I need a good comeback! Tired of being made fun of...

Marksman21

"Wow, I came here for Thanksgiving Dinner, not 5th grade recess. Grow up, or I leave, and you can enjoy your Holidays."

I actually did pull this number one thanksgiving over another matter. It was petty and pointless, but it was getting on my nerves to the point that it was just upseting. I stood up, said just that, and held my ground, prepped to just walk out. Natrually some reacted to attitude with attitude, and deciding I wanted no part of it, turned around, left, and went to my bags to prep to pack.

Within 10 minutes, they cleaned up their act.

That said, if you're going to make the statement, be prepared to back it up. It shouldn't be a bluff, but a promise, if they're going to make you feel unwelcome, they can have their holiday without you. However, you made your choice, stand for it, and don't take s**t from anyone.

lydia_the_tattooed_lady

I get this too!!! Except without the animal sounds. However, since my mom tried veganism my family has backed off a lot. Some of them even tried it! I try to avoid the topic and get my food in peace lol Now it's mostly just my older brothers and one rude sis-in-law who give me crap about it. The other sis-in-law just tries to mother me and get me to eat meat out of concern hahaha Even my southern, country family that we'll be visiting for Thanksgiving are pretty understanding about it.

dawnp1833

My nephew has been a vegetarian since birth and people always made those stupid comments too. (Don't you just want to TRY a little turkey? etc.)

Here's what you need to do - get someone (like your husband!) to respond. One year I gave up meat out of solidarity, so he wasn't the sole target. And when they made comments I announced "don't you think you've harassed him about it enough over the past 15 years? How about we let him enjoy a holiday with you, before he figures out that you're just a bunch of A-holes and stops coming." And that pretty much ended it. Once he was around 18 he was old enough to start giving people lectures about GMOs and such and people learned to shut up and not comment about any of the food.

"there are just so many other delicious things to eat, I don't want turkey taking up space on my plate" also works.

ronitabur

* Bring a Poult (baby turkey) to the party.

* Rent "Forks Over Knives" and pop it in the player just as dinner is to be served.

* Bring a See-And-Say toy to the party and play the sounds as they are eating.

OK, seriously, just tell them how you feel, or at least tell the most influential and sensitive person in the family how you are feeling in a private convesation - the word will get around or the person will likely stick up for you while it's happening.

Good luck.

likemeinvisible

"Because *kitten* you, that's why"

FTW.

Ditto. They'll probably just stare at you.

This. That's what I say when family asks me why I run.

Trechechus

I'm passive aggressive, too, but perhaps you should talk to them about it flat out. Point out to them that you don't ridicule them for their morals and you expect them to show you the same respect. They are your family and friends, they should understand that.

zyxst

Juliejustsaying

"Because *kitten* you, that's why"

I think I'm in love.....:flowerforyou:

How YOU doing?

sss1966

I think by the sounds of it u are going to have to be blunt with them. They do it because they think they are being funny. My daughter has the same but not to your extent. She has been a vegetarian for 17 years carand its the meat eaters that make
The fuss. Just say. I know you don't understand why i eat as a vegetarian but i disagree with the disgusting way animals are farmer and no thoughts for their welfare that i would not eat anything on my plate that once had a face. I bet none of them understand how the animals on their plate werey slaughtered

Countryboy_

"Because *kitten* you, that's why"

]
THIS. With bells on.

DocMarr

If you want to change someone else's behaviour then the person to start with is yourself. This is a repeating family scenario and everyone is repeating the 'same old, same old' roles within it. As it is obviously causing you distress then it is indeed time to break that particular merry-go-round (or carousel as you're American) and you do that by changing the dynamic, so that the outcome changes.

A good book to read is called 'Hot Buttons' (How to resolve conflict and cool everyone down- by Evans and Cohen - costs $14 on Amazon) - it explains about how you can identify what it is that triggers you off, and how you perpetuate the dynamic by the way you react. If you react differently then the dynamic changes. It has lots of great suggestions about how to handle this successfully.

I used to have constant arguments with my mum - she'd say something, I'd take offence, I'd snip back at her and she'd then say something else and it escalated into an argument, which invariably ended up by me losing my temper and walking out. Happened that way for 20 years.

