How do I get my wife to stop lifting heavy?

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Replies

  • Nina1007
    Nina1007 Posts: 150
    Would it help if I spray-painted her dumbbells pink?

    I definitely think it would. Dipped in glitter too.

    I actually would be more inclined to lift if the dumbbells were pink and glittery.

    I would totally buy glittery dumbbbells lol
  • belladonna786
    belladonna786 Posts: 1,165 Member
    Punch her in the balls






    lmfao!!!!!!!!
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    It's only been about 2 weeks, but already she's started bulging and her shirts are ripping to shreds. We can't really afford to buy new clothes every month. She's also started growing dark hair in all the wrong places, and her sex drive is through the roof (I'm still sore). What am I supposed to do?

    Get an annulment. He/She scammed you. He/She stopped taking her Estrogen supplements after the surgery she had prior to meeting you.
  • tbellamy1
    tbellamy1 Posts: 353
    This was funny!!!!! Hope she doesn't turn green!
  • _Ivian
    _Ivian Posts: 198
    Tell her the Shake Weight is better...for lifting and her sex drive :wink:
  • LondonEliza
    LondonEliza Posts: 456 Member
    Would it help if I spray-painted her dumbbells pink?

    I definitely think it would. Dipped in glitter too.

    I actually would be more inclined to lift if the dumbbells were pink and glittery.

    Now I want pink glittery kettlebells!! Do you think I could get 10kg versions of THOSE in Macys :)
  • MellyGibson
    MellyGibson Posts: 297 Member
    Two questions:

    1) Where is she lifting these heavy weights?

    2a) If it's not at home, why did you unchain her long enough to go the gym?

    2b) If it IS at home...shorten the chain so she can't reach YOUR weights! And explain to her that it's NOT acceptable to touch your things.

    I don't know why you'd put up with that. Seriously, you're doing something wrong if she thinks it's OK to do something for herself and not you.
  • _Timmeh_
    _Timmeh_ Posts: 2,096 Member
    tumblr_m0611ldbfy1qcukfzo1_500.jpg
  • msafunk
    msafunk Posts: 163 Member
    You should sit her down on Pinterest and help her find the "Kitchen Counter Workout." It's a variation on Barre exercises, except she can do it without ever leaving her rightful place.
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    I think you should set an example for your wife by doing Zumba together. But don;t use those weight-maracas, you don't want to bulk up.
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
    ... her sex drive is through the roof (I'm still sore). What am I supposed to do?

    Are you seriously asking this question? :laugh: This cracks me up! F&$k her silly comes to mind, and if you can't handle it, then up your own exercise to keep up...sheesh. :noway:
  • msafunk
    msafunk Posts: 163 Member
    tumblr_m0611ldbfy1qcukfzo1_500.jpg

    This.is.awesome.
  • nerdyandilikeit
    nerdyandilikeit Posts: 2,185 Member

    Buy her a copy of P90x or Insanity along with a new broom and dust pan for Christmas. The video will make her go from ripped and sexy to skinny and skeleton-ish in no time flat and the broom will increase her productivity around the house. Just be nice and get her initials engraved on it, now that says love.

    Can you please tell my husband where to get me an engraved broom & dustpan for Christmas?? That's all I really, really want!!! It would make my life complete :bigsmile:

    I can make you one with a knife from my drawer and $19.95 + S&H.
  • Determinednoob
    Determinednoob Posts: 2,001 Member
    This seemed like too much

    35et2u.jpg



    So I chose this



    sarcasm.jpg
  • TexasTroy
    TexasTroy Posts: 477 Member
    " HOw do you get your wife to stop lifting heavy "???

