Why dont girls come up to guys

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  • Feisty_Red
    Feisty_Red Posts: 982 Member
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    because they keep taking out restraining orders against me... fuggers
  • iluvprettyshoes
    iluvprettyshoes Posts: 605 Member
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    I'm 45 and just getting to the age where I realize that as a female just approaching & talking to someone doesn't mean you're hitting on them. I talk to everyone now. So it could just be an age thing for you, maybe the girls just aren't as confident yet.
  • Danny_Boy13
    Danny_Boy13 Posts: 2,094 Member
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    because they keep taking out restraining orders against me... fuggers

    I would welcome you in with open arms Red. :flowerforyou:
  • willwillywilson
    willwillywilson Posts: 229
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    Well I know the reason they don't come up to me (fat). Women are generally pretty shallow.

    And men aren't shallow? They generally approach the thinner/more attractive women as well.

    Do you know for a fact they aren't approaching you because of your weight?

    If you're approaching someone randomly it's based off looks yes, considering the guys women do approach tend to be very fit.
  • Skinny_minny_mo
    Skinny_minny_mo Posts: 1,272 Member
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    Well I know the reason they don't come up to me (fat). Women are generally pretty shallow.

    unfortunately, most people are. that includes men :smile:
  • _JR_
    _JR_ Posts: 830 Member
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    I think many men are too intimidated by a pretty girl to approach her, so they never meet! I see nothing wrong with being a confident woman and making the first move. I've done it several times and never regretted it.

    I dont think it is the intimidation factor but more of the she is too good looking to be available factor.

    REALLY? Men assume good looking women are always taken?

    In my community (a separate, self-contained community on the outskirts of Phoenix), the women are mostly married. The nature of my area is not conducive for single women. So, when I see a good looking woman, with or without a ring, I tend to assume she's married. Besides, unless I see a common ground between us, just walking up with the intention of asking her out makes me feel like a creep. :ohwell:

    ETA: I'm always alone, or with my son or a dog, and have yet to be approached. :sad:
  • kooltray87
    kooltray87 Posts: 501 Member
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    First of all, not all guys dig girls being the first to approach.
    Second of all, sometimes half the fun is getting the guy to approach :-P
    Third of all, not only did I approach my current bf but I also challenged him to a dance off. Best relationship I've ever been in :-P
  • guapogringo
    guapogringo Posts: 201
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    happens to me fairly regularly. Usually at the grocery store. Had it happen a few times as Starbucks as well. Women always seem curious about what I am reading. I am married so this, of course, doesn't go anywhere but I usually don't mind the attention or a nice conversation
  • _JR_
    _JR_ Posts: 830 Member
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    Well I know the reason they don't come up to me (fat). Women are generally pretty shallow.

    And men aren't shallow? They generally approach the thinner/more attractive women as well.

    Do you know for a fact they aren't approaching you because of your weight?

    Some men & women are, and some aren't.
  • mramirez1981
    mramirez1981 Posts: 134
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    I think many men are too intimidated by a pretty girl to approach her, so they never meet! I see nothing wrong with being a confident woman and making the first move. I've done it several times and never regretted it.

    I dont think it is the intimidation factor but more of the she is too good looking to be available factor.

    REALLY? Men assume good looking women are always taken?

    In my community (a separate, self-contained community on the outskirts of Phoenix), the women are mostly married. The nature of my area is not conducive for single women. So, when I see a good looking woman, with or without a ring, I tend to assume she's married. Besides, unless I see a common ground between us, just walking up with the intention of asking her out makes me feel like a creep. :ohwell:

    ETA: I'm always alone, or with my son or a dog, and have yet to be approached. :sad:

    Interesting. So who are men asking out if they are assuming that most good looking women are taken?
  • Haltermania
    Haltermania Posts: 288 Member
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    Biologically speaking, boys are the predators and girls are the prey. :wink:

    this is what i've found. - or maybe have a mental block with this and therefore cant just go upto guys. :smile:

    also i'm generally friendly and have had way too many experiences of friendliness being taken for the thinking 'oohh she likes me'.

    so come on, share some hints and tips on what we can do when approaching a guy?