Using the techniques I learned in the book, next time she made a comment, I saw that she'd pushed a button that normally started an argument, but this time I didn't rise to the bait - I just laughed it off with 'Oh you're not going to raise that old chestnut again, haven't we done that to death? LOL' - and I instead introduced a different topic and the conversation went off in a different direction. Change the dynamic = change the outcome.

The key point to realise is that YOU are the one with the issue here. YOU are the one who gets upset with people mentioning that you are a vegetarian. If you don't let yourself get upset then they can talk to you about it until they are blue in the face and it wouldn't make a difference. The problem is that it pushes your Hot Button and sends you off into defensive mode. If you didn't rise to the bait then they'd soon lose interest. So the person you need to change is yourself - change how you think, and change how you handle yourself when someone attacks your beliefs. That way you can change the outcome.

I hope that the book helps. It helped me. Best of luck!

bokodasu

Then the adults make jokes and puts the meat in front of me and starts making animal sounds. It's very disrespectful to me and I'm sick of it.

You mean the small children, right? I have a hard time believing an adult would do this.

(Ok, really I've met people so I don't, but seriously, what are they, 12-year-old boys? Miss Manners needs to have a chat with them.)

Veg for 20 years here, but I haven't gotten this for the last... oh, 15 or so of those. A long stare, the same kind you'd give them if they took a dump on the table, followed by "... wow, really?" and turning to talk to someone else generally works for me. No P-A FB posts, no "defending" yourself (nobody who respects you would need an argument, and anyone who doesn't isn't going to listen to you anyway), just an acknowledgement of their bad behavior and moving on.

Good luck. I've been blessed with a non-crappy family, I hope yours comes around.

mynameiscarrie

"Because *kitten* you, that's why"

bahahahahahaha so much this.

3foldchord

They mock you and make animal noises???
That is so rude, childish, mean. I would refuse to goof my family acted that way. ( and I have not gone for other reasons, too)

My response would be more like "How old are you? 5?"

Crochetluvr

I even get this “Jesus ate fish. So if he was giving you a piece of fish you wouldn't eat it?” If Jesus was standing in front of me I would probably pass out and not give a damn about the fish lol.

There is your comeback....It made me LOL, too!

keem88

bring gruesome photos of slaughterhouses with you and leave them on the dinner table before meal time. that will shut them up. or, what everyone else said...**** off. i hate that ****, i too am a vegetarian (not as long as you, only 10 years) and i ****ing hate when people are like you don't eat me? what do you eat? i eat food, dumbass.

Yeah, I clean and eat lots wild game and fish...that wouldn't phase me...

alright, well not everyone does.

RLehotsky

Just be who you are. I am the outcast of my family because I chose to be different therefor It is just my husband and I and his family who are mature and love enough to accept me for who I am. One thing to remeber is ( Hold your head up high with diginity and be true to yourself. ) those who truly love you will stand beside you through it all.

funsiiz

People need to mind there own business...why does it matter to them what you eat?

:flowerforyou: Have a great day

Stella2070

I have the opposite problem. I get made fun of for eating undercooked meat, but it usually turns out the same way; people making animal sounds. I just eat like an animal and don't worry about it. After a long day of smelling dinner cooking and going to the gym all week I'm just too hungry to care.

Weird, I have never been made fun of for this.

You're welcomed to take my place at the family christmas party. When they have a barbecue, I cook my own food. My mom will boil a roast for three days and then cook it, because she thinks she's going to get mad cow disease. I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum. I used to get in trouble all the time when I was a kid getting into raw meat in the fridge.

I think your mother is my mother's twin! When I first discovered I preferred meat on the raw side (I know, gross to some, but I would sneak the hamburger and sausage from the fridge and if you haven't already, you really should try some cured country ham- it's yummy, like southern proscuitto), and would ask her to cook my steaks, bacon or whatever, enough to heat the seasonings she was using to cook everything and she would tell me "you really didn't like it that way" and then proceed to cook it to the point of what tastes burnt in my opinion!

