The kiss of death!!!!!
Replies
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We're all sassy in our own ways :smooched:0
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Every woman has their own special beautiful qualities....
Maybe I should I said this more like "I would share my sausage with any of you ladies in a well trimmed yard"0 -
A man's car breaks down on the road at twilight, so he walks himself to a nearby farmhouse. He knocks on the door, and the most beautiful woman he has ever seen answers the door. He asks for a place to stay, and she calls her father to the door. The father agrees to let the man sleep in the barn. He walks him to the barn, and as he is closing the door, he says "if you don't sleep with my daughter, i'll let you marry her. But if you sleep with her, I'll shoot you." And he shuts the door behind him.
The man thinks, "wow, what a great deal!"
The next morning, the father opens the barn door, holding a shotgun. He yells and startles the man awake "Drop your pants".
The man drops his pants, and his man parts are covered in green glitter. The father shoots him dead.
This happens again a few weeks later, with the same outcome...
A third man gets a flat tire on the road at twilight, and walks to the farmhouse, is greeted by the same beautiful woman, led into the barn, and given the same warning.
The next morning, the father bursts into the barn with his shotgun. "Drop your pants!"
The man drops his pants. To the father's surprise, there is no green glitter. Shocked he says "You didn't sleep with my daughter! I am offering you her hand in marriage!"
The man smiles excitedly, and suddenly, the father raises his shotgun.
Green glitter.0 -
A man's car breaks down on the road at twilight, so he walks himself to a nearby farmhouse. He knocks on the door, and the most beautiful woman he has ever seen answers the door. He asks for a place to stay, and she calls her father to the door. The father agrees to let the man sleep in the barn. He walks him to the barn, and as he is closing the door, he says "if you don't sleep with my daughter, i'll let you marry her. But if you sleep with her, I'll shoot you." And he shuts the door behind him.
The man thinks, "wow, what a great deal!"
The next morning, the father opens the barn door, holding a shotgun. He yells and startles the man awake "Drop your pants".
The man drops his pants, and his man parts are covered in green glitter. The father shoots him dead.
This happens again a few weeks later, with the same outcome...
A third man gets a flat tire on the road at twilight, and walks to the farmhouse, is greeted by the same beautiful woman, led into the barn, and given the same warning.
The next morning, the father bursts into the barn with his shotgun. "Drop your pants!"
The man drops his pants. To the father's surprise, there is no green glitter. Shocked he says "You didn't sleep with my daughter! I am offering you her hand in marriage!"
The man smiles excitedly, and suddenly, the father raises his shotgun.
Green glitter.
Good one!0 -
Well people, I'm going away for a few days so don't be alarmed if you don't see me and my grapefruit for a bit.
Be good. I'll miss you.0 -
Have fun
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we will miss your wit and your grapefruits.... have a wonderful time!0
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Well people, I'm going away for a few days so don't be alarmed if you don't see me and my grapefruit for a bit.
Be good. I'll miss you.
If I put out the fire would you and those lucious grapefruits stay?0 -
Well people, I'm going away for a few days so don't be alarmed if you don't see me and my grapefruit for a bit.
Be good. I'll miss you.
If I put out the fire would you and those lucious grapefruits stay?
It's not you, it's me0 -
Well people, I'm going away for a few days so don't be alarmed if you don't see me and my grapefruit for a bit.
Be good. I'll miss you.
If I put out the fire would you and those lucious grapefruits stay?
It's not you, it's me
D'OH!0 -
ok everyone, i'm out for the rest of the evening... kickboxing, then work (away from my internet, how will i survive????)
see you tomorrow
:flowerforyou:0 -
Morning all!!! I would like to name today... Filthy Friday!!!!0
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Morning all!!! I would like to name today... Filthy Friday!!!!
Morning all, plans for the weekend are moving things about and tidying up, dealing with some mould that has appeared, making sure the drains are running well and some minor home improvements, so in summary I will be:
Humping, Rodding and a bit of DIY
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Morning all!!! I would like to name today... Filthy Friday!!!!
Morning all, plans for the weekend are moving things about and tidying up, dealing with some mould that has appeared, making sure the drains are running well and some minor home improvements, so in summary I will be:
Humping, Rodding and a bit of DIY
Thanks Chris, but that wasn't the kind of filth I had in mind :laugh: :laugh:0 -
I have caught up now........Doh!0
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OK, tinz has just suggested the first topic of the day...
I have a first date tonight, what should I wear??? This should be interesting...0 -
I was kind of hoping you would model the various selections of underwear and we could tell you which ones look best???? no???0
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Haha, no! And anyway, you don't want to see my underwear, let's just say I've been single for a long time and I need to go shopping lol0
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Ah... Bridget Jones?0
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Haha, no. Just old! lol0
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