    Me personally i love sports so if you like sports its fun when a girl knows sports or the team you like or the arch rival. If a girl came up to me that was a cowboys fan it would be fun to talk smack to each other. I have noticed when a guy looks at you several times and hasent come over, he wants to talk but hasent thought of a good way to come over without looking like a creep, if you notice that you could walk over or get closer and hope he says something to you
  • MsNewBooty83
    MsNewBooty83 Posts: 1,003 Member
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    Well I know the reason they don't come up to me (fat). Women are generally pretty shallow.

    ya, we're so shallow. we're so shallow and self absorbed that we only approach men who generally seem to respect women and arent so lacking in self confidence. thats the other thing about us shallow women.
  • melsmith612
    melsmith612 Posts: 727 Member
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    I approach everyone. I'm one of those people that talks to everyone around them out in public regardless of gender, age, looks, etc. Typically though, women don't approach men because they have bad self-esteem and want that feeling of knowing ahead of time that the guy is interested... which usually means the guy approaching them.
  • mramirez1981
    mramirez1981 Posts: 134
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    First of all, not all guys dig girls being the first to approach.
    Second of all, sometimes half the fun is getting the guy to approach :-P
    Third of all, not only did I approach my current bf but I also challenged him to a dance off. Best relationship I've ever been in :-P

    I've never met a man who wasn't happy to be approached. Maybe they are just being nice, but I've never gotten that vibe.
  • willwillywilson
    willwillywilson Posts: 229
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    Well I know the reason they don't come up to me (fat). Women are generally pretty shallow.

    ya, we're so shallow. we're so shallow and self absorbed that we only approach men who generally seem to respect women and arent so lacking in self confidence. thats the other thing about us shallow women.

    And you can tell how much respect a guy has for you by judging his fitness level? LOL I doubt it. There is no way any woman responding how they've approached guys before went off anything other than pure looks.
  • Danny_Boy13
    Danny_Boy13 Posts: 2,094 Member
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    I think many men are too intimidated by a pretty girl to approach her, so they never meet! I see nothing wrong with being a confident woman and making the first move. I've done it several times and never regretted it.

    I dont think it is the intimidation factor but more of the she is too good looking to be available factor.

    REALLY? Men assume good looking women are always taken?

    In my community (a separate, self-contained community on the outskirts of Phoenix), the women are mostly married. The nature of my area is not conducive for single women. So, when I see a good looking woman, with or without a ring, I tend to assume she's married. Besides, unless I see a common ground between us, just walking up with the intention of asking her out makes me feel like a creep. :ohwell:

    ETA: I'm always alone, or with my son or a dog, and have yet to be approached. :sad:

    Interesting. So who are men asking out if they are assuming that most good looking women are taken?

    Majority of the time they are not or settling for another. Hate to word it like that...just KIR.
  • mramirez1981
    mramirez1981 Posts: 134
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    Well I know the reason they don't come up to me (fat). Women are generally pretty shallow.

    ya, we're so shallow. we're so shallow and self absorbed that we only approach men who generally seem to respect women and arent so lacking in self confidence. thats the other thing about us shallow women.

    And you can tell how much respect a guy has for you by judging his fitness level? LOL I doubt it. There is no way any woman responding how they've approached guys before went off anything other than pure looks.

    That's simply not true. I've approached men because they were the life of the party and I loved their personality.
  • crimsoncat
    crimsoncat Posts: 457 Member
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    I "stalked" my fiance around our highschool band room until he liked me. Does that count?
  • Feisty_Red
    Feisty_Red Posts: 982 Member
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    because they keep taking out restraining orders against me... fuggers

    I would welcome you in with open arms Red. :flowerforyou:

    :wink: :wink: :heart:
  • SabrinaLily
    SabrinaLily Posts: 121
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    Some girls do- that's how I met my husband. I had a few drinks on ladies night, started making jokes about the freak television programming on TLC and started surveying the bar about it. Mind you, I had a few drinks but I'm kinda out there and loud to begin with. Long story short, I made him laugh and we've been together over 7 years now :) Just depends although I tend to think women under age 40 are *generally* more likely to approach a guy than those over that age.

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