BritneysStuntDouble

With the holidays coming up I get the “Desarae do you want some Ham? Oh, sorry forgot you were a vegetarian.”

aliann30

I would detail exactly how their turkey is butchered (with every juicy, disgusting fact you can) and shock them into silence (and perhaps disgust at what is sitting on their plate. Hey, I'm not a vegetarian, I'll still eat turkey, but I know hearing about the preparation of it probably would churn my stomach while I was trying to eat it.)...but I think that would be hilarious and probably drive the point straight to home. Here's ehow's description:

To kill the turkey, hang it by its feet. Hold the head and beak with one hand as you cut the turkey's throat with the other hand. Cut from one side of the neck to the other, severing the jugular vein, trachea and carotid arteries as you pull the knife quickly across the neck. Heat a large pan of water to 145 degrees. Let the turkey soak water for 45 seconds. Remove the bird from the water and let it cool. Then remove the feathers, leaving the small pinfeathers. Singe the bird to remove the pin feathers. This can be done with a propane torch or blow torch, but be careful not to get the flame too hot. Run the flame quickly over the entire turkey, just enough to singe the pinfeathers. A few of the feathers at the tips of the wings may need to be removed with pliers. Lay the bird breast up on a table and cut between the joints of the knees to remove the feet. Remove the skin flaps between the legs and around the *kitten*, which will open up the body cavity. Cut out the gland under the *kitten*. Be careful not to cut any organs. Reach into the body cavity and remove the organs, including the liver, heart, gizzard, kidneys, esophagus and trachea. Keep the liver, heart and gizzard if you want to cook them, and discard the rest.

Anyway...just an idea.

mztrackfield010407

Smile!! And I mean kinda hard like umm who do you think you are smile!! and remember who you are and that you are amazing. It sounds cliche, but they have issues if they are messing with you so stand your ground and be loving to them, but let them know they are lowering themselves by doing that. Hope that helps

kaotik26

Honestly I would probably just refuse to spend the holidays with them, then when they asked why I'd tell them I have no reason to spend the day with a bunch of *kitten* making me feel like *kitten*.

JAllen32

The Jerk Store called, they want you back.

HAHA! Classic.

delilah47

Because I don't want any. Period! Hopefully, that will stop them in their tracks.

Angie_Fritts

Why don't you just be honest with them...."I know you don't understand why I'm vegetarian and probably never will. It hurts my feelings when questioned about it constantly so can we go this year without the comments?"

This^^^ They are family and probably don't realize how hurtful they are being. They probably think they are being funny! I always had to deal with the "so when are you getting married" for years. It got really old.

BritneysStuntDouble

Because I don't want any. Period! Hopefully, that will stop them in their tracks.

Good call. Period talk always puts a damper on a conversation.

bcattoes

I don't think you will stop them. For some reason some family members seem to this it's not only their right but their duty to scrutinize everything others in the family do. And they relish it. I don't know why, but it's not something you can control.

I'd just smile politely and say "No offense, but you do realize I'm an adult, right? While I appreciate your help, if I want a roll or stuffing, I can get it myself."

cmpollard01

Ok, so I'm not a vegetarian or vegan...but I can empathize. I'm the picky kid in my family. So heaven knows I've heard my fair share of teasing, bullying, and all the rest (I had an ex's dad try to FORCE a piece of squash into my mouth with his fork because I didn't get any when the bowl was passed around). Thanksgiving and Christmas were difficult when I was little, mostly because I was taught to be respectful-I thought that meant being quiet and not sticking up for myself. And my Granny always taught me "if you can't say anything nice, keep your mouth shut!" As I got older, I learned I had inherited her smart-aleck wisdom. Two years ago, my uncle (he's in his 60s...he's seen me eat every frickin' holiday for 31 years!) looks at my plate and says "what, no kale or collard greens? What about the sweet potato casserole? And the black eyed peas? You can't just eat turkey and ham and cranberry sauce!" My response? "Well, I thought I'd leave that other stuff for everyone at the table. You know, veggies are so good for you and ham is so fatty, I thought I'd take the temptation away from you guys. And since I'm a grown adult, I reckon I can eat whatever I darn well please!" Granny was proud, as was my mom, and my uncle just shook his head and walked away.

Coincidently, we haven't been back there for a holiday since. Hmm...

Regardless, if you've expressed your frustration with their comments before and it hasn't ceased, I'd ignore them. Most of the time, all they want is to see that they get a reaction-just like little boys who pull a girl's pigtails. If it STILL doesn't stop, then yeah, break out the crazy (within reason...no trips with silver bracelets on!) Good luck, and I'll be thinking about you!

keem88

and in all seriousness, talk with them about how they are harassing you, and how immature and hurtful it is. if they don't care enough to consider your feelings, then they really do have some issues and you may be better off finding another holiday dinner to attend. sorry to hear that are disrespectful to you, that isn't right.