how hurtful his behavior was. I can't fix that, I can only get myself out and to a healthier place.) Haven't dated since, though. The one thing I learned was that I am in NO hurry to find someone and settle down - there are too many other interesting things to do than search for a mate!

CassieLyle

I was with my ex husband for 10 yrs.. We seperated when our son was 6 months old.. It probably took me 5 months to move on.. then I met my bf now and it didnt take me long to completely move on once we got together..

beckssmith70

hmm text hubby from Auckland airport and was over him by the time the plane landed in Manchester

WalkingGirl1985

First time: 2+ years. (first love--together for 2 years)

Second/final time: 3-6 months..(same guy--he was a player and has never changed..together for 10 months 4 years after the first split)

I dumped my ex because I fell for someone else..can't be with someone who plays you all the time..today I love my fiancee and been going strong 7 years. :bigsmile:

toriaenator

i would say about 6 months; once he came out of the closet to me the process quickened...

mazzasweet

As arbitrary as it may be, i've heard it takes one month for every year you were together.
I was with my ex for almost 8 years - broke up last October... I feel like i'm 'over' him - it's been 11 months.
Sometimes I THINK I miss him -- but really I don't miss HIM, I just want someone to be my partner.
Hang in there :-( It does get better!

dodihere

About an hour, to call the police and have him arrested.

Drop_it_Like_Its_Hawt

Oh man, I was about to say "about as long as it takes to get a restraining order enforced". Been there, dodihere!

Skinny_minny_mo

Oh man, I was about to say "about as long as it takes to get a restraining order enforced". Been there, dodihere!

lol!!