has anyone out there chosen the new guy?

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124

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  • perfectingpatti
    perfectingpatti Posts: 1,037 Member
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    so cheating is only physical and not emotional? Because I'm guessing you got to know guy #2 while with guy #1, right?

    Cheating can be emotional, too.
  • crystalflame
    crystalflame Posts: 1,049 Member
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    I've never left a guy SOLELY to be with someone else - if I had been in a happy relationship, I wouldn't have been interested in the new guy. But the new guy gave me a solid reason to finally get out of a crappy situation. Been with him 3 1/2 years now =)
  • MissAnjy
    MissAnjy Posts: 2,480 Member
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    so let me get this straight...judging from the lack of details in your post...there's nothing WRONG with the old guy...you just want a newer model?

    .....i'd do that to my microwave....ooops...i mean deathbox...

    but not a guy...

    ha i guess it was vague. nothing wrong with the old guy. But someone else came along who is equally wonderful. Chosing between the "models" and going with the newer one is what I was curious about.

    My advice going off of this is.........go with the "new guy" because if you were that INTO your current guy........you wouldn't even HAVE a "new guy" in mind.
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
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    Honestly, it almost sounds like you're bored of the current guy and looking for a reason to go with the new one. Yes, I have done this and yes, it ended in disaster. Do I regret it? No because I am fully aware that if I really loved guy #1 I wouldn't have had a wandering eye in the first place.

    You really only need to ask yourself one thing, do you look at your current guy and say, "Yeah... I can do better"?

    no not really. i am luck as hell to have him. hes great to me.

    So then, cut off ties with new guy and get better connected with your current hubby. Maybe you're just looking for something he isn't offering you.

    yeah I think your right. I did that earlier today.
  • jamacattack
    jamacattack Posts: 94 Member
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    If you are questioning if you should leave him, I would say probably yes.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
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    so cheating is only physical and not emotional? Because I'm guessing you got to know guy #2 while with guy #1, right?

    Cheating can be emotional, too.


    kinda where I was going with that. and sometimes that's worse than physical. Sadly, I know......
  • bluefox9er
    bluefox9er Posts: 2,917 Member
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    Leave the first guy so he can get on with his life while you pander after the next nice guy to wander along.

    winner
  • elleloch
    elleloch Posts: 739 Member
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    I actually did leave my last boyfriend for someone else. I was with him for six years.

    Granted... the guy I left him for was my high school sweetheart. And we've now been married for two years...
  • 777Gemma888
    777Gemma888 Posts: 9,578 Member
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    No! I chose to part ways with my man after having been together 7 years last year (we'd been friends for 6 years before that). Things started getting complicated. When a good friend of your steady thinks to tell you that he is a better man for you, that is a BIG SIGN that something isn't right. It was difficult because he was/is in the military. Long distance. Multiple Deployments. Younger. Phases of communication blackout ...(Exhale)

    Despite the offer from his friend for me to 'jump ship,' I just can't do that and didn't. I do not judge anyone who would opt to do it. Personally, I prefer to heal, repair and regenerate before moving on, confident that I am not carrying the baggage from my last relationship into my new one. A free and clear me, for me first .
  • Flamenquero
    Flamenquero Posts: 132
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    Why leave, why not just have both?

    well this i would consider cheating.

    If you are just dumping a dude for the next best thing that comes along, why even bother worrying about concepts like "cheating."

    How about taking up with the other chick in your avatar? That would be really hot! :bigsmile:
  • Louisianababy93
    Louisianababy93 Posts: 1,709 Member
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    okay, so i saw a thing floating around pinterest one time it said.

    " if you fall in love with guy number one and fall in love with guy number two. pick guy number two because if you loved guy number one you wouldnt have fell for guy number two"

    or something to that effect.
  • SlickFootAnna
    SlickFootAnna Posts: 611 Member
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    lol this is confusing even me I have replied to so many...theres nothing wrong with my current. Hes great. we share an apartment. I just feel a little weird because I met someone and hes great too. I like to spend time with him and its starting to make me feel guilty. I simply wanted to know if anyone else has ever been in a situation where they met someone new and decided to take a chance. Thats all.

    UGH....
    This thread is going to turn into :

    rU2ig.jpg
  • Colleen118
    Colleen118 Posts: 491 Member
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    MY husband and my Ex-husband were best friends... didn't leave the ex fro my current but our relationship ended their friendship as the ex had decided he wanted me back and I wasn't having it. So because I wouldn't go back to him, he hates my hubby "for taking his last chance to get me".

    Ultimately, if you aren't happy, just leave and find your happy... whether or not the new guy works outs is really not a matter to worry about as long as you are trying to find someone who makes you happy.

    Edited to add:
    And emotional cheating is far more tolling to the other person than the person involved emotionally. I speak from having been in relationships of both instances happening to me that it is easier to work out the physical afflication than it is to work the emotional one. Emotional affairs are far more damaging to your partner. And if you are feeling guilty then that is a sign you know you would be upset if the boyfriend were the one hanging out making friends with some other chick...
  • Flamenquero
    Flamenquero Posts: 132
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    You really only need to ask yourself one thing, do you look at your current guy and say, "Yeah... I can do better"?

    But of course! After all, it is all about you.

    (And then women wonder why men cheat :huh: )
  • mauryr
    mauryr Posts: 385
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    You are only 21 years old. Go out and experience the world. You're not married, and you should be sure to have a large enough sampling of what's out there before you choose one for the long haul.

    Relax, and enjoy. It's just not that serious.
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    In the words of Big Sean as he sang along with Justin Bieber....

    The grass ain't always greener on the other side. It's green where you water it.
  • perfectingpatti
    perfectingpatti Posts: 1,037 Member
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    You are only 21 years old. Go out and experience the world. You're not married, and you should be sure to have a large enough sampling of what's out there before you choose one for the long haul.

    Yeah, because "sampling" many guys is the way to go. BS. Young or not, if you love someone, you're happy and fulfilled, stay with him. Don't lose something good for something "maybe good".
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
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    In the words of Big Sean as he sang along with Justin Bieber....

    The grass ain't always greener on the other side. It's green where you water it.
    Great. Thanks. I'll enjoy that dancing around in my head all day!
  • _Elemenopee_
    _Elemenopee_ Posts: 2,665 Member
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    I don't think I understand the question.
  • Lift_This_
    Lift_This_ Posts: 2,756 Member
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    so let me get this straight...judging from the lack of details in your post...there's nothing WRONG with the old guy...you just want a newer model?

    .....i'd do that to my microwave....ooops...i mean deathbox...

    but not a guy...

    i love my deathbox and will never trade for a new model...it makes my popcorn taste so good.

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