    Answer: GET OFF HER !!

    hehe.
  • Fitorbust73
    Fitorbust73 Posts: 80 Member
    I grow giant pumpkins if you would like to purchase one to keep her in please send me your address and credit card details.... I am sure she will love living in her pumpkin shell
  • bostongeek
    bostongeek Posts: 80 Member
    Replace all her weights with pots and pans. When she complains that they're too light, tell her to put food in them. At this point her womanly instinct will kick in and she'll start cooking and your problem will be solved.
  • lotushead
    lotushead Posts: 200 Member
    It's only been about 2 weeks, but already she's started bulging and her shirts are ripping to shreds. We can't really afford to buy new clothes every month. She's also started growing dark hair in all the wrong places, and her sex drive is through the roof (I'm still sore). What am I supposed to do?

    Get an annulment. He/She scammed you. He/She stopped taking her Estrogen supplements after the surgery she had prior to meeting you.

    Now that's clever! hahaha
  • andreanicole686
    andreanicole686 Posts: 406 Member
    I hope this is a joke.
  • Treece68
    Treece68 Posts: 780 Member
    Hey guys, I'm having a bit of trouble at home lately. Recently, my wife has gotten into lifting heavy weights. How can I tell her to stick to cardio with the rest of the ladies without sounding like a total jerk? I told her than men don't really like women who lift, but she said I should love her no matter what. She's trying to lose weight anyway, so lifting weights is really counter productive. It's only been about 2 weeks, but already she's started bulging and her shirts are ripping to shreds. We can't really afford to buy new clothes every month. She's also started growing dark hair in all the wrong places, and her sex drive is through the roof (I'm still sore). What am I supposed to do?
    This is a joke right? If not you may be living with Jennifer Walters
  • graceylou222
    graceylou222 Posts: 198 Member
    I really hope you're joking...?

    Lifting weights is really good for women, from a fitness and appearance point of view, as well as from a physiological/health point of view, for example it helps to improve bone density...

    Technically a woman shouldn't be able to get too big, or body-builder-like without taking a little extra something on the side, our bodies don't produce enough testosterone...

    this ^^^
  • CannibalisticVegetarian
    CannibalisticVegetarian Posts: 1,255 Member
    " HOw do you get your wife to stop lifting heavy "???

    Answer: GET OFF HER !!

    hehe.

    BA DUM PSH!
  • YogaNikki
    YogaNikki Posts: 284 Member
    Would it help if I spray-painted her dumbbells pink?

    I definitely think it would. Dipped in glitter too.

    I actually would be more inclined to lift if the dumbbells were pink and glittery.

    Pink and glitter makes everything awesome :)
  • SarahCW1979
    SarahCW1979 Posts: 572 Member
    Would it help if I spray-painted her dumbbells pink?

    I definitely think it would. Dipped in glitter too.

    Just not round the handle bit, that stuff itches.
  • _Bob_
    _Bob_ Posts: 1,487 Member
    lol, this is great. it's funny that some people still believe this stuff. girls that lift heavy only get hotter, unless they take steroids... then they just get scary
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
    Hey guys, I'm having a bit of trouble at home lately. Recently, my wife has gotten into lifting heavy weights. How can I tell her to stick to cardio with the rest of the ladies without sounding like a total jerk? I told her than men don't really like women who lift, but she said I should love her no matter what. She's trying to lose weight anyway, so lifting weights is really counter productive. It's only been about 2 weeks, but already she's started bulging and her shirts are ripping to shreds. We can't really afford to buy new clothes every month. She's also started growing dark hair in all the wrong places, and her sex drive is through the roof (I'm still sore). What am I supposed to do?

    Shackle that bish to the stove where she belongs.
  • cmacphee3
    cmacphee3 Posts: 278 Member
    :D Thanks for cracking me up!
  • chachita7
    chachita7 Posts: 996 Member
    LOL... good luck with your prob....
  • Carlyannabelle
    Carlyannabelle Posts: 621 Member
    Would it help if I spray-painted her dumbbells pink?

    I definitely think it would. Dipped in glitter too.

    Ooooo glitter!!! Even better!
  • BriskaPacojame
    BriskaPacojame Posts: 195 Member
    Love this!!

    Funny as *kitten* made funnier by the people who don't realize it's hilarious.

    Edit to say, I want pink glittery weights!! lol
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